by Emma Davies
Lawrence regarded her evenly. ‘Are you done, or are you going to give me your expert opinion on Kit as well?’
Daisy stared back. ‘I may as well,’ she replied. ‘I didn’t answer your question earlier because I didn’t want to be rude, but maybe I will tell you.’ She took a deep breath. ‘You said before that Kit doesn’t bother anyone, but there’s a very big difference between not bothering to speak to people, and choosing not to. I’m only just beginning to understand that and I think Kit chooses very carefully indeed. He’s already worked out he has nothing to prove, and it takes someone who is very comfortable in their own skin to do that. So, rather than expend his energy trying to make a point to someone who is never going to listen, he simply withdraws. You think he’s weak, but perhaps he’s actually the strongest of you three brothers. He chooses his battles instead of trying to fight them all. Interesting then that he still considers himself very much in the running where Buchanans is concerned.’
She dropped her head, momentarily astounded by her own words. She had thought she barely knew the brothers, but perhaps over the years she had picked up more than she had realised. Daisy had never been able to fathom why Bea had made her such a crucial part of the competition, but perhaps she saw something that no one else did – not even Daisy herself.
‘I asked for that, didn’t I?’
She squinted across at him. ‘Well, you did actually… But I’m sorry it came out rather more forcefully than I intended. I’m tired…’ She blew out her cheeks. ‘And boiling hot, it’s so stuffy in here… But I shouldn’t have said—’
‘Probably not, given that I’m expecting to be your employer soon.’ He narrowed his eyes. ‘But at least I know you’re honest.’ His gaze flicked to the menu card on the table. ‘They’ll be serving dinner shortly, perhaps you might like to make your choice.’
It was pretty much the end of the conversation.
Daisy woke with a start some while later, staring around her in panic as she tried to work out where she was. The view beyond the window was obscured by complete darkness.
‘We should be home in about five minutes,’ came a voice from behind a newspaper and Daisy groaned inwardly as the memory of her conversation with Lawrence came rushing back.
She wiped at her mouth and sat up straighter, peering through the fogged-up window.
‘It would appear to have snowed as well,’ Lawrence added. ‘Although how much it’s difficult to say.’
‘Oh.’ She cleared her throat. ‘I don’t suppose it’s that bad, it never usually is.’
Lawrence lowered the paper and looked at her. ‘Are you feeling better?’ he asked.
As soon as he said it she realised that the ball of pain that had been sitting over her right eye was still there, in fact, if anything it had intensified. It was tension, and the result of being cooped up in a hot stuffy train for too long. The fact that she had slept was a miracle, but now she had a stiff neck as well. She just wanted to be home.
‘Yes, a little bit, thank you. It’s just a headache,’ she muttered. Which would no doubt turn into a full-blown migraine and she had work in the morning. She bit back her frustration. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep,’ she said. ‘Although maybe that was a good thing; it gave you some time to yourself without having to listen to me argue.’
To her relief, he smiled. ‘I’ve been thinking about what you said, actually. I’m not sure I agree with it but, despite your opinion of me, I do admire people who can say what they feel. That takes a certain amount of courage.’ He broke off to fold his newspaper in half. ‘And, all in all, it’s been an interesting day.’
Well, that much was certainly true. Although Daisy wouldn’t call speaking her mind courageous, more like stupidity.
‘It has, and I need to thank you, for all of this…’ She gestured around the carriage. ‘And Harrods, the food. Plus, I really enjoyed myself with Monique. I’m not really comfortable with all that extravagance – I find it all rather overwhelming – but, even so, I’m glad I came today.’
Lawrence glanced out of the window as the first lights of the town came into view and got to his feet, proceeding to collect his multitude of bags from the parcel shelf above their heads. He took down Daisy’s coat and handed it to her, straightening to look out the window again. ‘Oh…’
She turned at his expression, looking out into the darkness which was just beginning to be punctuated by light as the first houses appeared. Spotlit under the halo cast by the street lights, it was obviously still snowing, and hard at that. She had no way of knowing how long it had been coming down but everything was white. The streets were covered. And whereas Lawrence lived in a big house on the outskirts of the town and could probably walk home if he needed to, she still had a half-hour drive ahead of her.
Lawrence pulled his phone out of his pocket. ‘I wasn’t aware that snow was forecast,’ he said.
‘Well, it has certainly arrived,’ replied Daisy
‘Yes, quite.’ He stared out the window again. ‘Will you be all right getting home?’
She began to put her coat on. ‘Yes, I’m sure the main roads will be fine, don’t worry.’ She kept her voice light; she really didn’t want to give Lawrence any reason to fuss, it would only make her more anxious.
The train was beginning to slow and she rubbed at her temple, rolling her shoulders to ease out the stiffness in her neck. They passed a house ablaze with Christmas lights of every description, the garden full of lit statues, the windows covered with enormous flashing stars, and soon the lights of the town centre rolled by. But Daisy felt as if she was peculiarly misplaced. She always felt that way whenever she’d been away from home; as if life had passed by without her and she no longer fit into it. She pulled her handbag around her and fished for her keys.
Lawrence’s car hadn’t fared too badly. In his reserved space it had been sheltered somewhat in the lee of the building, whereas hers, exposed in the middle of the empty car park, was covered by a layer of snow several inches thick.
Beside her, Lawrence swore under his breath. ‘I’ll give you a hand,’ he said, but she could hear the exasperation in his voice. No doubt he would have a roaring fire and tumbler of fine whisky waiting for him when he got home, and she couldn’t blame him for wanting to get there quicker.
‘It’s fine…’ She waved an airy hand. ‘I have a brush in the boot of the car, and only one of us can use it at a time – there’s no point us both standing about. You get on home, it won’t take me long to clear it.’
She could see the look of relief on his face, and she was glad she hadn’t accepted his offer. It was just one more irritation on a long list that had made up Lawrence’s day, most of them caused by her, and he wanted to be free of her just as much as she wanted to be free from him. There was too much crowding her head already and the snow at least was clean and calming.
‘Thanks again,’ she said, taking several decisive steps forward. ‘And drive safely!’ She waved a hand in salute and, turning swiftly, hurried across the car park.
Several harsh winters had ensured that Daisy always left appropriate clothing and equipment in her car in case of emergencies and she was incredibly glad of that now. The snow had slowed a little, the flakes smaller, but a keen wind still blew and the covering on her car was like icing sugar; light and powdery. It was, however, growing colder by the minute and soon the harsh grip of frost would set in, gluing the snow hard to her windscreen.
She climbed into the car and started up the engine, leaving it running to warm things up and chase the final bits of ice from the screen while she cleared the rest of the car. It took ten minutes, and her fingers were frozen inside her gloves by the time she finished, but, finally, she was ready to go.
She hadn’t even noticed Lawrence pull out, but he had already disappeared as she began to manoeuvre out of the car park and towards the bright lights of the town. The streets were deserted, the shoppers all gone, but the festive lights still danced and sparkled above
the shops, strings from one side of the street to the other blowing in the wind. It was extraordinarily pretty, the black-and-white timbered frames of the shops rendering the scene like something from a Dickens novel. She drew in several deep breaths, forcing down her shoulders and reminding herself to relax. The day with Lawrence was over, she had the rest of it to herself and her little cottage would be warm and toasty in no time. She might even treat herself to another hot chocolate.
The snow had stopped now but, as she turned off the main road towards her house, the layer of white became more and more dense the further she drove. The earlier winds had whipped along the road, blowing the snow into huge drifts that spilled out from the hedgerows across the narrow lanes. She slowed to a crawl, navigating with difficulty, until she stopped, recognising that if she went any further she was likely to get stuck. Her only option was to turn around and drive back out to the main road again, follow it a little further along and take another route into the town. She sighed with frustration; she was only a couple of miles from home.
She edged forward, turning the wheel so that the car headed towards the hedge. The road was narrow but with a bit of toing and froing she should be able to turn around. When she had gone as far as she dared she put the car into reverse, easing backwards this time, inch by inch, but it was tricky; the lights from the rear of the car weren’t strong enough to illuminate anything against the thick bank of snow and it was much harder to see where she was in relation to anything else.
She realised her mistake the minute she tried to move forward again. The snow was powdery and she had gone too far back. The tyres had nothing to grip on and they spun without traction. Daisy backed off the accelerator and very gently applied it again. Nothing. Just the frustrated whine of her going nowhere.
Okay. Think. She had a shovel in the back of the car, she would be fine. All she needed to do was scrape away some of the snow from under her tyres and she would be on her way again. She grabbed her phone and put on the light, opening the car door and preparing herself for the blast of cold air.
And that’s when she realised her second mistake. She had reversed too far back and the boot of the car was now firmly pressed up against the hedge – there was no way she could even get it open. Damn. She swore under her breath, kicking at the snow in frustration. She looked down at her boots and groaned. The leather was already sopping and soon her feet would be very wet indeed. Wet and very cold. She wrenched open the rear door and climbed inside, furious with herself.
She bent down in the confined space and began to unlace her boots, her cold fingers struggling with laces that she couldn’t see in the dark. She kicked the door open so that the interior lights came on again and thumped the back of the seat in anger. Eventually, after a few minutes more tussling, she managed to get her boots off and pull on her wellies, relieved that these had been on the back seat, along with an old oilskin coat and blanket.
Right, try again. She looked around for something else she could use to scoop away the snow from under her tyres, but there was nothing apart from the scraper she used to clear the windscreen with. It would have to do, and she pulled her gloves on again. The pain above her eye pounded as she climbed from the car and she wriggled her shoulders again, trying to ease them. She was so nearly home.
‘Daisy…?’
She whirled around at the sound of her name, her feet nearly slipping out from under her with the force of her movement.
‘Kit, you scared the life out of me! What on earth are you doing here?’
15
Friday 13th December
Twelve shopping days until Christmas
Kit was standing in the lane holding a torch, keeping the beam played at the ground.
‘Walking,’ he replied. ‘I saw the car headlights and thought I had better come and investigate. Isn’t the snow amazing?’
Daisy stared at him. Not only had she not heard him coming but what a ridiculous thing to say under the circumstances.
‘Not when you’re stuck in it, it’s not,’ she replied. ‘Which is all I need after the day I’ve had.’ She aimed a vicious kick at the car’s tyre. ‘And I’m only a couple of miles away from home.’
Kit looked away to his right across the fields. ‘Less, as the crow flies.’
She followed his line of sight. For goodness’ sake, what did that have to do with anything?
‘I’m going to have to clear the snow away from the tyres so I can get out… but I can’t open the boot to get the shovel.’ She held up her hand. ‘And don’t say anything. I know it was stupid to reverse so far back, but I couldn’t see where I was going.’
Kit didn’t say a word. Instead he flicked the torch off.
The darkness settled around them, instantly soothing. Daisy sighed, feeling the tight ball of tension within her.
‘You know that saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”?’ said Kit.
‘Yes – usually said by people who could never make lemonade if they tried and just use it as a means of pretending to be something they’re not and—’ She ground to a halt as she realised that Kit was looking at her, eyebrows raised, an amused expression on his face.
‘Oh…’ she said. And then despite herself she burst out laughing. ‘Which is what you were just going to say if I’d let you get a word in edgeways.’
He grinned. ‘Exactly! But the general invitation towards optimism is hard to ignore. It struck me that there are two things we can do in this situation… Actually, there are three, but the third option is for me to just go on my way and leave you here, so I’m not going to mention that one.’
She met his look. ‘So, go on then, what are the two options?’
‘Well, we could either struggle for half an hour to free your car so that you can drive off and try the other road into town only to find that it’s also impassable, or I could walk you home. It’s the most beautiful evening.’
Daisy looked around her. ‘Is it?’
‘Yes,’ said Kit more forcefully. ‘It is.’ And he looked up.
It seemed in that moment as if everything stood still. The darkness swirled around Daisy and lifted as the moon came out from behind a cloud. A bright shining disc of light that transformed everything around her into a silvery shimmering landscape. Sounds rushed in and for a moment she swore she could hear the world breathing.
She looked back at Kit, dumbstruck. Suddenly she wanted very badly to be out in the fields, to leave the tensions and stress of the day behind her and breathe in the calming air.
‘But what do we do about the car?’
Kit shrugged. ‘Leave it here,’ he said. ‘The frost is going to set hard tonight and this snow will be going nowhere. It’s my day off tomorrow, don’t forget. If you leave me your keys, I’ll come back early in the morning and free it for you. Provided I can get through, I’ll drive it home. How’s that?’
It all sounded utterly and beautifully simple.
‘Thank you,’ she said, before looking down at her clothes. Her wellies would be fine, and the hem of her skirt was already wet so there was nothing she could do about that.
‘Are you warm enough?’ asked Kit. ‘I have spare gloves and another fleece if you want to put that on under your coat.’
She nodded gratefully and five minutes later they were set to go. The fleece was huge on her, but warm and, as Kit hitched his pack onto his back, he smiled. ‘My emergency rescuing-a-damsel-in-distress gear,’ he said.
Daisy arched her eyebrows. ‘Really?’ she said. ‘Pick up many women out in the wilds, do you?’
‘Ah, you’d be surprised… Although actually it’s more like a change of clothes in case I fall on my arse and get soaked.’
She laughed. Collecting her handbag and checking she had her keys, she made sure the car was locked and then gestured at the moonlit road. ‘And you’re sure you know the way?’ she asked. ‘I don’t really ever come out this way when I walk.’
‘You’ll see,’ said Kit, mysteriously. ‘Com
e on.’
They walked back along the lane for a hundred metres or so before Kit led them through a gap in the hedge, helping her pick her way over the drifts that had blown there.
‘It’s not so deep out in the field,’ he said. ‘There’s no barriers for the snow to collect against, you see, it simply spreads itself out.’
Daisy nodded. ‘And did you really just come out for a walk?’
Kit stopped suddenly, looking around him and then finally up at the sky. ‘Of course… what could be more perfect?’ He touched her arm lightly. ‘Listen,’ he said.
So Daisy did, allowing the sounds of the world around them to reach her. She could hear the snow being blown across the field and a pair of foxes barking in the distance and, closer to home, something rustled under cover of the hedgerow. But surrounding it all was a deep stillness, not a sound in itself, more a sense that permeated every part of her, so resonant she could almost hear it. And it was so familiar to her. She welcomed it in like an old friend, drawing it deep inside of her with each breath, calming and peaceful. London suddenly seemed a million miles away.
‘Better?’ asked Kit gently.
‘Yes… yes, I am.’ She looked at him incredulously, realising that her headache had gone. How did he know? And, as she stood, head angled to the sky, she realised that Kit was very much at home out here in the field, with just the moon as his guide. How had she never seen that before? Today wasn’t a one-off, he was a part of the landscape out here, just as she was at home by the canal. It shocked her that she had never even noticed, or perhaps never taken the time to. And yet he had obviously recognised something in her.