by K. C. Crowne
“She’s a nobody.” Mariah’s words to Gia echoed in my mind as I stood there.
They filled me with an anger I could hardly wrap my mind around.
I closed my eyes and spoke slowly, deliberately.
“You need to leave. Right the fuck now.”
I opened my eyes to see Mariah regarding me with a shocked expression.
“W…what?”
“You heard me. Get out.”
“But…but Gavin.”
“Leave.”
She didn’t. Mariah stayed where he stood, defiance all over her face and in her posture.
“Gavin, I know this isn’t what how you expected this to all happen. But it’s for the best. After all, you and I get to be together now!” She seemed truly, honestly shocked that I wasn’t scooping her off her feet and carrying her fireman-style back into my office to make passionate love to her.
She was delusional and arrogant to the core.
Same as she ever was.
“That. Is. Never. Going. To. Happen. Now fucking leave.”
Worry appeared, and I could see that Mariah was sensing there was a chance she might not get exactly what she wanted.
“Listen Gavin,” she said. “I know I…messed up back when we were younger. It wasn’t the right thing to do to lie about having your baby. But that’s all in the past. I’ve changed, darling. And I can’t wait for the chance to show you. Now, let’s put all this awful business with Gia behind us and-“
I shrugged my arm, hard enough to detach her hand.
“Wrong. You haven’t changed. I don’t know what you said exactly to Gia, but there isn’t a damn doubt in my mind that I was anything but the same Mean-Girls shit you pulled back in high school. Your behavior in the last twenty minutes has proved that you’re still the same arrogant, self-obsessed brat you’ve always been. And on top of that, you’re a fucking liar.”
She didn’t say a word, her eyes wide and her mouth in a shocked “O.”
So, I finished it up.
“Now, get the fuck out of my office before I call security and have them march you out. And don’t you ever even think about coming back.”
But Mariah didn’t budge an inch. Instead, her lip began to quiver and tears welled in the bottom lids of her eyes.
Oh, great – here come the fucking waterworks.
With that, she let loose. Mariah’s head hung back, and she started bawling like there was no tomorrow, sobs and wails filling the air.
Fucking hell.
I glanced over my shoulder, seeing Bess and Lori in the hallway watching the events unfold with expressions of concern. I shook my head and waved my hand, saying “Don’t worry about it – it’s nothing.”
The ladies gave apprehensive nods, watching the scene for another few seconds before ducking out of view.
If there was one thing Mariah had always had a natural flair for, it was getting attention.
“You…you don’t get it, Gavin!”
“What’s not to get? We’re done.”
She lifted her head, wet eyeliner trailing down her face in black streaks. The woman was a mess.
“But you don’t get it. I’m in real trouble!”
I needed to get to Gia, and I didn’t give a damn about what kind of trouble she was in.
“My…my last husband.” She didn’t wait for me to say anything to go on. “He was cruel to me. So cruel.”
“Cruel?”
“He’s worth millions but barely gave me anything. It was ridiculous! I had a lifestyle to keep up and how was I supposed to do that with the…the scraps he was giving me every month?”
I couldn’t imagine caring less about anything else.
Part of me wanted to take out my phone and try to call Gia right then and there. But I had a feeling she wouldn’t be too interested in talking to me.
“So, what else was I supposed to do?” Mariah was sobbing between words, her face getting all gross and snotty like a kid who’d just banged her knee. “I…talked to some people, borrowed some money.”
Despite how much I wanted her to get lost, this got my attention.
“You what?”
“I borrowed some money. Not a lot! Well, not at first.” She shook her head as she wiped her tears with the back of her hand. “I was sure I’d be getting more than enough in the divorce to pay it back. But I didn’t expect him to be so mean about it!”
“Wait, let me get this straight – you borrowed money from loan sharks and now you’re on the hook for money you can’t pay back?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Well, I could – Mariah had never been one to make responsible, or mature, decisions. Hell, she was the one who’d invented a fake pregnancy to get me into a real marriage.
But borrowing money from loan sharks?
“What the hell were you thinking?” I asked. “You ever heard of this thing called a credit card?”
“I maxed them all out,” she said, as if it were the most sensible thing in the world. “And these clothes don’t pay for themselves!” Mariah tugged at her velour shirt.
“I don’t have time for this.” I spoke as I stepped around her.
But Mariah wasn’t ready to let me go. She grabbed my sleeve, yanking part of my shirt untucked.
“No, you can’t just leave!” she cried, her eyes wide with fear, as if I were dooming her to a fate worse than death. “I’m getting nothing in the divorce. Gavin, you’re my only chance.”
I wasn’t in the mood. After yanking my arm away from her and re-tucking my shirt, I caught sight of Bess in the office. After pulling open the door, I stuck my head in and barked out a quick command.
“Call security and make sure she’s not here when I get back.”
Bess gave a sharp nod, her eyes slightly wide from the drama she was likely hearing all of through the office doors. When that was done, I turned and strode toward the elevator.
“Gavin…what – what are you doing?”
“None of your damn business.”
The expression of shock on her face made it clear that it was finally sinking in that she was totally fucked.
“But what about me? What am I supposed to do?”
I, I, I; me, me, me. There was one person Mariah gave a shit about.
And I was beyond tired of it.
“Not my problem,” I said, the elevator doors opening. I turned and looked her dead in the eye. “Go find yourself another sucker. Once was enough for me.”
The words came as a shock, and it took her a moment to compose herself. Then the doors closed, Mariah running toward them.
“No, wait!”
They shut with a chipper ding. And that was that.
My heart thudded at a steady, fast pace. Mariah had stolen valuable moments that could’ve made the difference between getting a chance to say my piece to Gia.
The elevator doors opened to the building lobby and I burst into a run, hauling ass and nearly slamming into a member of the maintenance staff.
Cold hit me as I stepped through the sliding glass front doors, and I didn’t waste any time scanning the parking lot for any sign of Gia. But the parking lot around the offices were huge – lots of places to check.
I broke out into a run, not giving a damn how it might look that the head doctor of the clinic was sprinting in a circle around the building, not even wearing a coat despite the freezing weather. Puffs of breath formed in the frigid air as I ran, the sky a solid, smoky gray above. Snow was piled up next to the sidewalk, and I had to run carefully to not slip on the ice.
When I reached the other side of the building, I spotted her. She was at the far end of the parking lot, but near enough that I could make out the sadness on her face. Gia, apparently just then finishing up a call, shoved her phone into her purse and opened her car door.
“Gia!”
Right at the moment I called out her name, a big truck with a growling engine drove past, its huge tires kicking up dirty snow all over my dress shoes, along with the
bottoms of my slacks. But my clothes were the last thing I cared about.
She didn’t hear me -or was ignoring me- as she ducked down into her car. I cupped my hands in front of her mouth and called her name again.
Nothing.
Her car pulled out of its spot, and there wasn’t any doubt in my mind I needed to follow her. I reached into my pocket and felt…nothing,
I glanced down, realizing that my keys were in my jacket and I’d left it in the office, along with my phone.
“Shit!”
The word came out in a sharp hiss as I turned to run back to the office. I glanced over my shoulder just in time to watch her car pull out of the lot and into traffic.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
The odds were getting slimmer by the second that I’d be able to get to her in time.
But I didn’t give a damn. I needed Gia like fucking crazy, and any odds, no matter how slim, were good enough for me. I hurried back into the building. Not wanting to bother with the elevator, I rushed up the stairs and was soon back in my office.
There was no sign of Mariah – one less thing to worry about.
Bess was at the front desk, her curious eyes on me as I ran down the hall toward my office.
“Dr. Davenport?” Her voice was tinged with curiosity – no doubt she’d never seen me that intense.
I hurried into my office and snatched my phone off my desk, pulling up Gia’s number and calling.
Each ring that sounded without her answering was like an ice-cold knife blade into my gut.
It went to voicemail. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d left a voicemail for non-business reasons, but I did it anyway.
“Gia, please call me. We need to talk about what happened, what you saw. It wasn’t what you think it was. Call me as soon as you get this.”
I winced as soon as I ended the call. “It wasn’t what you think it was?” That was the most cliché line imaginable – sitcom shit. But it was the truth. Gia had come in right at the moment Mariah had thrown herself at me. From Gia’s perspective, it no doubt looked like I was in the middle of something I hadn’t been.
I fired off a text and called one more time.
No response.
There was nothing else to do but try to speak to her in person. I threw on my coat and made damn sure I had my phone and keys this time, then hurried out of the office.
“I’m not available for the rest of the day,” I said to Bess as I hurried past.
“Got it. Good luck.” Her tone was professional but considerate, as if she knew I was in the middle of a total mess but wanted to give me some respectable distance.
I gave a pursed-lip smile in return, one to let her know I appreciated it.
Then I was out the door and back outside moments later, then behind the wheel of my car. I drove fast, my heart still racing.
And as I drove, a thought occurred to me. As fucking furious as I was with Mariah, at the very least her insane behavior had made me realize beyond a shadow of a doubt how deeply I felt toward Gia. It was much, much more than the simple lust I’d convinced myself it had been.
A red light illuminated at the intersection ahead, bringing me to a stop. I slammed the steering wheel in frustration.
All I could do was hope I hadn’t fucked it up for good.
Gia
The pain was so intense I could hardly bear it. As I neared my apartment it took all the restraint I had not to simply pull over and bawl my eyes out.
Gavin. That prick. That fucking prick. After all he’d done to me, after all he’d put me through, had decided to get back with Mariah of all people.
Or at least, to get back with her for long enough to screw in his office.
That’s what Mariah had said, at least. I went back and forth in my head, picturing Mariah’s face and getting pissed, then picturing Gavin’s face and experiencing a sadness I’d never known before.
It was all his fault. All the pain I’d been put through over the last month was because of him and his bullshit.
And the worst part? I should’ve known better. Gavin had shown me who he was back in high school when he’d dumped me for Mariah the first time. Years later and it was the same shit with the same person.
How could I have been so dumb?
But none of it with Gavin mattered. What did was my baby.
It was so strange. I was looking down the barrel of life as a single mother. And while I couldn’t know exactly what it would be like, there was no doubt it’d be hard as hell.
But I wasn’t scared. If anything, the idea of devoting my life to the baby, giving motherhood the best damn shot I could, made me feel…good.
Hopeful.
The feeling was intense enough that it pushed out thoughts of Mariah and Gavin and all that nonsense.
I had a baby to think about.
I couldn’t wait.
A small, determined smile formed on my lips. Making a turn, I pulled into the nearest parking lot and pulled into a spot. Once stopped, I took my phone out of my purse.
The tight feeling in my stomach returned when I saw multiple missed texts and calls from Gavin. The texts were all asking me to call him back, that he needed to explain, blah-blah-blah.
No dice. I’d learned my lesson with that shithead. Maybe, years down the road, if he managed to behave himself, I’d let him into the baby’s life.
But for now, he was out. I didn’t want to hear another word out of him, not a single one of his bullshit excuses. What more did I need to see than him in his office, Mariah, on the verge of pushing him onto the desk and riding the good doctor like a damn stallion?
He wanted her, then he could have her.
After clearing the texts and deleting the voicemails without bothering to listen to them, I brought up Google Maps and typed in “OBGYN near me.” A few results appeared, and I picked the one nearest to my apartment and gave it a call.
“Dr. Price’s office – how can I help you?” The woman’s voice on the other end was chipper and cheerful – almost enough to make me forget about the other experience at a doctor’s office I’d just had.
“Hi. I…” I realized I didn’t know where to begin. Sure, my situation was straight-forward; I was pregnant and needed to see a doctor. But speaking the words out loud made it all so real.
I took a deep breath and said it.
“I’m pregnant and need to see a doctor.”
“Of course! How far along are you?”
“I don’t know. This is actually the first I’m talking to a professional about it. And…I don’t know what to do.”
Saying the words made me realize how true they were. Ever since I’d left home after high school, I’d taken pride in being a woman who could do any damn thing I set my mind to. I’d put myself through college, I’d started my own business, I’d made a success out of myself.
When it came to the pregnancy, however, I was lost. And I’d be going through it alone, doing it all on my own.
“Sure!” She said it like there wasn’t anything strange in the slightest. “Well, my name’s Sierra – I’m the lead nurse here at Dr. Price’s clinic and I’m happy to help you out with whatever you need. And congratulations!”
Her calm and friendly attitude was exactly what I needed to hear. And when she said “congratulations” she actually sounded happy for me.
“Thanks, Sierra. So, what’s the first step? I feel so out of my depth here that I feel like I’m fumbling blind.”
“That’s about the most common reaction with new mothers-to-be. Don’t worry – the spot you’re in now is the exact same that millions and millions of women have felt before. And we’re here to help get you through it.”
The smile stayed on my face. “I really appreciate it.”
“First thing to do is set you up for an appointment. I’m guessing you took an at-home pregnancy test?”
“That’s right – one of those digital ones.”
“Perfect. First order of business will be confirming
the pregnancy and seeing how far along you are. From there, we’ll be able to answer any questions you might have.”
“I’ll make a list, because I’ve got a ton.”
“It’s what we’re here for. Now, let me take a look…how does New Year’s Eve sound? Looks like we could get you in at nine AM if that works for you.”
I took out a note pad and pen and quickly jotted it all down.
“That’s perfect.”
“Great! Then we’ll see you then.”
“Um, hold on.”
“Sure! What’s up?”
“I know this might sound weird, but is there anything I can do now? Like some way to prepare?”
“Best thing you can do now is to relax the best you can. I know the holidays can be crazy, but the calmer and more relaxed you are, the better it is for baby.”
“Calm and relaxed.” They were two words that a small business owner like myself never described myself with. But I was going to have to learn. “Got it.”
“And if you want to really get a leg up, there’s this book called What to Expect When You’re Expecting.”
“Oh! I’ve heard of that one!” I said the words with almost childlike enthusiasm.
She chuckled. “You’ve heard of it because it’s one of the best. It’ll give a month-by-month playbook on all the stuff you’ll be going through as a mom-to-be. Just about anything you’ll be wondering about will be in there.”
I scrawled down the name.
“Anything else?”
“That should get you on your way. And if you have other questions, please feel free to call.”
She asked for my information and all the rest she’d been to set up the appointment. And by the time she let me go with one last eager congratulations, I didn’t simply feel better, I felt good.
I felt ready.
I pulled up the location for the nearest Barnes and Noble and drove over. Once inside and among the quiet, mellow ambience, I scanned the racks for the book.
And as I did, I strolled past the kid’s book section, watching a little girl about five or so with her mother. One of her tiny, gloved hands was in her mom’s, the other eagerly pointing to whatever she wanted on the shelf.
That was me. Or, at least, it would be.