by Tina Beckett
Her frown was as big as her earlier smile had been. “You can’t seriously believe that. How do you think people get through medical school? If there were no teachers, no one would ever become a doctor.”
“No, I don’t believe that philosophically. But in practice? In my case, it’s true. And I just haven’t been willing to face that—to accept it as my new reality.”
“Is it such an awful reality?”
“No. I guess not.” Being the administrator of a teaching hospital had seemed like a good thing when it had been offered to him, but was he really happy doing what he did? He wasn’t sure. Three years wasn’t really long enough to make a determination on that. “Maybe at some point I’ll think about it.”
“If you’d had a resident working with you on Matthew’s case, he could have learned some valuable tips about skull fractures and how to assess and treat them. Instead, you handed him off to a veteran neurosurgeon and no one learned anything.”
“Point taken.” She was as blunt as she was beautiful.
She put a hand on his wrist, the clinging grains of sand pale against her tanned skin. “I didn’t mean that to come out as harsh as it did. You just have so much talent.”
“I could have been a complete hack, for all you know.”
“I heard the hospital in New York didn’t want to let you go. They don’t fight a resignation unless they consider you valuable.”
Yes, they had fought it. They’d offered him a huge incentive to stay, even though they knew he would probably never operate again.
“If I hadn’t left, I never would have learned how to surf, though.”
In her case, those who could also taught. And being at the beach with her had been fun.
“Well, there is that. Are you glad you came?”
He couldn’t remember the last time he’d actually enjoyed an outing with a woman. Certainly those last months with his ex-wife had been pretty excruciating. She’d been right to leave him. He knew there was no going back and fixing things. Nor did he want to. He’d been an ass. And now that he knew he had it in him, he didn’t trust himself not to repeat some of those mistakes.
So he needed to tread carefully with Addy, because something was brewing that he didn’t quite understand. That he didn’t quite want to stop.
“I am. I had a good time.”
“I’m really glad. I think we both needed to get away for a while.”
Her words were low, fingers still on his wrist. He let them stay there, unwilling to pull away as more and more of that uncertainty began swirling inside him.
“I know I did.”
Her eyes centered on his. There was a dot of sand on her chin, and he couldn’t stop himself from reaching over to brush it away with his thumb. Her skin was soft and warm, the ocean water having dried to a fine film.
If he kissed her, would she taste of salt?
Was it “if” he kissed? Or was it—when?
“Garret?”
“Sand.”
“I’m sure it’s on more than just my chin.”
Was that an invitation?
His gaze skated down the line of her throat, the indent of her waist, the curve of her hip. And yes, she had sand clinging to her arms. Her legs. Her feet.
And suddenly he knew. He was going to taste her skin.
He leaned forward and stopped within an inch of his goal. He waited for her to pull away or make a move that said she didn’t want this. She studied him for a few seconds and they hovered. Person to person. Mouth close to mouth.
Before he could finish assessing her reactions, or decide if he would actually go through with it, she did the last thing he expected. Addy closed the gap and kissed him first.
CHAPTER FIVE
GARRET’S MOUTH WAS WARM. No, it wasn’t. “Warm” was too ambivalent a word. It was hot, burning hers. He’d stayed still for a split second when her lips touched his, but surely he’d been headed in this direction when he’d moved so close. She’d just jumped in quicker than he had. Mainly because she’d been afraid he was going to back out. She’d been wanting to kiss him ever since she watched him strip off his shirt before they hit the water. Each moment of their lesson had inflamed that need, as had the brief moments she’d caught him looking at her.
God, she really did have a crush on him.
Did it matter, if he felt the same way?
When she’d demonstrated the pop up on her board, she’d watched color creep up his neck and into his face and wondered if it was pooling in any other areas of his body.
It had been driving her crazy.
It was still driving her crazy.
His hand came up and slid beneath her hair, curving around her nape, his thumb stroking the side of her neck in a way that made her shudder. Heat rushed through her, winding around and around until she was encased, held prisoner by her own need.
Her tongue slid along the seam of his lips, and his thumb ceased its movements. She settled closer, desperate for him to touch her.
They were on a public beach, for God’s sake. He couldn’t just lay her back and yank off her bikini bottoms. Even if she ached for him to do just that.
Without warning, Garret jerked back, the movement so sudden that she almost fell on top of him.
He shut his eyes, his chest rising and falling with a ragged sound that was nothing like the muted sounds of the ocean around them.
She had no idea what made him pull away, but, God, she was glad he had. She’d been on the verge of making a fool out of herself. A very, very big fool.
What had gotten into her? Hadn’t she let herself get involved with Leo after barely knowing him? Had she learned nothing from that experience?
Garret probably thought she was overeager—maybe even desperate. A hot wash of embarrassment poured over her.
She didn’t want his eyes to open, because when they did—
“Ah, hell, Addy. I have no idea where that came from.”
An apology, right? Dear Lord, she hated that he was sorry. Hated that she was shaking like a leaf, unable to capture any of the words rattling around in her head.
Finally, she sat up, dragging her fingers through her tangled mass of hair. She counted to three in an effort to compose her thoughts then sucked down a deep breath, reaching for the first excuse she could find. “It’s the ocean. It gets to you.”
“Is that what it was?”
Was she that desperate to explain her behavior? Evidently, because the look he gave her was a mixture of doubt and relief. She was the one who’d planted her lips on his. She could only hope what she’d said was true, that the ocean was actually to blame.
“It was on my part.” Said as if she truly believed what she was saying.
He planted his elbows on his knees, sending her a frown. “I didn’t come out here hoping something like this would happen. I hope you know that.”
Was he worried she’d file a sexual harassment report with the hospital? That made her cringe, more heat piling on top of the previous batch in her face.
“I’m the one who asked you to come, remember.”
“I do, but—”
She gulped. This was ridiculous. “Listen, I know you didn’t come here with anything in mind. I didn’t either. It just—happened. People kiss all the time. It’s not a big deal.” It was to her, since she didn’t actually “kiss all the time.” But he didn’t need to know that. “There’s no reason we can’t just put this behind us, is there?”
She wasn’t exactly sure she could do that, but she was desperate to get back to the place they’d been before any of this had happened. To kill the growing awkwardness between them.
This was nothing more than a day on the beach where there were skimpy suits, tanned skin and impulses that drove men and women to have sex.
Sex.
That was not going to ha
ppen.
As impulsive as kissing him had been, spending the night with him would be a hundred times worse.
She was not going to jump into a relationship again. Especially not in response to a crisis the way she’d done the last time. Her mom’s condition had driven her into Leo’s arms. She wasn’t going to let her marital breakup drive her into someone else’s arms. Especially not her boss’s.
Not that there was any chance of that happening.
“No, there’s not.”
At first she thought he’d read her mind and was responding to her thoughts. Then she realized he was simply answering her earlier question.
“Good.” She wrapped her arms around her knees and looked out at the ocean. “It was simply the euphoria of perfecting the timing on your pop up.”
“Why the hell do they have to call it a pop up, of all things? Couldn’t they have come up with a better term?” His voice sounded strained.
She smiled, having a pretty good idea why the description was bothering him. And she could have done a better job with her phrasing.
Perfecting the timing on your pop up?
That could definitely be taken to mean something entirely different.
Right now, she was very glad she was a woman. Her insides might be tied up in knots, but at least there wasn’t any outward physical evidence of her thoughts.
Making a conscious effort to edge the conversation back onto neutral territory, she said, “You’ve never heard of popping up on your board?”
“I barely knew what a surfboard was before, much less tried to use one.”
Smiling, despite herself, she said, “Well, now you can put a new skill on your résumé.”
“Popping up. New skill. Right.”
Maybe she could put that on her résumé as well. Having urges pop up where they weren’t welcome. Maybe that was her cue to get out of there before she did anything else stupid. “You never know. And as fun as this has been, it looks like most of the surfers are giving up. The tide has come in too far for the waves to be any good.”
Glancing at how the water was lapping several yards further inshore than it had been, she knew it was the truth. But it was more than that. She needed to escape, to have time to process what she hoped was a simple case of the atmosphere getting the best of her. “I guess it’s time to turn in my rental board.”
“You can stay if you want.” A quick glance at her watch showed it was almost twelve fifteen. They’d been out here for almost three hours. And in spite of her doubts about what had happened, she’d had a good time. “I need to go home and catch up on some fun things, like laundry and cleaning.”
“You won’t go into the hospital today.”
“Not unless I’m called in.”
He nodded. “Good.”
“What about you? Are you taking the rest of the day off?”
“Yes. I do learn from my mistakes.”
He could have been referring to his accident. Why, then, did she feel as if that had been directed at what had happened between them a few minutes ago? Well, that was fine. She would learn from her mistakes as well. Like never watching him undress ever again.
That meant no more beach outings. And she was going to have to be okay with that.
Because to do anything else was inviting disaster on a whole new level. And with Leo standing as a bright reminder of what could happen when she let herself off her leash, she needed to watch her step.
So what did she do now?
First thing was there would be no more outings with Garret. She was making a promise to herself. Unless it was related to work, it was off-limits. Everything was to be business as usual. No more kissing. No more surfing. No more anything.
No matter how hard that promise might be to keep.
* * *
A week after the kiss, Garret stood with Grace and the rest of her children at the front entrance of the hospital. They were being discharged. Actually three of the kids had gone home with Grace’s mom a day after the fire.
Repairs to the house were well under way, so life would soon get back to normal for them. Well, maybe not completely normal. It would take a while for Grace to come to terms with dropping Matthew. Right now, her mom held the baby, even though the burns on Grace’s hands and arms were healing. But it was something she would work through, hopefully.
Kind of like he was working through what had happened between him and Addy on the beach.
Addy had asked him to call when the family was released so she could come see them off as well. He’d paged her, but she hadn’t responded. Actually he hadn’t seen her much, since that day at the beach.
Was she finding it awkward to see him? Since he’d skipped his normal Monday ER visit this week, he would say she wasn’t the only one.
As long as they didn’t let it damage their working relationship beyond repair.
She suddenly appeared out of nowhere, her hands deep in the pockets of her pants. “Sorry, I had a patient. I was afraid I was going to miss you.”
She looked toward him, but not quite at him.
Well, that was fine.
Grace reached up and clasped Addy’s hands. “Thank you so much for everything. I can’t believe how amazingly lucky we were. Mom says the house is almost as good as new. After only a week.”
“That’s wonderful. And Matthew is doing okay?” This time she met his eyes as if seeking confirmation for her words.
He gave her a nod. “Yes, he’s well on his way to a full recovery.”
Kind of like Garret was. As difficult and uncomfortable as the aftermath of that kiss had been, maybe it actually had accomplished something. Maybe it was busy working behind the scenes, sawing through the first link in a chain that bound him to his past. If so, the ocean should carry warning labels for those who didn’t really want to be free.
Or maybe he did.
And he could admit—at least to himself—that kissing her had been a memorable experience. She had definitely tasted like salt.
His mouth went up in a half smile. She must have caught it, because her head tilted in question. He gave a quick shake of his head to indicate it was nothing.
Beverly dropped a kiss onto the baby’s head and shifted his weight higher on her hip. “He’s doing great. He’s back to being as ornery as he ever was.”
Right now, the baby looked anything but ornery as he smiled and babbled, staring at the lobby as if it was the most fascinating place he’d ever been. The bruising around his eyes was fading, a yellow shadow replacing the red and black he’d been sporting.
And his fracture should heal without any problems.
Something twisted inside Garret, obliterating his pleasant thoughts from a few minutes earlier. At least this family would get their happy ending.
Beverly was actually thinking of relocating to South Beach. The fire might be just the motivation she’d needed to move closer to her grandchildren and daughter.
Addy went over and picked Matthew’s chubby hands and clapped them together several times, smiling when the baby laughed. “He’s back to being as cute as ever, if you ask me.”
She looked completely at ease with the baby, the furrow between her brows disappearing, her face shining with what looked like joy.
Oh, how he remembered that feeling. Looking down at Leticia had made his heart swell with love. A complete and utter happiness that he’d thought nothing could take away.
How wrong he’d been.
He swallowed, as the moment between Addy and Matthew continued, and for a brief instant something flashed inside his skull, before he blanked it out, taking a step back.
“Oh, I almost forgot,” Beverly said. “Is the auction open to the public? I picked up a brochure.”
“It’s open to anyone who would like to come.” He somehow managed to keep his voice smooth and calm, hoping
any evidence of the turbulence inside was well hidden. “We should have a complete list of auction items a week before the gala, if you want to come by and pick one up. They’ll be here in the lobby.”
“I’ll do that, thank you.” Then Beverly turned to her daughter. “I’m going out to bring the car around.”
“It’s okay, Mom. I can walk.”
“Are you sure, honey?”
“I’m positive.” Grace’s eyes went to her baby and then skipped away, a quick look of fear crossing her face. “If you could just strap Matthew in his car seat for me. I don’t think I can manage yet with my hands.”
Although her hands were still red, Garret was pretty sure she could click a baby into his seat without too much difficulty. After all, she’d grabbed Addy’s hands and held them without a single wince. He glanced at the other doctor and saw her frown. So, he wasn’t the only one who’d noticed.
Grace stood and turned toward him. “Thank you for everything. With Matthew especially.”
“That’s what we’re here for. You have those cards I gave you?”
He’d given her the numbers of the hospital crisis line and chaplain in case she needed to talk to someone about what she was going through. Something he should have done much sooner than he had after his daughter passed away.
“I do. I won’t need them, though.”
“Hang on to them, okay? Just to make me feel better.” The last thing he wanted to do was ask someone from social services to check in on the family, but if push came to shove, he would. Hopefully, with her mother there, things would click back into a normal rhythm.
Kind of like he was hoping would happen with him and Addy. That their little incident would be forgotten or that they would at least stop avoiding each other.
“I will. Thank you again.” With that, they walked outside and made their way into the parking lot, one of the younger kids turning to give them a wave. Garret waved back.
“What cards was she talking about?”
“I gave her the number for the hospital counselor in case she needed to talk.”
“I’m glad.” She pulled her stethoscope from around her neck, coiled it and stuck it in the pocket of her sweater. “I was a little worried about how she was going to cope once she got home. I’m glad her mom is here.”