long, but it couldn't be helped, could it? How are things
going?'
'Well, Mrs Taswell's been poorly, dear, and that put us in
a bit of a fix, but Deirdre brought her cousin along to fill the
gap - no experience, of course, but a good-hearted little thing
and much better than no one. And that nice Mr Steinberg
from Philadelphia called - he was so sorry to miss you - I
told him you'd be back soon and he wants you to telephone
him. It's about the Dr Wall punchbowl he asked you to find
for him.'
'- So that's the news from this end, Flick. You'll bring Angela
up for the wedding, won't you? I don't think she's too little
to be a bridesmaid, do you? I mean, she's getting on for
five, she'll look so pretty -'
'Yes, of course we will, Alan. Tell me, how's Mummy
taken it? Is she pleased?'
'Yes, she says she's delighted. I must say, she did rather
put me through the hoop about Kathe - you know, who were
her parents, where did she live and all that -'
'Well, Alan, those are rather the sort of things mothers
want to know, don't you think?'
'Well, yes, I suppose so, but after all they don't really
matter -'
'Not to you, no; that's perfectly understandable. You're in
love with her. But Mum's not in love with her, so she's got
a different approach and she's entitled to ask questions.'
'Yes, of course. But hardly to sort of check her out -'
'Yes, Alan, yes! Just that. The role of the protagonists and
the r61e of the family are two completely different things.
Bear with me while I develop this brilliant concept for your
good, my lad. When two people fall in love, that's personal
to them and no business of anybody else. Parents and relatives
aren't entitled to say "I wouldn't fall in love with
117
that person". They aren't even entitled to say "I don't particularly
like that person. I can't see anything special about
her." They're not required to. But, Alan, they are entitled
to be satisfied that the person is of good character and good
family - not a nutter - never been in any sort of trouble or
disgrace and so on - and who the family are. In fact, I'd
say that in that respect they'd almost got a responsibility.
Apart from anything else - their affection for their own protagonist
and all that - they're often being called upon to
receive a total stranger into their family. Mum's not pushing
you around at all; she's simply fulfilling her proper function.
She'd just like to know a bit more about Kathe's background;
come to that, so would I. But that doesn't mean we aren't
going to like her or wish you both all the happiness in the
world.'
'Well, when you put it like that, Flick, I must say it
sounds reasonable; and I'm sure everything will be made
crystal-clear at the first opportunity. But you do realize that
this isn't quite the same as happening to come upon the girl
you want to marry in Newbury, or even in England? I mean,
what with her being in Copenhagen and my not being able
to stay there indefinitely, we couldn't really get down to
minor details. There'll be plenty of time later to fill in Mum's
questionnaire.'
'D'you happen to know why Kathe's coming over here to
get married?"
'No, not really, but it suits us all very well, doesn't it?
Much less trouble and expense.'
'Have you mentioned it to the Rev. Tony yet? (Wait a
minute, Angela darling! Mummy's talking to Uncle Alan.)'
'I'm popping round there for an ecclesiastical noggin on
Saturday evening. But I've told him already on the 'phone
and he says he'll be delighted to do his stuff.'
'He is a nice chap! I've often missed him and thought
how lucky you are still to have him. Well, I'm very happy
about it all, Alan, and I'm greatly looking forward to meeting
Kathe. Now you'll have to say good-night to Angela,
otherwise there'll be no peace. Come on, Angela, here's
Uncle Alan.'
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'Hullo, Angela. How's blue Teddy? Oh, dropped him in
the bath, did you? Did he sink? Oh, he walked all the way
out along the bottom? That was clever-'
' 'Morning, Deirdre. I'm told you had a few little problems
while I was away, and you coped with them marvellously.
But then I might have known you would.'
'Well, just a few, Mistralan. Nothin' what I couldn't 'andle,
like.'
'Well, I think you deserve a little extra, and it'll be in your
envelope this evening. I'm very grateful.'
'Oh, that's nice of you, Mistralan. Not that I really done
anythin' special.'
'Well, for a start, I think it was very bright of you to think
of getting your cousin Gladys to come and give us a hand
while Mrs Taswell was away. And I suppose you had to
teach her everything. How did she pick it up?'
'Cor, Mistralan, wants 'itt'n on the 'ead 'eavy 'ammer. I
bin on at 'er 'alf hour at a time.'
'Well, there you are. You did a lot extra.'
'That right you're gett'n married, then, Mistralan?'
'It is indeed, Deirdre. Quite soon, too. I'm looking forward
to seeing you and Gladys at the wedding.'
'Mrs Desland was sayin' as your intended's comin' over
'ere.'
'Yes, from Copenhagen. She's very anxious to see the shop
and meet you all.'
'That right she's German?'
'Yes, she is.'
'My dad don't like the Germans. 'E don't 'alf get on about
it sometimes.'
'Well, the war's been over a long time now. I'm sure he'd
like this lady if he met her, and I hope he will.'
'Bit sudden, wasn't it, Mistralan? Kind of a quick decision,
like?'
'You wait, Deirdre. You'll know all right when it hits you.
But look, why don't you just take me round now and tell me
what's been happening, and anything you think needs seeing
119
to? You say we sold the blue-and-white tureen to Mrs
Baxendale? -'
'Personal call for Mr Alan Desland.'
'Fine, carry on.'
'Is that Mr Alan Desland speaking?'
'Yes, it is.'
'Fraulein Geutner is calling you from Copenhagen and
wishes you to pay for the call.'
'Yes, certainly. Put her through, please.'
'Alan?'
'Kathe! Oh, Kathe, how are you, darling? Is everything
all right?'
'Yes; dock, }a How should it not be? For the rest of life
everything is just fine. Alan, dearest, how is your mother?
What did she say when you told her?'
'Well, I think she was a bit startled to begin with, naturally,
but she's awfully pleased about it and simply longing
to meet you.'
'And all the china ladies and gentlemen?'
'They say you're the porcelain of humankind.'
'What?'
'A dainty rogue in porcelain. It's all right, I'm only talking
nonsense because I'm so happy. The business is fine, darling,
and everything's just as it should be, except that you're
>
in K0benhavn and I'm in England.'
Til see you very quickly now, Alan, and we can be married
as soon as you're able to arrange it.'
'How splendid! When do you want me to come over for
you?'
'You need not. I will arrive at Heathrow on Monday evening.'
'What - you mean this Monday evening? Three days from
now?'
'Yes. It's Flight BA 639 and it arrives at quarter past ten.'
'Good Lord! You mean you've settled everything and
you're ready to leave? That seems terribly quick!'
'You're not pleased?'
120
'Yes, of course I am: but you've taken my breath away! I
never dreamt you could be ready so soon. Have you said
good-bye to Mr Hansen?'
'Yes, and to the Always 'bus.'
'And Inge and her little girl?'
'Yes, yes. Then you'll meet me, Lieber, on Monday evening?'
'Of course I will; and I'll have somewhere for us to stay
in London that night, as it's such a late arrival. Tell me,
what did Hansen say when you told him we were getting
married?'
'Oh, I didn't tell him. Only that I was leaving.'
'Oh, didn't you? Why not?'
'Well, there's no need to be telling everything to everybody,
is there? Alan, what about your sister -'
We chatted on for several minutes, for I could not bear
to bring the call to an end. When at length I had rung off,
I remained sitting beside the telephone in a confusion of
joy, surprise and excitement. Clearly, Kathe must be as eager
and impatient to be with me as I with her. Indeed, it was
evident that she could hardly wait to join me, could scarcely
bide the time until we should be married. To anyone else any
third party - this would no doubt seem natural enough.
Girls who are going to be married not uncommonly feel like
this. Yet to me it still seemed unbelievable; I was superstitiously
afraid to credit that she could possibly love and long
for me as I for her. Tears filled my eyes and after a few
moments, seeking an outlet for my passionate sense of gratitude
and happiness, I began murmuring, half aloud, the
words of the general thanksgiving.
'-give thee most humble and hearty thanks for all thy
goodness and loving-kindness to us and to all men. We
bless thee for our creation, preservation and all the blessings
of this life; but above all, for thine inestimable love -'
My mother, happening to come through the hall, not unnaturally
asked what I thought I was doing; and at this I
jumped up, laughing at the absurdity of my happiness, at her
concern and the whole state of things in general, and told
her the news.
121
'My goodness!' she said. 'You mean she's coming straight
over - she's not going back again before the wedding?'
'That's it!'
'Well, she has got things settled up quickly! Were you
expecting her as soon as this?'
'No! No! No! No! I was expecting to have to go over
and bring her back!'
'Well, she obviously knows a trick worth two of that,
doesn't she? And of course you're delighted, darling?'
'I can hardly believe I'm going to see her again on Monday
evening! It seems too good to be true. Will you come
up to Heathrow with me and meet her off the 'plane?'
'Well, it's a nice idea, but - no, I think not, dear; even
though I'm very much looking forward to meeting her. It'll
be much better for you to be there alone when she arrives.
I mean, just put yourself in her place. You'll be doing a lot
of that in future, so you might as well start getting in some
practice. She'll have had all the business of leaving her job
and clearing up and getting packed and so on, and then she'll
arrive quite late at night and probably tired out, in a strange
country, not feeling or looking her best. That's hardly how
you'd want to meet your future mother-in-law for the first
time, is it?'
'Well, I see what you mean, Mummy. All right, I'll go by
myself.'
'Have you thought about arrangements, Alan? I mean,
where she's going to stay and so on?'
'Well, I think it'll be best if we stay in a hotel in London
on Monday night, don't you? And Tuesday, too, perhaps.
Then if she needs to get anything we can go shopping and
so on, and I'll bring her down to meet you here on Wednesday
- or even Thursday. There's no wild hurry, is there, as
long as you can cope with the shop for just another day or
two?'
'Splendid, dear; but I really meant, where is she going to
stay until the wedding? I mean, she can't very well stay
here, can she? It would look a little odd. She'll need to stay
somewhere else.'
'I hadn't thought of that, Mummy, but of course you're
122
perfectly right. Let me think; and I'll go and fix us both a
gin-and-tonic while I'm thinking.'
When I came back with the drinks I said, 'I've got it! The
simplicity of genius! I'll ask the Redwoods if they can have
her. I know Tony's as shamefully hard up as all the clergy,
but I know him and Freda so well that I'm sure I can persuade
them into some suitable sort of P.G. arrangement. I
think they'd love it, actually, and no one can possibly raise
an eyebrow at that; I mean, if she's staying with the clergyman
who's going to marry us. I'll put it to Freda and Tony
when I see them tomorrow evening. What d'you think?'
'I think that will do very well, dear, as long as they've got
a room and can manage it and it's no bother to Freda. A
girl's less trouble than a man, as a rule. And I suppose you'll
put up the banns next Sunday, will you?'
'You bet I will! And that means we can be married in less
than four weeks from now. Hands to dance and skylark!'
'Well, it will be nice. But the invitations, Alan - all the
arrangements! It's terribly short notice, isn't it? I feel quite
- quite, well, put on the spot, I suppose you'd say: but I'm
certainly not complaining. I wonder whether Flick might be
able to come up a day or two early and lend me a hand? I'll
ring her later on this evening. But let's just talk about it all
for a bit first, shall we, and see what needs to be done? Get
that pad thing out of the bureau, dear, so that we can make
a list.'
We talked about it for three quarters of an hour. At length
my mother said, 'Well, if General Montgomery could have
done any better than that, I'd have liked to see him try. I
feel much more settled. I'm going to enjoy it enormously.
Now let's ring dear Flick and see whether she can think of
anything we've forgotten."
123
12
As it happened, Kathe's was not the only long-distance call
I received that evening.
Little pleasure as I have ever been able to take in modern
technology - despite being, like everyone else, an involuntary
beneficiary - I have always felt grateful for the longdistance
telephone, a
nd have often wondered what Socrates
or Leonardo would have thought of a device which can single
out a chosen individual thousands of miles away. ('Socrates?
Alkibiades here. Look, I'm up at Bisanthe...') In fact, I
once made up a clerihew about it.
Prospero
Had nothing on the G.P.O.,
Which can link maidens and youths
From here to the still-vexed Bermoothes.
But this by the way - except to explain why, after all the
activity of the evening, I was not in the least put out when
at eleven o'clock the telephone rang once more and brought
forth the voice of Mr Morgan Steinberg of Philadelphia.
I liked Mr Steinberg. Like most English people, I tend to
be a shade troubled by Americans en masse, together with all
gear, tackle and trim of so-called American culture; but
nevertheless like and respect several individual Americans.
Mr Steinberg was a man after my own heart. He, like myself,
lived largely for ceramics but was humbly convinced that
he knew little about them. As a matter of fact he knew a
good deal more than I, except about English pottery and
porcelain, since he was wealthy and widely-travelled and,
being now in his sixties, had been at it a long time. I liked
him principally because he quite sincerely saw himself less as
the possessor than the custodian - for the time being - of the
items in his collection. He was an excellent customer, nearly
always eager to spend, and I had cultivated him assiduously.
His way was first to discuss with me whatever he had in mind
to acquire and then ask me to find and buy it for him, more
124
or less regardless of cost; and during the early years of our
acquaintance (which were also those when I had been struggling
to establish myself as a reasonably well-known dealer)
I had more than once charged him high, though not exorbitant,
prices. However, as my liking for him had grown,
together with my respect for his rather touching scholarly
humility, I had not only desisted from this but had once or
twice asked him very little more for a piece than it had cost
me.
Mr Steinberg had often invited me to go over and stay.
From pressure of work I had always been obliged to refuse,
but there was a kind of understanding between us that one
day I would find myself able to 'visit with' him in Philadelphia.
Although he knew a great deal which I did not about
oriental ceramics, for instance - he seldom or never
paraded this knowledge: indeed, I often found myself wishing
that he could be stimulated to become a little more
forthcoming and less self-depreciating, since although he
had seen a great many collections all over the world, it was
a hard matter to pick his brains. Nevertheless, there was a
forcefulness - a 'go-getter' quality - about him in the pursuit
of any plan or idea which he had formed. In hospitality
he was generous to the point of embarrassment, having, indeed,
a kind of baffling unstoppability when it came to paying
restaurant bills; and the only way in which I had ever
been able to hold my own in this respect was by inviting him
to Bull Banks, where he had dined several times and once or
twice spent the night.
Mr Steinberg had been collecting Dr Wall porcelain for
several years and had now acquired what I felt sure must
be a very fair collection indeed, judging by those pieces
which he had bought from me. For some time past he had
been on the look-out for a yellow-ground punchbowl, and
it had given me satisfaction, just before my recent trip to
Copenhagen, to find one (from the workshop of James Giles,
its reserves decorated with cut fruit) and to buy it at auction.
Since I knew he would pay whatever it cost, I had simply
gone prepared to continue bidding until I got it; but, as not
infrequently happens, this very preparedness had in some
125
odd way stifled the opposition, and I had not in fact had to
pay more than a fair price. My letter to Mr Steinberg, giving
details of the transaction, had been one of those which
I had dictated to Kathe at Mr Hansen's.
'Alan?' said Mr Steinberg warmly, across the intervening
four thousand miles. 'How're you doing? Good to hear you!
You got back all right from Copenhagen?'
For the next three minutes of his long-distance call I
assured Mr Steinberg, in reply to his enquiries, that I had
survived the return journey from Denmark, that my health
was good, that my mother's health was good, that my business
was thriving and the weather was fine.
'I was really glad to get your letter to-day,' said Mr Steinberg
The Girl in a Swing Page 14