by Coralee June
I’d admit it, the school was top notch. Every classroom had MacBooks on the desks, and high-tech screens in front of the room where whiteboards would’ve been.
“You looked at my ACT scores?” I asked. Of everything he had said, that little fact was lingering at the front of my mind.
Decker chuckled. I was starting to hate his laughter. Not because it was necessarily an annoying sound. If anything, he sounded downright sexy every time his lips parted and a laugh escaped. I was just tired of him thinking he’d figured me out. Especially since now all I could think about was figuring him out. That truth he’d tossed into my lap like a grenade on Sunday had been haunting me ever since. I had questions burning inside of me, but I refused to give in and ask them. It seemed like he was expecting me to bring it up, and for some reason, with Decker, I preferred to do the unexpected.
“Yeah. I looked at them. I also turned them into our admissions department a week before you got here. They were very impressed.”
I still remember the day I took my ACT. I had to be up at four in the morning to drive Mama to one of her chemo treatments. I dropped her off at the hospital then raced to the school to take my exam. I ended up being thirty minutes late to pick her up, and she sobbed in my lap, telling me how I was selfish and didn’t care about my dying mother.
“I could’ve done better. I was distracted that day,” I said with confidence. I didn’t necessarily want to brag, but for some reason it was important to me that Decker knew I was smart.
Decker stopped in front of the classroom door and proceeded to flip through his large ring of keys before stopping at one and sliding it into the lock. “This is the chemistry lab. Since you’re a merit scholar, I’m assuming this is where you’ll want to spend most of your elective classes. We hire some nearby professors to come in and lead lectures on occasion. We also have partnerships with local labs that have internship programs.”
He opened the door and stepped inside, but I kept my feet firmly planted in the hallway. “Can you please stop talking like this is a done deal?” I asked before taking a step inside. I was so busy staring at him that I didn’t fully take in the room.
“Can you stop pretending like you’re not going to give in?” Decker whispered as I paused right in front of him. My shoulder tapped his chest, and he leaned over before brushing a long, pale strand of hair behind my shoulder. “I think you’d really like it here if you gave it a chance,” he added.
His lips were so close to my ear that a shudder traveled down my spine at his whispered words. I wanted to believe him. I really did. I was a sane, rational person. I could look an opportunity in the face and know if it was good for me. I hated my self-destructive nature in that moment. It reminded me too much of Mama.
Tearing my eyes from the floor, I twisted to stare at him, praying that my eyes didn’t look as heated as my entire body felt.
“Only if you stop pretending like you know me,” I replied, feeling proud of myself for my confident clap back. When his mouth dropped open in shock, I took that as my cue to enter the lab and start looking around.
It was nice. Every bit of technology occupying the lab tables was highly advanced. It looked more like an expensive pharmaceutical lab than a high school chemistry classroom. Every square inch of this room was filled to the brim with the highest quality testing equipment. And even though I was ashamed to admit it, it really was nice. I would’ve never had an opportunity to even look at some of this stuff back in Texas, let alone work with it.
“Holy shit,” I said before running over to a centrifuge to stare at it. I’d never seen one up close! Right next to it was a fume hood and one of the most expensive microscopes on the market. “And students get to use this?” I asked.
“Under supervision, yes,” Decker replied with a smile.
“You don’t play fair, Mr. Harris,” I replied with a sigh while running my hand over the microscope.
“I know I was kind of an ass when you first got here…”
“Kind of?” I scoffed.
“Don’t make me regret this, punk. This is a good opportunity, Blakely. But don’t get confused; I’m doing this for Lance.” Yeah. Sure you are, asshole. There was more between us. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but we were like a chemical reaction boiling over in one of these beakers. I felt hot whenever Decker was near, as well as intrigued by him. Maybe the allure was because he was forbidden, but there was something definitely there.
I took another moment to look around. This really was a phenomenal school. And with the money I’d save by living with Lance, and a potential scholarship, I might actually be able to go to college, maybe even graduate from my undergrad early with a few credits from here. The idea of trusting Lance was starting to sound better and better. So what was holding me back?
“You know I’ve always loved school. It was my first escape from Mama. The only break I got was in the classroom,” I said mostly to myself before spinning around to face him fully. Decker was looking at me with quiet heat, his dark eyes hooded and mouth parted in that sexy way I’d been dreaming about since I met him. What I wouldn’t give to know what he was thinking.
“I know the feeling,” Decker murmured before letting out an uncomfortable cough. “We can cater your electives to fit pre-med if you are genuinely interested in that,” Decker added before biting his lip. “You could also sign up for the kinesiology course, too. We don’t have any teams here, but we partner with another high school and attend their football games as a sports medicine elective. Would look good on a college application. I can take you to the department head right now if you’d like? They started a week ago, but they’d be happy to have you.”
“Wouldn’t I have to be a student to sign up?” I asked, already knowing where this was headed.
“You’ve been signed up since yesterday, Blakely.”
I let out a frustrated exhale, though I wasn’t truly mad, not after seeing how kickass this school was. I was tired of getting in my own way. Excuses and stubbornness were Mama’s forte, not mine.
“The only reason I’m not pissed at you is because this lab has an RB50 Fluorescence Microscope,” I replied with a laugh, and I realized then that it was the first time I’d truly felt excited about the future since before Mama was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer.
“Well let’s go talk to Doctor Lucas. We can get you into the sports medicine club.”
“Okay,” I replied with a wide smile before looking around the room a couple more times. “Thank you,” I whispered, too embarrassed to say it any louder and let him hear that I was thankful for his persistence.
Decker strolled over to me with a humble grin. He didn’t bask in the fact that he was right, which surprised me. Most men Mama brought home liked to brag that they knew what was best for us. They’d tell me what to do and get off on thinking they were smarter than me. But not Decker.
“You’ve been through a lot. You thought you had to do it all on your own because you’ve never had people to lean on,” he whispered. His voice held a tender quality that was both unexpected and invigorating, and oh, how he was right. It was always up to me to keep a roof over our heads and Mama’s treatments in check. I’d been taking care of myself for so long that I didn’t know any better. “But a part of growing up means seeing the bigger picture. Why just survive, when you can thrive?” The moment was too heavy. His body too close. My breathing too shallow. We were in dangerous waters, and I needed to swim my way out.
“Why does that sound like a cheesy marketing slogan?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. We were driving toward serious conversation territory, and I wasn’t ready to part with more of my honesty.
“Because it is one. I like to save my original genius for the classroom.”
We both laughed, and it felt like a weight had been lifted from my chest. Maybe I could take my future by the balls. Maybe I could be more than a waitress or Sharron’s daughter. Maybe one day, I could have a lab coat and my own stethoscope. I jus
t hoped I could handle sitting in Decker’s classroom without drooling.
8
Blakely
My feet were throbbing. It felt like a thousand bees had stung my heel, making each step burn with pain. I was no stranger to hard work. I could keep up with the best of them with a thankful smile on my face. But Friday nights at Huck-a-poos were fucking killer. It didn’t help that my shoes were so worn that I was one rough patch of concrete away from a massive hole. But Lance had been so kind, I didn’t want to ask him for new shoes, especially since he’d just bought me a few summer dresses and my new uniform for school. I figured a few more busy nights like this, and I’d have extra to spare for a good pair of shoes.
Besides, Rose kept slipping bags of clothes in my arms after my shift. The latest collection of clothes had a couple pairs of stilettos. Maybe soon she’d get sensible and add a pair of sneakers to the pile.
“You look exhausted, B!” Monica yelled over the live band while shaking her hips. She was carrying a large tray of drinks and smirking at anyone willing to give her a second look. Rose kept me mostly on food orders and left the bartending to people twenty-one and over, which meant I missed out on drunk tips, but the pay was still good—way better than what I made as a custodian. At this rate, I’d save up more than enough over the next year to get out on my own.
“I’m fine,” I chided, hating that she was bringing attention to how tired I looked. It wasn’t my fault I wasn’t getting much sleep lately. I wasn’t sure if it was anxiety over starting at a new school, the extended hours at Huck-a-poos, or the fact that across the hall, a man that had me confused as hell was sleeping. Off limits. Off limits. Off limits!
“Well, two tall drinks of water just asked to sit in your section. If you’re too tired to finish out your shift, I’d be more than happy to take them off your hands,” she replied in a sickly sweet tone with a chuckle.
Ignoring her, I turned around to search for who she was referencing, then went tense when my eyes landed on Lance and Decker. Rose was leaning over their table and chatting up my brother, a smirk on her face. I stood there frozen for a moment, praying the world would open up and swallow me whole. Rose must have said something funny about me, because they all laughed, chins tipped back in amusement, then turned their gazes in my direction. Fuck.
Rose lifted her hand and waved me over. Aside from a painfully awkward meditation, I’d managed to avoid my eccentric boss for the most part, and it seemed my luck had finally run out.
I cringed as I walked, dodging bussers and patrons with chagrin. Decker looked sinfully good. His hair was a mess, like he’d been running his hands through it all day. Those thick lashes of his framed dark eyes that left sweltering heat up and down my spine. He had dressed casually in a black shirt that hugged the tight muscles in his chest and those broad shoulders. I practically had to tear my eyes away.
“Blakely, dear, how are you today? Your aura is all over the place; is that a hint of sexual prowess I see? Someone got your eye?” Rose said with a kind smile before patting me on the back.
I wanted to run away and hide in the walk-in freezer until my body turned to ice. I could feel the blush rushing up my skin and turning me hot. “A couple of guys by the bar asked for my number. One of them was kind of cute.” I wasn’t necessarily lying. A hot blond did ask me for my number. But the tan line from where his wedding ring used to be was a big turn off.
“What?” Lance asked. I could practically see the invisible forcefield of overprotectiveness washing over him. Fuck. I saw the hint of his bright teeth as they gnawed on his lower lip in irritation.
“It was nothing,” I said with a wave of my hand. The only person I was even remotely interested in right now was completely off limits. Besides, I had more baggage than any man needed. You can’t love others if you don’t love yourself first, and lately I was even struggling to like myself.
“You didn’t tell me Blakely would be wearing that when you offered to hire her,” Decker finally spoke up.
“Are you sexually objectifying one of my employees, Decker? For your next session, I’m taking you to a nudist colony,” Rose said with a tsk, making Lance nearly spit out his beer in laughter.
“N-No. I’m not!” Decker stuttered, and to my enjoyment, his entire body went stiff. “I’m just saying, it’s a little revealing.”
“Are you saying this because you’re concerned for her innocence? Cause Blakely is a grown woman—I bet she’s not even a virgin,” Rose added. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Besides, she’s eighteen. I support safe sexual exploration. It’s natural.”
“Can we stop talking about my baby sister’s sex life please?” Lance choked out. He was still sputtering on his beer and had to wipe his chin.
Rose scowled in response. “I hate double standards. Men get to act like pigs, but the second a woman spreads her legs, she’s a whore. Blakely, I always keep condoms in my desk, and the back room is open if you need them. Just not on the clock, okay? Oh, and the flavored condoms are in the right drawer.”
My mouth dropped open in shock. Did she seriously just say that to me? I didn’t know how to respond. “Thanks, Rose?” I glanced at Decker and noticed that he looked pissed, and I kind of wanted to piss him off more. “And in my experience, the flavored condoms never really taste as good as they claim,” I added just for fun. He turned the brightest shade of red I’d ever seen.
“I know, right? So misleading.”
And then I couldn’t stop. I just wanted to keep going, keep pissing off Decker. “I had an ex that wanted me to put the condom on with my mouth. I didn’t know they put spermicide on the inside, and I ended up choking on the taste. Worst decision ever. I nearly puked on his dick.” Maybe not the best story to share, considering I didn’t want Decker to think of sex with me and puking went hand in hand, but the words fell out of my rambling mouth before I could stop them.
Rose cocked her head back and laughed until tears were streaming down her cheeks. She kept wiping them away while Lance shook his head. Decker, on the other hand, just stared at me. His dark eyes were assessing as they swept up and down my body. “Oh God, Blakely. That’s priceless.” Rose patted my back.
“So, uh, anyways,” I began while shuffling on my feet. “What can I get y’all?” I clicked my pen and tapped it against my notepad, wanting nothing more than to disappear.
“Actually, we came here to pick you up. I have a surprise for you!” Lance said excitedly, all previous disgust gone from his face. I hated how my heart fell.
Most of Lance’s surprises thus far had been in memory of Mama, and I didn’t want another night where I’d have to straddle the line between happiness and reality for his sake. But because I’m a masochist, I plastered a smile on my face and tried to look excited. My false enthusiasm didn’t escape Decker though. I glanced at his scowl and could practically hear his whispered demands for truth.
“Oh?” I asked.
Rose interrupted, giving me more time to perfect my pretend happy face. She was weird but helpful at times. “It’s true. I’m giving you the rest of the night off. Go. Have fun. And your homework is to do something that scares you tonight. All of you,” she said before looking around the table. “I expect a full report in the morning!” And with that, she disappeared down the aisle of busy tables and waitresses, dancing on her feet as she went.
“Something that scares me, huh?” Lance asked as he stared at Rose’s ass disappearing down the restaurant. “I think where we’re going will be perfect for that.”
“A carnival?” I asked, as Lance maneuvered his Land Rover through a crowded parking lot. In the distance, I could see the bright lights illuminating the sky, I could also hear muffled screams inside the car. I was right in thinking that Lance would want to do something in honor of Mama, and even though I didn’t want to think about her, I couldn’t help but feel like she would enjoy this.
Mama always loved a good thrill; she did most anything for the adrenaline rush. There was
something about rickety thrill rides haphazardly put together and taken apart night after night that got her going. Every time she came home from a carnival, it was like the entire world was lifted off her shoulders. I just wished that it was something she and I could have shared together, but Mama didn’t really like being a mother. She didn’t enjoy spending time with me outside of what was obligated.
“Are you excited?” Lance asked while looking at me through the rearview mirror. I was sitting in the backseat and quickly fixed my expression into one of joy. Hopefully, he believed it.
“Oh my gosh,” I began, forcing excitement to bleed through my teeth. “This is awesome! I didn't even know the carnival was in town.”
“It’s the last night. Figured we should celebrate since school starts on Monday. One last hurrah,” Lance answered while parking. He turned off the car and quickly got out of the driver side, but Decker and I lingered for a moment longer. I was reaching for the door handle, trying—and failing—to feel excited about something that should be exciting. Decker’s voice stopped me in my tracks.
“You okay?” he asked. His voice was so low I almost didn’t hear it.
“Yeah,” I choked out, knowing that he could sense the lie in my tone. Decker Harris could read me like a fucking book. I wasn’t sure how he figured me out so quickly, maybe it was the scientist in him, picking apart hypotheses and testing them until they yielded the result he wanted. I wasn’t an experiment; I was a broken soul with half a mind to run.