by Nick Poff
“After they were married Ernie managed the store for his father. He was the one who orchestrated the move to North Main Street. It didn’t do any good, though. Apparently Floyd was a total dumbass when it came to money, and no matter what Ernie did, the store never really took off in the new location. So when Floyd gave up and sold it to Custer, his one stipulation was for the Custer Corporation to give Ernie a job, which they did, and Ernie and Joyce took off for good.”
“That’s it?”
“No. After I finally got off the phone with Greta – that woman can talk, let me tell you – I called Custer Hardware and asked for their corporate address. Turns out they have offices in Sacramento, Denver, Little Rock, and – are you ready for this – Fort Lee, New Jersey.”
“Bingo,” Rick said with satisfaction.
Muriel nodded. “Now all I have to do is connect the dots between Custer Hardware, Ernie, Fort Lee, and B.M. Tarpley.”
“I take back every mean thing I ever said about you,” Rick bowed humbly in Muriel’s direction.
“When did you ever talk mean about me?” Muriel looked terribly injured.
“Well, I might not have actually said it.” Rick said in mock seriousness. “Maybe I just thought it.”
“You don’t want to know some of the thoughts I’ve had about you.” Muriel tossed her head. “Anyway, I’m going to go to the newspaper and see about putting this all together.”
“Yeah, but there’s still one thing,” Ed said. “What happened to Daniel that winter?”
Muriel reached for her sandwich. Between bites she said, “Well, after I track down Ernie Jacks, and I will, I suggest you ask him what happened.”
###
Ed did his best to put his impatient curiosity aside during what turned out to be a busy afternoon. The phone was ringing when he walked into the house just before six. “Now what?” He muttered.
“Ed? It’s your mother.”
“Hi, Mom. How are you?”
“Well, I’m just fine. Thank you for asking. Listen, I want you and Rick to come to dinner tomorrow night.”
“Oh. Okay. What about the jelly?”
“Jelly?” Norma scoffed. “Since when do I serve jelly for dinner?”
“No, Mom, I’m talking about the grapes Rex and I picked. Effie Maude made a wonderful pie, and I just assumed you’d use yours to make grape jelly.”
“I should have known,” Norma said in disgust. “The tangled vines on every one of those grapes go back to your greedy stomach. Well, for your information, smarty pants, I did make some jelly. If you go home tomorrow night without a jar it’s your own fault.”
“Thanks, Mom. I appreciate it.”
“That’s better,” Norma said, apparently assuaged. “We’ll see you around six tomorrow, okay?”
“Okay…wait a minute. Did you say we’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Did I say that? Oh, well, I’m inviting your sister and Todd, too.”
“Really.”
“Yes, really. Honestly, I invite my son to dinner and he feels the need to cross examine me? I think you’ve been working too hard this summer, Ed. What happened to taking it easy?”
“It just didn’t work out that way, Mom.”
“Well, when does anything? I’ll see you tomorrow night.”
“Bye, Mom.”
Ed hung up the phone, frowning. He went upstairs where he found Rick stretched out on the bed, recovering from his own busy afternoon.
“We’re going to Mom’s for dinner tomorrow night.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“Laurie and Todd are invited, too.”
“That’s nice.”
“And just when was the last time Mom invited the four of us to dinner? It’s usually just us, or just Laurie, Todd and the kids, unless it’s a holiday.”
Rick sighed.
“Don’t you have anything to say?” Ed demanded.
Rick opened his eyes. “Baby, the last time I commented on your relationship with your mother this summer, I about got my head bitten off. This time I’m refraining from any commentary until after tomorrow night.”
Ed flopped on the bed next to him. “You’re not any fun at all,” he pouted.
“You’re gonna live to regret that statement.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah.”
Rick rolled over and grabbed Ed. He proceeded to both kiss and tickle him until he had Ed laughing and gasping. “I give!”
“You better,” Rick stopped tickling but managed to get in one more kiss. “Now, tell me again I’m not any fun.”
Ed silently grinned at Rick.
“Well?”
“I am refraining from any commentary until you’ve kissed me again.”
“Oh, so that’s it?” Rick looked thoughtful. “Okay!” He hopped off the bed and went to his dresser.
“Hey!”
“Hey what?”
“Where’s my kiss?”
Rick turned around. “Come and get it, smartass.”
Ed rolled across the bed and jumped to his feet. He went to put his arms around Rick, but before he could, Rick grabbed him and pulled him against him. “You want your kiss?”
“Yes, sir.”
Rick chuckled. “That’s not necessary. You may, however, apologize for your crack about me not being any fun by telling me you love me.”
Ed leaned back as much as possible in Rick’s possessive grip. He looked Rick in the eyes and felt the silliness slip away. “I love you,” he whispered.
Rick smiled a shy, almost boyish smile. He kissed Ed gently, and then put his mouth to Ed’s ear. “I love you, baby. And believe me, that’s one thing that hasn’t changed this summer.”
###
Ed and Rick walked over to Norma’s house Tuesday evening. Todd and Laurie – both short and dark-haired and sporting deep tans from their summer at Lake Webster -- were getting out of their car, and the four of them met by the front walk. Laurie and Ed frowned at each other. “Is this about what I think it is?” Laurie whispered.
“I think so,” Ed whispered back. “She almost slipped on the phone last night.”
Rick looked over at Todd. “Do you ever regret marrying into this family?”
“Frequently,” Todd responded, straight-faced. “Do you know what they’re talking about?”
“I think so, but I swore I wouldn’t express an opinion until after the bomb drops.”
Ed and Laurie were about to retort to their respective spouses when Ed spotted another couple walking hand in hand. Matt and Claire were rounding the corner and heading toward them. “The plot thickens,” Ed remarked.
There were now six people standing by Norma’s front walk. “Hail, hail, the gang’s all here,” Claire said uncertainly.
Everyone exchanged significant looks. Rick and Claire, brother and sister, seemed to be asking each other how in the hell they got involved in this. Ed smothered a smile as he took in the puzzled look on Matt’s neatly bearded face. As a Croasdale only, he’d had little contact with the entire Stephens clan. Ed suspected Matt was about to get a crash course in Norma 101.
Norma opened the front door and glared at them. “Look at that bunch of sheep on the sidewalk,” she said. “Do I need to get a dog to round you up and into the house?”
Time for speculation was over. Everyone filed into the house and made themselves comfortable in the living room as Clyde appeared with a tray of iced tea glasses. Ed and Laurie looked at each other and nodded. Rick rolled his eyes at them. Matt and Claire reached for glasses of tea, obviously surprised to see Matt’s father in the role of cohost. Todd, who’d grown used to Norma’s productions over the years, sat back in the recliner in the manner of someone waiting for a show to start.
Well!” Clyde said after he had seated himself next to Norma on the sofa. “I suppose you’re all wondering why we’ve gathered you here tonight.”
“We’re getting an idea,” Laurie said, narrowing her eyes at her mother, who scowled and retorted to her thirty
-three year old daughter, “You just keep a polite tongue in your mouth, young lady.”
“Well, Dad,” said Matt, glancing at Claire. “I’d wager this has something to do with the fact that you have barely unpacked at our house.”
Clyde nodded. “As Rick here knows, the sale on Claudine’s house will be final next month. I’ve had a lot of time to think since she died, and I decided it wasn’t quite right for me to move in on you and your new family. You and Claire have only been married two years, and with Judy off to college you’ll eventually have time alone together when the other two leave the house. You don’t need an old man cramping your style.”
“Clyde, that’s ridiculous,” Claire protested.
He shook his head. “I’ve made up my mind.” He smiled at Norma, who smiled back at him in a way Ed hadn’t seen since his father’s death. “Now, you all know Norma and I have known each other since we were kids on the farm together. Who knows what might have happened if the war hadn’t interrupted everybody’s lives? Norma and I have decided to find out.”
Since no one seemed to know what to say, Rick stepped into the breach. “I think it’s great,” he said warmly. “Congratulations!”
That seemed to loosen a few tongues. Everyone began to murmur and also offer congratulations. Claire beamed and asked, “When’s the big day?”
“What big day?” Norma replied.
“Why…the wedding of course. I’d love to do everything for you that you did with Effie Maude for my wedding.”
Norma shrugged impatiently. “We’ve had enough weddings. Clyde and I are going to live in sin.”
Ed almost choked on his iced tea. Todd rolled his eyes and reached for a dish of salted nuts Norma had placed on the end table. Laurie and Claire looked at each other, wide-eyed and disbelieving. Rick pounded Ed on the back and muttered, “This is even better than I thought it would be.”
“Mother!” Laurie spat out. “I… what am I supposed to tell the kids?”
“You can tell them,” Norma said severely, “their grandmother does not want to end up a bitter, lonely old woman. And, since they’ll probably be spending all of their time at that fancy lake cottage their other grandparents bought –“ She shot a look at Todd, who reached for more nuts – “I’m not going to sit around here waiting for them to visit.”
“Mom’s gonna die when I tell her this,” Todd said with his mouth full.
“Good!” Norma retorted. She and Eunice Ames had been feuding for years, all the way back to Todd and Laurie’s engagement.
Ed recovered from his choking spasm and shook his head at his mother. “Mom, when you said you were going to do what you wanted to do for a change, I had no idea you’d go this far. After all these years of maintaining your reputation as the widow Stephens, are you sure you’re ready for this?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Norma took Clyde’s hand and they exchanged another smile. “Edward, I told you when I began to see the rightness of your marriage to Rick, I began to question things. Our generation was taught not to question things, so once I did it felt like I was doing something wrong, but I realized society isn’t going to go to hell in a handcart if people arrange their lives the way they see fit, instead of doing what a bunch of unhappy snoots will tell them.”
Norma continued in a softer tone. “Ed, Laurie, you know how much I loved your father. I vowed when he died that I’d never look at another man, but as the years have gone by I’ve learned things change in ways you can’t always see ahead to. And as for Porterfield…”
“If they don’t like it, they can lump it,” Clyde adamantly finished her sentence.
Clyde turned to Matt. “Well, son, you’ve been quiet so far. What do you think about all of this?”
Matt still had a look of utter shock on his face, but he managed a head nod in his father’s direction. “You know what I think? I have this picture in my mind of Mom and Norma’s husband high-fiving in heaven. Go for it, Dad.”
That seemed to settle any remaining questions. Everyone stood up and took turns hugging Norma and Clyde. Ed reached out to shake Matt’s hand. “Welcome to the family,” he said with a chuckle. “Such as it is.”
“Thanks,” Matt said with his eyes on Norma and his father. “You’re mom’s uh…”
“I know,” Ed said with a grin. “You’ll get used to it.”
###
Matt, Claire, Laurie, and Todd left shortly after dinner. Ed and Rick lingered, not worried as the others were about unsupervised children at home.
“So, Ed,” Clyde said, settling himself in the recliner. Ed had always thought of it as “Dad’s recliner”, but found he had no problem with Clyde taking ownership. “What’s going on with that young man Rex? He seems to have taken over my job as your flunky with the Fountain house.”
“You weren’t around,” Ed smirked. “Jealous?”
Clyde laughed. “No, not at all. If you ever need my help, all you have to do is ask, but frankly I’m relieved to give up the work to a younger man.”
“Rex has been a revelation this summer,” Rick said. “Ed and I didn’t know what to expect when we took him in, but he’s really a good kid.”
“He’s a hard worker,” Ed added. “He’s determined to build a new life for himself. He could have used his lousy home life and everything that happened to him as an excuse to goof off and get into trouble. I think that’s what Rick and I worried about the most, but I tell you, I couldn’t ask for a better assistant. I’m really optimistic.”
“Well, it’s about time,” Norma snorted.
“Huh?” Ed was puzzled. “What do you mean, Mom?”
“All these years,” she said, slapping her coffee cup onto its saucer with a crash, “I’ve been told to think of those two flea-bitten cats as grandchildren. Now I finally have a real grandson.”
Ed and Rick looked at each other. “Grandson?” They echoed.
“Of course! Why, that boy didn’t stand a chance, growing up with that trashy Scooter Kennedy. Now he’s got two good men who are willing to take him in and give him a real family. You just make sure he knows he has a grandmother over here whenever he wants one.”
“And a grandfather,” Clyde added with a grin. “Maybe I can teach him some of the woodworking things your father taught you, Ed, since my own boys were never much interested.”
“Why, I…” Ed was at a loss for words.
Rick reached for Ed’s hand. “You know what? I think they’re right. Rex has told us both he thinks of us as substitute dads. Why shouldn’t he be a full-fledged member of the family? I mean, look at us: our relationship isn’t conventional, and now your mom and Clyde are following us on the same unconventional path. I think we’ve proven unconventional works just as well as tradition when it comes to making a family.”
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned since I came back to Porterfield,” Clyde said seriously, “it’s that blood doesn’t necessarily make a family.”
“How ‘bout that?” Ed marveled. “Rick and I are…parents!”
“Mr. Stephens,” Rick said solemnly. “I extend my heartiest congratulations. You’re now the father of a one hundred eighty pound, six foot tall, bouncing baby boy.”
###
Ed and Rick discussed the events of the evening while they were getting ready for bed…now that Rick was willing to discuss it.
“I hate to admit it,” Ed said, seated in the easy chair with Arnie in his lap. “You were right; somehow Mom and I changed places over the summer. But who would thought she’d change so much?”
Rick squinted in the mirror as he removed his contacts. “I think you’re mom has been changing ever since I’ve known her. I’d like for us to be able to take some credit for that, but I think it’s just her own personal evolution.”
“I guess you’re right,” Ed said. He petted the cat while he thought about it. “And that business about Rex being her grandson! I would have never seen that coming.”
“Well, why not?” Rick said reason
ably. “If she’s going to be the new champion for unconventional, she might as well go all the way.”
“I know, but…” Ed scowled, trying to find the right words. “It seems kind of…presumptive to think of Rex as our kid. I mean, he’s eighteen. It’s not like he needs a legal guardian.”
“What’s legality got to do with being unconventional?” Rick slipped his glasses on and sighed at his reflection. “Jesus,” he muttered. “Another gray hair. I like the idea of being Rex’s dad. He sure could use one. Or two. Don’t you love him like a son?”
Ed was rather taken aback by that question. He thought back to the Saturday before when he and Rex were in the Camaro together. He had wondered then if part of having kids was an opportunity to relive one’s youth. Remembering the affection he felt for Rex that afternoon, and his pride in Rex’s take down of his former friend, he realized he did indeed love the young man. “I do love him,” Ed admitted.
“So do I.” Rick pulled the covers back on the bed. “I think I started loving him that day his dad barged in here. You know,” he went on thoughtfully, “I always kind of wanted us to have a kid. Not a baby, but someone we could mentor and love as our own. We had that with Neal to some extent, but his parents love him and care about him, and for all intents and purposes, he’s out of the nest. Rex is an entirely different story. He truly needs us.”
“Yeah,” Ed mused, “he’s got a lot of rough edges.”
“Well, we don’t want to sand them down too smooth,” Rick grinned. “Those edges are part of his charm.”
Ed gently placed Arnie in the chair for the night, and crawled into bed next to Rick. “Okay, Dad. What’s next?”
“I want him to quit smoking,” Rick groused. “What about you?”
Ed scooted over and put his head on the shoulder of Rex’s other dad. “Right now I don’t want to change a thing.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
The next morning Ed, Rick, and Rex were at the kitchen table eating breakfast. Ed and Rick were having their favorite “I don’t want to cook” morning meal of peanut butter toast, while Rex shoveled his way through a bowl of cereal.