Broken Tenets

by Beth Reason

  Chapter 13

  That evening, Tenet, Scarab, Hark and Enna sat around the dinner table. Though no one pointed it out, everyone noticed that Tenet's plate contained both vegetables and meat, and they also noticed he didn't flinch once when trying the beef. The conversation was intentionally light, as everyone also desperately tried to ignore the tension.

  “He done good work, boy,” said Hark, nodding to the back of Tenet's hand.

  Tenet put his fork down and held his hand up for all to see. “All gone.”

  “You miss it?”

  Tenet shook his head and started eating again. “Not a bit. I hated it my whole life. I'm glad it's gone.”

  Enna looked closely. “I can barely tell anything was ever there. Did it hurt?”

  Tenet nodded, not embarrassed at all to admit it. “Like a bastard. But it didn't last long.”

  The conversation died down again, and everyone went back to eating in silence. Hark looked to Enna, who shrugged. He made a motion towards Scarab, and Enna took the hint.

  “You got your DNA reassignment today, right?”

  Scarab nodded. “Well, sort of. It's not really a reassignment.”

  Tenet didn't really feel like talking to her about anything. But he was curious about what the procedure entailed. They ran out of time that day for his own, and he had been wondering how it was that DNA could be altered. And, most of all, he was wondering how much more pain he'd have to suffer. “What is it, then?”

  Scarab looked like she was going to ignore him for a second, then said quickly, “It's a new tagger. Goes in under the shoulder, like the gover tags, but it gives a different DNA code when you're scanned.”

  Tenet felt a flood of relief. “Phew. I thought that maniac would cut us open and replace all our blood and guts or something.” He gave a little laugh, but he wouldn't put it completely past Weevil.

  Scarab scoffed as if Tenet were being serious. “Now how would he manage that?”

  “I don't know,” said Tenet getting annoyed. “That's why I asked!”

  Everyone went back to the uncomfortable silence, discovering that no matter how great the tension, silence was better than arguing. After the meal, they all helped to clean up and Hark and Enna announced they were going to bed. Before they could get down the hallway, Weevil burst in.

  “Gather round, kiddies, gents, and ladies! You're never gonna believe what I found!” He put a com deck on the table and sat, waiting for everyone to do the same. He couldn't contain his excitement, and wiggled in his seat while he waited for every one to gather around.

  “You ready?” He hit a button on the com deck, and Tenet's voice came through. It was him, early on in his journey, alone and wandering in the first few days of the trip, babbling almost incoherently to himself.

  Tenet frowned as he listened to the words. “What the hell?”

  Weevil hit the key again, and it skipped forward to the conversation between him and Scarab in the kitchen of the outpost. “No way,” said Scarab in disbelief.

  Tenet looked to Weevil. “The chunk.”

  Weevil nodded, grinning over his accomplishment. “That thing...amazing. Absolutely amazing piece of technology. You won't believe all the info it contains! Not only is it a bug, but it's got your entire life on it.”

  “Hold on, now. I'm old and tired and not followin',” said Hark.

  “You didn't tell em?” Weevil looked happy at the news. “Great! Good boy! My scientific achievements should be my tales to tell. Well done!” He thumped Tenet on the back and turned to the others. “The kid had a double tag. First one in the shoulder was standard issue, boring as hell. Second one turned up in his thigh. Huge ass thing I've never seen before. Looked like a silver cigar stuck right in there. We dug it out and through my amazing skills as a scientist were able to open it up. Lo and behold, what was inside? The most astounding little computer I've ever seen in my life.”

  Enna turned to Tenet. “Are you alright? That must have been painful.”

  “No. Someone ordered him to use painkillers on me,” he said watching Scarab stiffen. “I'm glad the order was given. He stitched me up good as...well, good as he could.”

  “Hey!” said Weevil, highly offended. “I did topnotch work!”

  “Yeah...if you were a blind monkey.”

  Weevil grinned, completely unoffended. “Oh, love of my life. A scar like that adds a bit of character.” He turned back to the com dock and skipped ahead. “Here's a juicy tidbit.” It was Tenet again, when he was carrying Scarab through the desert and talking to himself. Her. Whatever. Though the recording was one-sided on the playback, he could still hear the imaginary answers his mind made up to try and keep him calm that night.

  Weevil made faces at the words, looking sad when Tenet said something touching, rolling his eyes when the insanity got out of control. He slammed the button. “Blah blah, enough of that. But wait...there's more!”

  Tenet cleared his throat, embarrassed that the others heard his thoughts in that moment of his life. “Amazing sound. Uh...you know...for being recorded in my leg,” he mumbled.

  “Quite,” said Weevil, punching buttons. “But this is what will really knock your socks off.” He hit a button and a computerized voice spewed out a list of coordinates.

  “What's that?” asked Scarab. “Sounds like a list of coordinates.”

  “Minute by minute tracking. No,” corrected Weevil. “Second by second tracking. If I had a map, I could plot out the kid's whole life.” He slammed a button again and placed another chip into the com dock, getting even more excited. “And now, for my final trick...” He let his finger hover over the button, building the anticipation in the room. He lowered his finger slowly, pressed the button, then sat back with his hands behind his head, a grin of triumph on his face.

  What came through the com was a series of rushed words. At first, it was hard to make out what they meant. “Visual display contains young woman testosterone levels increased heart rate elevated god, she's beautiful look at that ass blood flow altered...”

  “What...” Tenet shook his head and listened closely.

  “I wish I had her I'd treat her better than that asshole god I hate that prick testosterone increased sweat glands activated...”

  Weevil looked at the confused faces and sighed. “Not a damn scientifically minded one in the bunch.” He leaned forward and slammed the com button, silencing the voice. “Anyone?” Everyone shook their heads. Weevil threw his hands in the air. “For the record, you all get an F for the day. This my simpleton class, is tech we only dream about. He popped the little chip out. “This chip contains recorded thought.” He placed it in the center of the table for dramatic effect and sat back, letting the implications sink in.

  Tenet felt sick. “That contains all of my thoughts?”

  Weevil gave him a wicked wink. “Yes, you filthy minded little pig. All your thoughts, and better yet, all the processes of your brain. All of it. On that one damning little chip. Well, that and several others. I chose that one because it has the most interesting sections of thought, as tame as those are. God, kid. Even in your head you're really boring.”

  Tenet didn't pay attention to the barb. “Holy...” his voice trailed off.

  “Shit," Weevil finished for him. "Yeah. I know.”

  “How is that possible?” asked Scarab, staring at the tiny chip.

  Weevil shrugged. “I have absolutely no idea. This here is ancient tech.”

  “What does that mean?”

  He slammed his chair forward and leaned in. “Back in the day, they were close. Before the asteroid, they were very, very close to thing. Big things. Things the science fiction writers of old would have killed to see come about. We're talking true artificial intelligence, interstellar travel, the whole shebang. Of course we all know a lot of tech survived.” Weevil frowned. “For the purposes of this lesson, I feel, as your teacher, that I need to be more accurate. The tech survived. The people who knew what it meant...eh. Not so much. W
e had this enormous bank of information that was lost. Machines, fabulously wonderfully advanced machines and gadgets and toys...all useless because we didn't have time to relearn them.”

  “But someone did,” said Tenet quietly.

  “Eureka! He can be taught!” He thumped Tenet on the back. “Good lad. Yes, someone did. My guess would be that lots of someones did. Does anyone else have an image of giant brains tucked away in some governmental prison chained together until they solve the mysteries of the universe? Anyone?” He looked around at their blank expressions. “No. Well, guess it's just me then.”

  Enna shook her head. “This is getting to be a little too much.”

  “Too far out there for you, sugar muffin? I know. Gives me the willies something awful.” He turned to Tenet. “It gets worse, kid. I truly am sorry to say this, but it had a receiver.”

  Tenet didn't follow, but Scarab did. “Oh, hell,” she said quietly.

  “I knew there was a reason you hold my heart, my desert cactus!” He turned back to Tenet. “What the woman who is better than you in every respect means by her eloquent utterance is that if it has a receiver, it stands to reason that it has a transmitter.”

  Tenet felt a chunk of lead hit his stomach. “Oh, god.”

  “Yep, pretty much.”

  Hark swore and shook his head. “Those rotten sons of...”

  “Or daughters,” said Weevil. “I won't stand for sexism in my classroom.”

  Enna rolled her eyes at Weevil, then patted Tenet's arm. “I'm sorry, dear,” she said quietly.

  Scarab looked at Tenet and saw how pale he was. She had to say something. “Tenet, it's alright. It's out now.”

  “My whole life," he muttered. “And I mean, my whole life. Every thought, every feeling, every word.” He shook his head. “Hope they got a good laugh," he said with false levity.

  "Tenet, it's okay to be pissed," said Enna gently.

  He shook his head. "I'm not. I..." He didn't know exactly what he was feeling, but it wasn't anger. It was more of a sense of resignation.“It wasn't the bots at all, was it? I really am just a patsy.” He looked up at Scarab.

  “No,” she said automatically. Tenet was pale and his shoulders were slumped. She wondered if this was finally the straw that would break the camel's back. She couldn't let that happen, not now. Especially not now. She had to get him to fight back, as he had done the whole trip. She refused to let his father, his government win. “No, you're not. You had this in you long before any of this began.”

  Weevil shook his head. “Sorry, Scarab. But the boy's right.”

  “Weevil!”

  “I mean it. He's a patsy, just not the kind we thought." He tapped the little chip. "Someone knew this would be valuable information. My guess is that's why they've been turning up the heat, in case this puppy got out. Someone planned something for the kid a long time ago. While I don't know what they did, he was a pawn. Sorry," he said to Tenet as an afterthought.

  Tenet gave a wave of his hand. "It's okay."

  "And now," Weevil continued. "Whoever put it in wants it back. They probably realize how damning it is to them, and my guess would be they'd do just about anything to get it. Personally, I hope it's the government.”

  “Now why in the hell would you want that?” demanded Hark. “You sayin' now you want the govers involved in your life? You want Big Brother watchin' every move?”

  Weevil held his hands up. “Oh, no, big papa. I never said that. But think about the alternative.”

  The group was silent. The alternative was even more sobering. Any organization outside the government that had the money, resources, and technology to put that type of tracker in Tenet was bad news through and through.

  Weevil cleared his throat after a minute. “I can see my students need a silver lining. The best I can offer is that it doesn't seem like it transmitted in real time."

  "What do you mean?" asked Tenet.

  "I don't think it was sending real time info on you. Your shoulder was a standard issue transmitter. They'll know you were here. They'll know where you went. But this," he motioned, "Was undetectable. It wasn't sending out a signal. There's got to be a transmitter in there. Why record all the data if you can't access it? But I think it takes an outside code for upload."

  "Yearly doctor visits," Tenet said in a numb voice. The group looked at him. "Every year I'd have a long exam. I always thought it was just because of my family status."

  "Any machinery?"

  "Yes." A giant tube to lay in for his yearly scan. An x-ray machine that took full body shots. A wand that he was told counted platelets and that he never before questioned. There was a heart monitor, a thought wave generator, an oxygen sensor...any of them could have been something different and he never bothered to wonder.

  Weevil broke the silence at last. "Right. I think we can safely assume that any info recorded between your last appointment and today wasn't public knowledge. I crushed anything I didn't recognize. Transmitter had to be in that, because I know what everything else was. Gonna toss it into the burner later just to make sure.” He scooped up everything and stood. “They don't know your thoughts or who you're with, but they know you're here. I'm off to bed, ladies, gents, and Tenet. Everyone get some sleep. You're gonna need it. I'm officially kicking you off my land and out of my life in the morning.” He turned to the ladies. “Girls, don't take it personally. I've got a lotta people who depend on my ass staying out of federal work farms.”

  Enna sighed and gave him a small smile. “We understand. Thank you for your generosity.”

  “Any of you fine women want to join me in my room later to thank me properly, the door's open. And if you hear screaming, burst in and pretend to be the cops. There's a pair of handcuffs on the doorknob and I expect a full cavity search, so wear gloves.” He tipped his head to them and walked out of the room.

  Tenet shook his head. “Is he always so...”

  “Yes,” said the other three automatically.

  No one knew what to say or do next. It was an unimaginable situation, and they tried to judge how Tenet was taking the news that his entire life, every movement, every word, and even every thought was monitored by nameless, faceless, evil little men. They tried to judge his reaction, but couldn't. His face was completely blank, as if he were simply overwhelmed.

  Tenet felt them staring at him and knew he should say something. He cleared his throat. “Well, now. That was an interesting evening.”

  “Son,” began Hark, but Tenet waved him off.

  “I'm fine. But I think after that, we need to step up the time line of our plan.”

  Hark looked to Enna. He didn't think the boy was taking it all as fine as he pretended, but he wasn't the best at personal conversations about feelings and junk like that. Enna shook her head, giving him the sign that it was not the time to press the kid. "We sure do," he said, taking Enna's silent advice.

  “We need rest first," Enna said out loud. "We can't run off half-cocked just because of a right good case of the willies.”

  Tenet didn't want rest. He didn't want to stay still. He wanted to get up and run as far away from his father, his government, and his old life as possible. He thought about the Borderlands and for the first time truly wished he was there. He looked up at Scarab and she gave him a small nod. “Alright," he agreed. "But let's meet at first light."

  The older couple stood to go to bed, Hark's back popping with the effort. “I told you to let me rub you down earlier, dear,” Enna said, shaking her head at her stubborn old man.

  “Ain't my back that needs rubbin',” he said with a cackle.

  Enna scoffed and swatted his arm. “Weevil's a bad influence on you, you horny old goat," she said as she dragged him off down the hallway.

  Scarab waited until she heard the click of the door before she spoke. "You okay?"

  Of course he wasn't, but he also wasn't ready to talk. “I've got to get out of here. I've got to get away from them before it's too late."
>
  Scarab decided it was best to follow his lead. He'd talk when he was ready. "That's what I was thinking. If we get out tonight, then they can run the other way first thing. I've got a transport.”

  Tenet nodded. “Weevil said earlier. How did you manage that one?”

  “Sold off my hunter gear.” Tenet's eyes went wide, but Scarab waved him off. “What? Like I'm going to ever need it again.”

  “I can go alone,” he said quietly.

  “And leave me here to what end? To be hunted for the rest of my life? Spend every season being one of the offers I've spent seven years of my life chasing? Thanks, I'll pass.”

  Tenet cleared his throat. “Then you still want to go through with Weevil's plan?”

  She didn't "want" to go through with the plan, she needed to. They needed to. "Want" didn't factor into anything. "We stick with the plan. All of it."

  It didn't matter that he was pretty sure the only reason she said it was a good plan was that she couldn't think of a different one. That she was agreeing, even grudgingly, gave him an odd sense of security. “Alright. Let me get my sack and we'll head out.” He pulled a com chip out of his pocket and placed it on the table.

  “What's that?”

  “My thanks to Hark and Enna.” Tenet stood and started down the hall. “Meet you outside.”

  He grabbed his sack and headed out the door, being careful to be as silent as possible. He waited in the dark, getting impatient as seconds stretched into long minutes. He was about to go back in and see what the hold up was, when Scarab opened the door and stepped out. “What took you so long?” he whispered.

  “I was saying a proper good bye to Weevil,” she said, grinning to herself at the look she knew would be on his face as she walked off into the night. “You coming?”

  The vehicle Weevil had supplied them with was a small transport used for short distance travel between the settlements of hunters. Designed for utility over comfort, it was half the size of Hark's. Weevil assured her that though it wasn't much, it was the perfect vehicle for such a trip. It was built for the rough roads, and looking rough itself, it would call little attention to them.

  On Weevil's advice, Scarab had also bought the plain uniforms of the servicemen the hunters used for repair work. Plain and brown, with caps and brown shoes to match, they would easily blend in at the next settlement.

  “I don't see why we can't just push ahead,” said Tenet, fiddling with the annoying hat.

  “Stop fidgeting,” Scarab said from behind the wheel. “You stand out too much. And we have to blend.”

  “What do we need at the next settlement? Why can't we just push on to the border?”

  Scarab shook her head. “I told you, we need to get ready for it first and I don't have all the necessary supplies. Weevil's good, but being on the outskirts, there's a lot he doesn't have that we need.”

  “Like what?”

  Scarab liked the idle chitchat. It gave her a focus. “Well, money, for one.”

  “I doubt I have any.”

  "You don't even know?" Scarab turned the wheel to miss a small coonskunk. “That was close.”

  “I don't have a credits card.” he corrected himself. “It's as good as gone.”

  “But it's still there in some bank."

  Tenet sighed. “Fine. It's there. But if I can't get it, it's as good as gone. Besides, Weevil said it would be useless in the Borderlands.”

  She sighed. "Look, I get that tonight was difficult." Tenet snorted at the understatement. "But if you plan on arguing with everything I say..."

  "I'm not. I'm simply pointing out the facts."

  "We'll find a way into your account..."

  "If they haven't frozen it already..."

  She gritted her teeth and continued. "And then we'll convert it. Trust me. It'll be better than gold.”

  Tenet sighed and waved a hand. "Fine." He would just have to trust her on that one. “What else do we need?”

  “We need a marriage bond.”

  He tried not to get excited, but couldn't stop the hitch in his chest. “I thought we were going to do that when we crossed."

  She shook her head. “No. It'll make us more acceptable in the Borderlands if we're already a registered couple. They like couples there. Couples mean children and...” she trailed off, embarrassed at where her mind instantly jumped. “Well, they just like couples.”

  Tenet wasn't immune to the images, either, and shifted in his seat.“Won't a wedding make us stand out?”

  She was about to laugh, but then realized he was serious. “It wouldn't be a wedding like you're used to. It'll be a straight civil ceremony. Weevil has a friend who can secure the marriage that even says our wedding took place months ago.”

  Tenet laughed. “Retroactive marriage, huh?”

  “Something like that.” She couldn't help smiling at the thought herself.

  He sighed heavily, thinking about where he was a few months before. “Sipping tea,” he said, seemingly out of the blue.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Sorry. Just thinking about where I was a few months ago on our imaginary wedding date.”

  “Ah. And you were sipping tea?”

  “Probably. Sipping tea out on the patio, watching the workers in the fields harvesting one of the rotations of corn.” He smiled at the serene image. “It would have been almost the end of the season, many people in the field. My sister would have been sitting next to me complaining about this or that. I love her, but no one knows how to complain like she does.”

  Scarab liked the change in him the conversation brought about. He looked calmer, and that took away some of her worry. “That so?” she asked to keep it going.

  “Yep. She turns it into an art form.” He grinned at Scarab, letting her know he held no malice about it. “Mother would have been off somewhere,” he continued. “Probably dallying with the neighbor's husband when his wife was out to market or something like that.”

  Scarab frowned. “That's not a nice thing to say about your mother.”

  He shrugged. “Why? It's true.”

  “Still.”

  He went on with his fantasy. “My father would have been at whatever political function he couldn't drag me to.” He sat up suddenly and looked at Scarab. “Do you... do you think he put that thing in my leg? Do you think he was the one?”

  Scarab didn't know what to say. She didn't want to hurt him further, but she was never one for false niceties. “Yeah, I do. He would have to have at least known about it.”

  Tenet nodded slowly. “I figured. I just hoping maybe I was wrong.” Scarab didn't know what to say to that. "Do you think he listened to the recordings?"

  Scarab shrugged. “I don't know. I just don't.”

  Tenet gave a bitter laugh. “I bet he did. The more I think about it, the more sure I am. He always seemed one step ahead of my whole life. Besides, he's just enough of a bastard to do that.”

  “I thought you admired your father?”

  He shrugged. “And I spent a whole lifetime being trained for you and everyone else to think just that. He leaned back and put his hands behind his head. “I remember one time when I was little. Probably around six or so, because I had just started at the Academy. I came home from school crying because some older kid had kicked my ass.”

  “I never pegged you for a fight picker," she said, shooting him a wry smile.

  He gave a small laugh. "Nah, it wasn't like that. The kid saw that damned mark on the back of my hand and told me what his father said about my father, and one thing lead to another. Trust me, if you've ever seen little boys, one thing leads to another a lot.” He sighed. “I came home in tears, more because of the nasty things the boy said about my father and family than the cuts and bruises.”

  “Scraped up pretty bad, were you?”

  He cocked an eyebrow. “I got my own licks in, thank you very much. But...yeah. My ass was kicked. Anyway, my father took one look at me and put me on work detail for an entire month to
teach me not to humiliate the family by crying in front of the help.”

  Scarab let out a low whistle. “Nice guy.”

  “You know,” he said wistfully. “If I ever have children...” His voice trailed off and he looked out the window. That would rely on a lot of "ifs". If they could make it to the Borderlands, if they were actually allowed in, if they could make it in the harsh life, if Scarab could ever really see him as more than just a bounty... The "ifs" were just too overwhelming to think of. He stared out the window at the dark shadows of the night scape and let his mind wander for awhile.

  Scarab bumped and jostled through the night, allowing Tenet his private thoughts. She couldn't imagine what he was going through, how betrayed and shattered he must feel. At least she was too young to really understand a lot of what was happening when her whole world was turned upside down. At least she didn't discover that everything she was ever told was a lie. At least she wasn't a full grown adult who believed all those lies to her core. He had looked so defeated, that she really did worry that his spirit was crushed. If he needed time to brood, to work it out for himself, then she'd let him have all the space he needed.

  It was a long time before Tenet broke the silence. “What do you think will happen to Enna and Hark?”

  Scarab had been having a hard time with that question herself. Weevil assured her he had a plan, and while he might be a raving lunatic, he had never before failed to keep a promise to her. “Weevil's handling it.”

  “And you trust him?"

  Scarab glanced sidelong at him. "Do we have a choice?"

  Tenet gave a shrug. "I guess not." He turned to look back out the window. "You seem awful close to him."

  Scarab frowned and gripped the steering wheel tighter. "I've known him for years."

  "Still."

  It was one simple little word that carried a whole lot of meaning. "And just what is that supposed to mean?"

  "It means you're awful friendly with him, that's all."

  Her eyes went wide. "Are you saying...do you think I would..." she sputtered.

  Tenet felt his face burning and was glad it was dark in the vehicle. "I was just asking."

  "With Weevil?" she squeaked. She shook her head. "Unbelievable."

  "You have to admit he does seem pretty familiar with you."

  Scarab scoffed. "If you hadn't noticed, he seems that familiar with everyone." Tenet heard the real disgust in her voice. "Besides," she said after a minute. "What the hell business is it of yours what I have or have not done with anyone?"

  He opened his mouth, then closed it again. He was in hot water, that much was clear. He was going to tell her that since she was going to be his wife, then it most certainly was his business. Fortunately he stopped himself in time. A split second of extra thought let him see what a bad idea that would have been. "It's not. Forget I said anything."

  She let out a deep breath through her teeth, calming herself down. She knew what had driven Tenet's questions. They had been traveling together long enough for her to see the pattern of his thoughts. He was talking about Hark and Enna which would lead to Weevil which would lead to the plan... And at some point, they would need to calmly discuss the fact that they would be married. Calmly. "First of all, I never, never would have done anything with Weevil. I can't believe you think I would." She needed to get that straight. For some reason she didn't want Tenet to have any questions on that front. "Secondly, even though I'm going to be your wife, it's just a contract. Like I said before, it's not going to be the kind of wedding you're used to, or the kind of marriage you're used to. It's a means to an end."

  Tenet couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh. "And just what kind of marriage do you think I'm 'used to'?"

  Scarab glanced at him uncertainly. "Uh, you know. White dress, wedding cake, start of a life together. Love."

  He stared at her blankly for a minute before turning to watch the nothing of night. "A marriage contract for a couple at my station in life- my former station- is a business arrangement, and nothing more." It actually hurt to say it out loud. "I already told you my mother and father didn't love each other. Hell, they don't even like each other most days. She cheats on him and he..." he paused. He was about to say that his father probably did the same, but he couldn't imagine that. "Actually, he probably doesn't even have sex anymore. His idea of a good time is probably hearing his accountant detail his days' profits. I bet he even drinks champagne and plays soft music while it's happening, too."

  Scarab snorted at the image, and even Tenet smiled.

  "I know it's a contract, Scarab," he continued softly. "I never thought any different."

  For some reason, his admission hurt. "Yeah," she said quickly, "Just wanted to make sure we're on the same page."

  Tenet looked at her profile, lit green from the dashboard display. If he didn't know her better, he'd think she was as disappointed as he was. "Yeah. We're on the same page."

  Scarab cleared her throat. "Good. That's good, right?" She glanced at him. He was looking at her the same way he had right before he was going to kiss her, and when he opened his mouth to say something she cut him off. "So we should say what we expect."

  Tenet bit back what he was about to say. "What we expect?" he asked instead.

  "From the marriage. You know, like rules or something."

  "I don't want to make rules for you."

  She sighed. "Fine, not rules then. More like...stipulations. Clauses. All contracts have those, right?"

  Tenet assessed her for a moment. He knew by now that the more she pressed an issue, the more insecure she felt about it inside. It was her way of putting on a good front, and the revelation was certainly interesting. It meant she was unsure about what their marriage really was. He put the sudden hope in check. He had to go at her pace. "You're right," he said slowly. "Contracts do have stipulations and clauses. Do you have any in mind?"

  "No more whining."

  She said it so quickly that he had to laugh. "Not that you've been thinking about it or anything."

  "I mean it," she said, feeling like she was getting back on firm ground. "I hate the whining, Tenet."

  "I haven't whined once tonight."

  She had to concede. "But you could slip back into it like that." She snapped her fingers.

  "Fine. I won't whine if you don't give me a reason to."

  Scarab shook her head. "Now how can I promise that? We're driving into an unknown future. Well, unknown to you. I'm going to have to push and be a bitch and..."

  "Fine. I'll try not to whine."

  It was the best she would get. "Good. Now your turn to say something you expect."

  "I don't know," he said honestly. "I've never really thought about marriage before, and certainly not what I'd expect." He scratched the back of his head. "Um, I guess I wouldn't want my wife to be bitchy."

  Scarab rolled her eyes and gave him a bland look. "Then you're gonna have to find a different wife."

  He gave her a lopsided grin. "Then don't be excessively bitchy."

  "Fair enough. I don't cook."

  "Don't? Or can't?"

  "Won't," she said firmly. "I'll hunt it, skin it, and clean it. But the most you'll get is me throwing it in a pot of water if you actually expect me to cook."

  "I can cook."

  "You can?" She glanced at him. "Oh, that's right. Craft classes."

  He ignored the barb. "And I like to, so that's not a problem. I have no idea how to cook meat, though." He didn't say he'd much rather cook it than kill it, anyway.

  "You'll learn. Can't do any worse than me."

  He gave her a smile. "We're doing pretty good so far, huh?"

  "Yep."

  "Oh, while we're talking about food, I hate jelly."

  It was so far out of left field that Scarab let out a deep laugh. "Where the hell did that come from?"

  "It came from a life of my mother shoving jellies down my throat, that's where. I mean it. I absolutely hate jelly."

  "
Fruit jelly?"

  "All jelly. Anything jellied. It's all wobbly and wiggly and..." he shuddered. "It's a deal breaker." He made a chopping motion with his hand, loving the silly turn the conversation had taken. He'd spent too much of the night brooding. Hell, he spent too much of the last couple months brooding. He was heading into a new life and while he knew he'd have to address the mess of emotions later, it felt good to laugh.

  "No jelly for you, then," she said with a grin. "I don't like turnips."

  He feigned horror. "Don't talk like that!"

  "Or carrots, if you want to know my deepest, darkest secrets."

  He threw his hands in the air. "That's it! Stop the vehicle right now!"

  Scarab threw her head back and really laughed, and just like that, Tenet's mouth went dry. He ran a shaky hand through his hair and looked away, knowing his emotions would show on his face. He could do this. He could go into this marriage as a business deal and nothing more. For now. He had to. It didn't matter that she could stop his heart without doing anything more than laughing. He could handle it.

  "I take it you'd have a heart attack if I told you how I really feel about cucumbers, huh?"

  He cleared his throat and made his voice light. "I can't take another blow right now. Better just keep it to yourself until I'm stronger."

  Scarab's laugh faded to a chuckle. "Okay, so let's review. You stop whining, I won't be excessively bitchy, I'll hunt, you'll cook, and we both have foods we'd be happier without. Is that it?"

  Tenet thought for a second. "That's all I have for now. Should we leave it open for future amendments?"

  Scarab shrugged. "Seems reasonable. I mean, we don't have any clue what we're in for. It would be foolish to think things can't change along the way."

  Her words played over and over in his mind as they drove in companionable silence through the night. Things could change along the way. She admitted that herself. It was a small thing, but in a night that would swallow him with hopelessness if he let it, it was just the hopeful lifeline he needed.