by Nikki Rae
His satisfied grin made me falter, and before I could stop him, my Owner had slipped away, using his free hand to pin my arms behind my back.
“Tell me, my love,” he murmured close to my collarbone, eyeing the necklace around my throat. The way he held me made my back arch, and I could feel his warm breath through the thin cotton of my shirt. “Do you think you are in any position to make demands?”
I knew what this was: he was trying to determine what I was up to. It probably wasn’t a question to him that I’d attempt another escape; Master Lyon was right not to trust me, but it didn’t wound me any less.
Master Lyon loosened his grasp, but not enough that I could shy away. With his mouth against my cheek, he whispered, “Do I need to repeat myself, ma petite Biche?”
My little Doe. kleine maus, Gregor had called me. Little mouse.
I immediately tried to shake my head, but he halted my movement. My Owner had always instructed I speak out loud, that I look at him. I hadn’t realized before now it was because he needed to see me.
I’d become skillful at checking out after my return to the Compound, and he’d known from the beginning just how to dismantle the careful shelter I’d built around myself.
“No, sir,” I finally answered, staring straight into his eyes. “But I would like to make them anyway.”
His expression broke with a taunting smile and he released my arms, wrapping them around his shoulders instead. “Go on.”
I bit my lip, suddenly embarrassed. Mercifully, my Owner leaned my head against his chest, keeping no space between us so he wouldn’t miss what I said. “I’d like you to call me Fawn…for the foreseeable future.”
He nodded once. “Done.”
It shouldn’t have been this easy to get what I wanted; it never was.
“What else?”
I shook my head, not knowing how to explain. “I just want to be close.”
Using Marius’ words right now put tension on my voice as I repeated them, but Master Lyon mistook it for timid fear.
“So forward,” he said, “yet you don’t know how to ask for what you want.”
Beneath me, I felt him hardening again; he was enjoying this.
“You know better than I, Master.”
He gingerly twisted my hair around one wrist, taking great care not to pull too much. “There’s my smart girl.”
My Owner’s voice echoed through me, making my skin overly sensitive. It didn’t help matters when his tongue made contact, both warming and chilling wherever it touched. Through my shirt, he teased my nipples, using his mouth and hands. The sensation flooded me with a static heat, and without meaning to, my hips rolled in search of more.
I was partially aware of the sound of fabric ripping a second before I felt it split down the center of my chest. He tossed aside the shreds as if they were nothing, pulling me closer so our bodies were flush against each other, skin to skin. Scars to scars.
Laying my head on his shoulder, he repositioned my legs on either side of him so I could feel more of his rigid length, only separated by the underwear he’d let me wear to bed. His palm was on the small of my back, guiding my hips into a rhythm they’d already created.
“How needy you are,” he teased, pinching the sensitive flesh he’d marked and making me gasp as a new heat flooded the space between my thighs. “So desperate you’re willing to grind against me.”
I nodded into him, cheeks going red even though he hadn’t said anything we didn’t already know. “Please, sir.”
It slipped past my lips, yet I was uncertain what I was pleading for.
“Hush,” he gently scolded, and a whimper was my only response. He stroked my bare ribcage, a wave of chills coursing through me.
Master Lyon wrapped my legs around his waist so I could better feel him, and he knew just where to direct the right amount of pressure, keeping me teetering on the edge. I was right where he wanted until he decided I was worthy of what I craved.
My fists turned into claws against his back, and I didn’t care what I looked like, whether he would see me as weak.
Just as my climax was about to crash into me, he gripped my hips, extricating me from his lap and throwing me to the mattress with so much force I bounced against the pillows and sheets. Wide-eyed, I stared up at him as one hand held my arms above my head and the other rested against my throat. He didn’t squeeze, looking intently into my eyes as we both caught our breath. He knelt beside me, no longer touching me where I needed him to and making me cry out in frustration.
“I thought you told me I knew best, Fawn,” he cooed, ignoring my attempts to free myself. He brought me forward, fingers digging into the skin around my throat but not enough to hurt. Part of me wished it did; I deserved nothing less.
“Do you think you can fool me again, my love?” he whispered against my lips. I wasn’t sure what he was implying—whether he thought I was trying to distract him so I could leave or if he really wanted to know the answer.
“No, sir.” I said, realizing just how true it was. I wouldn’t be able to make him trust me right now. Not with the wounds so fresh and when we were so far from home.
His nose grazed mine. “I think I quite like you this way,” he said, briefly cupping my sex but not meeting my frustrated movements. “Perhaps it would be good for you, not getting what you want for once.”
Master Lyon’s tone had stayed playful, almost flirtatious, but he meant it.
“Please,” I begged, the urge to cry at the back of my throat.
Ever so slowly, he loomed over me, removing the pillows from the bed so I lay flat and I could feel his length against my thigh while I was unable to bring him any closer. “No.”
I bucked against him and he refused to provide any more friction, drawing a growl from my chest. I had asked him to be my Owner, and that meant I no longer decided what I could have; I’d given it up for him. To have all of him.
When any hope of finding release had left me, he let me go. “On your stomach.”
Swallowing hard, I obeyed. He tucked a pillow under my arms, tracing the scars on my back. When I felt him removing the underwear I instinctively tried to sit up, but he stopped me.
“Shh,” he whispered across my skin. “Stay just like that.”
I could feel the mattress shift as he stood. “Keep your eyes closed,” he said from somewhere nearby.
Licking my lips, I listened to his footsteps as they retreated towards the door where he’d left his bag. I heard him open it, retrieve some unknown item, and then he was beside me again. “This might hurt a little, but it will make you feel better.”
Then I felt the cool sensation as he rubbed in some kind of ointment into my flesh, the way he had when he’d first beaten me. He’d possessed the means to relieve my pain at any time, and for some reason he chose now.
I wanted to feel connected to him even if it was purely physical, but he wouldn’t come near me. Instead, he picked up the shreds of my shirt, turned me over, and tied me down. Motionless, I watched him wrap the cotton around my wrist, avoiding the one I’d sprained. Then he moved on, securing both ankles so my legs were spread. As an afterthought, he pulled up my underwear and covered me with the sheet.
“We have a few hours until we need to start driving again,” he informed me, turning out the light. Tugging on a shirt and shoving his feet into his shoes, he kissed my forehead. “Go back to sleep, Fawn.”
It wasn’t as dark as before, and he cracked open the curtains so I could glimpse the city below. Overheated, I was unable to shed the blankets once he left.
He had won again, effectively proving just how much harder this would be than I’d originally anticipated.
Fifteen
Some hours later, he had joined me, bare torso against my side as I lay flat on my back and waited for sleep to return. He didn’t explain where he’d gone or what he’d been doing, but I knew it had something to do with Marius by how restless he was. We stayed in bed until early evening, and when I
fully woke, Master Lyon left to get us dinner while I was allowed to freely roam the room. By the time he came back ten minutes later, I had tidied up the beds, showered, dressed, and packed our things. I hadn’t been asked to do this, but feeling useful was better than the alternative. It had all become routine; waking without speaking, cleaning up, waiting for my Owner to come back. It was much like the Compound, where there was a set schedule most days except holidays, and even then, girls like me were uninvited to any festivities, forced to watch from the outside.
I wore another dress Master Lyon had left hanging for me in the closet, and he’d provided new shoes with the tags still on. They were comfortable flats, and the light rose color of the fabric covering my torso made my hair look darker along with the circles around my eyes. Today, he’d provided underwear for me, and as I slid them on, I found there was significantly less soreness there.
All the while, I concentrated on other things, yet my gaze eventually wandered to the phone. I was too afraid to call Marius again—either Master Lyon would come back or there would be no answer. Or worse: the Wolf would greet me.
I didn’t want to hear his voice and I would soon have time to reach another phone. Though I was aggravated I didn’t have a more detailed plan of attack, I couldn’t pinpoint anything to an exact spot when we were constantly on the move.
The lock clicked outside and my Owner returned to find me stuffing the remnants of what I’d slept in into the bottom of my backpack.
He first glanced at me, taking in how I looked when the tiny marks and bruises were concealed. In the mirror this morning, I’d counted three along my neck and chest, and then two more near my ribs. I couldn’t recall how they’d gotten there, only that he’d left them behind—another memory.
By noon, we were back in the car. Thankfully, he played music along our route today, and the soft cello lulled me in and out of sleep. Whenever we hit a bump or turn, I would wake, the bruises along my bottom sparking aches that traveled all the way up my spine. When I closed my eyes again, pieces of last night came back to me. Him ripping my clothes, his mouth on my skin. How he’d brought me to the edge of the world yet refused to let me taste it.
When the clock in the middle of the dashboard read five, I was fully alert. The extra rest was more than needed, and I had to take advantage of it all I could.
“How are you feeling?” he asked, turning down the music when it wasn’t all that loud.
Rubbing my face, I sat up in my seat and stretched, aware of every muscle as if he himself pulled their strings. “A lot better,” I finally settled on, adjusting my seat to better support my back. “I was just really tired.”
I stared out the window and watched as the landscape of trees whizzed by. His gaze was tacked to the road as he asked, “No more withdrawal symptoms?”
Shaking my head, I changed the subject. “It’s still sunny,” I said, motioning outside.
If he was taken off guard, he hid it well. “It’s summer.” There was an odd echo of remorse in his voice, and I wasn’t certain what it could mean. “The days are longer, plants come back to life.”
I think we both imagined the lush grounds of Lyon Estate. All his pretty flowers that stayed in the greenhouse and the trees surrounding us that never died. I’d arrived at the beginning of winter, and I’d only caught a glimpse of the new life he spoke about before we had to leave. When I was first brought there, it was another cage. Now it was the opposite. It kept the bad things out.
“Home probably looks beautiful.”
If I closed my eyes, I could imagine flying past the stables and into the woods, Master Lyon racing me as Marius guided Opal through the trees. I could smell the damp earth of my Owner’s domain, see how his scars reflected the dim light, even where he’d tried to black them out of existence.
For all we knew, the gardens had been destroyed. Would it ever look like home again?
“I would love for you to see it,” he said, looking at me for the first time in hours, eyes warm.
We left it at that, quiet again. He didn’t turn the music back on, and at first I thought it was because he had more to say, but the more time ticked on, the less likely that appeared. Master Lyon didn’t know what he should tell me. How much to show. I knew the game well, and he was unaware I had the advantage.
At the upcoming exit, a white convertible merged into traffic, not seeming to care there were other drivers on the road. Cursing in French under his breath, Master Lyon easily maneuvered around the chaos, bypassing the vehicle. Though I trusted he knew what he was doing behind the wheel, the unexpected danger had made my pulse quicken. Every muscle in my body buckled, sending shockwaves through the welts on my behind to the point that I actually yelped when he threw us into the appropriate lane.
“Are you okay?” Master Lyon asked, hand darting out to touch me but stopping before he did.
He was still punishing me, and I didn’t even think he was aware of it. “Yes, sir.”
My Owner’s gaze drifted to mine, and as if he saw something I couldn’t, he smirked before returning his eyes to the road. “I suppose you’re sore.”
I bit the inside of my cheek, not sure how I should respond. Between us, he shifted something in the car that made it accelerate, and he switched lanes again to skirt around a few slow drivers.
“Yes, sir,” I repeated.
Master Lyon didn’t seem the least bit regretful. “And you’re probably more…tense than usual.”
I stared at my hands in my lap, embarrassed that I’d let my true emotions bubble to the surface. “I’m not sure what you mean, sir.”
His low chuckle told me he didn’t buy it. Then quicker than I could see, he’d reached across my seat and between my legs, teasing the sensitive spot I’d forgotten craved his attention. “Why must you insist on playing dumb, Fawn?”
Even through the underwear, I felt the heat spreading, emanating from his fingertips and fanning out into my core. Within seconds he’d brought me back to the place he’d dangled me before. I gripped the armrest with one hand as the other clung to the door handle. I prayed he would grant me the escape, the fleeting moment of nothing.
Drawing a gasp from my lungs, he slid aside the fabric and plunged into me. I cried out, unsure whether it hurt; unsure it mattered. He could make me feel when I was numb to everything else.
Then all too soon, he withdrew from me, leaving me panting and frustrated again. He sucked his fingers into his mouth, making sure I watched as he tasted me. As an afterthought, I fixed my clothes, trying not to show how disappointed I was that he had left me on edge again.
“I thought so,” he whispered, grinning in my direction.
As I sat up, I realized just how aroused he’d made me. Before I had the underwear completely pulled up, his hand shot out again, palm open and waiting.
“Give them to me.”
I stared at him in shock, wondering if he was joking. His smile was a challenge, but he was completely serious. This was a test; he wanted to see if I’d comply.
“W-what about the seat, sir?” My cheeks grew hot at my weak attempt at stalling.
Master Lyon shrugged, but it was exaggerated, amused. “You’ll just have to clean it up,” he said like it was obvious. His hand stretched toward me, resting on my thigh. “Surely you can keep your thoughts pure until we stop.”
I glared at him but couldn’t help the tiny smile. He’d seen how distracted I was all day, and it was now that he chose to focus on me. Though it was a difficult order to follow, I relinquished my undergarments, which he stuffed into his back pocket.
“Now,” he said, settling back behind the wheel, “why don’t you tell me all the naughty things you did while I was away.”
“I assume your Owner has left you unattended,” Gregor had said over Marius’ phone. “You’re being very naughty…”
My Owner took my silence as hesitation, grazing my bare knee. “You aren’t in trouble for that. I would just like to know.” As his hand floated back to th
e steering wheel, he gave me a tiny smile. “It appears you two got along well.”
He was trying to put me at ease, keep me talking. In addition, my Owner wanted to watch me squirm with the effort it took to talk about what Marius and I did without losing the game. It had to be painful for him, speaking of the man who’d been captured because of me, but it appeared he liked having something to focus on as well.
My mind wandered back to that day we’d spent together, the marks his mouth had left behind already fading too fast. What we’d shared was private, pure. Describing it out loud made it something that had taken place in the past; something that would never occur again.
I couldn’t cry. Master Lyon would suspect I knew the truth at the slightest inclination, but that didn’t make it any less difficult to force the words out of my mouth. He seemed to think it was because I was embarrassed, but that was only part of it.
“I assume it happened sometime after I called you. When you wouldn’t answer your phone.” He wasn’t going to let this go, and my thighs pressed together as he shifted his gaze to me. “Was it your idea?”
I blinked a few times. “How did you know?”
There was no use denying it. Every clue added up.
He shrugged. “I know you, Fawn.”
I tried to concentrate on something besides the way he’d said that. Like I was completely transparent; he could see right through me. Twisting my fingers against my leg, I tested how far I could rotate my wrist without it hurting. “Yes, sir,” I relented. “It was my idea.”
Master Lyon seemed satisfied—I wasn’t going to argue.
“I knelt in front of him and he just let me,” I said, leaving out the fact that he was moving up our flights at the time. I recalled the warmth and strength of him. How even as Marius was distracted, he managed to soothe the raging sea of emotions within me.