by E. L. Todd
“That’s not why I’m sad. I just miss him. I hate that he’s not here. I thought I would get over it in a day or two, but I’m lost without him.” She shrugged. “I’m surprised I’m like this. It’s not like he’s not coming back.”
“It’s already been five days,” I said. “So only twenty-five more to go.”
“Every day is a lifetime for me…”
“I’m glad you aren’t worried about Layla because you have no reason to be.”
“She’s a major pain in the ass, but whatever. Finn would never hurt me.”
It was crazy to think I’d been against this relationship for so long. Now they were two of the most committed people I’d ever known. My brother, the biggest playboy ever, said he would marry her if he ever settled down. That was a big statement from someone like him. And the fact he loved her so openly was surprising too. “I’m here if you need anything.”
“I know, Colt.” She forced a light smile. “Thank you.”
“You want me to stay with you until he gets back?”
“No, of course not,” she said. “I’ve got Soldier, so I’m okay. He snuggles better than Finn, but he certainly doesn’t feel like Finn.”
I chuckled. “He’s a good dog. He’ll take care of you.”
“Yes, he’s my baby.” She leaned down and kissed him on the head. “I’ll probably make him a soft lap dog by the time Finn returns.”
“Probably?” I asked incredulously. “I think you already did.”
She shrugged. “Oh, well. If he gets mad, I’ll tell him it’s his fault. He’s the one who left.”
14
Pepper
A week had passed, and while I was eating normally again, I was still in a terrible mood. His bed wasn’t comfortable without him in it, and I worried about him constantly. Were they working him like a rented mule? Was he eating enough? Resting enough? When would he call me?
I was grateful to have Soldier for company. He was the best support I could have asked for. He understood something was wrong, so he comforted me all the time. The second I was home, he blanketed me in his affection. He quickly took Finn’s spot on the bed, cuddling right beside me like he was an actual human.
I was lying in bed, unable to sleep even though I was exhausted. I considered calling Finn, but I assumed if he could talk, he would call. It was unusually warm that evening, so Soldier was at the foot of the bed.
Then the phone rang.
It was Finn.
I grabbed the phone so quickly, I knocked it onto the floor. “Shit.” When I picked it up, I realized I had hung up on him somehow. “Dammit.” I lay back down and called him back, hoping I could get through.
He answered. “Hanging up on me, baby?”
Just the sound of his voice, so deep and playful, was enough to bring tears to my eyes. “I miss you so much…” I couldn’t respond with the same casual banter because the emotion was too strong. I wanted to be supportive, but it was so difficult. I wanted him to come home and never leave. There was no way I could go through this again.
He was quiet over the line, absorbing my sadness. “I miss you too, baby.”
“It’s been a week, but it feels like a month.”
“It’s definitely been the longest week of my life.”
I was complaining, but I was the one enjoying the comfort of a beautiful house and amenities. He was working in dangerous conditions with little sleep. “How are you?”
“Tired.”
“What was your week like?”
“I was in the field the entire time, treating patients in the area. I was in one of the stadiums most of the time. I slept in a sleeping bag on the floor and didn’t shower. Didn’t even get to brush my teeth. No way to charge my phone. I would have called sooner if I could.”
“That sounds terrible…” But if those were the conditions, then Layla had no chance of seducing him.
“It wasn’t so bad. It’s not forever.”
“Where are you now?”
“They took us a few hours out of the zone so we could stay at a hotel. I took a shower and ordered some terrible room service, but it was also the best thing I’ve eaten in a week.”
So that bitch was nearby. She’d probably come to his door in her underwear. “I’m glad they are giving you a break.”
“Yeah. I have the day off tomorrow. Then I’m back in the field for another week.”
“I hate that they are overworking you.”
“Don’t. I signed up for this. I don’t mind helping people.” Finn was too strong to complain. He was too selfless.
It made me love him more. “I’ll make you something good when you get home.”
He chuckled. “I’ll order a pizza instead.”
“Hey, I’m not that bad.”
“You burned the stew that time. How does that happen?”
“Come on, that only happened one time.”
“But how?” he countered. “How do you burn a soup? Only you could accomplish that.”
I pulled the sheets to my chest and turned on my side, feeling better now that we’d been talking for a while. “Soldier misses you.”
“Change the subject…”
“He does.”
“I bet he’s happy I’m gone. Gets you all to himself.”
“No. He’s definitely the happiest when he has both of us.”
He sighed over the line, like he was getting comfortable in bed. “This is the most comfortable thing I’ve slept on in a week… The only thing missing is you.”
“And Soldier.”
“No. I just want you right now.” He turned quiet and let his final words float in the silence between us.
It’d been a week filled with soul-crushing pain, so sex was the last thing on my mind. If he were here, that would be a different story.
“Can I have you, baby?”
Knowing Layla was just a few doors away made me want to be whatever he wanted. I should feel grateful that I was the one who got all of his attention. I needed to put aside my sadness and be what he needed. “I’ve never done that before.”
“Just pretend I’m there. I put a vibrator in the drawer.”
“You what?” I blurted.
“You heard me. He’ll have to do while I’m not there.”
“So you want me to get off with a vibrator?”
“I want my lady satisfied while I’m not there. And I prefer a toy to another man. So put the camera on and let me see you. I could open my laptop and watch something dirty, but I would much rather watch you. Come on, baby.”
My cheeks blushed when I listened to his request. It was romantic, to hear him beg to see me because he preferred it to porn, preferred me to the women with perfect figures and big tits. “Alright.”
“There’s my girl.” A smile was in his voice. “I want you in blank panties. Nothing else. I love those tits.”
“I’m not wearing any makeup.”
“You don’t need any makeup. I always want to fuck you harder in the morning than at night.”
“Well, I want you wearing nothing at all.”
“Consider it done. I’ll call you back in a second.” He hung up.
I did as he asked and pulled on a black thong. I fluffed my hair and lay on the bed, my tits feeling the cold air once my t-shirt was gone. I found the vibrator in his nightstand where he said it would be. It was still in the package, like he wanted me to know he’d really bought it for this occasion and it hadn’t been previously used.
He called back using his camera.
I took the call and held the phone above me.
He sat up against the headboard, naked with his throbbing dick against his stomach. His tattoos and muscles were visible because his bedside lamp was on. He had a bottle of lube next to him, and he’d already squirted the liquid all over his length.
It looked even bigger on screen.
He took in the sight of me as he released a deep breath. “Fuck…that’s exactly what I wanted to see.” His hand wrapped a
round his length, and he started to jerk himself hard, like he was so aroused his head was about to explode. “Just like that, baby…”
Connecting with him comforted me in his absence. It made missing him a little easier, like we were in a long-distance relationship but the separation wouldn’t last long. I would only get to talk to him once a week until he came back, but I could live with that.
I worked for the next few days, putting in longer hours since I had nothing else to do. The only thing waiting at home for me was a dog. I organized the storage unit in the back of the store, did a deep clean of the front, and reorganized everything. Thankfully, I’d booked a few bridal parties over the weekend, so I had something to keep me busy.
It seemed like I’d stepped back in time when the bell above the door rang. Just like on that sunny afternoon, a handsome man walked inside, someone who didn’t belong in my store. With a smile brighter than the desert sun, he looked at me with his kind eyes as he approached the counter.
Now I was over six months in the past.
I could hardly believe what my eyes were seeing. “What are you doing here?” It was rude and abrupt, but I hadn’t expected him to stop by the store ever again. With the exception of that late night at dinner, I didn’t think we would ever cross paths.
“Just picking up something for myself.”
He was there to buy lingerie for his new woman? That was awkward. “Oh…”
“You don’t realize I’m kidding…” He gave a self-conscious smile, a dimple visible in each cheek. His eyes were green with vibrancy, and his handsome features overshadowed his good soul. He seemed too kind for a man so attractive. “I’m definitely kidding.”
“Oh, okay,” I said with an awkward laugh. “That would have been weird.”
“Yes, it would have.” He rested one hand against the edge of the counter and stared at me.
I waited for an explanation of his appearance.
It never came.
“What brings you here, Jax?” I’d spent my entire morning thinking about the dirty thing I’d done with Finn a few nights ago. I’d never been so adventurous like that, but with Finn, it felt easy. And he seemed to enjoy it, which made me enjoy it more. It was also a big fuck-you to Layla. Hopefully, she could hear him moan through the wall.
“Well…I kinda haven’t stopped thinking about you.”
Oh shit. That wasn’t good.
He tapped his fingers against the counter, wearing a t-shirt and jeans. He probably wore a suit when he showed houses in nice areas, so he must be off today. He came to my shop to talk to me, but he could spend his time picking up any woman he wanted. It was hard to believe he was here, still interested in me. “I made a mistake with the whole Colton fiasco. I was just so into you that I got jealous easily, even insecure. That’s not like me at all. I’m over thirty, and I’ve never had a real relationship with anyone because I’ve never been invested. But with you…I didn’t see it coming. Here I am, months later, still thinking about one woman. So, I’d really like it if we could get a cup of coffee or something. Bring Colton if you want, I don’t care.” He obviously had no idea Finn and I were together. He must have assumed we were two friends getting dinner. It wasn’t that crazy since Finn and Colton were brothers. Would I really date my ex-husband’s brother?
In my case, yes. If Finn knew this was happening, he wouldn’t like it one bit. He wasn’t the jealous type, but he wouldn’t appreciate my ex hitting on me. It seemed important to Finn that Jax knew we were together, and now I regretted not mentioning that to Jax sooner. “Jax, I’m seeing Finn.” I hated to crush his spirit and humiliate him, but there was no better response. That was the truth.
He didn’t react at first. It seemed to take him time to transfer the information into his brain. When it finally hit him, his eyes slowly fell in disappointment. “Oh…I didn’t realize. I just thought you two were just friends.”
“We aren’t. We’ve been together for a few months now.” I didn’t want to hurt Jax because he was a good guy, but I knew Finn was up front about his relationship status with me when women hit on him. I needed to be just as loyal.
“So you started dating him when we broke up?”
“Basically.”
He nodded slowly. “Colton didn’t have a problem with that?”
“He did at first. But then he got over it.”
“So, it must be pretty serious, then. I can’t imagine a guy screwing over his brother like that unless he had good reason.”
It might not end in marriage, but it was serious to me. “I love him.” That was a hurtful thing to say, but I couldn’t sugarcoat my feelings. I didn’t want Jax to waste any hope on me. “And he loves me.”
Jax bowed his head and looked at the floor as his hand tightened on the counter. An angry laugh escaped his lips. “Damn. I should have just let the Colton thing go…” He sighed then faced me again. “I’m not sure why it bothered me so much at the time. Colton was never my competition. Apparently, Finn was. Was he the guy you kissed?”
When Jax and I were together, we’d both had moments with other people. At the time, Jax never asked who it was, so I never had to tell him. “Yes.”
His eyes filled with disappointment again. “So you wanted him the entire time?”
“It wasn’t like that, Jax. I liked you. I just didn’t want to move as fast as you wanted. It was a lot of pressure. When you dumped me, I was sad about it.”
“You say we went too fast, but you just told me you’re in love with him.”
“Yeah…” I couldn’t come up with a good response to that. It made me look like a liar. “It just happened… I don’t know. I didn’t tell him I loved him until a few weeks ago. It’s not like it happened overnight or the day you and I broke up.”
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m interrogating you when you don’t owe me anything.” He slid his hands into his pockets. “I’ve never been in a relationship before, so I’m not very good at them, apparently. I wish I’d done things differently.”
“Me too.”
He took a step back. “I’m glad I came here anyway. I guess I can get some closure.”
“Yeah…”
He turned around and prepared to walk out.
I felt bad about the direction of the conversation, but there was nothing I could do. It was better to let him be hurt than to give him hope.
He stopped and turned back around. “If it doesn’t work out, give me a call.”
“I think it is going to work out.”
He gave a slight nod. “You’re a special woman to make guys like us commit. He’s a lucky guy. Hope he doesn’t make the same mistakes I did.” He left the store and disappeared from the windows.
“Yeah…me too.”
15
Pepper
Finn called me a week later.
“How’s it going?” I lay in bed with Soldier dead asleep at the foot of the bed. It’d been almost two weeks since we last spoke, and I’d started to worry again.
“It’s been hectic. I didn’t get a day off last week because of all the work I had to do. There’re too many patients and not enough doctors. The critical cases take a lot of my time, and I have to stabilize them before we get to the hospital. And I’ve had to donate a lot of blood, so I’ve been more tired than usual.”
“Why are you donating blood?”
“We’re low, and I’m a universal donor.”
This man literally gave all of himself for other people. I couldn’t believe a man so cold on the surface could be so kind underneath. “Don’t overdo it. You can’t help anyone if you’re passed out.”
“Don’t worry about me, baby. I’m made of steel.”
“Stronger than steel.”
He stayed quiet on the phone.
“So, you’re at the hotel now?”
“Yeah. We arrived late last night. I was in the shower for like thirty minutes, then I passed out on the bed. Didn’t wake up until three in the afternoon.”
�
��Because you’re exhausted.”
“Tell me about it…”
“But everything else has been good?” I wanted to ask about Layla, but my pride inhibited me. I refused to give life to her presence in a conversation. Any time spent talking about her only gave her more power.
“Yeah…for the most part.”
I caught the shake in confidence at the end of that sentence. “What is it?”
“I’m not sure if I should tell you. I had an incident with Layla.”
“Of course you did…”
“I don’t think it’s worth talking about, but I feel weird not mentioning it. Makes me feel like I’m hiding something.”
“What did she do?”
“Came to my room last night wearing almost nothing.”
I was gonna bust her teeth out the next time I saw her. “She came into your room?”
“No. She tried to.”
“So she just stood at your hotel door naked?”
“Pretty much.”
That bitch… “What happened?”
“What do you mean, what happened? I shut the door and bolted the lock.”
I knew he wouldn’t take the bait, but it was disgusting that she kept trying. “Why does she want a man who would cheat on his girlfriend anyway? He would just do the same to her.”
“Pretty sound logic. Maybe she hasn’t thought it all the way through.”
“I know hate is a strong word…but I hate that bitch.”
He chuckled. “I’m not her biggest fan either. Nowadays, people take sexual harassment very seriously, but I feel like that’s exactly what’s happening to me. She’s persistent at getting me to see her naked, but since I’m a man, it’s no big deal. Double standard.”
“It’s true.”
“And I can’t just beat her up like a man. That’s how I usually solve my problems, but that won’t work.”
It could work for me.
“So I guess I’ll just wait until she loses interest.”
“If she hasn’t lost interest by now, she never will.”
“Fuck, I hope that’s not true.” He sighed before the sound of movement came over the line. “How’s my baby?”