by J. G. Maltos
Finally, he pulls away but leaves his firm grip on my shoulders. He is in his training gear, a simple attire of loose black cargo jeans and a black fitted long sleeve. The tips of his dark hair stick to his forehead with sweat.
“Just give me a second…” he mumbles from my hair
I pat his back. I can feel the heat radiating off his body as he tries to control his breathing. “I am.”
“Don’t you dare say you are okay. You were passed out for two days,” he threatens, still holding me against him.
“I-I wanted to say I'm feeling better. But, now I feel sweaty,” I comment, hoping to lighten the grim mood.
He tightens his hold. "When Bash said you never showed, I almost lost my head from worry." I can hear his heartbeat loud against my ear. I close my eyes while his breathing lulls my nerves. I hadn't known this feeling of calmness in a long time.
Safe. My eyes brim with tears as the word rolls through my head.
I push myself at arm's length and by the dark circles beneath his eyes, it is clear he hasn’t gotten much rest. His hazel eyes shine red with unshed tears as they roam over my body. My chest tightens under his gaze.
Safe.
"And when I got word you were in the infirmary, I—" His gaze drops to my bandaged wrists. "I shouldn't have left you. I should have stayed and made sure you were safe." His voice breaks.
"You did your duty, Koura," I say as I step away from him and place my sword back on my bed. "You can't blame yourself. I would have been caught either way. They had inside help."
"Inside help?" His face contorts into one of confusion. "Who? How do you know?"
"A kitchen girl I had run into a couple of days ago. She acted strange when I tried to help her with something she dropped, but I didn't think much of it." I sit at the foot of my bed. “I asked the girls about her but they said they don’t know of anyone how I described working in the kitchen. I just assumed she was new.” My shoulders slump at the weight of the situation, the worries too heavy for me to handle at the moment. "It was a strange metal. She must have used it to set off the bombs. I should have known."
Koura paces in front of me, his eyes calculating. "Do you remember what she looked like?"
"She was young," I shrug, "and blonde, my height, slightly taller maybe, around my age or a few years older." A sudden thought sends a shiver down my spine. "She knows this castle inside and out. She could have led them through anywhere. She could be the one who left that note in my room." My stomach churns knowing the enemy could have been so close without me even realizing it. I take a seat at the foot of my bed.
I'm not safe anywhere.
Koura kneels in front of me, forcing my gaze to his. "I'll let the Elite know. We'll interrogate the staff and see if we can get any information on her." He takes my hands in his, and I relax at the familiar heat that radiates off of him. "She's most likely long gone with them, now that you've seen who she is." Koura waits a moment, before finally asking, "How did you manage to escape and make it to the hospital wing? I had gone to see you. Physician Xenio told me you were in pretty rough shape."
I swallow a lump in my throat, thinking back to what happened. "I don't know,” I lie. “ I was slammed against the wall a couple of times. I--" I stop. I can’t explain what I saw, not rationally, at least. I truly have no idea how One Ear ended up lifeless next to me, and black smoke escaping him. I trust Koura, but until I know what I saw, I'd rather keep this to myself. “Was anyone injured?”
Koura nods. “We had a meeting the day after. We lost three soldiers, and nine wounded.”
“I am sorry for your loss, they were like family to you.” I pat his arm.
“It comes with this line of duty. It still doesn’t take away the pain of losing a brother,” he confesses. He takes my silence as the end of our conversation and takes in my still shaken state. "Let's go for a walk and shake this off." He sighs and rises to his feet, pulling my hands up with him. "You could use some fresh air." I try to shake away this feeling that sits in the pit of my stomach. Koura gives me a half-smile, causing my heart to flutter.
I nod and follow after him.
Koura guides me silently out of my chamber, and I see dozens of maids working on the mess in the halls. Piles of shattered vases dot the ground from the explosions. We continue walking as we enter the hallway where I had last seen One Ear alive. Where I had truly believed my life was about to end, until the black smoke that surrounded his face and mouth. His lifeless eyes staring at nothing in straight fear.
What could that be? Who could it be? The paintings that hung beautifully earlier in the week now lean against the walls in broken frames. I need answers.
My gaze stops as I catch sight of Evie, Odette, and Zee at the far end cleaning the mess of the floor. An idea that I have been needing help with causes me to call the girls over. I look at Koura apologetically as we stop a few feet from them.
“Can you call the girls over for me?” I ask him. Koura nods and calls the girls over. I release his arm as they approach. My fingers flex from the loss of warmth Koura provides.
The girls stop what they're doing and beam a smile before walking over to us. Odette is the first to reach me and pull me into a hug, the two girls follow suit.
“Ladies,” Koura greets them.
“Hello again, Koura.” Zee smiles at him. A feeling sparks inside me that I am not familiar with as I see Zemirah glance at Koura. My hand twitches towards his arm but I hold still. What was that?
“Did you need something Princess?” Evie asks, bringing me out of my thoughts.
I smile apologetically at Koura. "Actually, I was needing some help with something, if you don't mind? I needed to look for something in the library."
“Anything." Zemirah lets out a heavy sigh. "Absolutely anything to get out of cleaning."
“Well, I see I am no longer needed.” Koura fakes a wounded heart.
I shake my head. “I just want to do some research on the kingdoms. I do not feel like I am prepared to face the Elites. Plus, it’s the library. I vaguely remember you loathing that place when we were growing up.”
“I still do,” he chuckles. “Fine. Have fun ladies,” he bows, giving me a wink before excusing himself.
Once Koura is out of hearing distance, I look at the girls. "I need to find records of the Shadow Kingdom." I was hoping to keep my explanation vague, but it only sparked the curiosity of the three girls.
"Why the sudden interest in the Forgotten Kingdom?" Evie asks.
Half-truths seem to be my forte at this point. If I can't tell Koura the whole truth yet, better keep it from the girls as well. "Elite Florence talked about it when they had me meet with everyone. It made me realize I am not as well-versed in our history as a princess of a kingdom should be."
Zemirah accepts this and raises a fist into the air. "The knowledge of paper and pen are the roots of critical thinking as the branches and leaves create a forest of knowledge.”
“That was lovely? Who said it?” I ask.
Zee turns with a roll of her eyes “Me? I just said it,”She laughs.
I shake my head at her silliness. I let the girls lead the way to the Library, which seems like an endless trip with all the twists and turns of the hall. When we reach our destination, I stare in awe at the sheer size of it all. Rows and rows of books line the wall of this labyrinth. I walk toward the middle of the room and look up, surprised that there is another floor of books.
"Don't just stand there, Princess." Zemirah teases from behind a row of books. "Search to your heart's content."
I shake my head and continue walking toward the far end of the room. My fingers graze the worn-out spine of the books. I believe I have reached the end of the bookshelf when I turn the corner and I see another bookshelf. I look around to see if any of the girls are near but their footsteps sound from on top of me.
I walk toward the back of the large room. Old and fragile books decorate the walls as I continue to walk. My face moves inches toward
the spines of the books, desperate not to miss a single title, but the books are so old, they're either hard to read or use some unfamiliar symbols that have been dropped from our alphabet centuries ago.
"Of course it couldn't have been that simple." I sigh after going through a row of undecipherable titles. "No 'Shadow Kingdom History.'"
Something moves from the corner of my eye and the familiar chill sweeps up my spine. I swirl around, feet planted on the ground and palms placed out in front of me, but I see nothing, just an empty row of books. I inch toward the other end of the row, peering through the books for whatever it could have been.
"Zemirah?" I call out. "Evie?" When I get no response, I head back to my original spot. I am frozen still as I see the silhouette of a black figure standing on the other side of the shelves. The figure is tall and made of smoke.
I scratch the inside of my palms, causing me to wince. I am awake. What is this? Is this a shadow Elite Florence spoke about? The figure does not move as I take a step sideways. I continue walking towards the end of the bookshelf, my eyes never wavering. I take a slow step and tilt my head across the wooden board of the shelf but the figure is gone.
My heart pounds against my ribs as I try to control my breathing. I feel something else and flinch back when I hear a loud smack echo through the room. I scream and shut my eyes, waiting for the next sound of collapsing books.
"Princess?" Evie's voice rings out from the far side of the Library. "Are you okay? We heard you scream!" Sounds of multiple sets of boots get closer and in seconds the girls are standing in front of me.
"I'm fine." My hand grips at my chest, as if it'll hold my heart back from jumping out. "I thought I saw something, that's all."
Zemirah's eyes glisten with excitement and she searches the ground. "Was it a mouse? I love mice!"
"Oh, god no." Evie shudders and hops on her feet. "Did you really see a mouse? I hate rats!"
“A mouse and a rat are not the same sizes, Evie.” Zee laughs.
“Mouse and rat are the same things! They both eat cheese and are both gross!” Evie glares at an amused Zee.
Odette walks over and crouches in front of me, when she comes back up, she's holding an old torn-up book in her small hands. She points to it with a questioning glance and hands it to me.
Evie peers over at Odette, and still cringing from my lie, translates. "You found the book you needed?"
I glance between them before looking at the leatherbound book in my hands. My fingers run across the thick leather vines that decorate its cover.
Studies of Kingdoms and Abilities
Divine, Elites, and High King and Queen
Vol I.
I nod toward her, trying my best to hide the wave of panic that entered me. "It's a good start," I say, and pull the girls with me towards the entrance door. "Let's get out of here before another rat jumps out."
Evie grabs Odette's hand and rushes through. "You don't have to tell me twice." I take one last look behind me as Odette pulls me forward. The black figure appears behind the shelf I had been standing just moments before. I catch his arm and move forward just as the large library doors slam shut behind me.
We spend what feels like hours in my Chamber. The book is so thick and heavy with information, we have to take turns reading, to not overwhelm our brains with Old language jargon. Even then, it's going to take weeks before we can make any sort of dent in the book. My feet dangle from my bed as I try and process what little information we are able to make out.
The gods blessed the people with elemental powers to help guide them through the world. Each Kingdom was designated a single element to maintain a balance of power. That balance was maintained for centuries, but in the shadows grew the lust for greater power.
The Shadow Kingdom became greedy and the kingdoms saw only one solution to the problem. They held a rebellion and the Earth Kingdom was in charge of destroying the Shadow crystal. The Shadow Kingdom was overly confident, so they never saw their fall coming.
"That's why my family was overly cautious," I whisper to myself, forgetting the girls lay asleep several feet away from me. "They couldn't afford any mistakes after our history." I think back to the lessons my mother held with me, of maintaining balance within my ability and never abuse it. It never really made much sense to me then.
One thing still hangs in my mind. With the Shadow crystal destroyed, what truly became of the Shadow people? Could they have survived without their crystal, or did we doom them to their death the moment the crystal cracked? The book is old and we found missing or torn pages. The girl's and I can only form a muddy picture of our history.
"I have to go back to the Library." I sit up from my bed, careful not to wake the girls with my sudden movements. "There has to be something I'm missing."
I turn to the girls and see Zemirah snoring peacefully in an awkward position. She's gonna be so sore in the morning. My room is eerily quiet. The moon shines bright in the sky, giving my room some light. Elite Florence thinks those from the Shadow Kingdom walk among us. I turn to look at the girls on my bed. Evie and Odette huddle close to each other, their breathing following each other in a soft rhythm, and a smile dances at the tip of my mouth. I could get used to this.
My mind races back to the library and the shadow. It wanted me to find the book. It knew what I was searching for and forced the book out of the shelf. Why is it helping me? I bite my nails as the memory of the shadow plays over in my head. The library is where it showed, maybe it will show up again?
My legs slide off the edge of the bed, and as I turn toward my chamber door, I freeze. A silhouette stands at the darkest corner of my room by the window. My breath quickens, and I force my eyes to remain on the figure. I lift a shaky hand, hoping for it to follow my movements, but it remains still. With a gasp, my hand grips the silky sheets of my bed.
It’s here. This is real. My mind races. I'm awake. This is real.
I take a hesitant step toward the figure and notice with a sharp pang of fear that it tilts its head at me as if assessing my next move. My stare never wavers because I know the moment I look away, it'll disappear and I'll feel crazy once again.
This is a bad idea, I scold myself.
My feet keep moving despite my better judgment. I hear my harsh breathing as I walk. I never imagined I would be facing a live shadow again and in my room. It has no face but I feel him watching me. The weight of his stare holds familiarity, though I cannot remember from where.
The figure towers over me now, but all I can make out is its broad shoulders. His face remains obscured to me through the darkness.
"Hello," I whisper, waiting for some sort of reaction. The figure remains still, so I try again. "I'm Althea." I raise my head, “ I mean, Princess Althea from the Kingdom of Earth.”
Finally, a silky voice escapes the silhouette and I nearly jump out of my skin. "Hello, Princess." Its head bows to me and something flutters in my stomach.
"Do I know you?" My eyebrows come together, waiting for another response.
"You do not, Princess. But it is a pleasure to be in your presence." His voice slides around the room, a chill is sent up my spine.
"Pleasure is mine." I inch toward him again, trying to get a better look. "If I may ask, what exactly are you?" I feel the figure stare back at me for what feels like ages. My heart beats so loud in my ears, I doubt I could make out any other noise in the room.
He moves from within the corner and out into the moonlight that shines past the window and toward me. My palms go to drown the gasp that threatened to escape my lips. The light shines clearly, but he remains to be a faceless figure against the beams.
Without a second thought, my hands reach for him. He doesn't move away. Instead, he waits for my anticipating hands. The tips of my fingers graze past the moonlight toward his body, but I only meet air. My hands fall limp beside me.
"A Shadow," I whisper.
The figure nods. "Yes, Princess. I am a Shadow."
"But h
ow—" My voice shoots out, and I hear the girls twist at the sound. I can't have them see this, not yet. I lower my voice. "We need to talk somewhere else. Could I still see you in the library? In the lights—?"
A heavy chuckle leaves him. "Yes, Princess. Please, lead the way. I shall follow."
I nod. Still in my own mind, I force myself toward the chamber door and carefully step out without waking the girls.
There's a freaking Shadow, I yell at myself as I race down the halls. It shouldn't be real. It can't be real.
I hurry down to the library, my bare feet padding against the cold marble floors that assure me I am still wide awake. My hands pull at the two heavy doors and I cringe against the creak the doors make. Once inside, I lean my head against the doors and force my breathing to steady itself.
Moment of truth. With a heavy breath, I lift my head from the door, summon all the courage I could muster, and turn around.
There he is, a black smoke standing in front of me just as he had in my room. He says nothing, and as moments pass I feel the gravity of the situation pull at my heart. In a rushed craze, I scurry to tug at the lamp lights that sit on the wooden tables. The room is enveloped in blotches of yellow hazes, and much to my neverending disbelief, the shadow remains unfazed.
"I'm sorry." A shaky hand runs through my hair and I try to keep as much distance between him and me as possible. "I've never seen a shadow before. At least not one that talks back, I mean."
"It is to be expected." His voice bounces out into the walls like a cool breeze and my rapidly beating heart calms, but only slightly.
I rake my mind through endless questions, debating which ones are the most appropriate and most important but my emotions are overwhelmingly murky. I can't make sense of anything. Finally, I can only think of one simple question. "What is your name?"
The shadow doesn't answer right away, and I convince myself in that short amount of time that he may not even have one. The top of the shapeless figure shifts as if he was turning his head, pensive—or ashamed.