An Agreement (Summer in New York Book 3)

by Lindsay Marie Miller

  I sighed and set the knife down I’d been using to cut the okra. “I don’t really want to talk about it.”

  She looked up at me, surprised. “That’s okay. We don’t have to.”

  I felt bad about ignoring her question. But I wasn’t ready to go there yet. Not even with her.

  When everything was ready, we sat down at the table to eat. I opened a bottle of wine and lit a candle. Bailey glowed across from me, catching my eye. She’d been sweet all night, a little more relaxed than before. It made me feel good, knowing that I’d helped her in some small way.

  “So who else is in the running?” I asked.

  “Hmm?”

  “To win your heart?” I finished my wine and poured another glass.

  No matter how much I craved her company, it wouldn’t last forever. She was just here to learn what she could about men to help her find one. She wasn’t here for me.

  She swallowed. “Umm... I don’t know. I haven’t really—”

  “But don’t you get matched with guys? I mean, isn’t that how the whole online dating thing works?’

  She set her fork down and lowered her head. “Yeah. I guess so.”

  “And who have you been talking to lately?” I was being rude. I could hear myself. Like I was watching it unfold from a distance. And I sounded like a jerk.

  “No one.” She met my eyes, and I saw how confused she looked.

  “How come?”

  “Because I’ve been spending time with you.”

  I held her gaze. She was too innocent, too sweet to waste her time with someone like me.

  “I mean, you’ve been teaching me all the things I need to know.” She stabbed a chunk of okra. “I thought I’d be better off learning everything I can before I get back out there.”

  “Yeah.” I wiped my mouth and got up, taking my plate to the sink.

  I was loud and abrupt. It might have even scared her. I was such an asshole.

  And that was the reason why she needed to stay away from me.

  “Carter.” I felt her presence behind me. “Is something wrong?”

  I filled the sink with water and dishwashing liquid. Then I dropped my plate.

  “Do you want me to go?” she murmured, her voice so soft I almost didn’t hear her.

  I shut my eyes and dried my hands off with a towel. “No, Bailey. I don’t want you to go.”

  When I turned around, she took a step back. Her eyes were searching, careful, uncertain. I’d made her feel vulnerable and defensive in the same night. Her walls were back up again. So were mine.

  I grabbed a beer from the fridge and used a bottle opener for the lid. Then I took a sip and gazed at her. “I just don’t want you to end up with some jerk.” I sat down on the couch. “With someone like me.”

  “If you’re trying to scare me away, it’s not going to work.”

  I picked up the remote and turned on the TV.

  “And if you’re trying to blow me off, that’s not going to work either.”

  I couldn’t help but grin as she plopped down beside me. She took the remote out of my hand, and I didn’t fight her. Because I deserved it.

  “Let’s see. This should be fun.”

  I rolled my eyes as she channel surfed. I kept thinking she was going to force me to sit through a chick flick or some drama-infused episode of reality TV. So I was surprised when she left it on an episode of Miami Vice.

  “That’s not so bad.”

  She smirked and stared me down.

  “What?”

  “Some popcorn would be nice,” she said.

  I chuckled and got up to make some. When the popcorn was ready, I poured it into a huge bowl and then handed it to her on the couch. She smiled as I sat down beside her, eating her first handful.

  “Well.” I slid my arm behind her on the couch. “How is it?”

  “Good.” She grabbed another mouthful. “I love butter on my popcorn.”

  “Me too.” I reached into the bowl and our fingers brushed. It made her stop and stare.

  “How are we doing with the whole getting close to a man thing?”

  She turned her head, and I felt her breath. “Better.”

  “I’m glad.”

  “The only guy I feel comfortable around is you,” she whispered.

  I stroked her arm and felt how difficult dating was for her. It made no sense. She was everything any man with a brain could ever hope for. And I was already jealous of the guy who won her heart in the end. Because there was no way she’d ever fall for someone like me.

  “What about this morning at the gym?” I asked.

  “I’m sorry about that. It’s just kind of a knee jerk reaction.”

  “It’s okay.” I cupped her cheek in my hand. “Hey, don’t ever feel like you need to apologize for that. And if a guy ever expects you to, run.”

  She giggled, looking at me with dreamy blue eyes. Her dimples were showing. And they were adorable.

  “I can’t thank you enough,” she said, “for helping me with all of this. It was probably a strange request.”

  “What?”

  “Help me figure out how to attract a man,” she joked, making fun of herself.

  “I don’t think you’ll have a problem,” I said. “You probably didn’t really need my help anyway. I just—” I caught myself, knowing I was about to say something I shouldn’t. But I couldn’t hold back. I didn’t want to anymore. “I like spending time with you.”

  She scooted closer to me on the couch. “I like spending time with you, too.”

  I couldn’t offer her a relationship. Not when she found out who I was, what I’d done. Bailey Lewis would never want a future with me. But I didn’t want to give her up. Not yet.

  “Well then, let’s make sure we always do.” I stuck my hand out. “Deal?”

  She bit her lip and then shook my hand. “Deal.” There was a sparkle in her eye.

  By the end of the night, Bailey fell asleep on the couch. I laughed quietly and kept watching TV. She looked tired, but she was so darn cute when she slept. I might have even liked it.

  Slowly but surely, her head ended up on my chest. I didn’t know what to do at first. But her hair smelled good, and her skin was so soft. I touched her cheek and ran my fingers through her hair, worried that I might wake her. She mumbled in her sleep and wrapped her arms around me.

  And I did like it. Maybe a little too much.

  I put the remote down and tried to get out from under her, so she could sleep. But Bailey had an iron grip. Instead of getting off the couch, I ended up lying down. She put her hand on my stomach and lay against me. I bit my tongue when she started to snore and then I wrapped my arm around her.

  There was a blanket on the back of the couch from when Beth had stayed with me. I always offered her my bed, but she liked sleeping on the couch. So this blanket was mainly for her sisterly visits. But it was coming in handy now.

  I grabbed the blanket and draped it over Bailey. She squirmed for a second and then put her cheek against my chest. I touched her hair and rubbed her back, wanting to comfort her, protect her, cherish her.

  As she drifted off, I thought about how amazing it would be if she were mine.

  I may have even fallen in love with her right then.

  Just from watching her sleep.

  Chapter 6

  Bailey

  I woke up feeling more rested than I had in months. My cheek was pressed against something hard. And it wasn’t until I tried to sit up that I realized I’d slept on top of Carter. All night long.

  “Oh my God.”

  He roused awake and we butted heads.

  “Ow.” I touched my forehead as he winced beneath me.

  It must have been the early hours of dawn. But it felt like I’d gotten a full ten hours in.

  “I’m sorry.” I eased off him and sat down on the couch.

  “It’s my fault.” He stood with a grunt. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah.” I closed my eyes, trying to
make the pain go away. “I think so.”

  He disappeared down the hall while I grabbed an ice pack from the freezer. I made one for him too and then lay back down on the couch. When he returned, I handed it over and he sat down, putting my feet in his lap.

  “I’m sorry about last night,” I said. “I didn’t mean to crash here.”

  “That’s all right.” He rubbed my ankles. “You can stay here anytime.”

  He looked into my eyes, and I was red all over. But then I gasped and jumped up.

  “What is it?” he asked.

  “I’m going to be late for work.” I found my shoes and grabbed my purse. “I’m so sorry but I have to run.”

  “It’s okay.” He took my ice pack and walked me to the door. “What are you doing later?”

  I ran my fingers through my hair and grinned. “Umm... working,” I giggled.

  “Yes, I know that.” He brushed my hair back when it kept falling in my face. “I thought we could grab coffee. I wanted to tell you something.”

  Hope blossomed inside me. Maybe he’d been thinking the same thing, too.

  “Okay. I can meet you on my lunch break.”

  “Perfect.” He opened the door and kissed my cheek. “I’ll see you soon.”

  I bit my lip and smiled, not brave enough to kiss him back. If I had, it wouldn’t have been on the cheek.

  All morning, I felt like a bee at work. Buzzing here and there. Everything came easy. And even when there were problems, I tackled them head on. Because I knew what was happening soon.

  I took an early lunch at 11:30 so I could meet Carter. For the past two hours, I’d been preparing myself with what to say. It was time to tell him the truth. That I was crazy about him. And that I didn’t want to keep going on dates, looking for the right guy. Because I’d already found him.

  He’d been giving me signals. Always wanting to see me again. Kisses on the cheek.

  I couldn’t be wrong. He was going to tell me the same thing. That he wanted to be with me.

  Not as a friend or an advisor on men. He wanted to be my man. Just as badly as I wanted him to.

  When I made it to the coffee shop, he already had a table. He got up to give me a hug and then handed me my order. I offered to pay for mine, but he wouldn’t let me. Another clue to where this was headed.

  “How is work?” he asked, taking a sip of black coffee.

  “Great,” I smiled. “I’ve already gotten a lot done today.”

  “I’m glad. And your head?”

  “I guess it’s all right.” I brushed my fingertips over my forehead. “Do you see a bump?”

  “No,” he shook his head. “I think you’ll be fine.”

  He hadn’t suffered any bruises either, which was a relief.

  “So what did you want to tell me?” I asked.

  My heart was pounding. My cheeks were on fire. It was finally happening. What I’d wanted all along.

  “I’ve told you a lot about men. And it’s not like you ever really needed my help anyway. You were already perfect to begin with.”

  I swallowed, hanging on his every word. I wanted to scream and cry all at once.

  “So I think you’re ready.” He kept a straight face.

  “Ready for what?”

  “To get back out there and start dating again.” He drank his coffee in silence.

  “Oh.” I looked down at my cup of tea, feeling so crushed. It almost made me sick.

  “I was thinking we could go through your matches. And I’ll help you pick the good ones.”

  “Oh.” I wrapped my hands around my cup. It was warm. And I was falling apart on the inside.

  “Are you okay?” He watched me. I felt his eyes searching my face.

  “Yeah.” I got out my phone and pulled up my matches. Then I handed it over.

  Carter took my phone and scrolled through them. I sat there staring at his big strong hands with my head down. I’d been wrong all day. Which proved my point. I knew nothing about men.

  “How about this guy?” He showed me a face and read his personality traits. But I wasn’t listening.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know.”

  He sighed and kept scrolling. It took everything I could not to cry in front of him. His deft fingers flipping through profiles on the touch screen. Just seconds ago, I’d been dreaming about his hands all over me.

  “Stay away from this one.” He showed me a photo. I pretended to look at it. “Don’t ever date a guy with a backwards cap. In fact, if you see one, run for the hills.” He smiled and put my phone down.

  I rested my face in my hands and looked out at the street.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “If you don’t want to see me anymore, then why don’t you just come out and say it?”

  “Who the hell said that?” He was staring at me now. But it didn’t matter.

  “It’s clear that you’re done mentoring me on the ways of men.” I grabbed my phone and put it in my purse. “And maybe you’ve met someone. Some other woman you’d rather spend your time with.”

  “Okay, now you’re just making things up.”

  I stood up. “Thanks for the tea. And everything else.”

  He jumped out of his chair the minute I walked away. Then he was right beside me. “What’s going on?”

  “You tell me.” I put my sunglasses on so he couldn’t see the tears in my eyes.

  He grabbed my arm and pulled me aside. “Why would you think I don’t want to see you anymore?”

  “There was something I was planning on telling you today, too.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, let’s hear it.”

  I took off my sunglasses, because it felt wrong to not look him in the eye.

  “We’ve been spending a lot of time together. And you’ve been a great friend.”

  He had his eyes narrowed. And he was smoldering at me. “Keep going.”

  “But I have feelings for you. I thought today, you were planning on telling me that you feel the same way.” I watched his face. Rigid as stone. “But you’re never going to want me like that.”

  “Bailey.” He took a step closer. “That’s not true.”

  “Don’t say that to make me feel better. I could never have someone like you.”

  “What are you talking about?” He took my face in his hands. “You are every man’s fantasy.”

  I looked up at him, knowing he could see the tears in my eyes. “Except for yours.”

  “I’m not good enough for you,” he said.

  “Don’t try to be nice.” I pulled away. “I know what that really means.”

  “Bailey, I’m telling you the truth. You don’t know anything about my past.”

  “We all have a past Carter!” I held back a sob. “All that matters is the future.”

  I turned on my heel to make a run for it. But he jumped in front of me before I could escape.

  “I would still like to see you, Bailey. Why can’t we be friends?”

  “What are the chances of our friendship turning into something more?” I asked.

  He gritted his teeth and looked away, scratching his head.

  “That’s what I thought.”

  “Look.” He grabbed my wrist. “I’m not the right guy for you.”

  “Did you forget what you taught me? If a guy wants you, he won’t even hesitate.”

  He swallowed.

  “I don’t want to see you anymore, Carter. It’s too painful.”

  “Okay.” He furrowed his brow. “I’m sorry.”

  Tears were running down my face, so I put my sunglasses back on.

  “I never wanted to hurt you,” he said.

  “Yeah, well. I didn’t plan on getting my heart broken.”

  I walked away from him and went back to work. Then I went to the bathroom and cried. Michelle found me when I hadn’t shown my face for more than fifteen minutes. Maybe because it was something I’d never done before.

  “Hey, are you
okay?”

  I saw her in the mirror and dried my eyes. “Yeah. Guy trouble.”

  “I’m sorry.” She closed the door and came inside. “Anything I can do to help?”

  Michelle was four years younger than me. Not only was she pretty. She was confident about it. I’d even been a little jealous of her once. Her ability to draw men in and out of her life as she pleased.

  “Maybe so. Has a guy ever friend zoned you before?”

  “Yes.” She rolled her eyes. “I’ve had that happen lots of times.”

  “What do you do about it?” I asked.

  “Date somebody else. Preferably one of his hot guy friends.”

  “And then what happens?”

  “It’s like a litmus test.” She checked her appearance in the mirror beside me. “If he’s not into you, he won’t even notice. Or care. But if he likes you, even a little bit, it will drive him crazy.”

  I wasn’t sure if I could do that. Carter had never introduced me to any of his friends.

  “But I want a guy to like me on his own. Not out of jealousy.” I washed my hands in the sink. “I’m not going to be the shiny new toy that he wants only because it belongs to someone else.”

  “I hate to say this.” She patted my arm. “But maybe he’s not the one.”

  “And what do you do when that happens?”

  “Move on.” She lowered her voice. “Preferably with one of his hot guy friends.”

  “Thanks, Michelle.”

  “I’ve had my heart broken enough,” she said. “If he puts you through hell, he’s usually not worth it.”

  I nodded and dried my hands off, ready to get back to work. I wanted to clear Carter from my mind and have a productive day. Michelle told me we had a shipment in from Europe. They were expensive fabrics imported from Italy. And I’d chosen them for a new line of skirts I was making.

  Excited about something of my own creation, I ran out front and opened the box. They were beautiful, worth every dime. And that was the moment I realized that, without Carter Boudreaux in my life, I’d be just fine.

  THE NEXT TWO WEEKS flew by. I busied myself with work and tried not to think about him. But I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t hard or that I didn’t miss him. Since we’d last spoken, he hadn’t reached out to me once in an attempt to patch things up. Which told me everything I needed to know.