“So anyway, when it came time for her to get engaged, she tried to end things between us. But it never worked. We always found our way back to each other. It was so hard to know that her heart belonged to me. I begged her to call it off, to be with me. I was willing to marry her if that’s what it took, but she knew that she’d get shunned from her family and she felt that she couldn’t lose them.”
His tone was almost bitter, like he resented the families involved. I supposed I would have too.
“Anyway, after they got married, her husband moved them back to India. I think he knew something was going on. We had one last night together, and I haven’t seen her in over six months. If she was to show up here, right now, I’d go to her in a heartbeat.”
By the end of his story he looked worn and defeated, and I swiped the tear that slipped down my cheek as I sniffled.
“I know that feeling you two share,” he continued with a firm voice. “You’ll always find your way back to each other because no one else can compare. And Drayton hates me—I know that because I hated Priya’s husband. A lot. But I wouldn’t want to come between what you have.” He rested his hand on my knee. “Don’t lose it. Make it work.”
“I don’t know if it’s that easy.”
“Because of the distance?”
“That,” I confirmed with a small sob. “And his reputation. My inability to trust men. The fact that my feelings for him overwhelm me doesn’t help. It sort of scares me.”
“Communicate. Talk it over and figure out what it is that you both want. You’ll never get anywhere if you don’t.”
The thought of telling Drayton just how much I cared about him scared me, even if what Cooper said was logical. I wasn’t used to being so vulnerable and exposed. “I really am sorry for messing you around.” I gently dabbed at the teardrops on my cheeks so that I didn’t ruin my makeup too much. “You deserve a lot better than someone who’s hung up on another guy.”
“Like I already said, don’t worry about it.” He stood up and offered me his hand, pulling me to my feet with ease. “Would it be horrible if I said that I was kind of using you too? Trying to get over Priya?”
“That actually makes me feel better.”
We both laughed and a sense of relief washed over me. Cooper said, “Look, I’m going to head home. I’ll stop at your place and grab my things first.”
“I’ll come with you.” I started down the concrete steps but was intercepted by his tall frame.
“Please stay. Salvage the rest of your homecoming dance, okay? Talk to Drayton. It’s fine—I’m sure that your brother will be more than happy to see me out.”
I groaned. “I’ll call him and tell him to ease up.”
I waited with Cooper while he ordered an Uber, the conversation taking a less heavy turn as we discussed idle topics. I promised that when I moved to California, I’d seek him out as a new friend so that I didn’t have to battle being a first year alone. Things felt like they were in a good place when the Uber pulled away, and he gave me a small wave from the passenger window.
“Where have you been?” Gabby asked as I walked back into the gym. She and Josh were huddled by the punch bowl.
I didn’t immediately offer an answer because I was too busy scanning the area in hopes of finding my quarterback. Cooper was right—we should at least have a conversation about what that kiss meant. Did he want to be more than friends? Did he just want something physical? I wished I knew but it was so hard to tell with him.
“Is that a hickey?” Gabby shrieked.
A slapping noise sounded as I brought my hand to my neck, covering the spot where Drayton had been devouring me not more than twenty minutes earlier. Josh and Gabby watched me while I stuttered to come up with some excuse that they wouldn’t believe for even a moment.
“Were you and Cooper getting in a little quickie action in the janitor’s closet?”
“I don’t know a single person who’d screw in the janitor’s closet. Have you been in there? It stinks, it’s cramped, and it’s full of cleaning supplies. We have locker rooms or classrooms that’d work far better.”
Gabby rolled her eyes but what caught my attention was Josh, who was staring at me with an accusatory glare. “Drayton just came through here not too long ago.” He pointed at me with a calculating grin. “He looked all scruffy and undone.”
“Where is Cooper?!” Gabby sucked all of the oxygen out of the room.
“He … He—he left. He went home.”
I explained the entire situation from beginning to end because honestly, I wanted to talk about it more. I didn’t think I’d entirely recovered from the mind-blowing session. My best friend was many things—loyal, hilarious, tech savvy—but she wasn’t calm, and news that thrilled her, killed her. She was doing her best not to burst into an ear-piercing scream, which I appreciated, because they did my head in.
“What does this mean for you both?” She stepped forward and folded my hand between her own. “Are you going to tell him how you feel?”
“I think I have to,” I told her, taking a moment to sweep the room for the millionth time. “I suppose I’ll have to find him first.”
“He disappeared pretty quickly,” Josh informed us. He pulled his cell phone out of his suit pocket and tapped the screen with his thumbs. “I’ll call him.”
“Hey, man, we’re looking for you? Where’d you go?”
Josh listened for the response. He turned around and lowered his voice, which only prompted me to step forward so I could hear what was being said.
“Why can’t I tell her?” he asked in a hushed tone. “She wants to talk to you about something, bro. Just come back.”
Josh’s shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath as he ran his hand through his hair. The conversation wasn’t giving me a very positive vibe and my stomach sank when he ended the phone call, turning around with an apologetic look etched on his face.
“He … He wasn’t feeling well.” Josh gave me a tight smile.
He was lying, I knew. And he knew that I knew. The urge to press for details simmered under my tongue. But I didn’t want to put him in an uncomfortable position, so I kept my mouth shut, reduced to a feeling of utter disappointment.
“Excuse me, babe.” Gabby folded her arms with a pointed glare. “Tell us what he said.”
“Please don’t make me,” Josh pleaded. “You know that I love you, but respect the Bro Code.”
“I will do no such thing,” she bit back. “My best friend wants to talk to that idiot and you bett—”
“Gabs, stop,” I cut her off, placing an arm on her shoulder. I appreciated the fierce instinct to get the information that I so desperately wanted to hear, but I would rather not get between her and her boyfriend or him and his best friend. “I don’t need to know. I’ll just—I’ll talk to him on Monday.”
“No! What if something happens in that time? Like, what if he has to move across the country? What if your feelings go away or you change your mind!”
“I didn’t talk to Drayton for an entire month and the moment that he approached me, we were eating each other’s faces,” I said sarcastically. “I don’t think another day is going to change the way I feel.”
“I suppose,” she pouted defiantly. “You know how long I’ve been waiting for you to realize this though, right? Now I have to wait even longer. It sucks.”
Deep down I shared her feelings. It wasn’t like I’d planned on running into his arms and declaring my undying love, but a simple confession that yes, I did have feelings for him, and, yes, it was scaring me, and I wasn’t sure exactly what to do with this new, or not so new, revelation, was more of the approach I’d been planning.
My dress was draped over the end of my bed. There was a small gap in the curtains that allowed the dim light to peep through. This morning felt colder. I reached out and snatched my cell phone from the side-table drawer before I snuggled deeper under the comforter. There were no new messages from Drayton. He hadn’t responded t
o the one that I sent him last night. I hadn’t wanted to overdo it, so I kept it simple.
Hey. Cooper’s gone home. I just thought that we could talk. Let me know when you get time?
It was ten in the morning and there was a definite urge to send him another message. But I resisted and leaped out of bed, leaving the phone behind so that it was out of sight but, unfortunately, not out of mind. Sort of like last night’s kiss. I touched the wall as I wandered down the hall toward the living room. I felt like I needed to ground myself whenever I remembered what it was like experiencing the best kiss that I’d ever felt before. Feelings made a hell of a difference during a lip-lock.
“Morning, kid,” Nathan mumbled from the couch where he was sprawled with the remote in his hand and his boxer shorts on. Sunday.
I waved lazily and wandered into the kitchen in search of coffee. I realized that I should have put on something warmer before I left my bedroom. Little shorts and a tank top didn’t protect a whole lot from the midmorning chill. But my robe was so far away. I’d deal for now.
“So,” Nathan called while I poured milk into a cup. “Carter packed up and left lightning fast last night. What happened there?”
“His name is Cooper,” I sighed. “And nothing happened. That you need to know about.”
“He hurt you? I’ll shiv him.”
“Relax,” I slid the coffee jar back into its spot beside the microwave and picked up the hot coffee. “I was the one who hurt him. Sort of.”
Nathan watched me with confusion as I walked in and sat down on the single seater beside the sofa. I took a sip and he sat up. “Wait. What the hell happened?”
“And men call women gossipers. Look at you. Desperate for the details.”
“I need to know,” he defended himself. “You’re my little sister. It’s a matter of protection and all of that.”
“I kissed someone else at the dance and he saw it,” I groaned. “Okay?”
“Wow. What a coldhearted witch. After he came all that wa—”
“Nathan.” I threw a cushion at him—being cautious not to spill the coffee—and he laughed.
“I’m kidding, who was it? The quarterback, I bet.”
“It was.”
He gasped. “It was?”
“Enough.”
He was mocking me now, gasping and covering his mouth as if he were a thirteen-year-old gossip queen as he walked over to the side table beside the door. “Mail,” he tossed me an envelope and sat down again.
“When did this arrive?” I placed the coffee on the floor beside the chair. I turned the envelope over and almost choked on air. “Nathan! It’s from CalArts.”
Paper tore. My heart pounded and the words were almost a blur while I attempted to read each line. Nathan stood in front of me while I mumbled under my breath.
“I got an audition!”
We both screamed. Well, I screamed. Nathan shouted with a deep voice but total enthusiasm. I stood up and we hugged while I bounced up and down. It couldn’t have come at a better time. This was a blessing—the perfect way to lift my spirits and remind me of what was important—my goals and dreams.
“So proud of you, kid.” Nathan held me at arm’s length and smiled an enormous smile full of pride. “California here we come, huh?”
“It says the audition is December 17.” I read the letter again. The paper trembled in my hand. It was going to be framed. “That’s a month and a half from now.”
“You’re sorted.” Nathan shrugged. “You’ve been practicing the routine tons, right? It’s that one to the song ‘I Get To Love You’. By Ruelle.”
“That’s the one.” I folded the paper and inhaled a deep breath. “But it has to be perfect. Perfect.”
He gave me a nudge in the shoulder. “It will be. You’re talented as hell. You’ve got this.”
My dream was closer. I hadn’t heard back from the other two colleges, but the fact that my dream school had allowed me an audition was surreal. Nathan sighed and picked up the television remote. “I have a date later. I should get sorted.”
“Another one,” I mumbled with mild distaste. I was still reading the letter over and over again. “Is this a repeat date or another newbie?”
“Her name is Alana.” He grinned. “She’s a new teacher’s aide at the junior high. That’s all I need to know.”
It would have been nice if he’d suggested that we go out for a celebratory meal or at the least had a beer together. Whatever. It was what it was. I’d almost forgotten that I had a coffee. So I picked it up—still clutching the letter—and sipped it while Nathan flicked through the television channels. We’d just sort of come to a standstill in the living room, as if moving or sitting back down could shatter this dream state that we were in.
But when I heard the sound of a motorcycle engine tearing up the road, becoming louder and louder, we both looked at each other and I felt as if my stomach was in my throat.
“Give me that.” Nathan took the coffee cup and we continued listening as the noise slowed down outside and then stopped. “One guess who that is.”
“I’m not prepared.” I swallowed.
“Prepared for what?”
Nathan didn’t know the entire series of events from last night. Such as Drayton disappearing and making zero contact after we’d almost had sex on the side of a building.
After another moment of quiet—save for the thumping in my chest and ears—there was a knock on the door. There was no reason to be so panicked. This was what I’d wanted. I wanted to see him and talk to him. But it was the thought of admitting how I felt that was making me a bundle of nerves. I had never been such a mess around men before. I didn’t like it.
Nathan headed toward the front door. I stood where I was and watched as he opened it and revealed Drayton. He was wearing a fitted pair of sweats and a hoodie. It was effortless and perfect on his muscular build. His hair was tousled from his helmet, and he nodded a polite greeting at Nathan.
“How’s it going?” Nathan shook Drayton’s hand and pointed a thumb over his shoulder. “Dallas, it’s for you.”
Funny bastard.
Drayton looked past Nathan, who beelined for the corridor, and found me standing in the middle of the room.
“Cute pj’s.”
“I got an audition.” I held the letter up. “At CalArts. I got an audition.”
His entire expression brightened as he stepped inside and closed the door. “Fuck yeah.” He beamed pure elation. His excitement was sincere. “That’s—that’s so damn good. Knew you could do it.”
He was in front of me now, his arms flinched, and it seemed as if he wanted to give me a hug. He must have decided that it was necessary in his congratulations because he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in tight. It was intoxicating. His firm arms and chest. I was in far deeper than I’d thought. He let me go and while there was an abundance of unresolved tension between us, it didn’t feel awkward. It felt right.
“I’m sorry about last night.” He slipped his hands into his pockets. “Not about the kiss. I can’t even think about that kiss when I’m in public.”
I laughed. It was strangled and weird. But I laughed.
“But about after.” He shrugged a shoulder. “Can we go and talk? Please?”
I smiled. “Sure. Let me get changed first.”
“Wrap up,” he called after me. “It’s cold out.”
He was right. It was cold out. I was wearing a pair of faded blue jeans, a cute turtleneck sweater, and a pair of knock-off Doc Martens, and I still shivered when we stepped outside. I followed him toward his motorcycle and noticed that there were two helmets resting on the seat. One of them was smaller. It was sleek, a glossy black with a clear face guard. It looked brand new.
“That’s yours.” He pointed at the helmet, then picked up his own.
“Mine?”
“Yeah. I was almost here and I realized that we can’t ride around with one helmet in the middle of the day.”
&nb
sp; “So it’s mine? As in, I can keep it?”
“You seem confused.”
He pulled his helmet on, still watching me with the visor up while he laughed. I shut up because I didn’t want to keep repeating myself. But it was a little bit startling that he would go and purchase a brand-new helmet for me. How often did he plan on having me on the back of this thing? My heart jumped a beat.
When we arrived at Rock Park, the same place that we’d come the first time we rode together, we left the motorcycle in the parking lot, which was no longer vacant, and walked the trail.
There were more people than just us there. It was a popular spot but it wasn’t overcrowded. We walked. Small talk passed between us. And then we came to a trail that had a chain and sign across the path. It warned that it wasn’t open to public thoroughfare. But of course, I wasn’t surprised when Drayton swung his leg over the chain and gestured for me to follow him down the small, narrow path flanked by two tall thin sheds holding supplies for park rangers. It wasn’t long before the shrubs and bush parted in a small clearing. A clearing so small it was almost the edge of the cliff. There was just enough room for us both to sit with our legs out in front of us.
“You wanted to talk.” He leaned back on his hands and gave me a side-on glance.
“So did you.”
“You first.” He nodded at me. “Unless I can guess. You don’t think that we should kiss again. It was a mistake. Etcetera, etcetera.”
“No,” I scoffed. “I like you. More than I want to. I want to kiss you again. And more. You’re an idiot, but apparently I’m super into it because … because I really, really like you.”
I was afraid to turn and look at him. My fears could be realized—he might be interested in something physical only. He might have changed his mind entirely after last night. All I knew was that my heart was hammering and I was nervous about what was to come next.
The QB Bad Boy and Me Page 20