by K. I. Lynn
“Sounds like you want to see me again.”
He chuckled and pulled his bottom lip between his teeth as he yanked me against his chest. “Oh, I want there to be no doubt that this was just the beginning. I want to call you mine.” He leaned down and pressed his lips against my neck, working his way up until he was ghosting my lips. “So there is no misunderstanding, I’m going to pretend we are in high school—Roe Pierce, will you be my girlfriend?”
“Since you asked so nicely, I suppose so.”
My heart was beating double time and I was shocked at how easy it felt, how right, to agree. Still, inside the insecurity rumbled, and while I attempted to push it down, I also waited for the other shoe to drop. I wanted to bask in the warmth that filled me when we were together. That safety I’d only ever felt in his arms.
We walked down to my apartment where I changed into some black leggings, a flowing, long-sleeved dusty rose top, and some black booties before throwing my hair up into a ponytail. A quick swipe of some mascara and I topped the look off with an eclectic mix of the few bangle bracelets I had left.
I really wanted to go shopping for replacements.
“How do I look?” I asked, holding my arms out. It was definitely a casual look, and I knew he wasn’t used to seeing me with little to no makeup.
A grin broke out on his face, and he pulled me into his chest. “With every look I decide you can’t get more beautiful, and then you top it.”
I rolled my eyes. “This is barely caring casual.”
“And I love it.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine.
The heat made me bow into him. Whenever he did that, I lost all thought.
“Ready?” he asked.
I blinked at him. “Huh?”
“Kinsey?”
I straightened and pulled away from him. “Yes! Now stop being so distracting.”
“Me? Distracting?”
I turned away from him and grabbed my purse. “Yes. With your hypnotizing eyes, your smell-so-good, too-gorgeous-for-your-own-good, sexy-as-fuck self.”
He leaned down and whispered against my ear, “The feeling is mutual, you know. You’ve been distracting me for over a month.”
I reached back, cupping his neck and holding him close, reveling in his presence and drowning in the warm emotions he filled me with.
When we arrived to lunch, an older version of Roe with brown eyes stood from a table. Her eyes were wide as she stared up at me, then back to her daughter.
“Mom, this is Thane. Thane, my mom.”
“Pleased to meet you,” I said, holding out my hand.
She swallowed, seemingly at a loss for words. “Please, call me Linda.”
Kinsey cooed from her stroller, and I leaned over to pick her up. When I straightened, Roe and her mom were whispering to each other, but I couldn’t make out their words due to the noise in the restaurant.
Whatever they said must not have been bad as Linda’s cheeks pinked when she looked back to me holding Kinsey.
Lunch was pleasant, with Linda sharing embarrassing moments of her eldest daughter, including the time she got caught trying to sneak out to see a boy when she was fifteen. She apparently yelled at her mom about having no idea what it was like to be in love.
Roe simply covered her face and shook her head while saying, “I was a teenager!”
Afterwards, we returned to Roe’s apartment and put Kinsey down for her afternoon nap. It was then that I got to see where Kinsey slept.
Roe’s apartment was small, her bedroom tight, and when I entered, there was no crib. I watched her walk through another doorway and followed, surprised to find a decent-sized walk-in closet. At the end, under a window, sat a white crib. The walls around were filled with Roe’s stuff, and I looked back into the bedroom to find she was using her dresser as a changing table. One drawer was partially open, and inside there were lots of tiny clothes.
It was tight, but she managed to make it work. But what happened when Kinsey got older?
A vision of one of my spare bedrooms flashed into my mind, but I pushed it back. We were way too early for that idea. Right?
Once she was down, Roe closed the door to the bedroom most of the way, and we moved out into the main room.
“What now?” she asked.
I took her into my arms and grinned down at her. “I can think of a few things.”
She rolled her eyes and stepped away, flinging herself onto the chaise end of her couch. She tugged at her shoes and tossed them onto the floor, then patted the space next to her.
“Talk? Movie? Game? Which reminds me—why did you get me a PS4?”
I sat down next to her, then pointed to the built-in hutch. “You have a couple of games.”
She nodded. “Good eye. Those are my games. The PlayStation was Pete’s.”
“It plays Blu-rays as well, so it seemed perfect. How long did he live here with you?” I asked. The curiosity had been burning ever since we bumped into him. Knowing Roe the way I did, I was a bit surprised to see who she dated before me. Maybe they were different when they met. After all, I was certain Roe had changed since she took in Kinsey, just as I knew I changed when I found out I was going to be a father—a loss that still hurt seven years later.
“We moved in last July, and the first week of November I brought Kinsey home, so not quite four months.” She pursed her lips. “I should have clued in during that time.”
“Clued into what?”
“We never had sex here. If he wasn’t getting it with me…”
“He was getting it somewhere.” A fucking cheater. “Wait, so this place isn’t christened?”
Her hand flew back into my stomach. “Four times in less than twenty-four hours and eight orgasms—you have to give me a small break. I’m not used to it.”
All of her weight had been in my arms, but I managed to squeeze two more out of her in the shower, topping the promised seven.
I slipped my fingers between hers and loved the sigh she let out as she leaned to rest her head against my arm.
“All the time you need.” I turned and pressed my lips to the top of her head. “I like your mom.”
“You definitely impressed her.”
“Good.”
“Can I ask you something about your mom?”
I stiffened but was determined not to close that part of my life off to her. It was a step in gaining her trust and if I wanted to be with her, she would know one day.
I nodded and swallowed hard. “Okay.”
“When you were upset that day with the coffee because your mom called, what happened?”
I squeezed her hand and lifted my leg onto the chaise, getting full contact with hers. The comfort was a must with the subject, and a momentary distraction when I noticed how much further my leg went past the end of her toes.
“That was my birth mom. She’s contacted me half a dozen times over the years.”
“Birth mom?”
I’d told Roe I was once in a situation like Kinsey, but she didn’t know the details of how or why. “My father had full custody since I was little.”
“How long had it been since you’d heard from her?”
“Eleven years this time.”
She ran her hand up and down my arm. “No wonder you were upset. That’s a long time.”
“She never told me why, but I also didn’t really give her the chance before I hung up.”
“When did she leave?”
“When I was five. Dad kicked her out after…” I closed my eyes to push back the image that was trying to surface.
Roe ran her fingers through my hair, and a groan left me as I leaned into her touch.
“After what?” she asked.
“She started out with opioids after a car accident on her way home from work when I was two. It quickly progressed, and she was always running after that high. I don’t have many memories of her, but the few I do have aren’t good. My dad has filled me in a lot.”
“What made
him kick her out?”
I blew out a breath. The subject was difficult. I was so young, but that day scared me in ways I couldn’t voice.
“Do you remember after the elevator and how I said I don’t do well in ones that aren’t moving, just like you?” I asked.
She nodded. “You said it was horror, but not a movie.”
I adjusted my position and took hold of her other hand so I was holding both. “She chased that high all the way to a broken-down high-rise in a shady part of town. After she got what she needed, we got back into the elevator. It had barely moved when she was shooting up. Then the elevator violently rocked and came to an abrupt stop.”
I could still feel the shake, being thrown against the wall of the cab. The emptiness and the fear were overpowering.
“The light flickered and I was so scared, trapped in that small space. I was just a little boy needing his mother, and no matter how much I screamed and cried, it couldn’t pull the needle from her vein or the glassy look out of her eyes. Eventually my cries alerted someone, and the police were called.”
Roe lunged at me, swinging her leg across mine and straddling my hips. Her arms wrapped tightly around me, holding me close.
“Thane. Oh, my God, Thane.”
I held her with all my strength, using her to ground me, to remind me that while there were people like my mother in the world, there were also angels like Roe.
And that was what I saw when I looked at her. What would have happened to Kinsey if Roe hadn’t been so selfless and hadn’t taken her in? What would have happened if Kinsey’s mom ever had custody of her? Would she end up in situations like the ones that haunted my dreams, or something worse?
I lost track of time, but eventually the emotions subsided and I pulled back.
“Enough on me. Tell me more about Ryn.”
She ground her teeth together. “I feel for your dad. To love someone and watch them totally change, completely succumb to the high, hurting friends and family for their next fix. Trying to help them, spending so much time and energy only to have them leave rehab within days and sending your money down the drain. Waiting for that call from the police, whether it be jail or the morgue.”
The heaviness in her voice must have been made of stones that had piled high over years. I ran my hand up and down her back, soothing her as she did for me.
“Ryn got with the wrong crowd in high school. But her issues started before that. We knew a lot of kids who lost parents, but with Ryn, it was like she thought she was the only one. That only her father died that day. She barely remembered him, but still, she used him dying as an excuse for everything, and people let her get away with it.”
“You don’t like manipulators,” I said, remembering what she’d once told me.
She shook her head. “Ryn was a master manipulator even as a child. But like with your dad, a child was in danger and I had to cut her off. She’s only seen Kinsey a few times, and once she didn’t even notice she was in front of her. For Kinsey’s well-being, I can’t even with Ryn anymore.”
I nodded. We hadn’t talked much about that night, but despite her anger, I could tell Roe still cared about her sister. “It’s completely understandable. And I don’t want her anywhere near you. What she did was unforgivable.”
Roe nodded against my neck. “I just hope wherever she is, she’s okay and that she stays there.”
The air was heavy and thick, but also filled with comfort and peace. Neither of us moved. We simply held each other. After a while, a sigh left her.
She pulled back, and our eyes met. “Do you want to stay for dinner?”
It was the middle of the afternoon, but I knew my answer. “I’d stay forever if you’d let me.”
She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “I’ve officially been your girlfriend for eight hours.”
“Has it been long enough to move on to the next step?”
“Unless that step is a blow job, the answer is no.”
“Well, in that case…” I grinned at her, then leaned forward to capture her lips with mine. “I’ll wait until I’ve proven my boyfriend status, but that doesn’t mean later I’m not going to try and get between these thighs.”
“Technically, you are between them.”
“Don’t say that.”
“Why not?”
I bit down on her bottom lip and pulled. “Because I have no problem ripping them open and sinking you down on my dick.”
She popped up from my lap and was across the room, leaving me with my arms out reaching for her.
“You’re not ruining my favorite leggings. So…” She stepped over to the built-in hutch. “Game or Netflix?”
“This is still weird,” Roe said as she slipped into the passenger’s seat. It wasn’t the first time I’d picked her up at the daycare she took Kinsey to every morning.
I pulled away from the curb and into traffic before slipping my hand in hers. “It’s been three days now. Why is it weird?”
On Monday she’d been late again, and that was when the idea hit me. I knew the daycare was close, so why not just pick her up?
I pulled her hand to my lips and kissed it. “I like driving with you to work.”
“I do too. It’s just that this is New York City. You take public transportation. That’s just how it works. You don’t drive to work.” She shook her head. It wasn’t the first time she brought up my driving, but I didn’t think it was as strange as she did. To me it was odd to not drive, but it was the opposite for her, having grown up in a city with such a huge transportation infrastructure.
“Well, I do.”
“You do realize that just highlights how much of an outsider you are, right?”
I shrugged. “I rode the trains for years. I don’t need the experience or whatever you’re thinking I might be missing.”
“It’s not that. It’s just—” She waved her hand in front of her to the stopped traffic. “How can you stand the stop and start?”
“The train does the same.”
“I suppose, but the only thing I have to pay attention to is which stop is mine.”
A thought occurred to me. Having lived in Manhattan her entire life, had she ever left the city? Not only that, did she even know how to drive?
“Have you ever driven a car?”
She shook her head. “Never been a need.”
“Have you ever left the city?”
“I’ve been to Italy once, and I went on a Caribbean cruise a few years back. Then there was the time we went to a family reunion in Iowa, but Mom drove.”
I almost wanted to say she’d led a sheltered life, but New York was the original concrete jungle.
“When we go to North Carolina, I’ll teach you to drive. You never know when you’ll need it.”
“We’re going to North Carolina?” she asked.
“I hope someday. Maybe next summer, we can spend a week at the lake house. There is a sandy shore that I bet Kinsey would love to play at,” I said, smiling as I envision us making sand castles. She seemed stunned. “What is it?”
“I just… I guess I hadn’t thought that far into our future.”
“Would you not want to go?”
She shook her head. “No, no, that’s not it.” She reached over and placed her hand on mine. “I would love to go, and you’re right. Kinsey would love it too.”
I was happy she agreed, and suddenly my mind was awash with all the things we could do. I couldn’t wait for my family to meet her.
Twenty minutes later, we pulled into the parking garage and headed to the elevator.
“What can I cook my girls for dinner tonight?” I asked as we walked.
“Well, that’s not something I’m used to hearing.”
I shrugged. “My dad worked a lot and before my mom came into our lives, I kind of had to fend for myself. Luckily, the neighbor that watched me a lot taught me. She always told me that there wasn’t much a woman found sexier than a man who could cook.”
Roe le
aned in and whispered so that none of the bystanders would hear her while we waited for an elevator. “She was right. And you really don’t need to get any sexier. I promise you’ve reached sexy enough. In fact, you blew right past it.”
A chuckle left me. “Am I too sexy for my shirt?”
That earned me a laugh, and she leaned against me. There was another guy watching us, or rather, staring at Roe. I wrapped my arm around her waist and held her close to ward him off.
When the hell did I become the jealous type? Probably from the moment her hazel eyes met mine.
“We should get some coffee on our way up,” I said in an effort to avoid the bitter brown water from the break room.
“We’ll be late.”
I grinned down at her. “I don’t think your boss will mind.”
“Abusing your status again, I see,” a familiar voice said from behind us.
I turned and shrugged at him. “Morning, James.”
He smiled as he looked at us, noting my arm around Roe’s waist. “Two months ago, I would have never imagined you two would get together.”
“Because I’m an arrogant ass and she’s the queen of wit smacking me down at every turn?”
He chuckled. “Pretty much.”
The elevator arrived, and at least twelve people loaded in. I pulled Roe close to me as we crammed in.
When we arrived on the lobby floor and squeezed out, James waved at us. “See you at ten.”
I looked down at Roe as we moved to the line for the coffee shop. “Do I have a meeting with James at ten?”
She shrugged. “Do I look like your assistant?”
My lips formed a thin line. “There is a likeness, but you are much prettier than Crystal.”
“Bias. She’s married and I’m your girlfriend, so you have to say that.”
Pride filled me when “I’m your girlfriend” flowed from her easily as she spoke.
For over a week, I spent all of my free time with Roe. I was happy, ecstatic. But every night I went home to my cold condo, missing the warmth of her tiny apartment. After some time alone, I couldn’t help texting her or calling her.
Our working relationship was running smoother than ever, but the banter wasn’t completely gone. Now it was laced with innuendos of what we would do to each other that night.