"Like you were the prettiest thing he'd ever seen. Like you were a delicate antique he needed to treat with care." She smiled wider now. "He looked at you like a man who's smitten."
"Huh." I thought about that. I'd felt the mutual attraction, definitely, but I wasn't sure what to do about it. Especially after everything Tuck had said when I was at his house. "I think it's just a little infatuation on both our parts," I said, wishing that weren't true.
"Why can't it be more than that, Annie, dear?"
I put my cup down and dug my nail into the blotter on the top of the desk in front of me. "Tuck told me this weekend how much he likes his single life, that he's kind of a loner. He seems like he likes everything the way it is for him now—uncomplicated, simple."
"Everyone's a loner until they find a reason not to be," Dot said, her old eyes twinkling.
"That's a nice thought, but I don't think that's the case here. He told me that right after I'd explained pretty much everything about my family. About Mom and what happened with Johnny."
Dot leaned back in her chair, her face solemn now. She and Mom had been best friends. "I miss your mother every day," she said. "And I wish Johnny had found other ways to cope with that loss."
"He's sick, Dot."
"He might be. But that's not your cross to bear. Don't let your brother get in the way of your happiness."
"Johnny's my family. He's my responsibility."
"You are your first responsibility."
I stared down at my fingers on the desktop. I wished it were that simple, but nothing ever was. My life was messy and unpredictable, and Tuck had told me he liked things calm and quiet. It wouldn't be fair for me to hope that he would accept the chaotic reality of my life. I shook my head, trying to clear out the disappointment that was settling there. I hadn't lost anything—we didn't have anything to begin with, not really.
"How are plans for the cookie contest? Need help?" I asked.
Dot stood up and crossed her arms. "I told you I'd handle that. You just show up ready to decorate and eat cookies."
"You're handling the games outside too?"
"I'm handling it all," Dot told me.
"Thank you," I said, relieved to have one less thing to worry about. "Tuck's going to come do some filming."
"That's perfect," she said, the knowing smile creeping back onto her face.
"That's all it is."
"I know, dear." We walked together back outside, and I hugged my old friend goodbye as I went back to my office.
I called my brother to check in, and he sounded surprisingly upbeat. He'd been out for a walk, he said, and he and Hattie were reading on the deck for the afternoon. He had plans to repair some of the missing boards beneath the house in a few minutes.
"Thanks," I said.
"It's my house too, right?" I could hear him smiling, and my heart lifted a bit.
"It is," I told him.
"See you in a bit."
I’d called Dad as soon as I’d had a moment after Johnny arrived, and I anticipated him showing up any time. I just wasn’t sure how my brother would handle it.
I finished up the afternoon, feeling like maybe this time things would be okay—at least with Johnny.
* * *
That evening, things did seem okay. Johnny and I had dinner together at the diner, and we ran into Chance and Sam.
"How are you, Johnny?" Chance asked, and I tried not to cringe, remembering how badly things had gone the summer Johnny had worked for Palmer Construction.
"Doing okay," Johnny answered, ducking his head a little. "One day at a time, you know."
"That's good, man," Sam said, clapping my brother on the back. Sam and Johnny had been the same grade in school. They'd been friends once. Before Mom had died.
The Palmers left and we had a quiet dinner, watching the Kings Grove sidewalks out front as people came and went, making their holiday preparations. Big wreaths with red bows hung from the streetlights, and every storefront had lights strung across it. As the sun faded, the village began to glow, and I felt something in me lift. My life wasn't perfect, but I loved the holidays, and having Johnny here seemed like a blessing. He seemed well, stable—it was all I ever wanted for him.
I was watching out the window as Tuck's truck pulled in, and Cam, Harper, and Tuck all jumped out and headed for the diner. There weren't a lot of options for eating out in Kings Grove, so the diner was a gathering spot of sorts. There were finer dining options at the inn, but for quick, everyday meals and gathering local gossip, the diner was the place.
My stomach tightened as I watched Tuck's big, lean frame as he closed the door to his truck and run a hand through his long blond hair. He wore a light down jacket, and it made him look like he'd walked right off the pages of an L.L.Bean catalog. He was so handsome it almost hurt.
When the threesome came in the door of the diner, I felt my heart rate accelerate. And when Tuck looked over at me and lifted a hand, I knocked over my water glass. My nerves had evidently not gotten the memo that nothing was going to happen here. Tuck didn't want a complicated life, and I was nothing if not complicated.
"Hey there," Tuck said, crossing to where we sat in three long strides.
Johnny was busily sponging off his lap with napkins.
"I'm so sorry," I said, pushing more napkins his way.
"It's just water," he said, shaking off the accident more easily than I'd ever seen him manage.
"You must be John," Tuck said, facing my brother and extending a hand.
Johnny looked up, and I held my breath for a moment, knowing he had a habit of being territorial. He hadn't mentioned Tuck coming by the house, and I knew it was because he hoped the whole thing might just go away. Johnny had never been fond of my boyfriends, and since he'd been struggling, he seemed calmest when it was just the two of us in our own little bubble.
"Hi," he said, neither warmly or aggressively.
"Hey, Tuck," I said. "This is my brother. Johnny, Tuck is helping me with the winter festival."
"And your sister is helping me train my crazy dogs." Tuck laughed. The sound washed through me, making me feel warm and giddy. A giggle escaped my lips and Johnny shot me a look.
"Hey, Annie!" Harper bounced up to the table, radiating happiness as she always did. She held hands with Cameron Turner, and he greeted us as well.
I introduced them both to my brother, who actually remembered Harper from when we were young. The three of us had played together sometimes, though Harper had been my friend more than Johnny's.
"It's great to see you again," Harper told Johnny, and I waited for him to respond, but he had dropped his eyes to the table and seemed intent on his food. He had a tendency to withdraw when he felt overwhelmed.
"So good to see you all," I said, hoping I could hurry them away. I didn’t want my evening with my brother to end in a scene.
"Come by for a beer soon," Cam said to us both. I watched Tuck's expression change to one of worry that matched what I was feeling.
"Sure," I said, relief washing through me when they began to move off to a booth at the other side of the restaurant. Tuck lingered a moment and then dropped a hand to my shoulder.
"Doing okay, doc?" He asked quietly, and I had a fleeting desire to leap into his arms and let him take care of me, look out for me, even for just a minute.
I smiled up at him, putting on a brave face. "Yep, all's well," I said, my voice shaking a bit.
He glanced at my brother and then back at me, his blue eyes darkening. "Well," he took his hand back, and I felt suddenly chilly. "You know where to find me if you need anything. See you Wednesday, okay?"
I nodded, and felt it like an accusing slap when my brother's eyes landed on my face. As soon as Tuck was gone, he asked in a harsh whisper, "Are you sleeping with that jerk?" His eyes had turned hard and mean.
"We should probably go," I said, wishing the bill would magically appear.
"Answer me."
I shook my head. "He's a f
riend. He's helping, like I told you."
"He wants to do a lot more than that."
Did he? Could my brother really see that in a five-minute interaction? For a moment I let myself get excited about the possibility of Tuck's romantic interest, but then I remembered who I was talking to. Johnny would jump to that conclusion with anyone who touched me. "It's nothing," I said, though part of me wanted to challenge him. Why would it be such a crime for me to find someone to love? This wasn't the place, however, so I sealed my lips and paid the bill when it arrived, glad Johnny stayed quiet until we were in the car.
When we got home, I'd heard more than enough about how my brother was just looking out for me, how he just wanted to keep me safe.
"I'm an adult," I told him calmly. "And while I want you to be happy, and I don’t want to upset you, I have a life to live too. And one day, I want a real relationship. Maybe a family."
Johnny stared at me, and I wondered—not for the first time—why this seemed to be a personal affront to him. Did he believe he'd never have those things, so I shouldn't either?
"You have a family," he said.
I sighed. "I'm going to take Hattie out. Then I'm going to bed."
He was pacing the living room when I went outside with Hattie. When her soft nose pushed beneath my hand, I knelt and put my arms around her, sniffing back the tears that threatened to fall as I thought about Tuck, the way his warm eyes had seemed to understand there was more happening at our table than I could tell him. "Do you think I'll ever get what I want, girl?" I whispered. My dog whined in response. At least she understood.
9
Tuck
I didn't see Annie the next day, but I thought about her almost every moment. I thought about the way she'd looked at me at the diner—like a woman caught in some kind of trap. And I spent a little time thinking about her brother's malevolent gaze, too. It was clear he didn't like me, but I couldn't put my finger on why.
That said, I wasn't about to let Annie's brother determine what would happen between us. And I was more sure than ever that I wanted there to be something between us. I wanted there to be an "us," no matter how great the risk of things not working out.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?
But Johnny seemed determined to keep me away from his sister, judging by his behavior at the cookie-decorating event.
I showed up at five, as requested, to find Annie and Johnny both there already, along with an older man who had the same glowing, almond eyes as Annie and her brother.
"Tuck," Annie said, smiling at me in a way that made my insides feel melty and warm. "This is my dad, Amos."
"Pleased to meet you, sir," I said, shaking his hand.
"You're an Aussie!" The older man seemed delighted by this realization, and he grinned at me.
"A foreigner," Johnny said, spitting the word out between us.
"True enough," I said, trying not to take offense. "But I've been in the States almost a decade now."
Johnny took his sister's elbow and steered her into the clubhouse, leaving me outside with Amos.
"I had a good friend from Brisbane when I was younger," he told me. "We met overseas when I was doing some traveling after my time in the military."
I liked this man immediately—his open warmth was so much like Annie's. "Where did you serve, sir?"
"I was a Marine,” he said. "Did one tour during the eighties. Served in Panama, but ended up traveling for a while after that. Met my Aussie friend in Brazil on holiday."
"Sounds like an adventure," I told him.
He pointed at my camera. "You make movies?"
"Used to," I said. "But I'd like to stay here for a bit, and there aren't a lot of big budget films going on up here, you know? I’m just helping Annie out for now."
He nodded, and a little smile flickered over his lips. "That's good, I think." He lifted his head and looked around. "Guess we're supposed to get these games set up out here."
I helped him set up a couple ring toss pits and put together the bungees for the three-legged race. The air had turned cold during the afternoon, and by the time families began arriving at six, there were far more people inside decorating cookies than there were outside playing games.
I filmed everything, from a tiny toddler smearing himself with frosting to Dot and Annie laughing over cups of cider as they took a quick break. I managed to get Johnny smiling with his dad, and got plenty of great shots of the few folks who ventured out into the cold to play some games.
Christmas music filled the big, open main room of the clubhouse, which was a multi-purpose space with a kitchen and a huge fire pit outside. The fire was roaring, and families gathered around it roasting marshmallows as lights twinkled merrily from the trees and nearby cabins.
It was a perfect night, and I was happy the first big event of the winter festival seemed to be such a success. I watched Annie from a distance, wishing I was by her side, but not wanting to get in the way. She found me later as things wound down a bit, standing near the fire outside.
"There you are," she said, her cheeks pink from the cold.
"Were you looking for me?" I asked, the thought making me unaccountably happy.
She grinned and shrugged. "Maybe."
I smiled and turned to look at the few families still lingering near the warm fire. "I think this was a success," I said. "Everyone's having a great time."
She looked around and nodded. "I think so," she agreed. "Did you get some good footage?"
"Definitely," I said. "I was filming all night."
"Thank you," she said, and she turned to look up into my face, the fire casting her hair into a crown and sending bronze shimmers across her cheeks. She looked like an angel, and I'd never fought so hard to resist the urge to kiss someone.
I lifted a hand, unable to keep myself from touching her, and traced a line with my thumb across her perfect, satin skin, cupping her chin lightly. "You're welcome." Every cell in my body tingled as she rose up on her toes, bringing her mouth even closer to mine, everything in her eyes singing with encouragement.
"There you are." An angry voice shattered the moment.
Annie sprang backward, the almost-kiss fluttering up into the darkening sky like a snowflake shifting away on the winter wind.
"Johnny," Annie said. "What's wrong?"
"I've been looking everywhere for you. Dot needs help cleaning up, and you're just standing around out here with this guy." Johnny jerked a thumb at me and threw a hot look my way. What had I done to Annie's brother? The guy clearly hated me. "Come inside."
"Johnny," Annie said, her voice light and patient. "I'm just spending a minute with my friend, thanking him for helping tonight. I'll be in after that."
"I can see how you were thanking him," Johnny said, his voice venomous. "And it's sick," he spat. "Come inside now." He wrapped a hand around Annie's arm, and I heard alarm bells ringing in my head. I stepped closer, but Annie could clearly handle herself.
"Let go of me, Johnny."
He did, but he didn't look happy.
"I'll be inside in a moment," she said again. "And I don't appreciate your insinuation. I'm an adult, and what I do is my business."
"You're my sister." It was a claim, a stake in the ground. It felt like some kind of challenge.
"Yes. And that will never change," she said, her voice still calm and soothing.
"You're a slut," he said, as if he was trying the word out.
Annie reeled back slightly, as if he'd hit her.
I didn't know where my place was in this family fight, but I couldn't stand still and let Annie be maligned that way. "That's not how you talk to family," I said, my voice lower than I'd expected. Anger bubbled in me. "It’s not how you talk to anyone. And Annie is anything but that."
"I guess you'd know," he said, turning on me. "You disgust me, preying on innocent girls like my sister."
I wasn't sure what to make of Johnny's misplaced words or his anger, but based on what little Annie
had shared, I decided that stepping away might be the right move. "Annie," I said, turning to face her, wishing I could just pull her into my arms and take her away. "Are you okay here? I feel like I'm making things worse."
She sighed, the exhaustion I'd seen earlier returning to her face. "It's okay, Tuck. Johnny and I will just go meet Dad inside. Thanks." She turned to her brother. "Come on, Johnny." She took his arm, and they went inside together. I followed at a distance, wanting to make sure they found Amos, who I was certain would intervene if Johnny was going to turn violent.
I watched Annie and her father talk Johnny down off whatever ledge he seemed to have gotten onto, and I helped Dot put away the leftover cookies and frosting after they'd left. I might have eaten a few as we packed them into the Tupperware boxes she'd brought.
"You eat as many as you like," Dot said, smiling at me warmly. "A big, strong man like you, I'm sure they just disappear into all those muscles."
My neck heated as my embarrassment climbed my skin. It didn't stop me from eating cookies, though. "These are amazing, Mrs. West."
"Call me Dot, silly. And thank you. That's an old recipe that's been up here in Kings Grove for generations."
"In your family?" I asked.
"More like the Kings Grove family," she said.
"Yeah?" I thought about that, and realized it was part of what charmed me about this place, the way everyone looked out for one another. It really did feel like a big extended family.
"Yes, but I still won't give Chance Palmer the secret ingredient." She shot me a conspiratorial look.
"Really? Why not?" I knew Chance had a penchant for baking. "He's not part of the family?"
She stood up straight. "He keeps talking about publishing a cookbook. I don't know if I want all the Kings Grove secret recipes out there in the world like that."
I nodded. "Might be nice, actually."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I don't have a lot of family. And some folks have family they don't enjoy too much. Maybe it'd be nice to share something from this family that others could enjoy too. In a way it'd be like sharing what we have up here with the world."
Christmas in Kings Grove: Kings Grove, Book 5 Page 5