by Lisa Jordan
Barely, but they’d made it through. Maybe this would work out after all. It had to. Tucker and her dad—whether he wanted to admit it or not—were counting on her. She couldn’t afford to let either of them down.
* * *
Tucker didn’t like the dark shadows bruising Bella’s eyes, and he felt to blame.
But he’d been around women long enough to know commenting on their less-than-stellar appearance meant bad news for him. And he enjoyed staying out of the doghouse.
But, man, Bella looked like she was ready to drop even after sleeping all night. Well, that was, if she had slept after he stopped by to check on her.
And now as he stood in the doorway of the kitchen, an appreciation he couldn’t even put into words rose up within him. In just a matter of days, she’d made a huge difference with his family. Livie and Landon talked about her constantly, asking for her to come back even when he wasn’t working. He took that as a win.
Flour dusted the countertop near the stove, and bowls and spoons filled the sink. At the dining room table, Olivia and Landon chattered around bites of syrup-drenched speckled pancakes. Bella listened as she clutched a steaming cup of coffee.
“Hey, did you save any pancakes for me?”
Bella jumped, then gave him a weary smile. She wore gray yoga pants, a long-sleeved pink T-shirt and had her hair twisted in some sort of messy bun. And she couldn’t have looked cuter.
Forks clattered against their plates as the twins scrambled off their chairs and hurled themselves at him, “Daddy! Guess what? Izzie let us make pancakes.”
Izzie?
Olivia flung out her arms. “Real ones. Not the box kind.”
“Or the frozen toaster ones.”
Tucker laughed and wrapped an arm around each of them. “Bella is pretty talented, isn’t she?”
She rose from the table, refilled her cup, then poured coffee into a John Deere mug and handed it to him.
“Bless you, woman.” He released his kids and reached for the cup, taking a sip. “Oh man, I could get used to this.”
She peered at him over the rim of her mug. “Someone to serve you coffee?”
He waved a hand at the messy kitchen and laughing children. “This. All of it. A great-smelling kitchen. Happy, smiling kids.” He raised his eyebrow. “And yes, a beautiful woman serving me coffee.”
She lowered her eyes, but pink stole across her cheeks. She looked at him over the rim. “But this is only temporary, right?”
Her words echoed inside his head.
Yes, their agreement was only temporary, but the more he was around Bella, the more he wanted to make it permanent.
And that was just crazy. He couldn’t fall in love with her.
Not when she’d been back in his life for such a short amount of time.
Bella set her mug on the counter and opened the fridge. She pulled out the kids’ lunch boxes and set them on the table next to their now-empty plates. “You two need to rinse your plates, put them in the dishwasher, then get your teeth brushed. The bus will be here shortly.”
“Okay, Izzie.” Livie and Landon scooted off their chairs and carried their plastic Disney character plates and matching cups to the sink where Isabella stood and turned on the water.
To Tucker’s amazement, they did as she’d said and placed them in the dishwasher. Bella wet a clean dishrag and handed it to Landon. “Hey, buddy. How about cleaning the syrup off the table?”
Landon snatched the cloth and did as instructed, then tossed it from the table into the sink. When it landed where he wanted, he shot both arms in the air. Then he turned and raced Livie to the bathroom.
Tucker leaned his back against the counter. “Woman, you promise them the world or something? Or worse, a puppy?”
She looked up from where she’d been wiping flour off the counter. “What? No, of course not. They didn’t want to get out of bed, so I told them if they got up and got dressed like they were supposed to, then we could make very special pancakes for breakfast. And I added that they had to take care of their dishes when they were done.”
He ran a hand over his tired face. “Well, it worked. You’re good for them, Izzie.”
She wrinkled her nose and wagged her finger. “No way, pal. Only the cutest twins on the planet get to call me that.”
Livie and Landon ran from the bathroom, toothpaste caught in the corners of their mouths, shoved their lunch boxes in their backpacks hanging on low hooks in the laundry room, then Livie turned to Isabella. “Izzie, will you walk us to the bus today?”
Tucker pressed a hand to his chest and staggered back. “My heart. It’s broken. My daughter has replaced me.”
“Oh Daddy. You’re silly. No one could replace you. I just want Izzie today.”
He crouched in front of her. “And that’s okay with me as long as she doesn’t mind. Have a great day. Make good choices. And remember what?”
“You love me to the moon and back.” She flung her arms around his neck.
“That’s right.” He gave her a hug and pressed a kiss to her fruit-scented hair. Then he turned to Landon, wrapping him in a hug. “Hey, my man. Same goes for you—have a great day and make good choices.”
“I will, Dad. Love you.”
“Love you, too, buddy.”
As Bella headed out the door and through the garage with his kids, he watched from the kitchen window as the three of them stood together at the end of the driveway.
Like a family.
His children needed a woman’s presence in their lives. Someone to make them special pancakes, guide them in cleaning up their messes and walk them to the bus.
Someone like Bella.
Stop that.
He could not let his heart sway his head.
As soon as Livie and Landon hurried onto the bus, Bella waited for it to head down the hill, then she turned and headed back to the house, her arms wrapped around herself.
She breezed in through the laundry room with the chill of the morning clinging to her. The rose-colored tip of her nose made him want to lean down and kiss it. Instead, he refilled his cup. “Thanks again for coming to our rescue last night. With Dad and Claudia out of town, I appreciated it even more.”
“No problem. I’ll finish cleaning up the breakfast mess and get out of your hair.” She brushed past him and finished wiping off the counters. “There are leftover crepes. You can store them in the fridge and warm them in the microwave—cover them with a plate so the steam will heat them without drying them out.”
He laid a hand on her arm. “You’ve done plenty. Leave the mess. I’ll take care of it.”
“No, you need sleep. I’ll be done in just a few minutes, then you can have the place all to yourself—peace and quiet.”
Problem was, he didn’t want peace.
These days, he disliked the quiet.
“You learn to make crepes in culinary school?”
Bella shook her head, her hand stilling a moment. “No. My mother taught me. When I was about the twins’ age, actually.”
“Your mother? You don’t talk about her.”
She lifted a shoulder. “There’s not a lot to tell. Dad and I weren’t enough to make her stay. She went back to France when I was five, and I haven’t heard from her since.”
“France? Man, Bella. I’ve known you most of my life and I never knew your mother was from France. Is that why you enjoy French cooking so much?”
“I don’t know. I guess part of me figured if I could excel at cooking and opened a cute little French bistro, make a name for myself, then my mother would find me worthy enough to have in her life. But apparently she has loftier goals than parenthood.”
“What do you mean?”
“Have you heard of Solange Boucher?”
“Of course. Who hasn’t? She’s like the next Julia Child, or
at least that’s what someone mentioned when I caught one of her shows on the cooking channel.”
“She’s my mother.” Spoken quietly, her words were edged with wistfulness and perhaps sadness.
Tucker’s eyes widened. “What? Solange Boucher is your mother?”
Bella nodded, her eyes downcast as she scrubbed the same spot on the counter. “My dad met her when he was in the navy. His ship, a subtender that’s since been decommissioned, had gone to the Bahamas for some offshore training exercises. My mother was there on holiday with her family. She and my dad met at a French patisserie, and he said it was love at first sight—for him, anyway. They wrote back and forth, and when he left the navy, he went to France and asked her to marry him. She accepted, and they had a small wedding in a park outside Paris. They both loved cooking and talked about opening a restaurant together. Dad said moving to the States and giving up everything she’d known was tough on her. I was born just after their first anniversary. When I was five, her father became very ill. She went back to France to see him and never returned. Apparently, it was more important for her to make a name for herself over there than to be here with her family in the States.”
“I’m sorry, Bella.” He touched her hand.
She shrugged. “It is what is it. My dad was devastated when she refused to come back. I had no contact with her after that. I don’t know if that was her choice or his. All I know about my mother is what’s shown in the media. I used to make her cards every Mother’s Day, holding on to hope that one day she’d walk back through our door. But she never did.”
“I can only imagine how painful that has been for you. I’ve always had family around, so it’s hard to know what that would be like. It’s been five years since Mom was killed, and there are times when I still want to call out for her when I walk into the farmhouse.”
“How do we get over that? You’re grieving for those you loved and lost, and I’m grieving for a woman whose life choices were more important than parenthood.”
“Grief takes on many different forms, and it’s not something you just get over. It takes time, and the process is different for everyone. You need to allow yourself to process it and learn how to move through it, but part of you will always cherish the time you had with the person you lost.”
“Even after twenty-five years, I’m not so sure I’ve moved through it. Almost everything I do is based on her and hoping to be enough for her to want me back in her life. How pathetic is that—a grown woman still trying to make her mommy proud?” Bella sniffed and brushed a hand under her eyes.
“Bella. It’s not pathetic at all. I don’t think we ever get over losing a parent, no matter how old we are when it happens. My heart aches that Landon and Livie don’t even remember Rayne. They know her from pictures and stories, which is why I try to keep her alive for them.” He tipped up her chin. “But you understand that loss and being here with them gives me peace. And the fact that they love you, too.”
Bella nodded as she rinsed out the dishcloth, then she gripped the edge of the sink. “I love being here.”
That same wistful tone again.
He stood behind her and rested his hands on her shoulders. “Why do I sense there’s a ‘but’ coming?”
“They’re great kids, Tuck. You’re very blessed. But this arrangement is only temporary.” She turned and folded her arms over her chest. “The longer I’m here, the harder it’s going to be to say goodbye.”
His heart slipped in his chest.
“Goodbye? Going somewhere?”
Shaking her head, she sighed. “No, but with the diner reopening in a few days, I’m going to be swamped with helping Dad. I want to help you as much as I can, especially with all the help you’ve given with me, but—”
“But you’re only one person with very little time. No worries. I get it. I knew this wasn’t permanent. I appreciate all you’ve done for us.”
“I’m not going to leave you in a lurch.”
“Bella, my childcare issue is not your problem. Your concern is helping your dad. You’ve put in a long hours this past week, and I really appreciate what you’ve done for us. So well, by the way.” Cupping her face, he stroked a thumb across her cheekbone, then slid a lock of hair behind her ear. Sliding a hand behind her neck, he pulled her to him gently and lowered his mouth to brush a kiss across her lips.
Bella sucked in a breath and took a step back, her eyes wide. She touched her lips, then looked up at him with large golden eyes. “Y-you kissed me.”
“Yes, I did.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“Is this going to become a habit?”
“Do you want it to be?”
She pressed a hand to his chest and lowered her eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t want to be used, Tucker.”
“Used? What are you talking about?” He frowned and took her hand in his.
She drew in a breath. “I’m totally fine with helping with the kids and appreciate the help you’re giving me in return, but I won’t be a stand-in because you’re missing your wife.”
“You think—” Tucker dropped her hand and turned away, grinding his jaw. Pulling in a deep breath, he exhaled slowly, then looked at her. “If my kiss offended you, I apologize. I kissed you because... I don’t know. The way the sunshine coming in through the window highlighted your face. Or maybe the sweet look you gave me. Or maybe to help ease some of the pain you’re still feeling. Or maybe I wanted to assure you that I see you. Not Rayne. But whatever. Again, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”
That was exactly why he needed to keep distance between his head and his heart. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Bella...or get hurt in return.
Chapter Six
Tucker had kissed her.
Tucker. Had. Kissed. Her.
And she’d ruined the tender moment by being a total jerk about it.
Oh, why did he have to go and complicate their relationship like that?
They were friends helping each other out. Nothing more.
Last night she’d tossed and turned with those same questions bouncing around in her head. Only to remember the gentleness of his lips against hers.
Oh, for crying out loud, she sounded like a sixteen-year-old. Next, she’d be doodling his name in her notebook.
Grow up.
It was just a kiss.
He was clear about not wanting to fall in love again, anyway.
And wasn’t that what she wanted, too?
Her parents’ marriage had proved love only led to heartbreak. Better to be a glorified nanny than to get her heart involved.
She needed to get her mind off Tucker and back on her work. She had a menu to finalize and specials to plan for the upcoming week.
Outside the rear kitchen door, high-pitched voices followed by low male tones grew louder, then the door opened and Livie and Landon burst into the kitchen.
“Izzie, we got you a surprise!” Livie and Landon thrust fistfuls of handpicked black-eyed Susans at her.
Isabella pulled off her gloves and tossed them in the trash. Smiling, she knelt in front of them and accepted their offerings. “Thank you. They’re perfect. I love them.”
“I picked mine first, then Landon copied me.” Livie made a face at her brother.
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
“Guys, does it matter? Giving gifts and being kind isn’t a competition.” She smoothed Livie’s flyaway hair back from her face. “I always wanted a brother or sister to copy.”
“Why? It’s so annoying.” Livie’s dramatic stretch of words and deep sigh made Isabella smile.
“Maybe Landon wants to be like you.”
Landon wrinkled his nose and made gagging sounds. “Ew, gross. I don’t want to be like a girl.”
Behind them, Tucker burst into laught
er, the rich sound causing Isabella’s stomach to jump.
Oh, good grief.
Still holding the wilting bouquets, Isabella headed to the service station in the dining room to retrieve a drinking glass. She returned to the kitchen, filled the glass with water and added the flowers. Then she set them on the pass-through window. “Now I can see them while I work. What are you guys doing here? Hungry? Anyone want a snack?”
“We had to go to the dentist to get our teeth counted. Daddy bought us ice cream cones.”
Isabella shot Tucker a look and raised her brow. “Ice cream and I wasn’t invited?”
He had the good sense to look chagrined as he pulled a lidded paper cup with a red straw out from behind his back and handed it to her.
She took it and drew on the straw. Thick chocolatey sweetness chilled her mouth. “This is so good. I haven’t had a chocolate shake in forever. Thanks for thinking of me.”
“You’re welcome. Remember how we used to stop by Sweeney’s and get shakes after work on Saturdays?”
Taking another sip on the straw, she lowered her eyes and nodded. And chose not to remind him that their weekly shake dates stopped after he started dating Rayne. “I haven’t thought of Sweeney’s in years.”
“They closed about eight years ago.” Tucker took her hand, his fingers still cool from holding on to her milkshake, and squeezed. “I’m going to run the kids back to school, then I’ll return and sample this special burger you’ve been talking about.”
She glanced at his long, strong fingers with nicks and scars covering hers and nodded. “I’ll be waiting.”
Oh great. Now he’d think she was eagerly awaiting his return.
He grinned and herded the twins back outside amid their choruses of goodbyes.
Once they left, she donned another pair of gloves and moved to the six-burner to make her red wine vinegar aioli. She measured out vinegar, brown sugar, orange zest and a handful of seasonings and combined everything in a saucepan to boil. Then she let it simmer and reduce down before incorporating it into the mayonnaise.