by Nora Cobb
“I was late.”
His breath forms a cloud around his head. “You’re never late.”
“Troy was in the fieldhouse talking shit.”
Jacob shakes his head. “He’s been doing that a lot lately.”
“He says you and Natalie have hooked up.”
Jacob is silent, and to his credit, he doesn’t play dumb. He doesn’t make me spell it out for him in plain language. He doesn’t make me ask if they’re fucking.
“Yeah, we’ve hooked up,” he replies simply.
The ground is rock hard under my feet, but the temperature in my body heats up. Why did I expect that he wouldn’t try it? Jacob is physical, and he relates physically to his world. He shouts, he yells, and he hits, while I overthink it and brood.
“Are we good, Lucas?” he asks.
I still can’t speak. I can’t form the thoughts in my head into sentences. For a moment, I wish I could be like him and let it out in unedited emotion. Not keep it locked in. Not sulk and glare until my problems become bored with my indecision and go away, tired of me.
“C’mon, man. Talk to me,” Jacob says. “Not to your head.”
“I’m pissed,” I blurt out. “I didn’t know you were going to do that.”
“Did you expect me to just hold her hand?”
“We should have discussed it.”
“Are you kidding me?” he hisses. “I’m supposed to call you every time I whip my dick out?”
“This isn’t sharing, man.”
“Then what is?” he asks.
Jacob stops running, and I do too. I love Natalie, but Jacob and I are closer than brothers. We have never argued over anything major until now. We stand, eyeing each other. His face is red, and it’s not from the cold. And I wonder if this is going to deteriorate into a fistfight. The cold is beginning to seep in through my sneakers. Coach Sanford blows the whistle, and we start moving again.
“Lucas, I’m serious,” continues Jacob. “I’m not trying to be a dick. I’m certain my father has a mistress, and my mother doesn’t seem bothered by it. She just kisses him on the cheek and relaxes with a good book in bed. But you know I’m not about to ask at the dinner table how that works for them.”
“Oh fuck,” I stumble as I laugh. “You’re nuts.”
“I’m right, though. Aren’t I? I could teach sex ed class, but relationships, that’s where I need help. What about you? What do you think?”
My mood shifts back to serious when I think about Taylor and the wine bottles collecting in the recycling bin. “Taylor and Dad don’t talk about it, but I know she’s not happy. Funny thing is that I know he’d be livid if she had something on the side.”
“Works for him, but not for her?”
“Something like that.” We turn the corner of the field and Coach glares at us like we’re running slowly on purpose.
“Are you going to talk to Taylor about the drinking?”
“I have to try. I don’t want to see her go down like that.”
“Well,” Jacob sighs, “let’s not be like that either, and next time you want to talk, just say something. Is this why you’ve been avoiding me and Natalie?”
“Maybe? Man, I don’t know.”
Jacob grunts, sending a white cloud out of his mouth. “You need to talk or you’re going to turn into Troy.”
I punch his bicep for the insult. “I can’t be that conniving.”
“I’m sure he said that up until the day he started to be a conniving prick.” He laughs. “So, is it okay with you? Are we good?”
I shrug my shoulders. “Natalie is sincere when she says she loves us both, and I’m good with you. I’m glad we’re not sneaking around behind each other’s backs. I’m also glad it’s out in the open. We’re tight, Jacob, and I don’t see any problem with what we’re doing. It’s nobody’s business but ours.” I’m pouring out my stream of consciousness out loud and wonder if I’m making any sense.
“Just to be clear,” Jacob adds, “I’m not going to hold your dick.”
“Don’t expect me to hold yours,” I laugh. “I’m surprised she can find anything under all that fur.”
“Fuck you. You’re smoother than a dolphin.”
We’re laughing as we pass by a scowling Stanford. He waves us in, and we run over to him. “Fuck it. It’s too goddamn cold,” he growls, stamping his feet on the frozen turf. “This is supposed to teach you a lesson, not make you laugh like a pair of co-eds.”
“You know what they say about fun and games.” Jacob wraps his arm around the old man’s shoulders. “Speaking of which, you want to share what’s in that flask, Coach?”
He scowls harder this time, but he gives Jacob his thermos. I hoot as Jacob takes a long swig.
“Don’t leave it dry, Fleming. I still got the wife to deal with at home.”
“Whoa,” Jacob laughs. “Who’d marry you? Your cousin?”
Stanford snatches the thermos away. “Only because your mother turned me down.”
Together, we whoop and holler. “Put me in my place, Coach,” laughs Jacob.
Stanford pats Jacob on the shoulder. “I’m going to miss you when you’re gone, you big dumb idiot.”
Stanford wraps an arm around Jacob and one around me as we walk toward North Hall. “I’m going to miss both of you. The lot coming up, they’re soft. They’d have called their parents rather than run the field.”
“Kids today suck, Coach,” replies Jacob.
“Ain’t that the goddamn truth, Fleming.”
CHAPTER 4
Arielle
Montlake Academy makes it to the hockey tournaments starting in February, so Lucas is at practice when I drop by his house. All the Montlake jocks are dedicated to practice, though very few go pro. Most of them end up quitting sports after college to work in their families’ various businesses. No doubt Lucas will work with his father making money doing whatever it is they do in the city. I guess I should know, but my only interest is in securing the right husband. Troy has only ever been a way to make Lucas jealous and see reason.
And then the jerk helped Natalie get back into Montlake after all I did to get rid of her. I dropped him fast because Troy isn’t going to make me look bad.
At four o’clock, it’s pitch-dark outside, but it doesn’t matter. I know the way to Lucas’ house blindfolded without GPS. I sent Taylor a cheery text asking if it would be okay to have a girl talk like old times. Taylor’s twice my age, at least, but she likes to pretend it’s a much smaller age gap.
Lexi suggested that I wear an outfit from her mom’s tacky boutique. I’m not an Instagram model with a Photoshop filter, looking for followers. I still have my cousin’s old khaki skirt that I borrowed to see Cromwell in. I could use that ugly thing to cover my car. No, I have to look chic and classic when I see Taylor. I put on my mother’s winter-white jumpsuit and faux fur vest with low-heel boots and a knit cap. I check out my reflection, satisfied that I look fashionable but not slutty.
“Something to drink, Arielle?” Taylor stands at a mini wet-bar setup in the living room. It’s a glass and wood cart that blends in with the pristine Danish décor of their home. It looks like stupid Frozen in this mansion of blond wood and glass, and it bores me. White is such a safe color when one wants to appear cultured. It’s an old trick for people who lacks imagination, and Taylor compliments my white outfit. I wish she’d ask me for advice.
“Do you have diet soda?” I reply.
She looks down her slender nose at me. “You sure that’s strong enough for you?”
“With ice, please,” I smile.
She hands me a glass of diet cola with a coaster, and then sits down on the L-shaped couch, but not too close. She sips her cheap chardonnay. I smelled it on her breath when she air-kissed me at the door. If Wiley the bodyguard saw her, would he make her dump it in the sink? Is Wiley here to protect or keep order? I know too much.
Now, Taylor barely tolerates me, but when I was a baby, she doted on me. I wasn’t a thr
eat to her delicate vanity back then. She still looks attractive for a woman of her age, but she better stop drinking soon. Definitely better than Troy’s mom; if they stretch Maya Saunders’ face any tighter, she’ll have eyes in the back of her head.
“I’ve come for your advice, Taylor.” I take a breath and continue, “Lucas and I had a silly disagreement that should have never happened, and I would like to reconcile with him.”
Her hazel eyes narrow on me. “What makes you think Lucas would want you back now that Troy Saunders has had you?”
“Taylor,” I gasp. “Troy and I ... He’s never touched me.”
She laughs so hard that she falls back into the couch. “If I were a judge, I’d charge you with perjury. Be honest, Arielle. You’re not a virgin.”
I pinch my palm as hard as I can until my eyes tear. “People gossip, and it’s cruel. I’ve had intimate moments, but I’ve never allowed any man to touch me in that way. I want Lucas to be my first.”
Taylor wipes her eyes and snorts. “Look, I know what I had to do to get a ring, and I doubt if much has changed. I don’t blame you for tasting a sample of what’s out there before settling down to the meal. I didn’t need to, but some women feel the need.”
I don’t like what she’s implying, but it’s true. I wanted to go farther with Lucas, but he never seemed to be into it. I didn’t feel like waiting. “What does that mean?” I ask.
“It means that my son talks to me. He came to me with his heart broken after you cheated on him time and time again. According to Lucas, it’s a miracle you never got pregnant.”
I gawk, for real this time. “That’s a bald-faced lie.”
“You’re calling my son a liar?”
“No, but what people have been telling him, that’s a lie. I’ve done things to make him jealous, but I would never.”
I let out a pitiful sob, and Taylor rolls her eyes. She walks over to the bar and brings me a napkin to dry my eyes.
“Arielle, I turned a blind eye in the past because of the marriage contract between our two families.” Taylor leans in toward me and puts on the sweet voice, “But you broke it and broke my darling son’s heart.”
Please, bitch. I want to roll my eyes at that. It’s all so fake. One day, I wish I could tell everyone to just say what they really fucking mean. When I was five, I got what I wanted when I asked for it, but as a fucking adult, we’re all supposed to just talk in circles, and for what?
“There is no reason why I would want to see Lucas toyed with again.” Taylor’s voice is colder than a freezer.
“But I love him,” I wail.
“Liar.” Taylor leans in closer, and I have to lean back to avoid her breath. “We know love doesn’t make a marriage, so what do you really want?”
I’d like to tell the truth. I want to tell Taylor that her son’s not interested in me, but I have to marry well because I have an older sibling, and my parents expect it. Help me out, lady. I can’t reveal my true motives; people aren’t that advanced. Wild animals get it, but civilized people suck at this.
“I didn’t dump him,” I dab my eyes with the soggy napkin. “He dumped me for an outsider. I never wanted to break up, but that girl came between us. And she’s willing to do things.” I grimace. “She wants Lucas to ... to ...”
Taylor frowned. “To do what, Arielle?”
“To share her with other men,” I blurt out. “When I found out what he wanted, I had to break it off. I can’t do that, Taylor. I can’t have sex while I’m being watched.”
On cue, I start to bawl and cover my face with my hands.
Taylor’s perfect composure crumples as she grabs her chardonnay and drains the glass. She gets up and refills it to the rim. Between my fingers, I watch, wondering if she’ll down it first, but she doesn’t. Shell-shocked, she sits down next to me and holds the glass by the stem, turning it.
“Who’s this girl?” she whispers.
“Natalie Page.”
Taylor’s eyes widen, and I know why. She’s heard the gossip.
“Not the one with the website?” she asks.
“Yes, Taylor. Oh, you didn’t know. I am so sorry.” I dry my face, dabbing away the tears, but not too much. I don’t think I can cry like that again. At least, not for another hour.
Taylor looks at the wineglass, and to her credit, she puts it down on the table without taking a sip. I’ve always admired her self-control, and I see a blue, pulsing vein in her temple, marring her porcelain complexion.
“I thought she was expelled,” says Taylor.
I toss the soggy napkin aside, and it lands on the table. “Natalie claimed it was Photoshop, but it wasn’t. It was real. I found the pictures on Lucas’ phone. She must have sent them to him, and God knows who else.”
“Wasn’t she expelled?” asks Taylor.
“Her uncle is buying a new visual communications building at Montlake. So they let her back in.”
Taylor starts. “Is her uncle that rich?”
“He’s a tech mogul. New money. You know how they are.” I take a sip of my soda.
“A building’s not enough to make that scandal go away.”
“Troy’s father bought shares in her uncle’s company, and as a favor, he spoke to Principal Cromwell. He helped her to get reenrolled into Montlake. This whore with no morals has made my life a living hell from day one. She stole Lucas from me, and now she’s about to sink her dirty claws into another family.”
I press my hand to my mouth and squeeze one more tear out. Taylor stares, dumbfounded, as she makes another connection.
“Oh my God. She came to my house, and they disappeared together.” Her voice trails off and she covers her mouth with her hand.
I didn’t know that Natalie had been here. I sniff and grab for the soggy napkin again. Taylor offers me a fresh one, and I thank her.
“I really love Lucas,” I whisper, “and all I want is for him to be safe and happy, but he won’t talk to me. Not with Natalie Page around.”
Taylor reaches for her wineglass and takes a long sip. I wonder how she burns off the carbs. She sits there, thinking and staring at her wineglass. Taylor narrows her eyes on me again.
“Before she showed up,” Taylor says, “things were already sour between you and Lucas. I’m not foolish enough to think that you love my son. You were straying from him, and if you think I would ever tolerate some other man’s bastards in this house—”
“I would never do that.” I wrinkle my nose as if even the thought of sex is repulsive. “It’s disgusting and wrong. I only want Lucas. I swear I only did what I did to make Lucas jealous. He has a wandering eye; all men do. The girls offer them favors in the fieldhouse. Natalie has seduced all the captains except Troy.”
“Who else is she with?” asks Taylor.
Perfect. “Jacob Fleming. He visits her at home.”
Taylor finishes off her wine, and I watch to see if she’ll pour another. My cola needs ice, and I’m tempted to ask her to get some.
“Troy isn’t interested in her?” asks Taylor.
My back stiffens. “For now, he’s not. But I’m sure that will change once she gets bored of Jacob and Lucas. Troy’s father is helping her into Columbia.”
“What a mess.” Frowning, Taylor sits up straight. “What is wrong with you kids? It’s high school, not a trashy reality television show. This is sick.”
“I thought dating Troy would make Lucas notice me again. But Troy is falling under Natalie’s spell, too. He was a rebound, that’s all. I can’t stand the thought of marrying Troy when I know I still love Lucas.”
Taylor places her hand on her forehead as if it hurts. She reaches for her empty glass but changes her mind. Obviously, she’s shaken by what she’s heard. I walk to the mini-bar, pour ice water into a glass, and set it down in front of her. With a fresh napkin, I wipe my face dry.
She thanks me and sips it. Her mind seems to clear. “This is horrible, Arielle, but I don’t know about you and Lucas. Maybe it would be be
tter if you started fresh with someone else.”
“I don’t want anyone else,” I wring the napkin in my hands. “My parents are committed to the marriage contract, despite what has happened between Lucas and me. You know, it’s about building alliances, not just love.”
Taylor averts her gaze, and her fingertips touch the rim of the water glass. I rarely see Lucas’ dad anymore. The only man I see Taylor with is Wiley, and I don’t imagine that anything is happening there.
“Also,” I add. “There’s a heavy penalty if your family breaks the contract.”