As family outings go, I’d say that it turns out to be a reasonable success. There are no full-on arguments. No bloodshed. Lucas only moans a bit – well, quite a bit. Shelby wears a flat cap and sunglasses, so is only recognised twice. I can hear Lucas grinding his teeth as Shelby poses for smiling selfies with his fans, but it doesn’t last for long and Lucas seems to get over it quickly. To entertain us, Shelby tells some funny stories about the panto rehearsals as we stroll the entire way round the quarry and Lucas even laughs at some of them. It sounds as if Shelby is having a ball and this is the most relaxed I’ve seen them together for a long time.
After our walk, we stop for tea and cake in the café which is all dressed up for Christmas and the waitresses are wearing elf hats. They even have a vegan Victoria sponge, so Lucas can’t complain about that either. Shelby and I go seasonal with mince pies – recklessly non-vegan. A few hours later, as the sun is sinking in the sky and there’s a fresh nip in the air, we walk home, muddy but happy.
Shelby stops at his car and, with a kiss, says, ‘I’ll send Ken for you later. About seven-thirty?’
‘Sounds ideal. Do I dress up?’
Shelby thinks for a moment. ‘Yes. I think you should.’
So I assume we’re going out somewhere fancy when, in truth, I’d rather the three of us were staying in together with a soya mince spag bol.
I put the dogs in the barn as they’re not allowed in the caravan when they’re up to the eyeballs in mud. I could hose them down, but I’m sure Bev will do it for me later if I ask nicely. Lucas and I kick off our boots at the door.
‘How was that?’ Bev asks when we’re back inside.
‘A trial,’ Lucas says. ‘I’m going to play Fortnite.’ He disappears into his bedroom and closes the door firmly.
‘Was it?’ Bev asks as her eyes follow him.
‘No. It was fine. They got on quite well. Though it would kill Lucas to admit it.’
She tuts. ‘It’s such a shame they rarely see eye-to-eye.’
I can’t help but agree. ‘I hope that one day they’ll appreciate each other more.’
‘I’m sure they will.’
Until then I’ll just try to keep the peace between them as best I can.
‘Want me to sort the dogs out later?’ Bev says.
‘You might regret offering. They’re all filthy dirty and holed up in the barn.’
She laughs. ‘I don’t mind.’
‘You’re an angel,’ I tell her.
‘I am. A fallen one.’ She winks at me. ‘I’ll make us a cuppa and then you’d better go and get ready for your date night.’
‘I feel quite nervous about it,’ I admit. ‘Do you know where we’re going?’
‘Of course I do, but like I’m going to tell you. Duh!’
‘Spoilsport.’
‘It’ll be nice. Relax. He’s your bloody boyfriend. Why are you getting all angsty, woman?’
It’s a good question and I don’t know why.
Bev sees to my tea needs and then lowers her voice as we drink. ‘Have you seen anything of Lucas’s girlfriend-not-girlfriend? What was her name?’
‘Aurora.’ I shake my head. ‘No. He hasn’t mentioned her and she certainly hasn’t been here.’
‘Wonder if it’s all off?’
‘I don’t know. He still spends hours on his phone and he doesn’t seem to have been upset or anything,’ I point out. ‘No more than usual, anyway.’
‘Fingers crossed that it’s all going smoothly.’
‘Yeah,’ I agree. But then I start wondering if everything really is OK.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The dogs are hosed down and tucked up in the caravan for the night. They’re also slightly surprised that I’m going out again. They’re not the only ones.
‘I won’t be late,’ I promise Lucas as I get ready to leave. A well-worn phrase.
‘You might be late,’ Bev says. ‘You never know your luck.’
She looks very smug.
‘What have you been plotting?’ I turn to Lucas. ‘Are you in on this?’
‘Don’t look at me,’ he says. ‘I’m only ever told anything on a need-to-know basis. I guess I’ll see you when I see you.’
He disappears back into his bedroom.
‘Thank you,’ I say to Bev. ‘I’m very grateful to you.’
‘My pleasure. Alan’s coming over in a short while so I’m not going to have to rely on Lucas for sparkling company.’ She throws a nod towards his closed bedroom door.
‘He loves you really.’
‘I know. He’s a good kid.’ The dogs start to bark and she grabs me by the shoulders and turns me round to face the door. ‘That’s Ken at the gate. Have a good time.’
‘You’ll call me if anything goes wrong?’
‘I won’t,’ Bev says. ‘All you have to think of tonight is you and Shelby. Off you go. He’s waiting.’
So I climb into Shelby’s car and Ken drives us smoothly through the lanes until a few minutes later we’re arriving at Homewood Manor. The house looks as if it is all in darkness, so Shelby must be ready for us to collect him.
Ken pulls up outside and comes round to open my door.
‘Are we going anywhere else?’
‘I’ll leave that for Shelby to explain,’ he says, mysteriously.
So I get out and walk to the front door, which is bearing a huge holly wreath, over-loaded with shiny red berries. As I get to the door, it swings open. There’s a butler standing there in full livery. I’m so shocked that I just gape at him. My heart sinks a little bit. I really hope that Shelby hasn’t organised some kind of chi-chi party without telling me and there’s a houseful of posh people who I don’t know.
‘Come in, madam,’ he says when he realises that I’m frozen on the doorstep.
I step into a hallway that’s lined with flickering candles and the impressive Imperial staircase is draped with swags of Christmassy foliage. The butler takes my coat and I follow him towards the living room, which is also filled with candles. There’s an enormous Christmas tree in the corner, shimmering with red and gold baubles. Shelby is standing there in full evening dress and looks every inch like an old-fashioned movie star. His dark-blond hair is swept back, immaculately styled. He’s so beautiful that I could just stand and stare at him all night.
‘This is lovely,’ I manage to say. ‘When did you do all this?’
‘I had someone in,’ he confesses. ‘You like it?’
‘Love it.’ The festive decorations make it look warmer, more intimate than usual.
The butler appears at my elbow with a tray and I take a glass of champagne. ‘Are we having a party?’ I ask Shelby.
‘Yes,’ he says. ‘But just the two of us.’
‘You’ve gone to a lot of trouble.’
‘I haven’t been fair to you,’ he says. ‘I shot off to Birmingham without consulting you and I shouldn’t have. The decision ought to have been a joint one.’
‘It’s your work . . .’
‘I know and, now I’m not going to be around for the rest of the month, I am regretting it.’
‘You should make the most of it. Sounds like you’re having a lot of fun.’
‘I am.’ His eyes sparkle in the candlelight. ‘It’s years since I’ve been on a stage. On television, if anything goes wrong we can retake a scene.’
‘Like when a bunch of unruly alpacas decided to trash the set?’
He laughs. ‘Thankfully, that doesn’t happen very often.’
I don’t think, even if I live to be a hundred, that I’ll forget the humiliation of that day.
‘When in front of an audience, it’s pure adrenaline,’ he continues. ‘Anything can go wrong and frequently does. It makes me feel very alive.’
‘Then it was the right decision,’ I tell him.
‘I wanted tonight to be special,’ he says. ‘It was partly Bev’s doing. She volunteered to step in while we spent some time alone.’
‘She’s wonderful.
I don’t know what I’d do without her.’
‘You should be relying on me,’ he points out. ‘I’m sorry to be abandoning you in the run up to Christmas.’
‘It will be all hands to the pump,’ I agree. In fact, I really need to get going tomorrow. If the Christmas tree is arriving that will spur us all into action. We have to do something with the five million dancing lights that Bev’s bought.
‘Want to see what’s on the menu?’ Shelby asks.
I nod and he steers me through to the kitchen where a chef is busy at the enormous range stove with its plethora of doors and hotplates. That’s another thing that terrifies me. How do you cook on that monster?
‘Evening,’ the chef says to us over his shoulder.
‘This is Stephen. He’s been here most of the day preparing dinner especially for us.’
‘Wow.’ Whatever it is, it smells divine. So we sit on the stools at the kitchen island, watching the chef as he works and explains to us what he’s cooking.
Dinner is served in the vast main dining room where candles abound again, there are arrangements of deep red roses entwined with holly on the table and it’s all very fancy. I try not to think that I’d be equally happy with a takeaway on the sofa with Shelby and appreciate all that he’s done for me. The food is wonderful. The house looks spectacular. The champagne is going to my head. He’s made a huge effort and I love him for it. I look across the table at him as he’s telling me a story about one of the actors in the panto and realise that, at this moment, I could not love him more.
After dinner, the chef and the butler leave and, finally, it’s just Shelby and me. He puts some slow music on and, in the living room, we dance by the Christmas tree, holding each other close. I rest my head on his shoulder and enjoy feeling the warmth of his hands on my skin.
We go to bed and I discover that Cunning Bev has packed an overnight bag for me and has brought it here – every eventuality catered for. I must thank her profusely for doing this.
Shelby and I make love and it’s just how it used to be. When he falls asleep, I lie awake curled against him, feeling happy, content. The moonlight streams through the window and bathes the room in a mellow glow. It could be like this, I think. Always. I know how much Shelby wants it. And it’s a beautiful home. Shelby is much more relaxed here than he is at the farm. Would it be too hard for me to leave Hope Farm and live here permanently? It’s a thought that keeps me awake until dawn.
Chapter Thirty
Too soon it’s morning and we’re back to normal. I’d like to say that we luxuriate in each other’s arms, but no – we’re both rushing around, hurtling into the day. Shelby has to head straight back to Birmingham. I need to get back to see if the farm is still standing.
‘This has been wonderful,’ I say. ‘Just what we needed.’
He takes me in his arms and holds me tightly. ‘Come to opening night,’ he says. ‘Ken will bring you. There’s a party afterwards. Put on your glad rags again.’
‘I don’t know . . .’
‘It would mean a lot to me to have you there.’
‘Could Ken bring me back afterwards? I don’t like to leave the farm two nights in one week.’ It’s unheard of and I can’t take Bev for granted. But how can I refuse? It’s hardly a lot to ask that I be there to support him.
‘OK,’ he says. ‘Let’s compromise. Come for the show and party, then Ken can drive you home. It will be a late one, but you’ll be back with your precious animals.’
I ignore the slight barb. ‘Can Lucas come too?’
‘Of course. Nothing would make me happier. If you can persuade him.’
That might take some doing. His father isn’t on his ‘favourites’ list and I’m pretty sure panto won’t be up there either.
As you know, I lay awake most of the night and my brain was very busy. I’d have to make a lot of sacrifices to move in with Shelby, but don’t I owe it to him to try? If this relationship is to work, then I have to be more open to his lifestyle and he to mine. Could I get a manager in to run the farm full time, I wonder? That someone would have to live on-site in the caravan as we need someone here 24/7. But then that would be more expense and eat into our valuable resources. What would I do with the dogs? I couldn’t bring them here. Betty Bad Dog would wreck the place within five minutes. That beautiful Christmas tree would be a goner. Valuable ornaments? All smashed. And what of Lucas? If we lived here would he want come back? My gut feeling is that he’d prefer to stay at the farm in the caravan and, in truth, that’s where I’m most comfortable too. I’d hate to move here and leave him behind. I couldn’t do it.
‘I’m sorry, but I have to run.’ Shelby’s voice breaks into the workings of my frenzied brain. ‘If you’re ready, Ken can drop you off on the way.’
‘I’m good to go.’ I have my overnight bag that I was very grateful for. My nice dress is safely packed away and I’m in my more customary jeans and jumper.
We jump into the car and Ken whisks me back to the farm. Bev opens the gate. The dogs hurl themselves at me as if I’ve been away for six months. Little Dog runs round and round in circles chasing his own tail in excitement. I step in front of Betty Bad Dog before she wees on Shelby’s shoes again. They’ll all be attached to me like limpets today in case I have the audacity to want to go anywhere without them.
‘Look,’ my friend says as she greets us. ‘All is just as you left it.’
‘I owe you one, my co-conspirator.’ Shelby hugs her.
Bev gives me side-eye. I can be in no doubt about what she’d like that ‘one’ to be. Naughty lady.
I kiss Shelby goodbye, embarrassed to have so many onlookers. ‘See you Wednesday,’ he says. ‘Don’t forget.’ Then he’s in the car and gone.
Bev and I watch him leave.
‘Was it utterly romantic?’ Bev asks.
‘It really was.’
‘And did you shag each other ragged?’
I laugh at her, outraged. ‘You’re so very rude.’
‘I’m so very jealous,’ she says.
‘Thank you for being sneaky enough to organise it.’ I link my arm through hers as we walk to the caravan. ‘I think it did us good to spend some time together.’
‘You’re seeing him on Wednesday?’
‘I doubt it.’ My heart sinks. ‘It’s opening night and he wants me to be there. But I can’t go out two nights in a week. I can’t put upon you again.’
‘You can,’ Bev says. ‘You know I don’t mind.’
But it’s not just that. I don’t mind seeing the panto, though it’s not really my thing. The after-show party is another matter. Since meeting Shelby, I’ve only been to a couple of social gatherings with his actor friends, but I’m so out of my comfort zone. I’d rather stick pins in my own eyes.
‘I did begin to think whether we might need a full-time manager on site.’
‘Blimey.’ Bev stares at me, aghast. ‘That’s radical for you.’
‘I know. But Shelby’s not comfortable here and, he’s right, there’s a massive house down the road standing empty.’
‘This is your life,’ she says. ‘You’ve worked so hard for it. Don’t rush into anything.’
‘I won’t. I have Lucas to think about, above all else.’
‘Lucas should be Shelby’s responsibility. He seems to be quite happy to have abdicated that and handed parental duties over to you.’
‘I don’t mind,’ I counter. ‘I’m hoping that if I hold the fort for now, it will be easier between them when Lucas is a bit older and more tolerant.’
‘He was fine last night, our lovely boy,’ she says. ‘A bit moody but that could be down to anything.’
‘Aurora didn’t show up?’
Bev shakes her head. ‘No.’
‘I can’t tell you how much I missed him.’ One night away from him is too much. I wonder whether he would consider spending a few nights at Homewood Manor for Christmas. It looks so beautiful in its festive garb and Shelby has gone to a lot of trouble.
Though I think I already know what the answer would be.
‘He’s up in the fields, but I’ve asked him to be back in the yard as soon as he can. The Christmas tree is coming any minute. I thought we’d gather the students around to watch. Might get them in the Christmas mood.’
‘Most of them are already completely hyper.’
‘I’m feeling a little buzzy myself,’ she admits. ‘First Christmas together with Alan and I’m looking forward to it.’
‘That will be lovely for you.’
‘Will Shelby definitely be at home too?’
I nod. ‘He said so. Panto finishes on Christmas Eve.’
And I get a little unexpected thrill of excitement myself. It will be our first Christmas together – me, Shelby and Lucas. After so many Christmases spent alone, I can’t wait. I want to make it wonderful for us all.
Chapter Thirty-One
I just have time to drop off my bag, fuss the dogs and swig down a quick cup of tea before a huge truck pulls up at the gate. Bev is already there with all the students gathered in the yard, so I dash outside.
I know the mayor said he’d donate a tree to us, but I hadn’t expected anything on this scale. It’s a bloody good job that Bev did bulk-purchase fairy lights. The entire flat-bed of the lorry is taken up with an enormous pine tree. The students go into a frenzy of excitement. So do the dogs.
Behind the truck is the mayor’s car. He parks up and jumps out, grinning as he comes towards me.
‘I never expected anything like this.’ I feel slightly over-whelmed.
His eyes are bright, excited. ‘You like it?’
‘I love it. Thank you so much. Bev must have known. You won’t believe how many lights she’s bought.’
‘I hope you’ll let me stay and decorate it with you.’
‘We’d be delighted to have you. Can I offer you some tea?’
‘Let’s get this beast unloaded,’ he says. ‘Once it’s in place, with all its branches intact, I can relax.’
Christmas for Beginners: Fall in love with the ultimate festive read from the Sunday Times bestseller Page 13