His mother was twisting her necklace back and forth, her fingers tightening and releasing. She was nervously chewing on her bottom lip, a habit she had picked up of late. Josh looked at her scowling brow and angry eyes. She looked more upset than ever. Josh let out a sigh. It’s just like the day his father died, thought Josh, it’s the same look. Josh walked into the kitchen just as the large police officer who had asked him so many questions cleared his throat rather loudly.
“Mom, I need to go get Jackie!” Desiree looked at him wondering what had happened to her son. She couldn’t bear the thought of it all. “Mom, I need to go get Walter’s bird. Her name is Jackie and she’s all alone!”
“We’ve already taken care of that little fellow.” The officer with the deep voice said kindly.
“Well, where are you taking her?” Josh demanded.
“We will take good care of her, don’t you worry.”
Josh began to shout and yell over the other officers who had been there for hours, waiting for a full background check and inspecting the area.
“Can I keep her, please, please, please?” He pouted, his lower lip stuck out as he tried to activate tear ducts that had cried so much earlier that they were dried out now.
Desiree didn’t want anything that belonged to that perverted old man. Anger penetrated through her very being. This is his fault. It all goes back to him! If Benjamin Stewart had not killed my husband, my son would never have met this crazy old man, and he sure as hell would have thought twice about breaking into my home, she thought.
“No, now go back to bed Josh!” She felt sick inside. She’d have to call the pediatrician, her psychiatrist, and talk to an attorney from the firm. She instantly thought of Bradford and how only a couple nights before she was enjoying herself having a pleasant conversation with a handsome mysterious man.
Josh stomped his foot and ran from the room, jetting straight towards the front door. You would have never known he’d thrown up three times that day as he ran towards the police cars. His mother and the officer with the deep voice and curly hair followed him. Josh pulled on the police doors, but they wouldn’t open. His mother grabbed him by his pajama top and gave him a quick jerk, “Listen here Josh, I know you are upset, we all are, but you can’t keep the bird!”
Desiree started feeling guilty. She didn’t know what all Josh had been through. She didn’t even want to imagine the sick possibilities. She peered up at the officer, “Is the bird evidence or . . .” she hadn’t finished her thought when he interrupted her.
“You want to take a look Josh and see what your mom thinks?”
“Yes, yes,” Josh jumped a foot off the ground his stomach did a flip flop and he felt a little nauseous, but only for a second.
The officer bent down in to the back of his parole car and lifted the wire cage out. He gently sat it on the driveway for Desiree and Josh to see. Jackie cooed and jumped up and down like Josh had earlier. “What kind of bird is it?” Desiree asked as if the officer would know.
“Looks like some kind of pigeon miss, not really sure, though.”
“Could it carry diseases?” She’d always been leery of bird droppings, ever since her puppy got infected with parvo when she was a child. She had never forgotten how sick he’d gotten. He wouldn’t eat or drink, just laid there dehydrated and throwing up. Her mother kept saying, the bird droppings, that’s what caused it.
“I don’t know Ms. Levite, but I am sure you can take it to the vet and get it checked out. The strange thing about this bird; it’s got some kind of holding device attached to its leg, as if to carry something.” Officer Rolland said, he thought it was a homing pigeon.
Oh yes, Desiree had heard about them but couldn’t remember what specifically, “Okay Josh, but only if everything checks out okay at the vet.”
“Yes, yes, thank you, thank you!” Josh grabbed the handle of the cage and tugged, but it was useless he couldn’t lift it.
“Hold on there Josh, the bird stays in the garage until it checks out! Got it, his mother said?”
Josh agreed. He knew Walter would be happy when he got out of the hospital to find out he’d taken such good care of her. Josh just knew they would be very good friends. He kept telling his mother that, but for some reason it seemed to upset her more and then she got that look on her face that reminded Josh of the worst memory he’d ever had. He could still picture it as if it were yesterday. It was the black shiny coffee with his daddy inside and the men were lowering it into the ground. Josh decided to go in his room and be alone for a bit. He wished Jackie could sleep next to him, but she was safe in the garage. Josh closed his eyes and tried to picture all the neat things he could teach Jackie until finally after a day full of exhaustion he was fast asleep.
Marcie
Chapter 13
Marcie felt so many emotions lying next to Benjamin. She always knew it would be like this, now that he had opened up to her about the car crash. If only she could get him to forget about his fiancé. She just knew, in time, he would become so engrossed with her that he’d completely lose himself. She smiled thinking about how upset her father would be when she brought him home. She hated all their snooty, uppity friends and had spent an entire summer during her freshman year rebelling. She wore gothic clothes, black nail polish, heavy black eyeliner and shaved her head except for a row down the center that she died florescent pink. Then she pierced her nose, belly button and ear cartilage. But she soon tired of this, and subsequently, she decided in her sophomore year to appease her father by playing the part of a well-groomed CEO’s daughter, which earned her a credit card with a hefty limit. If Benjamin would have known her before the transformation, would he have loved that girl, the rebel with a Mohawk? She ran her fingers across his hand and pressed in even closer to his body. She knew her mother and father would disapprove of Benjamin and that gave him that much more appeal.
Even though Marcie loathed her parents, her grandmother had made up for them immensely. Marcie found herself spending countless hours listening to her grandma Lilly reminisce about her past. She would help her with her flower gardens and with filling the countless bird feeders that lined her property. She even learned to enjoy hot tea and classical music. Lilly would serve tea in delicate china cups on a silver platter. There was a cream pitcher and a bowl of sugar cubes with silver tongs. Unlike her father, she didn’t live in a large cold home but a warm inviting cottage, with a large yard and old trees that lined the property, giving character to its already charming surroundings. She couldn’t wait for Benjamin to meet her.
“Benjamin, what are your grandmothers like?”
Benjamin shifted his leg and trapped her with it, overlapping her legs. He smiled up at her and wondered how to even answer that question. “What grandmothers? I don’t have any.”
“You mean they’re both dead?” Marcie squinted up at him and held her hands up, “Well?” She wondered if Benjamin had any warm happy stories to tell, as she waited for his response.
“I’m not sure I even remember Marcie. My father’s mother died before I was born and my mother’s, well, I was young when she passed too. Let’s see, I can faintly recall her hair. I think it was dark and always in a twisted bun. She would come out to the car and greet my mom when we came to visit, which was rare because Larry never liked to let mom out of his sight. Grandma always had a box of candy canes. They were yellow and blue and green striped, not like the Christmas canes you’d get during the holidays, but different. She died though when I was around nine or ten, so I don’t have a lot of memories of her, sorry.”
“What was her name, Ben?”
“That I do remember because it was so unique. Her name was Reedafae, but mom just called her Reeda. Why do you ask?”
“I was just thinking about how much you would love my Grandma Lilly,” Marcie said.
“I bet I would Marcie. We never had much company, due to my dad.”
“Why’s that, Ben?”
“He’s a first-class jerk.” Ma
rcie looked into Benjamin’s eyes and saw a fear she hadn’t seen before.
“My father’s a pretty big jerk himself,” she said raising her eyebrows upward.
Benjamin wondered how long before this whole situation blew up in his face. He couldn’t confide in her about his messed up childhood. She’d leave for sure then. He had to stop giving her pieces of himself. He was mixing lies with the truth, lies about an imaginary lover who had died violently. Benjamin knew that the man he killed had a wife who was telling a very different story. He hated himself; how could he let anyone love him when he couldn’t even love himself.
“My dad can beat up your dad,” Benjamin said poking her in the rib playfully.
“Stop it, Ben!” Marcie squealed.
“Somebody’s ticklish?”
Marcie settled back beside him her thoughts multiplying. What was so evil about Benjamin’s father?
She knew that her father was an important man. Even as a small child she felt the power of his presence. Maybe it was the way his posture rose up and towered over her or his eyes that held hers and made her look away first. Yes, her father had the ability to make her want to impress him and yet she knew that it was useless. Her father had another side and it was this side that came out to charm, becoming the main focus even in a room filled with attractions. Marcie was always invisible, even to her mother who seemed to have lacked any nurturing qualities. Marcie raised up on her elbow and peered down at Benjamin, curiosity filling her. “Benjamin, what was your mother like?”
“I don’t know Marcie. She was your average mother I guess. What is this History 101? You writing a book or what?” He frowned and wished the conversation would go elsewhere.
“Sorry, just trying to get to know you better.” Marcie wasn’t sure why the men she chose always had walls so high and so thick. Now she felt a twinge of rejection, but, of course, this is what drove her. It was all she knew.
Marcie had learned how to gauge the emotions of those around her. She became an expert at their posture, gestures, eyes that dropped down and wouldn’t look up at you. She had learned shiftiness, lips that pursed, pouted, and twisted, yes she had learned by watching those around her. Now she wondered how long it would take her to learn Benjamin and the many idiosyncrasies he carried. She wondered how long before he let his walls down. She hoped he was not like her father who became completely bored with her mother and had countless affairs with her nannies growing up. He seduced his secretaries and discarded them like wrapping paper. Marcie had grown tired of trying to fight for her father’s attention, but she was sure she could get Benjamin’s. But then what?
Benjamin shifted on the couch, leaving Marcie alone with her thoughts. He knew she had fallen for the story about his make believe fiancé, and he felt like he had found a way to cover his secrets. Marcie lingered over his long lean body and stretched out next to him. He rubbed her shoulder, then her arm, slowly caressing her. She could feel his breath on her neck and she was slowly becoming aroused, but it was different this time. Marcie finally felt like she had met the only other person who had suffered as much as she had. In time, Benjamin could be the person who she could let into that secret place. She had let him look into her eyes, clear down into her soul without shifting, without acting. She, like him, had mixed the mortar and brick by brick built the walls that safely protected her, but she felt the tower crumbling as he held her close.
Benjamin slid his arm into the opening of her sweater and brushed his hand across her stomach. Her skin was so soft, and he found himself pulling her towards him. His lips tasted hers and softly, slowly he lingered over them teasingly. Everything felt so right. It was as if her skin was licking up his, melting into him, morphing and changing into one. He didn’t want to love her; he wanted to use her like he did the other girls, but with Marcie, something seemed different. She’ll eventually find out the truth, he thought, and then where will that leave us? He removed his hand from her top and placed it around her waist, then closed his eyes and he pretended to be content.
Marcie felt his spirit pulling away from her. Even though he was holding her, something had changed. Marcie smelled his fear. She then began to wonder what his fiancé had looked like. She knew her name had been Debbie or Deborah, but that was it. Needing some space, she removed his arm and shuffled towards the restroom. She was so close to getting him to want her, she knew it. He was just scared.
“Do you care if I stay here for the night, I’m kind of buzzing?”
“Sure no problem.” Benjamin’s words made her heart jump; she knew now exactly what to do. Giving herself away had become a habit for Marcie that often left her feeling empty and used. If sex was what they wanted, why did they leave her afterward? She had pondered this time and again, but with Benjamin something seemed different. If she didn’t do something quickly, he might leave her and find someone else, but she needed him desperately. Everything would be different with him. She could help him get over his past and give him the courage to live again.
She sat down on the commode and peed, then looked into the medicine cabinet mirror and rubbed a spot of smudged mascara from underneath her eye, then unclasped her hair and let it fall. She then pulled off the turtle neck sweater and unclasped the second item, her bra. She pulled off her corduroys and socks, leaving on nothing but the black sheer lace low rise panties that held on to her hips. Marcie opened the bathroom door, not realizing that her body was sacred and not an offering of appetite. She walked past the back of the couch and made her way to the fridge. “You want another beer, she said?’ “Sure, sounds good,” Benjamin mouthed the words, wondering how the night would end.
Marcie strolled into the living room holding one beer bottle, which she uncapped rather seductively tossing the cap over her shoulder. Benjamin was suddenly more awake and more aroused than he thought he’d ever been in his life. Marcie tilted the beer bottle letting some of it drip down her concave stomach. She looked past Benjamin’s eyes and said, “Thirsty?”
Promises
Chapter 14
Bradford Stiltz jolted from sleep and poked at the alarm clock that showed four fifteen am, before realizing it was the phone on the nightstand that was making such a noise. He fumbled for the receiver, dropping it once before getting the ear piece on his ear. On the other end, he heard a frantic voice sobbing in between sighs. It was Desiree and he wasn’t able to make heads or tails out of what she was saying.
“Calm down Des,” he said before he realized he had given her a pet name. “Slow down and take a deep breath.” He heard her blow her nose into a tissue in the background, as her breathing began to adjust.
“Gosh Bradford, I am so sorry, I didn’t even realize how early it was. I haven’t been to bed yet.” Then she heard his calm, but firm voice.
“It’s alright Des, now tell me what’s going on?”
Desiree did not know where to begin because her mind was swooning and her thoughts were spinning. “Someone broke into my house and they were here when I came home with the children and they were wearing . . . .” She began to sob uncontrollably, and Bradford was shocked to hear this strong woman he had just had dinner with the night before so vulnerable.
“Would you like me to come over there, Des? I can move some appointments?”
Desiree wanted Bradford to come over more than he knew. She wanted any man who was strong to come in and rescue her at that very moment. “Oh God, Bradford, I am sorry, I need to calm down and get my head on. I have to be at work in a couple hours and I have to take Josh to the doctor,” and she began to ramble on and then stopped herself. “Oh crap, how am I going to make it to work?” She wiped her nose again and panicked, “Yes, do you mind, I really need someone?”
“I’m on my way,” he said reassuringly. Desiree hung up the phone and wondered what she had gotten herself into. She raced to the bathroom and peered into the vanity mirror. Her eyes were swollen and there were dark circles under them. She washed her face and brushed her teeth and grabbed her basebal
l cap off the dresser. Her worn blue jeans and jersey t-shirt was a far cry from the dress clothes she had to wear for the office. She rushed through the house picking up toys and straightening up books, then put a fresh pot of coffee on and picked up the cups left by the officers. Then she plopped down in an overstuffed chair, her mind racing from all the events. Letting out a much overdue sigh, she drifted off to sleep.
Bradford pulled his Jeep Cherokee out of the garage and headed across town to Desiree’s. He stopped at a bagel shop, ordered two breakfast sandwiches and an assortment of donuts for the kids. He knew she had two children and he’d heard a lot about them. Desiree had been a great co-worker and a friend to him in the workplace. Bradford was used to dating women with children; he was the only person he knew over forty without any. He immediately thought of Patty and felt heartache, but that was the past and there was no changing it now. He knew he had a son, and he knew he was out there somewhere. Maybe someday they would meet. Bradford had read the countless stories of twins separated at birth that had found each other. There were plenty of adopted children who ended up meeting their real birth parents, some out of pure mishap and others went to extreme measures to find their real parents. Some just wanted to know why. Others wanted to get medical records and some were angry at being discarded and feeling unworthy to be kept. It was sad and yet so many people were unable to bear children and loved these babies as if they were their very own. He hoped his son had been raised with love and affection.
Bradford turned into the subdivision and noticed the small houses that lined the street. Most of the homes were adorned with a welcome mat and a porch swing. Bradford missed the warm feel of his childhood home. He hated the large, cold neighborhood he lived in, with the neighborhood police as he liked to describe them. If his yard were brought under the scrutiny of the board and it wasn’t the perfectly manicured image they had set, they sent out someone to correct it and then shot you the bill. Everything is up for discussion, from the size of your fence and the type, attached or unattached garage, the length and type of your pool and the pool house. It was all too much for anyone to really enjoy. Bradford had bought it because most everyone at the firm lived there, and they all convinced him that it was a good investment.
Walter The Homeless Man Page 6