He hesitated for several seconds and then sighed. “Okay. Not forever, mind you. I’m feeling impatient. But for now.”
“This is going to get complicated.”
He nodded in agreement. “It is.”
“My grandmother’s going to be disappointed, too.”
“Why?” He furrowed his brow. “She’s never been judgmental, Des.”
She blew out a breath. “I know you never fully understood what it was like for me to grow up in this town, half white, half black. It was never easy.”
“Des, you know color didn’t matter like that when my parents looked at you. Not for a second. And I’m not buying that it mattered to your grandmother, either.”
“You’re right, and your mother in particular made my childhood better than I could have ever hoped. She babysat me when Grandma had to work. She hugged me and told me she loved me. Me. A girl with no mother of her own. It meant the world to me. But to the rest of the town, I was never good enough. I’m not black enough for the black folks, nor am I white enough for the white folks.
“I was only about seven years old when Grandma gave me a serious lecture about how to face the struggles in my life. She told me the best way for me to be accepted by the rest of the town was to be a model citizen in all things. Never give anyone a reason to judge me. I think I did a pretty good job, but I walked a fine line. Even though a lot of people were supportive, I heard the rumors when Sean and I got engaged. I know some people had decided they could tolerate me living here, but marrying a white guy was crossing the line.”
Trent sucked in a sharp breath. “Des, I had no idea you experienced that. But I should’ve.”
She shrugged. “I didn’t tell you, or anyone for that matter. No one other than my grandmother, that is. But don’t you see? Switching brothers even after all these years would cause rampant rumors. Just think of what they’d say.”
“You’re strong. Ignore them. Why do you care what other people think?” He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs.
“I can’t afford to think that way, to ignore them. I’m not the only one I’m worried about, Trent. You don’t deserve the kind of harassment you’ll get if people find out we’re together. You haven’t lived with it your whole life, so you don’t get it.”
He shook his head. “I don’t give a single shit what the rest of the town thinks, Des.”
“You say that now…”
“I mean it. Nothing could possibly make me turn away from you.”
“Even if that weren’t an issue, there are about a dozen other factors in our way. I live in Dallas. I work weird shifts and I’m sometimes gone for days. You just got to town, and your job means that you have to be prepared to drop everything at a moment’s notice.” She glanced toward where she thought the ringing had come. “That call might even now mean you’re walking out the door and gone six months.”
His eyes closed and he set his forehead against hers.
She’d only been stating the facts. She also acknowledged that there was no way she could avoid exploring what a relationship with him might look like. Maybe if they went on a date or something, they would realize they didn’t even have that much in common anymore. It had been a long time. Both of them were basing their feelings on an inflated memory.
For a moment, she considered telling him she didn’t want to see him again. It was too hard. Too complicated. It would hurt too badly when it fell apart. It would also hurt too badly if he was killed on a mission. That much she knew firsthand. Even though she hadn’t been in love with Sean, she had loved him dearly, and she’d missed him terribly after he died. If anything ever happened to Trent…
But then the moment passed and she realized she would move hell and high water to spend even an hour with him halfway between Dallas and Killeen once every month if that was what it took.
Destiny decided maybe it would be better to throw everything into the ring and see what happened. Maybe he would agree to spend some time with her without telling anyone. That way, if they realized they didn’t have the spark they were imagining, no harm would be done.
His parents didn’t need to know. Nor did the town. Or even her grandmother. They could meet in secret and keep it to themselves.
It didn’t matter that logistically their lives were complicated. As long as he agreed to keep their relationship private, she was all-in. “Get the phone, Trent.”
As if he hadn’t been quick enough, a knock sounded at the door two seconds later.
Trent still held her gaze. “Fuck.”
She ran her hands up and down his back. “It’s okay. We waited a dozen years to say the things we blurted out this morning and last night. My heart is already lighter just knowing you’ll be thinking about me.”
“Every hour of every day.”
“Get the door.”
A voice called from outside. “Zip? Dude. What the hell?” More knocking.
Trent released her and backed up, still staring at her as he did so. It was a wonder he didn’t fall over something. Finally, he spun around and rushed the last few feet, yanking the door open. “I’m here.”
A man Destiny thought she remembered from the night before stepped inside. She hadn’t quite connected him with Trent’s buddies because he’d made a beeline for the bar when he came in. He was blond with blue eyes that were narrowed in a serious expression. When he caught Destiny out of his peripheral vision, he jerked his gaze to her and stopped moving.
Trent shut the door. “Destiny, this is Beau Talbot. We all call him Jangles.”
“Sorry, ma’am. I didn’t realize you were here. I should have remembered from last night.”
“It’s okay,” she responded in a soft voice. She stood plastered to the wall. Her position had to look awkward.
Jangles shifted his gaze to Trent. “Sorry, Zip. We gotta go. Now.”
Trent nodded. “Give me five minutes.” He raced from the room, heading for his bedroom, pausing long enough to cup her face and mouth, I’m sorry.
When he was gone, she looked at Jangles. “Why do you call him Zip?”
“Because that gnarly scar on his thigh looks like a zipper from the way they stitched him up. We all decided it was the perfect nickname the first week we met.”
She smiled. “Makes sense. It does look like a zipper. I never thought about it.”
“You’ve known him a long time, right?”
“Yes. I moved in next door to his family when I was five.”
“Right. You’re Destiny. I remember you. You were, uh…” He stopped talking.
Destiny was going to have to get used to this if she intended to stick her feet in the sandbox. They might be able to keep their relationship mum from his parents and the community, but his team would know everything. They probably already did know more than she could imagine. And hell, her girlfriends were also well aware of him. “Yes. I was engaged to his twin brother.”
Jangles nodded. “You should go talk to Zip while he packs. We don’t have much time.”
She liked Jangles immediately, and took his advice, spinning around to find Trent. Her heart was racing again, this time with nervous energy. She’d known he would leave eventually, but she hadn’t expected it to be this soon. She rushed to his bedroom, feeling awkward.
He was already dressed and tugging his duffel closed. He reached for her and hauled her against him, giving her his full attention. “This sucks.”
“Yeah.”
“Take your time here. Shower. Whatever you need to do. I’ll have Hatch come get you and take you back to your friends. His real name is Jason Nixon.”
“Don’t worry. I can have one of my girls come get me.”
“You’re sure?” His brow furrowed.
“Yes. I need to go see my grandmother this morning anyway and then we have to drive back to Dallas. I work tonight.”
He nodded, swallowing. “Don’t you dare fucking back out of this on me. The second I’m back in town, I’m heading to Dallas. I’ll take a fe
w days off if I can. I can’t say how long I’ll be gone.”
The last thing she wanted was for him to worry about her ghosting him. It wasn’t going to happen. She’d given him her word. “I understand your job better than most, Trent. I’ll be waiting. You just stay safe.”
His eyes slid closed and he pulled her closer, kissing her lips quickly. “Thank you.” He released her just as fast, hoisted his duffel, and heaved it onto his shoulder. As he left the room, he grabbed the door frame and looked back. “Spare key is in the right kitchen drawer. Take it. Use this place any time you want. If you’re in town, stay here.”
“Okay.” She couldn’t say more. Too much emotion welled up inside her.
Between one blink and the next, he was gone. She flinched as the door closed, leaving her in silence, a whirlwind of noise swirling around in her head nonetheless.
What the hell just happened?
Chapter 4
Two weeks later…
Trent sat in his black Corvette in front of Destiny’s condo, staring at the front door but not moving. He’d arrived in Killeen two days ago after his mission wrapped up, but he’d needed time to debrief and deal with the possible fallout from the mission.
For the first time in his career, he was concerned about retribution. His entire team was worried about him. He’d been exposed during the mission, his mask yanked off in an altercation with the enemy. They knew who he was. One of the downsides of advancement in facial recognition. It was unlikely he would get blowback from the event, but everyone was on edge anyway. Watching. Assessing. Monitoring.
Nevertheless, Trent had the weekend off. And thank fuck, so did Destiny. He wanted to spend the next two days reacquainting himself with the girl he’d fallen for as a teenager. At the same time, he was completely dumbfounded at the thought of seeing her again. Their conversation two weeks ago in his apartment had been rushed and abruptly cut off. He’d thought about her every day since that morning, but until last night, he hadn’t been able to contact her.
He’d also been too tongue-tied to call, so he’d sent her a text and then been relieved to find out she was currently in Seattle, but she would be back Friday afternoon.
Trent figured he’d beaten her to her condo, so he was still sitting in his car, staring at her door, fidgeting in his seat. He feared this was about to be the most awkward first date in the history of first dates. He’d never gone out with a woman after dumping his heart at her feet, and he doubted she’d ever done so either.
Hell, it seemed like neither of them had really had any serious relationships at all, considering they’d both been harboring feelings for each other extending back to high school.
The hardest part about coming to Dallas for the weekend had been explaining himself to his mom. So far, since moving to Killeen, he’d seen his parents a sum total of two times for about five minutes, so his mother definitely didn’t understand what on earth he needed to do for the weekend that was more important than coming over to the house for a longer visit. And Trent wasn’t about to tell her a single detail. Destiny thought it was important, and he sort of understood. After all, she was partially right about his mom. If they told her anything, she would get her hopes up. There was no guarantee that this thing they were exploring would end with them together. No sense giving his mother false hope.
Destiny had also made it clear that she didn’t want them to be a public item. She was too embarrassed to face his parents. Trent had argued with her at the time that his parents might be shocked, but they would not be judgmental. He couldn’t visualize any world in which his mom would think it was wrong for Trent to be dating Destiny. She’d probably be thrilled. Arguably too thrilled. He had to concede that point.
In moments of downtime during the past two weeks, Trent had warred with himself about confronting Destiny and nipping this secretiveness in the bud. But now he had a new problem. His last mission had been in Kazarus. The head of the Kazarus Freedom Army had Trent’s identity, and the man was furious. Trent needed to lie low for a while.
The last thing he wanted was for Onur Demir to scope out anyone important in Trent’s life and possibly come after Destiny or even his parents. So, he would use her demand to keep their relationship quiet to his advantage and play along. That would limit his contact with his mom and dad, and keep Destiny hidden.
He glanced at his watch. It was five o’clock. She said she would be home by five thirty as long as the flight wasn’t delayed. He reached across to the passenger seat and tugged a worn envelope from the side pocket of his duffel. The edges were frayed and yellowing. He’d read the pages inside more times than he could count over the years. He’d never shared the letter with a living soul. He didn’t plan to today, either. Perhaps one day he would need to.
The letter was from Sean, and every time Trent held the pages, he choked up. His brother. The person with whom he’d shared a womb and had rarely separated from for eighteen years. The person he owed his life to. His best friend in the world.
Sean had written Trent this letter three days before he was killed in action. It had arrived a week after his death and left Trent shattered beyond belief. It still did every time he opened it. Trent had wondered for a decade if Sean had had some sort of premonition and thought he might be killed. Trent would never know.
Trent didn’t open the letter now. It wasn’t necessary. He knew what it said. He only pulled it out because it comforted him and gave him strength. It made him feel closer to his brother. In a way, forgiven for what he was about to do.
He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths, telling himself over and over that Sean would want Trent to be happy. He would definitely give his blessing if Trent pursued Destiny. He’d want Destiny to be happy, too.
Trent stuffed the letter back in his duffel. He was in no way prepared to share the letter with her. If by chance things between them didn’t work out, she never needed to know it existed. Besides, he didn’t want the letter’s contents to influence her. Trent wanted to know in his heart that Destiny would choose him no matter what. If they managed to build something solid, there would come a time in the future when Trent would share the private correspondence, but not now, and certainly not until Trent was positive Destiny was fully into him on his own merit.
Trent nearly jumped out of his skin when a knock sounded against the window next to his head. He yanked his eyes open and turned to find Destiny standing beside his Corvette. She was biting her lower lip as she stepped back.
He opened the door to step out. Damn, she looks good, even in her uniform. The navy pencil skirt landed above her knees. She had on navy pumps, a white blouse with the Open Skies airline logo in the corner, and a matching navy jacket. She’d pulled her hair back in a loose bun.
He found himself nervous as a teenager as he faced her, shutting his car door without looking and then tucking the tips of his fingers in the back pockets of his jeans.
“You beat me here,” she commented. “How long were you waiting?”
“Just a few minutes. I made good time.”
She shrugged her purse up higher on her shoulder and nodded toward her apartment. “Come on. Let’s go inside.”
He reached for the roller bag she was pulling to take it from her, their fingers brushing against each other as he did so. That simple touch was enough to send a spark through his body. This thing between them was crazy. He prayed they could get over this awkward stage quickly and move on. He longed to hold her tightly in his arms.
Without a word, he followed her to her front door and waited while she unlocked it and pushed it open. When he stepped inside, he was surprised to find her roommate standing in the kitchen.
Destiny had told him she lived with one of her posse, Libby, last night in a text, but she hadn’t said when or if Libby would be home. She had her own crazy flight schedule.
Part of Trent was disappointed. He’d wanted to be alone with Destiny. Another part of him felt relief. Having another person in the room might cut th
rough some of the initial awkwardness.
“Hey,” Libby said as she rounded the island to cross into the living room. She was holding a bottle of water, and she’d obviously been there a while because she was wearing black track shorts and a fuchsia tank top. Her thick wavy hair was pulled back in a ponytail. She smiled at Trent and held out a hand. “You made it. I’m Libby, if you forgot.”
“Des told me.” He shook her hand and then turned his attention to Destiny.
“Right, well, if you don’t mind,” Destiny said, “I’m just going to take a quick shower. I hate how I feel after I step off of a long flight.”
“I understand. Go ahead.”
“I’ll keep him company,” Libby stated.
Destiny sighed. “Okay, but don’t grill him. He’s a good guy. He doesn’t require vetting.”
Libby flattened a hand on her chest, eyes wide. “I don’t grill your dates.”
“Yes, you do. Every time.” Destiny took her roller bag from Trent and pulled it toward the stairs.
He considered offering to carry it up for her but decided that was too forward. She could obviously handle it. She’d been doing so for years without any help. It wasn’t in his nature to watch a woman haul luggage around, but it was even less in his nature to invite himself into her bedroom when he’d only been inside her apartment for two minutes.
“I’ll be quick,” she said as she disappeared up the stairs.
“Have a seat.” Libby pointed at the beige sofa. “Can I get you anything to drink? Water? Beer? Soda?”
“Water would be great. Thanks.” He turned around and surveyed the room while she headed for the refrigerator. It was a standard condo with beige carpeting and walls. There was an entertainment center across from the sofa, a matching love seat, end tables, and a coffee table. To bring some vibrancy to the room, the women had added jewel-toned throw pillows and colorful framed art.
Destiny's Delta (Special Forces: Operation Alpha) (Delta Team Three Book 2) Page 4