by Leslie North
She clawed at him, still needing more of him. And really, this was the worst sign of all. She could have him, be filled by him, be consumed by him, and still need more? This was supposed to be the last time to sate her forever. The final sip of cool water before she wanted back out into the desert.
But maybe it would never be enough.
When their kisses finally slowed, Jackie swallowed a thick knot in her throat. Damn it all, the L word was dangling on her lips. Begging to be spoken. But she’d never allow it.
“How was that for round one?” Daniel asked, smiling as he brushed his lips across her forehead.
She laughed as he gently lowered her to the ground, but the tears were there. And this time, there was no blinking them away.
Shit shit shit. She didn’t know what to do. At the very least, she wanted to come across as the strong independent woman she’d always been. The woman who didn’t completely dissolve because she fell for a man she couldn’t keep over the course of a week.
She wiped away a tear that had spilled and headed for the bedroom, sniffing hard.
“You okay, princess?” Daniel’s voice sounded lazy. Sated.
“I’m just gonna get into my pajamas,” she said, heading for the walk-in closet. She squeezed out a few tears there in the quiet of the closet—hoping that she’d get them out of her system and could then return to their evening and enjoy what little time they had left.
She fumbled with the zipper of her dress, the tears blurring her attempts to unzip it. She sighed, pausing to wipe at her eyes and really focus. But the struggle only made her more upset. She had so much more of this to look forward to—crying without any ability to control it while she nursed a broken heart, post-Daniel.
“Jackie.” Daniel’s baritone appeared at her ear and he deftly undid the zipper and spun her around, cupping her face in his hands. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head, embarrassed that he caught her like this. “Uh, really good orgasm?”
A smile flickered at his lips, but he didn’t release her. “Wanna talk about it?”
Not really. She gnawed on the inside of her lips, avoiding his gaze. “I was kinda hoping we could just go lay down.”
He nodded, retreating from the walk-in closet. That’s when she noticed he was still naked. Dammit, she was ruining this sexy last night together. She drew a fortifying breath, slipping out of her dress before carefully re-hanging it and tugging on a tank top. She’d bypass the booty shorts, since she still planned to have at least a little more fun.
Daniel was lying on the bed, an arm propped behind his head, his gaze waiting for her. The sight of him, sprawled out and waiting for her, completely comfortable in the nude, helped erase some of her sadness—or at least cover it up with other, more enjoyable thoughts.
She climbed onto the big bed and cozied up to him. He draped his arm around her shoulders, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. A comfortable silence settled between them.
Until finally Daniel spoke.
“You let me know when you feel better so I can get on with my evil plan.”
A giggle rolled out of her. She nuzzled into his side, an insistent thump in her chest urging her to speak. To share something, finally.
“I’m just going to miss you,” she whispered, dragging her finger along the ridge of his abs.
“I’ll be back before too long—it’s just a two-week trip,” he said. “And we’ll pick up where we left off.”
His words didn’t placate her. They only reinforced the sad truth lurking behind his meaning.
“But how long will you be back for?”
He was quiet for a moment. “A few days.”
“And then?”
“It depends on what comes up.”
Not helpful. Or even slightly reassuring. “So I’ll just be your house sitter in the meantime, and then when you come back…”
He tutted. “No, Jackie. Think of it as less house-sitting and more house-living.”
He was trying to make her feel better—she could tell. But that just made things worse. So she was meant to be the hired help during his trips, and the girlfriend all the rest of the time.
“So like, 95% house sitter, 5% girlfriend.”
He looked down at her. “I like the second part of that more. But change the number to 100%.”
His words warmed her, even though she didn’t want them to. “Fine. I guess I’ll feed your fish for free now. As long as you promise to interrupt me in the bath again when you get back next time.”
A laugh rocketed out of him. “Will you try to karate chop me again?”
“No guarantee.”
“No deal without the karate.”
She sighed. “Should have known better than to negotiate with a businessman.”
Daniel grinned, running his thumb over her knuckles. “So we have a deal.” After a long, sweet kiss, he added, “And I’ll see about popping in during the halfway mark of my trip. If I can rearrange a few things, I might be able to come back for a day, maybe two. Just to see you.”
Jackie smiled, but she could feel it wavering.
So possibly four or five days out of a month.
Would that be enough?
16
Despite the sadness she felt, Jackie couldn’t help responding when Daniel sat up, raking his hungry gaze over her body. He tugged at the hem of her tank top, and she sat up so that he could tear it off of her.
“I don’t even know why you bothered with clothes,” he murmured before dipping down to bite at a nipple. “You know I’m just going to toss all of this across the room.”
“Maybe I like watching you do it.” She grinned as he focused on her panties next. She wriggled her hips as he pulled them down her legs, eventually tossing them to join her shirt on the floor.
“Understandable.” He propped himself up on an elbow, parked right at hip-level. He eyed her pussy like it was time for dessert. “Hopefully you’ll like watching me do what I have planned next.”
A shiver raced through her. Of course she’d love watching it. She’d be replaying it in her head for the next decade or more.
Daniel placed soft kisses over her hip bone, urging her legs apart with his chin as he sought the still-damp core of her. He swiped his tongue over her clit, which remained sensitive from their intense session at the door.
She sighed, melting back onto the bed. Of course Daniel had to make it hard to walk away.
“I just don’t want you to forget about me while I’m gone,” he murmured before covering the stiff peak of her clit with his lips.
“Impossible,” she groaned.
“Okay then, I want to make sure that when I come back, you’ll be ready for me.” He swiped his tongue across her folds, and then buried it inside her. She gasped, her legs going tense. He slurped at her, his tongue plunging deep inside her only to return to her clit. Over and over again. She moaned, her thighs forming a vice around his head.
“Mmm. There we go.” His hands joined the fun now. He pumped two fingers into her pussy while he lavished more attention on her clit. She rocked against him, relishing the friction and the sweet, unbroken attention. Her back arched as he buried his fingers deeper inside her.
“Daniel,” she breathed, “Please. I need it.”
“What, princess? Tell me.”
“You. Inside me.”
He sucked at her clit one last time before pushing onto his palms. He covered her with his body, his heavy cock immediately finding the crease of her pussy. He was fully hard again, and she was so close to the edge she could barely stand it. She just didn’t want to come again without feeling the blissful heat of him, buried to her core.
He slipped inside easily this time, his intense blue gaze stealing her breath. She couldn’t look away from him as he plunged himself inside her, beautifully slow and surprisingly sweet.
She palmed the flat planes of his chest, hooking her ankles behind him. Zeroing in on his eyes as if she could see to the depths of his
soul, hoping she might find answers there. His hidden truths, or buried desires. Anything that might convince her he might actually stay with her once he left for his business trip.
“Give it to me hard,” she whispered. Like maybe he could break something inside of her that would serve as the final souvenir of their time together. Too late. He’s already breaking your heart.
His eyes went hooded and he scooped his palms underneath her ass cheeks, hoisting her from the waist down. He groaned as he reached a new depth—a new angle altogether—and her heart raced, dangling on the precipice of another orgasm.
Daniel picked up an intense pace. Harder than any time they’d made love before. This time, he was really fucking her.
Her entire body jiggled each time he rocked into her, every inch of her skin taut with anticipation of the next climax. She reached out for something to grab, but only her nails grazed his abs.
“Open your eyes,” he said, his voice gritty.
She snapped them open, his cerulean gaze pinning her to the bed. The ache was back in her chest now, made worse by the divine pleasure between her legs.
This. Him. Them. She wanted it all. All the time.
She cried out then, her orgasm ripping through her like a fire. She burned and pulsed and ached all at the same time. Daniel kept up his pace, pounding into her, the muscles of his shoulders rippling.
“I’m close, princess,” he warned.
“Give it to me,” she moaned, relishing the last lovely remnants of her orgasm as he pounded into her. “Please, Daniel.”
He grunted and then a long, gravelly moan ripped out of him. He stilled, burying his face in the hollow of her neck as he came inside her. His abs spasmed a few times, the heat of his release filling her. It was a sensation she’d never experienced before, but oh, oh how this changed things. This was an intimacy she hadn’t even been able to fathom. The most carnal part of him, swimming inside her.
Daniel melted down on top of her, showering her with kisses. Each time together had been better than the last. Which meant that they needed to stop now, or else Jackie might never be able to recuperate from knowing Daniel.
“Oh, my God,” he murmured. “That was so fucking good.”
“How is the second orgasm of the day better than the first?” she asked, laughing weakly.
“It’s you. You make me like this.” He took a soft bite at her shoulder.
They stayed like that, in their sticky, sweaty cocoon, until Daniel finally rolled off of her. His cock was limp and he collapsed onto the bed, sighing contentedly.
“We’ll sleep well tonight,” she murmured, cozying up to him again.
“I don’t want to sleep just yet,” he said, but he already sounded like he was on his way. “If anything, I’ll just rest before we start round three.”
She snickered, nuzzling against his chest. They lay there for a while, not speaking, just being together. The sound of his heartbeat was a huge comfort. It grounded her in the post-coital emotional swirl.
But after enough time had gone by, she realized Daniel’s breathing had become very regular. And then at long last—there it was.
He was snoring.
She sat up, looking him over.
Daniel had fallen asleep.
She laughed to herself, heading to the bathroom to clean herself up. When she was done, she turned off the lights and slipped into bed beside Daniel. She snuggled back up to him, intent on falling asleep as well.
But sleep didn’t come. Despite all the glasses of wine, the general exhaustion that she usually felt after big public events like the wedding, and the outrageous sexual satisfaction…she couldn’t fall asleep.
She tossed and turned for what felt like hours, her mind running rampant with thoughts and questions and worries.
It was reassuring to know that Daniel intended to see her when he came back from his business trip. He’d said he wanted her to be his girlfriend and that was part of what she’d wanted to hear…but she knew how to read between the lines.
It wasn’t that she didn’t believe him when he said he wanted to be with her—she surely did. She just knew that if it worked the first time, it wasn’t going to work a second or third.
Their long-distance relationship—if that’s what he even wanted to shoot for—would be better named the occasional fuck buddy. Once a month, they bone until they bruise their pelvises. And then what?
Sooner or later, it would eventually, inevitably end. Because Daniel wasn’t destined to be hers. If she could make it be so, she would. But Daniel was only on loan to her. She’d gotten him for a week, but she’d been one of the lucky ones to have had even that much time. From everything he’d said, she had no illusions that he’d find himself with another week to lavish on a lover any time soon.
And with how hot and real and churning these emotions were inside her…his few-days-per-month promise was almost worse than nothing.
Just enough to remind her that she’d never have Daniel. Not fully. Not when he was married to his job and all the stress that came with it.
He would leave. Not just because of his job, but because in Jackie’s wild and starry-eyed week at Daniel’s side, she’d forgotten one, unchanging truth: everyone left.
It was just a matter of time. So she needed to save herself. She needed to do what was best.
Jackie sat up as the clock read one a.m. She’d spent the last couple hours lost in the downward spiral of her mind, but now, in this moment, the decision seemed clear.
If he was going to leave her sooner or later, no matter what she did, then she needed to leave first.
Her heart thumped while she moved through the darkened suite. She didn’t want him to wake up and see her here. She didn’t want an argument, and she would just rather avoid the questions. It was easier all around to escape now, leave a note, and avoid further contact. She’d have a better chance at closing the fissure in her heart if it ended that way. A clean break. A swift ending.
She tried to pack her luggage as quietly as possible, almost forgetting to put regular clothes on before slipping out of the suite. With her hand on the door handle, she paused, looking back inside. She should leave something behind. A note. Some explanation, at least. She left her bag blocking the doorway, propping the door open enough to give her enough light to see what she was writing, and hurried to the notepad on a tall table nearby. She licked at dry lips, wondering what she could even say. Finally, she wrote:
“Let’s not fool ourselves, okay? Thanks for the great time.”
Once the door clicked shut behind her, she could hear her heartbeat inside her skull.
Are you making the right choice?
It was too late for that question now. She was locked out of the suite with all her earthly possessions in her grip. At this point, there would be no explaining away why she was in the hallway, everything packed. Sleepwalking? No chance. Not with that handwritten note.
She needed to keep moving. Stick to the plan.
Even if it suddenly seemed like the biggest mistake she could make.
Her footsteps scuffed through the tiled foyer as she headed for the front of the villa. Once outside, she finally pulled up the ride share app to ping a ride. The nearest one was five minutes away—perfect.
It didn’t matter if this ride share back to San Francisco would drain her bank account.
Protecting herself was worth it.
17
Daniel awoke the next morning to the sound of chirping birds. Every part of him felt deeply satisfied, like he’d achieved some sort of internal enlightenment and just had back-to-back three-hour massages.
A yawn rolled past his lips and he stretched. As his arms met empty space beside him, his eyes shot open.
Jackie wasn’t there.
He listened for a few moments, rationalizing that she was probably using the bathroom, or taking a shower. But the suite was oddly quiet. The only sound was the chirping birds from outside. He sat up, the sheets crumpling around his waist
.
“Princess?”
No response. He drew his brows together. Maybe she’d gotten hungry and decided to get breakfast to bring back to the room. After all, they’d burned quite a lot of calories the previous night. He headed to the bathroom to wash his face and pee. And while he was mid-stream, his gaze drifting over the white marble countertop, something clicked into place.
Her toothbrush was missing.
In fact, everything that she’d brought and stored in the bathroom was missing.
He washed his hands, looking over everything again. His shampoo, conditioner, aftershave, toothpaste—all of it was there. He headed out into the bedroom, confusion drawing tight inside him. He checked the closet, and that’s where his stomach really cinched into a sick knot.
Her luggage was gone.
Her clothes were gone.
Everything was gone.
“Jackie?” He could hear the worry in his voice. But it still didn’t seem possible. There had to be some very obvious explanation that he was overlooking. “You in here?”
He walked into the lounge of the suite. Everything was exactly as it should be. He frowned, opening up the front door and looking both ways down the hallway. She wasn’t out there. Only when he shut the door—nearly slamming it—did a piece of paper flutter to the ground.
A note.
He snatched it up, his heart lodged in his throat as he read it. And read it again. And read it one more time.
Finally, he crumpled it up in his hand and scoffed, tossing it to the floor.
“Bullshit.” He stormed back into the bedroom, intent on finding his phone. He immediately called Jackie. It rang and rang—and finally clicked over to voicemail.
So he called her again.
He wasn’t surprised when she didn’t pick up that time either, which just made him angrier. He pulled up their message thread and fired off a quick text: