by Bowen, Rhys
“I’ve got a little put by,” Alice said. “Not much. And I’ve relatives in London, but frankly, I’ve already decided I’m not going back there. So I’ve had a chance to think this past couple of days, and you know what I’m thinking? I liked that little village we were in. I enjoyed Nell Lacey’s company, and she’s struggling to run that pub on her own. So I thought I might offer my services. She doesn’t have to pay me, but she can offer me a roof over my head, and I’ll help her with the pub and taking care of her husband when he comes home.”
“Oh,” Emily said, trying to be glad for Alice, but realizing that this plan did not include her. “That’s a splendid idea, Alice.”
“It need not be forever,” Alice said. “Just until the world returns to normal.” She looked at Emily. “You could come, too. I bet a pub has to have spare rooms.”
Emily shook her head. “No, I couldn’t. I’m not being a burden to anybody. I have the pay that is owed me that I haven’t touched, which would take care of my board and lodging for a while, and I’ve some jewellery I could sell, but I don’t want charity.”
“How is it charity for a friend to want to take care of you?” Alice asked sharply.
“You would be tainted with my shame,” Emily said.
“That’s bloody nonsense and you know it. Anyway, you tell people you’re a war widow. Nearly everyone is. No one will even question it. The subject of your young man didn’t come up during the week we were there. You’d be quite safe.”
“No, I told Lady Charlton all about him, and how we were going to marry and move to Australia. She gave me a compass as an early wedding present. So if she knows, Mrs Trelawney knows, too. And if Mrs Trelawney knows, she’s probably told the whole village.”
“Don’t you believe it, love. They don’t like that Mrs Trelawney down in the village. They think she’s spiteful and gives herself airs.”
Emily stared out of the window. It was a bright day, and puffball clouds raced across the sky. She remembered the view when they had stood together on the moor, how hopeful everything had seemed, how perfect the village had looked lying in its hollow. And her thoughts went to the little cottage.
“There is one thing I could do,” she said slowly. “I could ask Lady Charlton if I could live in the cottage in return for continuing to work on her garden. It doesn’t seem she’ll have any gardeners returning from the war, so I can be useful.”
“You’d rather live in that poky place than in a room in the pub?”
“Yes, I would,” Emily said. “Only I’d have to tell Lady Charlton the truth first. It would be up to her to decide.”
“Well, at least we’d be close by and I could keep an eye on you. Make sure you were eating properly,” Alice said. “And I could help you get that place spruced up again. It needs a lick of paint, a good scrubbing and new curtains.”
“Yes,” Emily said. “I believe it could be quite nice.”
Daisy came into the room and beamed when she saw Emily. “Oh, you’re back,” she said. “Did you have a lovely time with your folks? And what do you think of my hair?” Her bob was shorter than Alice’s, and it bounced when she twirled. “It feels so free and light. My dad’s going to kill me when I go home. But then I’m not sure I’m going home again. I’m certainly not working at that place.”
“You should come with Emily and me to the village,” Alice said.
“What village? When?”
“When we’re kicked out of this,” Alice said. “I’m going to see if Nell Lacey wants help at the pub and Emily’s going to move into the cottage.”
“That cottage? The haunted one?” Daisy looked worried. “Why?”
“Because I want a place of my own, Daisy. A place where no one knows me.”
“Why would you do that?” Daisy was frowning. “You’ve got a nice home to go to.”
“I haven’t. I can’t go home any more. I’m going to have a baby.”
“Blimey,” she said, picking up Alice’s favourite swear word.
“Please don’t tell the others yet.”
“Oh, I won’t. How awful for you. But at least you’re not going to let them send you to one of those homes. I’ve heard about them. Terrible places, and they won’t even let you see the baby after it’s born.”
“No, I have no intention of going to any home,” Emily said. “Somehow or another, I’m going to make this work for me and my baby.”
“And you think the old lady will let you live in her cottage?” Daisy asked.
“I have no idea. I’ll have to see, and if not, then I’ll think again, but I’d like it there, and I’d like to be near Alice in the pub.”
“And what about me? You can’t leave me behind,” Daisy said. “I want to go where you go.”
“Maybe one of the other women will want a helper,” Alice said. “Mrs Upton in the shop, or Mrs Soper at the smithy.”
Daisy had to smile. “I don’t see myself as a blacksmith,” she said. “But I do know how to be a housemaid. Old Lady Charlton only has that one maid, Ethel, and she’s old and short-sighted, isn’t she? I’ve seen the dust in that place.”
“But I thought you didn’t want to go back into service,” Alice said.
“I don’t, but I think I’ll go where I’m needed for now. And I’d be close to the two of you.”
“Rightio,” Alice said, clapping her hands together. “That’s settled then.”
“If we’re all to go to the village together,” Emily said, “then there is something you have to do for me.”
“What’s that?” Alice asked.
“See if you can get some scissors and cut off my hair, too!”
Daisy ran down to the office, then came back with a big pair of scissors. Emily took the pins out of her roll of hair. She shook it out and it fell loose over her shoulders.
“You do it, Alice,” Daisy said. “I’d be afraid I’d mess up.”
“Are you sure about this, Emily?” Alice asked, glancing nervously at Daisy. “It’s a big step to take. Daisy and me, we’ve got nothing to lose, but your family . . .”
“Absolutely,” Emily said forcefully. “I’m not letting you two be modern women if I can’t be one, too.”
“Right then. Here we go.” Alice picked up a length of Emily’s hair and there was a satisfying snipping sound. The lock of hair tumbled to the floor. Emily sat still, holding her breath while hair piled up on the floor around her.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
The end of their stint in the Women’s Land Army came sooner than expected. A spate of bad weather set in, turning fields into lakes. It was clear no more planting could be done. Miss Foster-Blake assembled the women.
“His Majesty’s government thanks you for your service,” she said. “Most of you will not be needed again until next spring, and not even then if the war is over and the men have returned home. I am asking for volunteers to stay on and work with farmers who have animals throughout the winter. We have requests for milking assistance, plus one for pigs. You may be called upon to serve again next spring.”
“You ain’t catching me working with no pigs,” Alice muttered to Emily, who was standing beside her. “And I wasn’t too hot at milking either.”
“I don’t mind volunteering for the pigs,” came a voice at the back, and they turned in surprise to see it was Mrs Anson.
She smiled at the horrified faces. “I am actually fascinated with pigs. Such intelligent creatures, and the piglets are adorable.”
A couple of hands were raised for milking duties.
“Thank you,” Miss Foster-Blake said. “And the rest of you, there will be some kind of transportation coming for you in the morning to take you into Tavistock.”
Emily approached her as the others dispersed. “We plan to go back to Bucksley Cross,” she said. “Do you think the bus or van could take us there tomorrow?”
When the older woman looked surprised, Emily said, “We are hoping to work up there and spend the winter.”
“Do
you have someone who will take you in?” Miss Foster-Blake asked, a worried expression on her face.
“I hope so. I think I’ve come up with a plan. If it doesn’t work, then I will have to think again, but Alice has a place where she will be welcome, so she’ll keep an eye on me. And Daisy will probably have a job, too.”
Miss Foster-Blake put a tentative hand on Emily’s arm. “Are you sure you are doing the right thing, my dear? It can be quite cold and bleak up near the moor like that. And far from a doctor, I should imagine. I’ll give you my card, and you can always contact me if you change your mind about the home.”
“You are very kind,” Emily said. “But I am hopeful this will work out for me. One thing I am sure of—I’m not going to give up my child.”
She joined the others packing up their belongings.
“I can’t say I’ll be sorry to leave this dump,” Alice said. “It’s getting ruddy cold in here now that winter’s coming. And I won’t be sorry to stop planting ruddy onions either.”
“I feel the same,” Daisy said. “Although I enjoyed having all of you to talk to. That part was fun, wasn’t it? And I liked the apple picking. And when the three of us were working in Lady Charlton’s garden.”
“You can come and help me push the mower when we are back there, if you’ve a mind to, Daisy,” Emily chuckled.
Daisy looked worried. “What if Lady Charlton doesn’t want another maid? What if nobody wants me there?”
Alice put an arm around her bony shoulders. “Don’t you worry, love. We’re not going to leave you out in the cold. We’ll find a place for you, I promise. But I think the old lady would need her head examined if she didn’t take up your kind offer of being her maid. Anyone can see that house is in need of a good cleaning.”
“You’re all right, you lot,” Maud said, entering their conversation. “You’ve got it figured out. I haven’t. I could go home, but my mum is always bossing me around, and I’ve six brothers and sisters, and I have to share a bed, and there’s no work for me to do.”
“Make sure you give us your address, Maud,” Alice said. “If we find something for you, we’ll let you know.”
“Will you really? You’re so kind. You’re a good lot, all of you.”
Her round, placid face broke into a big smile.
The next morning, an old, rickety lorry took the other girls into Tavistock and then returned to drive Emily, Alice and Daisy up to Bucksley Cross. They were deposited, with their suitcases, at the bottom of the village green. Emily and Daisy let Alice go ahead into the pub. She seemed to be in there for quite a while, and then she came out, beaming.
“Nell Lacey nearly wept when I told her what we were suggesting. She said she had no idea how she was going to cope when her bloke came home and I must be an angel from heaven.”
They waited for her to say more. She saw their faces, then added. “Oh, and I said you might be staying at the pub, depending on how things went. You can bring your things in for now, anyway.”
There was a big fire now burning in the bar, and the room was deliciously warm. Nell poured them all a cup of tea, and they sat close to the fire. Emily hesitated for as long as she could, then said, “Well, I suppose I had better get it over with. At least, I want to know.”
“Know what?” Mrs Lacey asked.
“She wants to move into the cottage.”
Nell threw back her head and laughed. “I shouldn’t think there would be a single reason to prevent you from doing that, my lovey. Who else would want to live there?”
“It’s more complicated than that,” Emily said. “But I hope you are right.”
She buttoned her overcoat over the uniform that she’d be wearing for the last time and walked resolutely up the drive to Bucksley House. This time, she rang the front doorbell. Mrs Trelawney opened it, the suspicion showing in her face when she saw Emily.
“Oh, it’s you again. What do you want?”
“I’d like to speak to Lady Charlton please,” Emily said, as pleasantly as she could. “Is she available?”
“I’ll go and see.” The woman turned and walked away, leaving Emily standing on the front step. She returned, frowning. “Her Ladyship will see you. Wipe your feet.”
Emily wiped her feet dutifully on the doormat, then followed Mrs Trelawney down the hall to the drawing room. The old lady was sitting by the fire, and she looked up with a smile of anticipation when Emily came in. “Well, this is a delightful surprise,” she said. “I thought you had gone for good. I imagined you’d be on your way to Australia by now. In fact, I got out the atlas to see if I could trace your sea journey.” She glanced up at Mrs Trelawney, who was hovering in the doorway. “We will have coffee served in here right away, Mrs Trelawney. And some of your gingerbread.” She turned back to Emily. “Do sit down, my dear. Pull a chair up to the fire. The weather has turned quite cold.”
Emily moved an upholstered chair closer to the fire and looked up to see Lady Charlton staring at her. “Have you decided to become a man?”
“A man?” Emily was confused. She had practised so many times what she wanted to say, and this had completely thrown her.
“Your hair, young lady. It makes you look like a man.”
“Oh, my hair.” Emily put her hand up to the unfamiliar bob. “I decided to be a modern woman, and it’s so much easier than long hair.”
Lady Charlton was still frowning. “I have to say that it suits you, although I have no wish to become a modern woman myself. So has the trip to Australia been postponed?”
Emily took a deep breath. “I won’t be going to Australia any longer, Lady Charlton,” she said. “You see, my young man was killed. His plane crashed.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry. What a shock for you.”
“Yes,” Emily said, her voice breaking. “A great shock.”
They both lapsed into awkward, sad silence, only broken by the slow tick of the grandfather clock and the crackle of the logs on the fire.
“So what will you do now?” Lady Charlton asked.
“Actually, that’s why I came to see you,” Emily said, remembering herself. “I have a proposition for you, Lady Charlton.”
“A proposition?” Lady Charlton sounded amused.
“I would like to live in that little cottage, and in return, I’ll continue to take care of your garden. I don’t ask for any pay, just to take my midday meal at the house and for Mr Simpson to provide me with either wood or coal for the fire and stove.”
Lady Charlton was frowning. “Now, why on earth would you want to do that?”
“To put it simply, because I have nowhere else to go. My parents and I do not see eye to eye . . .”
“You’ve quarrelled with your parents?”
“They didn’t approve of my young man.”
“I see. But breaking off contact with your family is a serious move, my dear. Something you might come to regret later.”
Emily hesitated, then took a deep breath. “I have to be completely frank with you: I’m expecting a baby. Lieutenant Kerr and I were not able to marry before he died, although he had proposed and given me a ring. But in the eyes of the world, that makes me a social outcast. My parents have made it more than clear what they think of girls like me. So I can completely understand if you would not want to be tainted with someone in my condition.”
Lady Charlton was still frowning. “I can’t possibly allow you to work in my garden,” she said.
Emily went to stand up. “I quite understand. I won’t trouble you any further.”
Lady Charlton waved a hand to stop Emily as she started to rise to her feet. “No, no, silly girl. What I meant was that you can’t be expected to work in the garden in your condition.”
“I really don’t mind,” Emily said. “I’m not an invalid. I don’t think I can manage the lawnmower alone, but I can certainly weed and prune and take care of the kitchen garden.”
“Maybe for another month or so, but the winters can be quite brutal here. But I have a pro
position for you in return. I need someone to catalogue my husband’s collections and books. I have kept meaning to do it, but old age has made me lazy. And I rather fear I may have to sell some of his things to keep this place afloat if the home farm is not able to spring back into operation soon.”
“I can certainly help you with that,” Emily said. “In fact, I’d enjoy it immensely.”
“And there can be no question of your living at the cottage,” Lady Charlton said. “We can find you a room in the house.”
Emily shook her head. “No, thank you very much. But I’d rather have my own place. I don’t want Mrs Trelawney to feel beholden to me, and I want to stand on my own feet.”
The old lady looked at her long and hard, then she nodded. “I understand. You need space to work through your grief.”
Emily returned her gaze. “Yes,” she said. “That’s it exactly. Since I heard the news, we’ve been working hard in the fields all day. At night, I’ve been sleeping in a room with five other women. And then the shock about the baby . . . I have locked my grief away.”
“Just don’t let it overwhelm you,” Lady Charlton said. “You will get over it, you know. At this moment, you think you won’t, but you will. In time, you will be able to look back upon your beloved as a fond memory.”
“So I can move into the cottage?” Emily asked, finding this conversation almost more than she could bear. “And I can ask Simpson for some coal or firewood?”
“With my blessing,” the old lady said. “But why don’t you take your meals here at the house?”
“As tempting as that is, I have to learn to be independent. I have been coddled all my life. Now I shall be responsible for a child. I’d appreciate a midday meal if I’m out working in the garden, but other than that . . .”
“I hope I might persuade you to dine with me on occasion,” Lady Charlton said. “I’d welcome the company. There is nothing more dreary than dining alone.”
“Then I will be happy to join you, on occasion,” Emily said.
“Well, that’s settled then,” the old lady said. “Work on the garden if you like. I can understand you don’t want to be cooped up all day with an old woman. But when the weather is not conducive to outdoor activities, then you and I shall catalogue the collections.” A wistful look came over her face. “This might prove helpful if I decide that I have to sell Bucksley House.”