by Margaret Kay
“To go in and rig the gas to blow,” Sloan finished his sentence without missing a beat.
“I’m sure she kept the doors locked, but we’ll double check with her when we go back around,” Mother said quietly.
“The gas valve and piping are too damaged to know if they were tampered with,” Sloan reported. “Based on the Fire Marshal’s report, she turned the stove on and then immediately went outside. So, it was maybe ten to twenty-five seconds later that the place exploded. If I were going to do it, I’d rig a timer on the stove that would blow the gas line thirty seconds after a burner was lit.”
Mother glanced back through the twisted and burnt debris that had been her house. “Keep that to yourself for now. She doesn’t need confirmation someone tried to kill her.”
“I think she already knows,” Sherman argued.
“Suspecting it and having physical proof are two different things. She’s not in a good place right now. I’ll fill her in when she can handle it,” Mother said.
“Wrong approach,” Sloan said. “Don’t keep anything from her. It will come back to bite you in the ass if you do.”
Sherman nodded his head in agreement. “You can’t protect her from knowing the truth and nor should you.”
“Didn’t you learn anything from me?” Sloan asked with a self-deprecating grin.
“I most certainly did. I told her right away how I felt about her and that I wanted her in my life,” Mother said with a hard stare at Sloan, who’d almost lost the woman he loved because he didn’t speak up and tell her how he felt.
“Okay, so you’re not making that exact mistake, you’re making a different one. She’ll hate you if she finds out, and you didn’t tell her,” Sloan said.
“I’m just trying to protect her,” Mother insisted.
“There is protecting and there is keeping her in the dark.” Sloan shook his head. “Don’t assume she can’t handle it, instead, help her to handle it if she can’t. That’s a form of protection too.”
“Sure is,” Sherman seconded.
Mother gazed between his friends, both of whom recently found the woman who they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with. They were both on the same page about this. That had to mean something. He nodded. Then the men circled back around to the front of the house, coming up to where Annaka still stood by the car.
“What did you find?” She asked, her eyes sweeping over all three men.
“When you left the house yesterday, are you sure the back door was locked?” Mother asked.
“Of course, it was,” Annaka answered. “I always keep that door locked. Since December, I’ve kept both doors locked, even when I was home.”
“It’s unlocked now, and I saw scratches on the lock. Someone picked it,” Sherman said.
Mother was not sure if the expression that settled on Annaka’s face was despair, numbing anger, or a sudden and intense nausea. She looked like she wanted to cry, throw up, and beat the living shit out of someone all at the same time. He wrapped his arms around her and held her rigid form close to himself. “Are you okay?” he whispered.
“I will be,” she mumbled. Then she drew in a deep breath and blew it out slowly.
He didn’t feel her relax any with the deep breathing she was doing.
Tango
Annaka remained sullen long after they returned to the office from her burnt home. Madison, Cooper and Lambchop were not there when they entered the building. They drove to Homer to meet with the rig worker’s union president. Mother was anxious to hear how that went. His gut was telling him that Davis’ pointing them towards the union was a desperate attempt to shift scrutiny off Carstairs.
When they returned to the motel and Annaka declined dinner, instead stating that she’d go take a shower and then go to bed, Mother got very worried. He turned to Sloan, who was jotting down everyone’s order to pass on to Madison and Cooper. They’d pick it up on their way back from Homer. “Order us both the pot roast dinner. I’m sure she’ll want it at some point this evening.”
Sloan nodded. “Is she okay?”
Mother wasn’t sure. “Yeah,” he said with little conviction. He entered the bedroom a few minutes later. The door to the bathroom was closed, and he heard the shower water running. He pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed the one person he knew could help her.
Dr. Lassiter answered on the first ring. “Hi Mother. How are things in Alaska?”
“Cold and dark with earthquakes, quite the destination,” he remarked sarcastically.
Lassiter chuckled. “I was wondering when I’d hear from you.”
“Really?” Mother asked. “Why is that?”
“How is your lady holding up?” He asked without answering Mother’s question. “She’s been through a lot.”
“Yeah, that’s why I’m calling. She’s been remarkably strong through all of it, but we went back out to her house today and there were indicators that the gas explosion was not an accident.”
“From what I’ve heard, that was pretty much what was thought.”
Mother heard the water shut off. “Joe, we found evidence the lock on the backdoor was picked. With this confirmation, I see a definite change in her. I’m worried.”
“She’s been through a lot in the last month,” Joe repeated. “It might just take a little time for her to process it.”
“She’s saying she wants to relocate to a tropical climate far away from oil rigs.”
“Can’t blame her,” Joe said.
“I think it’s a snap decision, a knee jerk reaction.”
“Are you calling because you want my opinion on how you can help her or are you calling to ask me to talk with her?”
Mother sighed. “I guess both.”
“Well, for you, I’d say you need to be there for her but give her time. Your first reaction is going to be to try to protect her and take care of her because that is who you are. And you can, to some extent, but you cannot shield her from it. Don’t let her become too dependent on you. That’s not good for her either.”
The bathroom door opened and Annaka came out dressed in her pajamas, with a towel wrapped around her head.
“And the other request?” Mother said.
“Yes, dial into a video chat, but Mother, I talk with her alone. You cannot be in the room.”
Mother was okay with that. He trusted Joe Lassiter completely. “Okay, give me about five minutes to talk with her and then I’ll dial in,” Mother said, gaining him a questioning gaze from Annaka.
“Talk with me about what?”
Mother took hold of her hands and drew her to the bed. He sat and pulled her to his lap. “Do you feel any better?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just feel numb and very tired.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m just glad you’re here.”
Mother embraced her and held her for a long minute. “I’ll always be here for you. I love you, Annaka. I’ll do anything I can to help you, that’s why I placed that call to someone who I know can help. We have a team shrink that we are required to talk with after just about every mission. His name is Joe Lassiter, and he’s good at what he does. I’d like you to talk with him.”
“A shrink? You think I need a shrink?”
“I think you’ve been through a lot. You were kidnapped by someone you trusted, who was then killed. Your house exploded, which looks like attempted murder, and Remi’s family was held to force her to alter that report. Joe can help your mind deal with all that. It’s no wonder you feel numb and exhausted.”
“I think I’ll feel better in the morning if I can get a good night’s sleep.”
“Annaka, how do you think we do what we do? The shit we see can really fuck with your head if you let it. Joe has a way of putting things into a different perspective. He can help you get past trauma and thoughts and feelings that could paralyze you if you’re not careful. I think your head is cluttered with thoughts, feelings, fears. I think talking with Joe could really help you and I�
��d like you to give it a shot.”
Annaka glanced away from him. “Sure,” she said softly.
It sounded like a surrender to Mother, but he’d take what he could get. “He’s a good guy and I trust him. Promise me you’ll open up to him about what you feel and be honest about what thoughts are swirling around in your head.”
Annaka breathed out a heaviness from her chest. “I’ll try.” She forced a brave grin.
Mother knew it was forced. He pressed his lips to hers and enjoyed a lengthy kiss. “Thank you. I’ll grab my tablet and make the call.”
Annaka stood. “Let me just blow dry this.” She pointed to the towel around her hair.
“Oh, and Annaka, just a warning. Joe has a lot of scars on his face and neck. He suffered burns and cuts when an IED exploded. He was captured by the enemy and didn’t get medical help for some time. Even with multiple plastic surgeries, the scars are still noticeable.”
Annaka was taken aback by his warning. “So, he was a soldier too.”
Mother nodded. “He suffered more than anyone I know, emotionally and physically. That’s what makes him so good at helping everyone else. No matter what it is, he’s been there. He knows how it feels. Firsthand. And he has common sense too.”
When Annaka finished blow drying her hair, she returned to the bedroom to find Danny seated on the bed with an open laptop on the mattress in front of him. His eyes shifted to her, and he smiled. “Here she is. Thanks, Joe.” He patted the spot beside him.
Annaka reluctantly went over to the bed. She sat and gazed at the monitor, at the man that was displayed. He did have very noticeable, red, angry scars on his face and neck. She was glad Danny had told her.
“Joe, meet Dr. Annaka Sanchez. Annaka, this is Dr. Joe Lassiter.”
“Hi Joe,” she said, forcing a warm-sounding greeting.
“Hello Annaka. It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
She glanced at Danny, wondering what he’d told this man about her. “Likewise.”
“Annaka, Joe reads all mission reports and knows what we relay in our status check-ins. He pretty much knows everything going on.”
“Danny and everyone with his group has been great. I’m very glad they’ve been here.”
Joe Lassiter immediately dismissed Danny. Annaka watched him leave the room. He closed the bedroom door behind himself. “Mother takes care of everyone. It’s who he is. But I’ve never seen him as worried about someone as he is about you.”
“Danny is very sweet. I really think if I can just get a good night’s sleep, I’ll be fine.”
“Someone broke into your house and rigged it to blow up. A good night’s sleep will not make that okay or make you feel fine about it.”
His frankness startled Annaka. “Wow, you don’t hold anything back, do you?”
The corners of his lips pulled up. “Only when someone is claiming they’re fine when they clearly are not, can’t be, shouldn’t be. Put an emotion to it. If it were me, I’d be pissed, scared, sad, just to name a few emotions.”
Annaka nodded. “Yes, all of those things.”
“And those feelings and whatever thoughts are going through your head have you feeling exhausted.” Joe said it as fact, wasn’t asking her.
She nodded again. “When I read the note from Remi, I immediately knew my house exploding wasn’t an accident. But getting confirmation of it today,” she paused and shook her head.
Dr. Lassiter let her pause hang, waiting for her to continue. When, after a full minute, she was still silent, he prompted her. “Getting confirmation made you feel what?”
“I don’t know. Overwhelmed, maybe.”
“Mother said you plan to relocate.”
“Yes. I’ve given it a lot of thought. After all that’s happened, I don’t want to be here any longer.”
“What about your work?”
Annaka felt the sting of tears filling her eyes. “I love my work, have loved my life. But those feelings are not tied to this place. And I have to believe that I will feel just as good about another position in a different place where people aren’t trying to kill me.”
“So, you don’t think this will be resolved or that you will feel safe there in the future?”
“Let’s just say I don’t want to stick around and find out. Plus, four years ago when I moved here, I never meant it to be a permanent move. It was an opportunity I’m glad I took, but I think this is the perfect time for me to move on. I very much prefer a warmer climate. Florida sounds good to me right now.”
Joe Lassiter smiled. “I’d bet after months of short days and long stretches of darkness that you’d be ready for sunshine and warmth.”
“That I am,” she agreed.
“What about Mother?”
A smile lit her face. “He’s a part of my future.”
Lassiter chuckled. “I’m glad to hear that. The man would be upset if you felt any other way.”
“He is an amazing person and I’m not sure I’d be alive right now if it weren’t for him and the others who came in December. He knew I was in trouble and he convinced his boss to let them come. That in itself is incredible. I don’t know what Patrick Keeling’s plan was or if those two men would have come back and killed us. I think it’s the unknowns that are the worst. I don’t know who ordered any of this or if they’ll ever be caught. I want them to be held accountable. Even though Patrick was a participant in it, he’s dead because they set it in motion, whoever they are.”
Joe Lassiter watched her as she spoke. Her feelings shifted from sadness and fear to a determination he recognized. She wanted justice and wasn’t sure she’d ever get it. “The unknown is always the hardest thing to deal with. It’ll drive you crazy if you let it. Is that part of why you want to move away? If you’re not there, you can no longer be a target? If you’re not there, you think you won’t think about it?”
“I think I’ll feel safer. Or at least maybe I’ll move on and not think about everything that happened as much.”
“The problem with moving away is that you move all your thoughts and fears with you. You won’t have the daily reminders, but the thoughts will still be with you.”
“So, you don’t think I should move?”
“I think you should do what feels right to you, but I just caution you to really give it thought and know why you are. If it’s to get away from a possible threat or your fear of that threat, get yourself a good security system and find a good counselor to talk with. And above all, don’t bury what you’re feeling. You need to deal with it, or you’ll never move past what happened. It’ll come back in debilitating ways when you least expect it.”
“PTSD,” she said.
Lassiter nodded. “Mother told me you were one smart lady. I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know. Sometimes though, it’s just hard to see it clearly when you’re in the middle of it.” He watched her yawn. He knew she’d hit her end point in this discussion for now. “I should let you get some dinner and then get some sleep. Try to stick to your normal routine. That’ll help too.”
“I’ll try,” she said, her stomach already feeling hungry.
“If you get stuck and can’t work through your feelings, please feel free to call me. Even if you just want to talk more, call. Mother can get you back in touch with me.”
“I will. Thank you, Joe.”
“It was nice talking with you, Annaka.”
When Mother closed the bedroom door, reentering the living room, Cooper and Madison were just entering the suite from the hall with food bags in hand. “Where’s Annaka?” Cooper asked.
“Talking with Lassiter. Seeing her place burned to the ground hit her hard.”
“I think it was more knowing the backdoor lock was picked,” Sherman added.
Cooper’s eyebrows lifted.
“The backdoor was unlocked. Picked,” Mother clarified. “I called Joe and asked him to speak with her. I’m worried about her, Coop.”
Cooper nodd
ed. “Well, you’re not going to like this then. I spoke with Shepherd after we left the union president, who has been pushing for increased water testing and safety for the rigs.”
“We don’t think the union had anything to gain,” Lambchop added. “They don’t care about increased revenues from union dues.”
“What did Shepherd say that I’m not going to like?” Mother asked.
“We’re flying out tomorrow night,” Cooper replied.