by A. m Madden
Predictably, my cheeks blazed when the man’s knowing chuckle followed us. Proud of himself, Shane grinned and dragged me and my suitcase across the lobby. The moment the elevator doors slid closed caused my lips to tingle for his. Almost as if he knew, I received a side glance but nothing else.
All bets were off once I unlocked the door. He hauled me even faster through the apartment, right to my bedroom. Along the way, he tossed his sunglasses and kicked off his shoes.
“Alone at last.” With one swift twist of the lock, he propped my bag in the corner, tossed the backpack in my grip, and pounced. “My cock has been hard for you all week, Liv,” he admitted shamelessly and pulled my T-shirt over my head.
“Then I guess you should do something about it.”
“I have every intention to.” His lips were on the swell of my breast before I could respond. And once they sucked my nipple through the satin, the response I would’ve voiced died on my tongue. He skimmed his mouth over the exposed parts of me before landing on my earlobe. Meanwhile, his hands went to work getting my shorts down my legs, where I aided the process by kicking them off.
With my back still against the door, using it as leverage, he gripped my thighs and lifted me. “As much as I want to lick every inch of you, I need to fuck you first.” That announcement led to him unbuttoning his jeans, reaching in to take hold of his cock, and using it to push aside my panties.
“Oh. My. God,” I said as every inch of him slowly slid into me.
“Fuck, Liv. I may come within seconds.”
I wasn’t quite there yet, but each piston of his hips against mine brought me much closer. As if sensing that my climb trailed his, he moved one hand between us and circled in just the right spot. Instantly, I was right there with him. And my bucking between his hard body and the hard wood behind me proved I may have sprinted ahead in the final stretch. During it all, our tethered eyes practically crackled with electricity.
“Shane,” I rasped out between heavy breaths, gripping the back of his neck for more leverage. He nodded and grunted his way throughout my orgasm. Determined, Shane increased his speed with each thrust until he stilled to come deep inside me. Once done, our joint gasps for air were the only sounds echoing around us in my room.
The first words he uttered after that very long pause were, “Now that we got that out of the way… I have another surprise for you.”
He pulled out of me, the loss immediately felt, and set me down as I tilted my head and asked, “What?”
A weird expression crossed over his face when he gripped the back neckline of his T-shirt with one hand and dragged it over his head. At first, I expected he was about to continue our sexcapade for a slower round two… that was, until my eyes raked over his naked torso. It took a moment to register the inked outline of a bass guitar over his heart, with the body of it in the shape of an A.
My mouth gaped while I tentatively skimmed over it with a whisper of my touch. “You got a tattoo?”
His smirk came before a nod. “Yeah… of the two things I love the most.” I couldn’t believe he’d done that for me, and my surprise stunned me silent. “We all got one. Do you like it?” he prompted when I hadn’t said anything else.
“Are you kidding? I love it.” That was by far the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.
His unsure expression morphed into a heated stare. “I love you, Liv. You’ll always be a part of me… forever.” There was no levity in his eyes, no humor, as the green and gray flecks I loved so much seared and ignited every fiber of my being.
“Kiss me.” He slowly brought his lips down to mine. This kiss wasn’t rushed or frantic. It was slow and deliberate. It was everything.
With our mouths connected, he easily lifted and carried me to my bed. Placing me down, he then began loving me with more than just those familiar words he had proclaimed.
Fooling around always made Shane hungry. As he sat at the island, filling in the blanks about the debacle Chase had arranged for them to play in LA, I heated up a plate loaded with my mom’s leftover paella.
“It kind of scared me,” he admitted for the first time.
“The crowd?”
“Yeah, that… but more the being used part.” Surprised by his comment, I studied his handsome face. “That chick didn’t know me, yet she and her dad had no problem capitalizing on my name. It pissed me off more than anything. I’ll always wonder if offers I get are genuine or not.”
“You had every right to be pissed off, Shane.” Waiting for the microwave to beep, I leaned across the granite and took his hand. “And when the time comes, you’ll have a support team to help you weed out the assholes.”
“Will I? People talk a good game, but that doubt will always be my life, Liv. It’s my reality. I’ll forever wonder if it’s my talent or my last name that gets me anywhere in my career.”
“You’re a prodigy, Shane. You were able to master the greatest rock songs by the age of ten. Your name may open the door, but your talent will most definitely push you through it.” Not looking convinced, he lifted our hands and kissed mine. I meant every word and hated he doubted his gift. “Tell me about playing in Santa Monica.”
Instantly, his face lit up. “Fucking fantastic, Liv. I’d never experienced a high like that. And if the guys had been into it, it would’ve been so much better. The crowd loved us. So different than playing in New York, where the people watching seem bored.”
“I wish I was there.” The ding announcing his food was ready forced me to pull away, and that prevented him from seeing my doubts through my expression. Doubts that he shouldn’t be cooped up in classrooms in a few weeks but instead should be out there doing his thing.
“Me too.” When I grabbed his dish and slid it across the island, he seemed lost in thought.
“Earth to Shane.”
“Oh… thanks, baby. I’m starving.” He instantly shoveled a forkful into his mouth, as though the last conversation had never happened. Suppressing the urge to keep him talking, I instead watched amused as he huffed through the intense heat inside his mouth and swallowed. “Shit, your mom is such a great cook. You need to take lessons from her.”
“Your mom is also a great cook.”
“You’re right; she is. I’ll have her give you lessons too.” He winked before shoving more rice and seafood into his face. It was true. Although we’d both grown up with housekeepers, our moms enjoyed cooking most of the time.
“Tell me about your week,” he said between mouthfuls. I took the stool beside him, watching as he plowed through his snack. “What really went on with Kim?”
He knew most of it… kind of. It had been hard to talk when Kim and I had been together all week, except for rushed conversations during her showers. And it hadn’t helped when she had asked me not to tell Shane. But knowing how difficult that was for me, she had lifted her request on our way home, knowing he’d be getting Chase’s version soon enough.
“Well, she regretted not breaking up with Chase before our trip. She feels since it’s going to happen anyway, why prolong the inevitable?”
Shane nodded. “In not so many words, Chase felt the same way.” His forehead creased a bit when he added, “If I hadn’t been there, I’m not sure what he would’ve done.” Shane gave me a rundown on the nonsense that Chase had pulled in LA, and how it had continued even once they’d returned to New York.
“Did he cheat on her?” My tone made it quite clear how I felt about that possibility.
“No…” Shane’s eyes sliced away when he added, “But he came so close a few times he may as well have.”
“That idiot.”
“I know.” The way he avoided my gaze worried me, and I suspected there was something he’d held back. I could only guess what those boys had engaged in last weekend. Shane was the only one in a truly committed relationship, and I had a feeling he had to deal with much more than he let on.
When I snuggled against him, he kissed the top of my head. “Maybe it’s Chase’s way of
protecting his heart.” Really, it wasn’t much different than what Kim had tried to do on her end.
“Maybe.” Throwing an arm around me, he pulled me closer. “They’ll figure it out.”
“She’s over there right now ending it. I can’t tell you how many times she said she feels guilty ruining our summer.”
“That’s ridiculous. Why would she think that?”
“Well, for starters, if you guys play in the city, she doesn’t want to go,” I said, and his brows rose in understanding.
“And without her, you won’t have fun.” It wasn’t a question. Sure, I’d have Harrison’s girlfriend to hang out with, unless he also planned to become single soon. And Ashley was sweet… but she wasn’t Kim.
“I’d be there for you,” I said without hesitation. “It’ll just feel strange.”
“I know it will.” He gripped my chin to force my eyes on him. “This is on them, babe. Although sad, we knew this was coming… and it has nothing to do with us.” He was right. I couldn’t relate to any of it and felt bad for them, but it had nothing to do with me and Shane.
“We have each other, and that’s all that matters.”
“Exactly.” His lips pressed to mine for a long, hard kiss. “We could use some space from all of them. We should spend more time at the beach this summer. My parents are cool with it, and I think if I have a long talk with your dad, then he’ll stop his stupid game of pretending you’re still a virgin.”
“Um… he knows.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“No…” I said hesitantly. “He’s just busting you, but I like your idea. What about playing at bars in the city with No Rulz?” I asked, wondering what had changed.
“They aren’t into it, so it’s a waste of my time.”
“But you said the festival went well. Did something else happen?”
“Like I said… I loved every minute of it, and we got a great response from the crowd. But all the guys wanted to do was party afterward with—” His eyes cut away.
“With girls they met?” I filled in the blank. “Even Harrison?”
“Yeah. The three of them. I didn’t stick around and took a cab back to Lori’s place.”
A pang of something squeezed inside my chest. Again… a tiny seed of doubt pinched on whether it was Shane’s way to avoid temptation, and I hated even thinking that. These thoughts that kept popping up had nothing to do with trusting him. For some reason, I couldn’t shake the ever-present feeling he had missed out on so much because of me. The fact that his three best friends were all looking to get laid this summer was bad enough, but come August he would be attending a school in the city he really couldn’t give a crap about attending if it weren’t for me.
“It could’ve been better if we were all there for the same reason,” he went on to say, but one look at me forced a scowl. “Hey, what’s with the frown?”
“No reason.”
My response didn’t convince him. “Liv.”
“Things are changing, that’s all… for all of us. Soon we’ll be in college, and new opportunities will present themselves. We need to stay open minded.”
“Open minded about what?” He cocked his head. “Nothing is changing for you and me. I don’t care what they want or what they do, it has no effect on us,” he claimed, misinterpreting my words. I wasn’t referring to Kim or Chase or anyone else. My concern had all to do with Shane beginning a new phase in his life that he’d been pushed into. Seeing the energy rolling off him by merely talking about that festival hit on my concern that he’d regret committing to NYU.
Still, now wasn’t the time to get into that with him. I hadn’t seen him in a week, and the last thing I wanted was to pick a fight. Ignoring the way his hazel eyes studied me, I kissed him softly. “I missed you.”
He paused before saying, “I missed you too, baby.”
But I knew that he knew something was on my mind.
Chapter Thirteen
Shane
Not only had Chase and Kim broken up, but Harrison and Ashley had as well.
That meant my three best friends had a whole new view on how to spend their summer. For several reasons, their plans didn’t mesh with mine. I had no desire to stay in the hot city, bouncing from party to party, or from one underage-friendly bar to another. Alivia mentioned a few times that she’d be fine if I wanted to hang out with them.
I didn’t.
If they focused their energy on No Rulz, I might have entertained it. The only thing those three were interested in was the pussy hunt they’d been on this past week.
I’d rather spend every day I had before starting college with my hot girl on a hot beach, and if possible, finding a new band.
The last one would be tricky. It was summer, and things were quiet on the performing front. Come the first semester, I’d get serious looking for their replacements, a serious group of musicians who had the same goals I had.
My parents kept reminding me of the connections within reach. There might be a time I regretted not using them, but I still wanted to try to pave my own way… try being the operative word.
Meanwhile, I’d been playing with Trey a lot, keeping up with his riffs and coming up with my own on the fly. He said a true bassist needed to be able to create in the moment. I was there because of him. The man had always been my hero, and I his protégé. I couldn’t blame him for being a dick after I began dating his daughter. What man wouldn’t be?
But sometime in the last few weeks, he’d stopped treating me as a kid who was doing his baby, and back to the kid he considered a second son… plus the ball-busting at every turn. Being called a prick, a cocksucker, or even a worthless piece of shit by Trey was a compliment. That was just the way he showed his love for his best friends… except my mom. He and Mom had a unique relationship. Besides his wife and daughter, the next female in line for his heart was Mom.
Miraculously, he finally allowed Alivia to stay with me down the Shore. Maybe having Edna there gave him a false sense of security? Or the more believable scenario was that Camilla or even my mother had ripped into him. Whatever. The main thing was he’d backed off, and because he had, I got to be alone with my girl at my parents’ house, loving beach life.
Together day in and out, swimming, lounging, and fucking at our whim… well, not completely at our whim. The fucking had to be coordinated in the middle of the night or when Edna ran an errand. Still, it was goddamn heaven.
Today my family was on the way to the beach house for the weekend while Alivia and I were in my BMW X5 heading back to the city. I rarely got to drive and found it relaxing. Alivia, on the other hand, hated it. She had gotten her license mainly because I persuaded her to.
The need to head home had to do with a launch party No Rulz was booked to play tonight. Some rich dude owned the fashion magazine Harrison’s mother worked for, and she had hooked us up months ago.
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t convince Alivia to come. With no Kim or Ashley, she didn’t feel comfortable tagging along. She hadn’t seen her best friend since they’d gotten home last Saturday and thought it would be good to have a night in with Kim.
When a light drizzle began to fall through the open sunroof, I pushed the button to close it as Alivia turned on the air-conditioning.
“Here comes the rain.” It was supposed to pour most of the day. “Hopefully it’ll help the sweltering heat in the city.” She shifted the vent until the cold air caused her hair to billow around her head. I missed her curls but loved the feel of those silky strands through my fingers.
“At least we’re making great time,” I said above the music playing. We’d been coasting up the parkway for an hour now as the southbound lanes heading to the beach crawled on the other side of the concrete barrier.
“I should text my dad to tell him I’ll be home in time for lunch.”
She pulled out her phone, and before she could even bring it to life, I barked, “The hell you will.” Yes, her parents would
be home, but my apartment was nice and empty. “If they aren’t expecting us until later—”
“You are Mr. One-Track Mind,” she accused.
“I own that title proudly.” Reaching over, I grabbed her hand. “It’s your fault, really… being hot and sexy all the time.” Grinning at her audible huff, I expected a smart-ass retort any moment. When none came and she twisted her head away, I knew something was bothering her. “Baby, what’s wrong?” She’d been sullen all week, and I ignored it, knowing it probably had to do with her period coming.
Her head swung my way and she smiled. “Nothing.” But her crystal-blue eyes told another story.
“You’re lying to me.” She pulled her hand from mine and paused, so I pushed. “Liv?”
“I’m worried about you.”
“Me? Why?”
Her shoulders rose in a shrug. “I just don’t want you to have any regrets.”
What the hell was she talking about? “What would I regret?” Her silence prompted me to assume. “Regret us?”
“Well, no,” she said, seeming affronted and making me feel like an ass. “But I guess since you mentioned it, then yes… that too.”
“I feel like you’re talking in code.” My annoyance was clear when I focused back on the road. “Where the hell is this coming from? I got the same vibe as the day you came home from Martha’s Vineyard. It feels like something is on your mind, and you keep dropping hints before backpedaling. Stop playing games, Liv. What is bothering you?”
“Fine… you want to know? I’ll tell you. I worry you’ll regret going to NYU because of me. I saw how your face lit up when you talked about the festival in LA and don’t want to hold you back—”
“Hold me back how?”
“From your dream, Shane. I don’t have a doubt in my mind you won’t achieve it. Your talent makes it inevitable. But everything you do is to please someone else. You’re hanging out with me so much because your friends are all single now. You’re not playing like you wanted to because you’re dependent on your band. You’re going to school because your parents want you to. You chose NYU because I’m going there. It’s all because of someone else. I don’t want you to regret your choices.”