“I’m sorry, Beth.” More stupid tears. “I should never have put you in that position—”
“Hush, it’s all right. There are some things that the men don’t need to know.”
“Such as?”
Neither of them had noticed Alex’s silent return to the main lounge—he’d gone to check on Cam but was now standing a few feet away, arms folded across his chest and with a face like thunder to accompany his glacial tone. Given the military-style dress and the evidence of the battle to rescue Cam, his appearance was all the more intimidating.
Beth stood up and faced her husband, her chin lifted in a show of stubbornness. “The relative merits of one designer handbag compared to another, of course. How’s Cam?”
“Beth, don’t. Don’t even think you can divert my attention by asking about Cam. What don’t I need to know?”
“Alex, this isn’t the time or the place—”
“Perhaps so—for now. But if you think for one moment that I’m going to let this slide, sweetheart, you are sadly mistaken. We are not done with this conversation.” Having made his position clear, Alex let his attitude ease up a little. “Dr. Nassar’s working on Cam now. He’s had some pain relief, they’re getting him something to eat, and then he’s going to sleep—the doctor’s going to make sure of that. For now, though, there’s nothing we can do apart from wait.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “All I can suggest is that you take a leaf out of Ros’ book and get some rest.” He glanced towards the exhausted woman who was still asleep in one of the large comfortable seats.
Beth moved closer to her husband, lifted a hand to cradle his cheek. “You look like hell,” she said without preamble. “Stacie, will you be all right for a few minutes, while I help Alex get cleaned up?”
“Of course. I’ll be fine—you go.”
Stacie watched them leave, realising belatedly, as she heard Beth asking her husband if he was all right, that she hadn’t yet thanked him for what he’d done. Still, there was an eight-hour flight ahead of them—plenty of time to express her gratitude.
An hour or so later, the doctor came into the main cabin. Stacie instinctively reached for Beth’s hand, while Alex went to meet him. Ros too was instantly awake.
“How is he, Dr. Nassar?”
“Better than he looks, Mr. Lombard. He’s dehydrated and undernourished, as I’m sure you’re aware. His visible injuries are not as bad as they look—they are mostly superficial, although he has sustained fractures to his ribs. With what they appear to have done to him, internal injuries are a possibility, but the indicators for that so far are negative. Were it otherwise, I’d recommend turning back for immediate hospitalisation. He’s on a drip now to rehydrate him, with intravenous analgesia for the pain and antibiotics to counter any infection from his wounds and the insect bites.
“He’s also had a little to eat, we’ve cleaned him up, and he’s now sleeping, which frankly is the best thing for him at the present time. I would like him to be checked up in a hospital—x-rays and so forth. To that end, His Highness has arranged for an ambulance to meet us when we land, to convey Mr. Fraser to a private clinic. His Highness said that in the circumstances, it was the least he could do.”
“Shokran. Thank you, Dr. Nassar.”
“May I see him? Please?”
Coming to stand by the side of Alex, Stacie couldn’t wait any longer. She’d listened intently to the doctor, but she wanted…no, needed to reassure herself that Cam was all right.
“As I said, Miss Matheson, he’s asleep now, so he won’t be able to talk to you.”
Given the vitriol of his earlier outburst, it was probably better for her that he couldn’t. “That doesn’t matter. I’d just like to sit with him for a while, if I may?”
With a growing sense of trepidation, Stacie pushed the door open, trying to make as little noise as possible. The doctor’s assistant, who had been sitting with Cam, rose and gave her an understanding smile. As he passed her on his way out, he whispered that he would be outside if she needed anything.
For all that it was like looking at a stranger, Stacie instinctively recognised the battered form of the man she still thought of as her Master—even though it was the last thing he wanted. His breathing was shallow and slightly raspy, possibly due to the damage to his ribs that the doctor had mentioned. His hair was scruffy and dishevelled and the three weeks’ worth of beard made him look like a stranger, but it was his general condition that broke her heart. The weight loss was more than merely noticeable, not to mention the bruises, the patched-up cuts, and what looked like a multitude of insect bites. One thing was for sure—the doctor’s definition of superficial differed vastly from hers.
It was all her fault. She’d done this to him. He’d gone to that place because of her.
“Oh Cam,” she whispered, taking a seat beside the bed. “Would it have made any difference if I’d told you how I feel?”
She slipped one hand under his and began to stroke the back of his fingers. The nails were broken, the cuticles damaged and bloody…in spite of its condition, it was still the strong hand of her Master—a hand that had taught her of the pleasure to be found in pain, in giving up control, in trusting and loving a man such as Cam.
The memories, the feelings…all of it was overwhelming. On impulse, she raised his hand to kiss the back of it, and then touched her forehead gently to the scraped knuckles.
Please let him be all right.
If only things could have been different. She remembered his reaction to her presence at the conference centre, and the strict instruction not to do anything like that again. How the hell would he have reacted to her being here if they’d still been a couple? She probably would have needed a soft cushion to sit on for a month at least. She’d have given anything to have that, in place of the venomous words he’d spat at her a short time ago.
If they were still a couple, she’d have the right to be there and stay with him—she’d watch over him until the plane landed and she’d go to the hospital with him. When he was discharged, she’d drive him home and take care of him until he was fully recovered.
Reality, though, dictated otherwise. Although the doctor had said that he’d be unconscious for a while yet, she couldn’t risk staying much longer in case he woke up unexpectedly. She’d taken his rejection twice already—she didn’t want to be on the receiving end a third time.
Having stayed for as long as she dared, very slowly Stacie stood up, her eyes fixed on Cam as she did so, drinking him in for what felt like the last time. Her heart ached to take care of him as he’d taken care of her when she had the flu, but that just wasn’t going to happen. In a few short hours, the plane would land, he’d be whisked off to hospital…and she’d never see him again. At least she’d had this, though the circumstances couldn’t be much worse. She bent to kiss his cheek.
“Goodbye, Master.”
Two words—that was all it took to shatter her heart into a million razor-sharp fragments. It would never be whole again. A few steps took her to the door. She opened it, and walked away from everything she’d ever wanted.
Had she stayed a little longer, she might have heard the low groan that Cam gave in his sleep. She might even have imagined that the single word he moaned was her name.
~~*~~
By the time the plane landed, Alex and Ros had cleaned up properly and changed back into civilian clothes. Apart from a few visible cuts and bruises, no one would have suspected that they’d been doing anything other than making a brief business trip out of the country.
The Customs and Immigration formalities were, of necessity, brief—the ambulance was waiting to take Cam to the private clinic. Alex accompanied him, which left Beth and Stacie to make their way back to Winterleigh in the Range Rover. On arriving there, Stacie saw no reason to delay her own departure for London and home.
“I need to go back to work anyway,” she explained to Beth as she stowed her bags in her own car. “Please, would you do something for me
?”
“Of course, anything. Are you sure you won’t stay another few days?”
She shook her head. “I can’t, Beth. I know you think he didn’t mean what he said on the plane, but I believe he did. Please…would you just let me know how he’s doing—when he’s all right?”
Beth gave her a hug. “You know I will. And Stacie, you’re always welcome here, no matter what.”
Yes, she knew that, just as she knew that it was highly unlikely she’d ever again see the beautiful house and the people who owned it. This time, it really was goodbye.
Chapter 17
“What the hell were you thinking?”
Alex looked up from the papers he was reading, to see Cam standing in the doorway to his office. The other man had been staying at Winterleigh since his discharge from the clinic a few days ago. He had to admit that his friend was looking a lot better already, although the man could still stand to regain a little more weight.
It didn’t stop him spoiling for a fight, though. This sounded like it was going to be the confrontation Alex had been expecting. He very carefully set the document down on his desk. “What the hell was I thinking about what?”
“Beth and Stacie—on the plane. Especially Stacie. You know we’re no longer involved.”
“Yes, I know,” Alex acknowledged calmly. He indicated the chair on the opposite side of the desk. “Do you want to sit down before you fall down?”
“I’m fine.” In spite of his declaration, Cam pushed himself away from the doorframe and took up the invitation. “So?”
Alex gave a humourless bark of laughter and sighed. “They were safe—they stayed on the plane throughout.”
“They shouldn’t have been there in the first place!”
“You try telling that to your sub, Cam—”
“She’s not my bloody sub. Will you get that through your thick skull?”
Unruffled by his friend’s outburst, Alex quirked an eyebrow. “Are you sure about that?”
“Yes, I’m fucking sure. She was hurt because of me. She’s safer without me in her life. I had no choice.”
The statement took Alex back almost a year and a half, when Cam had urged him to send Beth away for her own safety while they resolved the situation with the late—very late—Ewan Underwood. The man was nothing if not consistent, Alex had to grant him that.
“Anyway, I didn’t come here for a therapy session, Alex.” Even though he’d only just sat down, Cam stood up again. “Thanks for putting me up, but I need to get back to London and back on the job.”
Alex knew it was no good arguing—all he could do was try to make it a little easier for his friend. “Stay for lunch and I’ll give you a ride back to town,” he offered.
Cam shook his head. “Thanks, Alex, but I need to get going. I’ve called a cab to take me to the station—with luck I can be at Waterloo before one.”
“Cam—”
“It’s okay, Alex…I’m okay.”
~~*~~
Beth frowned. “He’s gone back to London already? Without saying goodbye?”
“He’s a grown man, sweetheart. He doesn’t have to answer to anyone.”
She flopped onto the seat vacated half an hour earlier by the man about whom they were talking. Her mouth compressed into a thin line, and then she gave a strangled squeal of frustration.
“What’s the matter now? Plot not going well?”
She gave her husband one of her looks. “The plot in my book is going fine, thank you very much—at least there, people do what I want them to do!”
Alex sat back with a long-suffering sigh. “You’re doing the fairy godmother thing again—put the wand down and back away slowly. You can’t fix the world.”
“But this is Cam and Stacie!”
He stood up and held out his hand. “Come with me—I think we’d better discuss this somewhere more comfortable.”
With her hand enclosed in her husband’s, Beth accompanied him to the family room, where he sat down on the sofa and pulled her down beside him.
“Beth, don’t interfere. You have to let them work it out for themselves.”
“And if they never work it out? Alex, they belong together!”
“Don’t interfere!”
She looked at Alex as if he were a complete stranger. “And if that mugger hadn’t interfered? If I hadn’t been attacked…would we be here, now, like this?”
“That’s different—”
Beth slowly shook her head. “It’s not so different, Alex. I’d been working for you for three years, and in all that time I had no idea that you viewed me as anything other than your assistant—and even if I had, I couldn’t have done anything about it because I’d have been scared of being wrong and having to leave my job…and you. But you…you could have done something but you didn’t, not until I needed help. Cam and Stacie need help, Alex, otherwise they’ll never—”
“Beth, they have to find their own way. Leave it!”
She pressed her lips together. What she was about to do went against everything that she believed in. “I can’t, Alex,” she said quietly. She closed her eyes briefly, trying to marshal her thoughts. “You already know I’ve been keeping something from you. Stacie swore me to secrecy, but I can’t just stand by while they throw everything away. Not after what they’ve both gone through.”
Alex’s silence drew her gaze back to him.
“Both? Is this to do with the conversation I interrupted aboard the plane?” His expression was as grave as the tone of his voice.
She’d known he wouldn’t miss that—he never missed anything. “Both,” Beth confirmed softly, “and yes, it is. When I bumped into Stacie and we had lunch together—the day we found out about Cam—I got the feeling, while we were talking, that there was something wrong. Although she was reluctant to tell me, she didn’t take much persuading either, and then she made me promise not to say anything to you or Cam about it.”
Alex wrapped his arms around her. “I knew something was going on.”
And he’d been giving her a chance to come clean about it. “I’m sorry, Alex. I wanted to tell you, but I couldn’t break my word, not then, and then we got word about Cam. While we were waiting for you to bring him back to us, I tried to convince her to tell him but she won’t.”
“So what is this big secret? Tell me, Beth.”
Why did Doms all have that certain tone, the one that a sub could never resist? Beth had heard Cam use it on more than one occasion, but it was her husband’s voice that had the greatest impact. Even so, she still struggled to find the right words. Were there any right words? Would it affect Alex as much as it had affected her? Beth leaned her head against her husband’s shoulder, needing his strength as much as she wanted to give him hers, for what she was about to tell him.
“Stacie was pregnant, Master,” she whispered. “She found out when she was caught in the car bomb. It was a complete surprise, but Cam ended their relationship before she had a chance to tell him…and then a few weeks ago, she lost the baby.”
Her heart ached when Alex’s arms tightened around her…giving comfort, not asking for it…again. She heard him curse under his breath.
“Christ, I had no idea. Is she all right?”
“She says she is, physically, but if it were me…I’d need more time to recover emotionally as well. I think she does, too. She doesn’t even have Cam to share it with. Alex, wouldn’t you want to know if it was me? If that happened to us?”
She felt him move, knew that he was kissing the top of her head. His voice was unusually gruff when he spoke. “Yes—but then I wouldn’t be the stupid prick who pushed the woman he loved out of his life.”
~~*~~
A few days later, Beth was on the train to London again. She had it on good authority that Cam, still recovering from the injuries to his ribs, would be at his apartment, so that was where she was heading. Amazingly, her husband hadn’t tried to dissuade her from this course of action, so now she was determined to do
her utmost to give one of her closest friends and the woman he loved—no matter what he said—the happy ending they deserved. Together.
She sighed. Doing this for characters in her books was so much easier.
A cab took her to Cam’s riverside apartment. She’d been there more times than she could remember, and as Cam had a set of keys for Winterleigh, so she and Alex had the same for his place. She let herself in the main entrance and made her way up to his apartment.
The building reminded her a lot of the place Alex used to keep in the city. It was in a prime location by the river, came with a seven-figure price tag, and had all the welcoming comfort of an upmarket hotel chain. Cam really needed to find that house close to Winterleigh. He was the nearest thing to family that she and Alex had, and it would be good to have him living nearby—preferably with Stacie.
Beth glared at the door to Cam’s apartment. Although she had the key, she chose instead to ring the bell.
Battle was about to commence.
“What the—Beth! Come on in, I just made coffee.”
After giving him a careful hug, she followed Cam into the apartment and made herself comfortable on the sofa, while he prepared a second mug. When he came back with the drinks, she patted the seat beside her. “Come and sit down here, with me.”
“Okay.” Cam made himself comfortable, leaning back in the corner of the sofa with one arm resting along the back of it and his right ankle resting on his left thigh. “Something tells me you have something on your mind, angel.” He sipped his coffee. “Everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine, thanks, and I do have something on my mind.” Beth decided to get straight to the point. It never did to prevaricate with a Dom. “It’s about Stacie.”
And bang, up went the man’s defences. Beth felt almost physically rebuffed, but she wasn’t about to let it put her off. She was a sub, and she was made of sterner stuff than that.
“Angel, I don’t need to hear about Stacie. We had a brief fling, we split up—end of story.”
Love Is Danger (Club Aegis Book 3) Page 26