by Sherri Renee
I jumped up and propped my hands on my hips. “I think that does it for today. Everyone needs to be here at three sharp for the pep rally tomorrow. Don’t forget we’re wearing French braids.”
Everyone broke off into smaller groups as we gathered our stuff. I put my coat on over my workout clothes and grabbed my gym bag. Michelle put an arm around my waist and squeezed me in a side hug.
She didn’t say anything, but I could read the look in her eyes. She felt sorry for me about George. I leaned into her hug for a second and sighed. I felt sorry for me too.
“Want to do some dress shopping with me?” I asked Michelle as we walked to our lockers. She already had her prom dress, a long purple sleeveless dress with a fitted bodice and flowing train. I, on the other hand, was still on the hunt for the perfect creation.
“Oh,” Michelle stopped beside my locker while I grabbed my books. “Danny asked me to get something to eat with him after he gets out of practice. She pulled out her phone and checked the time. “I could go with you for a little while, though.”
“Don’t even think about it,” I told her. “You know you want all that time to get ready for your date. I’ll probably just stop by Harold’s, and see if they have any new dresses in. I’ll text you pictures if I find anything.”
“Hey, beautiful.”
I rolled my eyes at Michelle before closing my locker and turning to face George.
“Hey,” I said with absolutely no enthusiasm. His brows bunched and I prepared for a tongue lashing, but he saw Michelle standing beside me.
His whole expression changed. “Hey, Michelle. I hear you and Danny have a hot date tonight.”
“Something like that,” Michelle said with an even look. “I’ve got to run. Text me.”
“What’s her deal?” George grumbled as she hurried away. “You didn’t tell her anything about us, did you? Because that’s private and sharing stuff like that could get someone in trouble. Someone like that kid in the hall yesterday.”
I stood and glared at him. I was already sick of him threatening me every day.
“Look,” George let out a sigh and sounded defeated. “I’m sorry, okay? I’ve got so much pressure on me right now. It’s like everything’s coming to a head with the playoffs and prom.” He slouched against the locker beside mine and tucked his hands in his pockets, staring down the hall.
“My dad keeps pounding on me every day about college.” He frowned. “He just lost his new job, too, so I’ve picked up a few extra hours at the garage to try to help out at home. It’s not like I can support a family on a part-time job though.” He shrugged and kept his stare on some fixed point down the hall.
I reached out and put my hand on his arm. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know all that was going on.” Not many people knew it, but he’d confided that his dad had a drinking problem. I wondered if it had something to do with him losing his job.
My heart ached for him. I couldn’t imagine trying to support my family much less do it while trying to earn a scholarship and get into a fairly picky college.
I leaned on the locker beside him. This was the George I knew. The guy I’d fallen in love with. I felt guilty now for the things I’d been thinking and saying about him.
“Even with all that, it doesn’t excuse the way you treated that boy yesterday.” I hesitated and drew in my lips. “Or the way you’ve been acting towards me.”
“I know.” He nodded. The back of his hand rested against mine. I tensed as he slipped his fingers into mine. I wasn’t sure what I felt or what to think. He’d messed up majorly, but all of the times he’d been sweet while we were dating came back to me. He wasn’t a monster.
“I’ve been a jerk.” He swallowed and looked down at me. “Can we start over?”
His eyes met mine with such gentleness, I squeezed his hand. My heart longed for Matt, but what did I really even know about him? He had a nice side and gave me chills? George, on the other hand, had been part of my life for almost a year. I had fun with him.
For a while, I’d been glancing at the wedding dresses while I searched for a prom dress. I mean, I was in no way ready to get married now, but I could vaguely see George filling that role someday in the future. That all had to count for something, didn’t it?
“Can we?” George asked again, turning to face me. “I really need you right now.”
Part of me wanted to say absolutely not. But another part of me thought maybe this was just a bump in the road. Something we could work out. All couples went through hard times.
I licked my lips and nodded. “We can try. You can’t go around being mean to people though,” I said. “Or messing around with other girls.”
He looked relieved and thankful. He leaned towards me, and I cringed, remembering our last kiss. This kiss was sweet though. Gentle. It didn’t send any chills up my spine, but it was warm and familiar.
“I need you to keep me in line, okay?” He looked at me earnestly. “Kristen, I don’t know what would happen to me if I didn’t have you. I get so wrapped up in everything. Sometimes I feel like I’m going to explode. I need you to remind me to cool things down if you see me getting to that point.”
That was a pretty big responsibility. I wasn’t sure I was up to it. I hadn’t been able to calm him down in the hall yesterday. If he was willing to try I guess I was too. I gave him a tentative nod, and he smiled, hugging me tight.
“I’ve got to go.” He sounded like he regretted the fact. “Are we on for the party at Tony’s house tomorrow night after the game?”
I worked up a tiny smile. “Sure.”
He gave my hand a final squeeze. I stood, for the second time that day, watching a guy walk down the hall away from me.
Chapter 15
I was so confused. I drove home in a daze, wondering if I’d done the right thing. I didn’t exactly feel elated that George and I had worked things out. I felt more . . . disappointed?
And what was I going to tell Matt? I knew he thought the very worst of George, and a lot of his opinion was my fault. I could only imagine what he’d think of me when he found out we were back together.
I drove past Matt’s house extra slow half-way hoping I’d see him. His car wasn’t there. I decided I was relieved. I wasn’t ready to talk to him. I didn’t know how to explain I really did like him but felt I owed George something.
I parked in the garage, noting Mom’s car wasn’t there, so I headed straight upstairs to take a shower. Deciding the last thing I felt like doing was dress shopping, I slipped on some warmups and a sweatshirt.
I blow-dried my hair and curled it but didn’t put on any makeup. I didn’t plan on seeing anyone tonight. Maybe I could even get out of dinner with my parents.
I went to the window and looked down the street wondering where Matt was, and if he was thinking about me. I trailed a finger down the cool glass. My stomach clenched. I tried to swallow what felt like a lump in my throat. I needed to tell Matt where things stood. I couldn’t leave him hanging. After that, though, I needed to put him out of my mind.
If things didn’t work out with George, maybe Matt and I would have a chance to see if there was anything between us. I couldn’t count on that though. Matt could have a girlfriend at the snap of his fingers. He wasn’t going to sit around and wait to see if George and I were going to make it. And I didn’t blame him.
I dug my phone out of my purse, pulling a couple of gum wrappers with it. I tossed them in the trash and plopped on the bed, scrolling through pictures of me and George. We looked like a happy couple. Had we been though?
I glanced at the pictures of us at the fair. The one at the top of the Ferris wheel was my favorite. George had his arm around me. I was wearing a bright orange tank top and snuggled close to his side.
We’d had fun that night. He’d even won me a stuffed rabbit by tossing rings around bottlenecks. I went and picked the pink rabbit up from my bookshelf and stared at it as if it held some answers. Instead of answers, it brought another memor
y to mind that I guess I’d blocked out.
When George won the ring toss the girl working the booth had tried to give him a plastic pair of dice. She said you had to win two times in a row to win the larger prize and pointed to the sign that spelled out the rules. George wasn’t having it. He’d made a huge scene until the poor girl gave in and gave him the rabbit just to shut him up.
I felt the embarrassment now that I’d felt then. George had blown it off. Had made it sound like the games people were always trying to cheat the players. That wasn’t the only time he’d bullied someone into giving him his way. I always excused it. Wrote it off as the other person’s fault. Looking back now, it was usually George causing problems.
Had I made a mistake giving George another chance?
I thought about his dad’s drinking problem, and the pressure on him to carry the football team to state. He had so much going on in his life. Things I couldn’t even imagine. I figured if I had all that stuff in my life I might lash out sometimes too. At the same time, he wasn’t the only one with issues and not everyone took it out on other people.
The loud thumping of Matt’s music interrupted my thoughts. I ran to the window to watch his car pull into his driveway. He got out and looked straight up at me like he knew I’d be there. He smiled and waved when he saw me.
My heart flipped with a spark of happiness at the same time my stomach dropped with disappointment. I lifted my hand in a half-hearted wave. Why was I so happy to see him when I’d just promised George another chance?
Matt walked towards his front door and pulled his phone out of his pocket to make a call. A second later my phone rang.
It was still laying on my bed. I dove for it and answered after the first ring. “Hello?”
“Hey,” Matt’s voice swept through the phone. Just the sound of his voice made me regret my decision about George.
“Hey,” I said, flipping over to lean against a pillow. “How’d you get my number?”
“Michelle,” he said. “You don’t mind do you?”
“No.” I swallowed and held the phone against my ear with both hands.
“I’m going to walk AB. Do you want to come?”
“Now?”
“Yep.” I could hear her happy yips and knew he’d made it inside. “I just have to grab her leash.”
“All right. I’ll meet you out front in a couple of minutes.”
“See you then.”
He hung up, and I sat there holding the phone. Spending time with Matt was probably a very bad idea. It would give me a chance to tell him about George though. I put on some shoes and grabbed my coat, slipping my phone in my pocket. I jogged downstairs and found Matt sitting on the front step with AB waiting for me right outside.
Matt’s face lit with a gorgeous smile. I stopped in the doorway and simply stared at him. How was I going to do this? All I wanted was to spend time getting to know him, and here I was about to push him away. AB let out an excited bark and strained against her leash to get to me.
I laughed and jogged down the steps to pet her. “Hi, there!” I rubbed her ears. She flopped down in the dead grass, rolling over so I had full access to her belly.
“She likes her belly rubs.” Matt squatted beside me while I pet her warm tummy.
“She’s so soft.” I rubbed her with both hands. She ate it up, wiggling back and forth on the brown grass.
“She’s also spoiled.” Matt laughed and leaned towards me for a kiss.
I jumped up and shoved my hands in my pockets. “Where are we heading?”
Matt stood and gave me a curious look. “I thought we’d take her to the park if you’re up for it.”
The dog park was about five blocks away. I glanced up at the overcast sky. “Sure. I’ll text my parents and let them know where I am so they don’t worry if they get home before me.”
We started walking side by side towards the park with AB running in front of us. She kept her nose to the ground running from one smell to the next.
I hadn’t had time to think about how to tell Matt George and I were giving things another shot. Now that I was beside him, so close I could brush my fingers against his, I found I didn’t want to tell him at all.
“So, pretty strange running into you at the library today,” Matt said.
“Literally,” I laughed, but my laughter died quickly. “I wanted to see you,” I admitted. I kept my eyes on the sidewalk and waited to see what he would say about that.
“I hoped that was the case.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “I don’t like acting like I don’t even know you at school. It’s not really my style to play games like that.”
I didn’t figure it was. He wasn’t the type of guy to play games at all, and yet here he was willing to put on a big act for me. I couldn’t stop my sigh. He grabbed my hand and stopped walking. AB gave a hard pull on her leash, eager to be on her way, but when Matt didn’t budge she contented herself with sniffing the grass in the yard beside us.
“What’s wrong?” Matt tipped my chin up until our eyes met.
I wanted to jerk away. I didn’t want him reading anything in my expression. On the other hand, what good would it do to delay the inevitable? I needed to tell him what was going on and get it over with.
“You don’t know me very well,” I started, and glanced over as a car drove by.
“I hope that will change very soon,” Matt said quietly.
Why did he have to be so sweet? I stepped back so he was no longer touching me, hoping I’d be able to think more clearly if he wasn’t so incredibly close. And didn’t smell so incredibly good. And wasn’t looking at me with that incredibly longing look.
“I need to just say this, okay?”
“All right.” Now Matt sounded confused. I could hardly blame him.
I blew out a huff of air. “I’m giving George another chance.” I peeked at his face to gauge his expression, but it hadn’t changed yet. “A real chance,” I added.
“He’s been going through all this stuff with his parents and everyone’s dumping buckets of pressure on him about football and college. He hasn’t been himself lately, but he promised me he’s going to try harder.” Try harder? That sounded so lame when I said it out loud.
“So, you’re breaking things off with me?”
I couldn’t tell what Matt was thinking from his voice. It was calm and even and I wondered for a second if he really understood that was exactly what I was trying to do.
“I like you, Matt. So much, but . . .” But what? I sent Matt a pleading look, hoping he’d fill in the blanks.
Instead, he appeared to study me. I started to feel self-conscious under his unwavering stare and swiped a hand under my nose to check for a trail of snot or something. I shifted my weight from one foot to another. Just when I couldn’t take his appraisal for another minute he finally spoke one word.
“No.”
I narrowed my eyes. “No?”
“Isn’t that what George told you when you tried to break up with him?”
I could only blink at him, I was so shocked.
“Well, I’m saying the same thing. No. That guy gives you some sob-story excuses about why he’s treating you and half the school so bad and you fall for it? That doesn’t sound like the girl I thought you were. I’m not stepping back and letting you make a huge mistake with that Roid. He’s going to end up hurting someone, and it’s not going to be you if I can help it.”
My mouth dropped open as I worked to process his words. I blinked at him, snapping my lips back together. “I don’t know if that’s the most romantic or most stupid thing I’ve ever heard,” I said.
He just grinned at me and started walking again. I fell into step beside him unsure what to do now. I mean, if I wanted things to be over with him then they were over no matter what he said. But I liked the fact that he didn’t want to let me go. Even more, that he wanted to protect me from George.
Not that I needed protecting. I frowned at my feet. At least I didn’t
think I needed protecting.
Chapter 16
At the dog park, Matt bent to unhook AB’s leash from her collar so she could run around. The park was empty so she happily sniffed one spot after another. Leaves covered the ground from the giant oaks around the fence, giving her a lot of things to smell.
I sat on the bench by the gate and tucked my hands under my legs to keep them warm. I didn’t move away when Matt sat beside me.
He put his arm on the bench behind me not quite touching my back but close enough that I knew it was there. “Yesterday you said something about competing for me if I had a girlfriend.”
I still couldn’t believe I’d said that, but I nodded for him to continue.
“I feel the same way. I’m not going to step aside and hand you over to George.”
His eyes were on mine. I couldn’t look away. “I don’t play games, but I’m not opposed to winning your affection. I’m making a play for you Kristen McDonald, and I don’t give up easy.”
Those words played over and over in my head throughout the night and into the next day.
George and I were walking to the cafeteria and Matt came right up to me and said, “Hey neighbor. How’s it going?”
George grabbed my hand and glowered at Matt, but Matt’s smile didn’t falter.
“Hi,” I squeaked, pushing my hair behind my ear.
Matt’s eyes sparkled mischievously. “George.” He tipped his head at George before refocusing on me. “I’ll see you later. Maybe we can take AB for another walk.”
My eyes almost popped out of my head. I couldn’t believe he said that. He gave me a wink and continued down the hall.
“What the hell was that about?” George turned to watch Matt walk down the hall. “And who the hell’s AB?”
“AB’s his dog,” I said. “I don’t know what that was about.” But I did know exactly what it was about. Matt was pursuing me.
George handled it better than I expected him to. He didn’t blow up or make a scene, although he was unusually quiet during lunch. “I don’t want you talking to that guy,” George said as he walked me to my next class. “I don’t trust him. You’ve seen the way he dresses in that leather jacket and leather boots. I think he’s in a gang or something. He could be dangerous.”