Caught between love and fear, Victoria stood speechless. She loved Juan, but not enough to go with him under the conditions they would all be in. The timing was off.
Juan understood her predicament. "If you ever need to get in touch with me, write to my mother in Monterrey. She will see that I get my messages." He handed her his pistol. "You will need this," he said.
"Juan, I—" Victoria could not speak anymore and burst into tears. She laid the gun down on the ground and covered her face with her hands, trying to hide her uncontrollable grief and fear. "Please don't leave us here! We need you more than ever!" She continued to weep.
"Take good care of Felicia. She is a good person." Juan said. Then he glanced toward Dan and said, "Adiós, amigo! God be with you. Some day, I'll see you in Texas." Looking for Señor Martinez, he said, "Gracias, Señor, for everything you have done for us, the Americanos, and the girls. One day I will replay you—you can mark my words! Gracias!"
After speaking those words, Juan rode off toward the gold mines and disappeared over the high Sierras road, catching up with the two Americanos, heading to his important meeting with Luis.
*****
For the next six days in the high mountainous village, Victoria and Dan watched over Felicia until she was strong enough to make the final trip back to the hacienda in Monterrey. They had only one horse among the three of them. Felicia would have to do most of the riding, while the other two would have to walk; the trip would be slow and treacherous. They were fortunate that Dan had a canteen to carry water. The area was desolate after they passed the gold mines and dangerously full of bandits. They had to be cautious and always on their guard as they traveled the mountains path.
While they hiked the unfamiliar trail, Dan occasionally held the reins to the horse, all the while keeping an eye on Felicia. He tried to console Victoria. "Don't worry, Missy," he said. "You'll see Juan again. I'll promise you that. I'll see that we all get back to ol' Monterrey and back to the border. Everything is going to be just fine, you'll see."
"One thing I have to tell you, Dan, is that when we reach the hacienda, my father will be waiting for us. Please don't say anything about Juan. Please don't mention his name around my father. There is a long story behind this, and I will tell you the whole sordid affair while we walk."
Dan Land promised Victoria never to repeat Juan's name, as he listened to her relate the details of the story.
Victoria felt empty inside and her thoughts swirled and eddied. She went for hours without saying a word, while watching her step on the harsh terrain. Felicia was still weak but kept a good grip on the reins of the weary horse. The first day they traveled most of the day and during the night, through the thickest part of the country. But the second day, they traveled during the night and rested during the day. Water was getting hard to find, and their faces and lips were starting to burn and chap.
Once in a while, they would hear horses galloping in their direction, either Federalist soldiers or bandidos. They did not know for sure, for they would always hide in the dense mountainous forest. On one occasion, they had to hide in a dry ditch among the parched branches, holding onto the horse's nose to keep him quiet, while soldiers hurried by several yards away. The three were haggard, weary, and hungry, but before long, they eventually found themselves at the Hinojosa hacienda.
CHAPTER 23
It had been a long journey, and a strange haunting loneliness possessed Victoria, Felicia, and Dan Land, when they finally reached their destination at the Hinojosa's hacienda.
As they approached the iron gates, they saw that one was torn off; the other one hung in midair by its hinges as a soft wind from the east made it squeak. They looked at each other, baffled, and then saw the devastating destruction. The evidence of war was all around them; the three stood and faced the bare facts of evil.
From the driveway leading to the hacienda, they could see that some of the orchards were destroyed and uprooted, and others were lean but remained in bloom. There was no hacienda. Smoke swirled upward from the remains of the big house and the peasants' quarters. Only the whitewashed walls and archery range remained. Much of the greenery of the vines and bushes lingered. Time and time again, the revolutionists had proved themselves skilled at destruction.
"Where are Grandmother and Great-grandmother? Where are they?" cried Victoria, out of despair and frustration.
They kept walking toward the smoking hacienda. Dan and Victoria staggered abreast, leading the skeletal horse that Felicia barely hung onto, and continued their slow trek towards the burning rubble. The three appeared skeletal, looking drawn and ghostly.
"How this poor horse made it this far, beats me! He hasn't had any water except for the little juice of maguey cactus several hours ago," remarked Dan, gaunt and wearier than ever. "I don't have the heart to kill him."
Hours before, they had stopped to rest and check on Felicia's condition. Out of the dense jungle cacti, an old man appeared with a burro loaded with all of his worldly goods, heading out of the city. He reported that the revolutionists had taken over all of the rich haciendas. There was no food to be found anywhere. The water was unsafe to drink, he told them, except for the mountain creeks. In the big city of Monterrey, the people were dying like flies from the "Black Plague." The Federalists had driven General Garcia out of town, and now General Nafarrate was going to take over Matamoros. The majority of the radicals that were caught had been shot.
"I don't think I can take another step," gasped Victoria faintly. She had walked most of the way with Dan at her side, occasionally riding with Felicia to rest her bleeding feet.
"Yes, you can!" Dan encouraged her. He was kinder than any man they had ever met.
All three travelers were emaciated. Their eyes had retreated deep into their sockets. Their garments were tattered and threadbare. Food had been so scarce that they had eaten only roots and berries that twisted and pained their growling, empty stomachs. They looked more like hunted coyotes, with doom dangling over them like the angel of death.
Getting closer to the ruins, they caught a glimpse of a woman with a black shawl covering her head, trying to find the remains of any food or valuable trinkets. A crying baby clung to her breasts. Seeing the trio approach, she became startled and ran and hid among the fallen walls and smoking debris.
"Wait, Señora," yelled Victoria. "What happened to this hacienda? Where are the people who used to live in this place? Where is La Señora Hinojosa? Where is everybody?"
Hearing the name Hinojosa, the peasant woman peeked through fallen stone and lumber and eyed them intently before she said anything. "Who goes there?"
"We belong to this hacienda. What happened to the people who lived here?"
"A war has started," replied the woman, surprised. "Where have you been? Weeks ago, the news of Madero's death brought chaos and destruction to all of the big landowners. All of the peasants in this hacienda, along with the revolutionists, destroyed and burned this place down and killed many. My husband was killed trying to defend our children and me. Many of my relatives were killed and many of the young girls were raped and dragged away by the revolutionaries to become soldadera and do their cooking. Most of the young men joined and were taken into the war. The Federalists came after, but it was already too late. We heard that there was a shoot-out between them in Monterrey. I stayed here because of my children. Everyone who has stayed is frightened. Most of the men are now fighting for Pancho Villa or have joined Carranza to take over the Republic."
At a loss for words, Victoria desperately responded, “And the people who lived here were all killed?"
"La Señora Alvarado was killed from a hard blow to her head. Juana died with a bullet through her heart, trying to help the old Señora. It was a miracle that La Señora Hinojosa had left several days before to go to Mexico City to recover the body of her dead husband."
"All dead, all killed!" cried Victoria, now terrified. "What are we going to do now?"
The young infant starte
d to cry, and the woman began rocking it in her arms. She continued, "Yesterday, several men with guns and riding horses mentioned they were from Texas and were looking for two young girls. They were wondering if you had returned from school."
"Father was already here? Where did they go?" Victoria asked hopefully.
"They were asking a lot of questions. The older man with white hair, I think it was your father since I had seen him visiting the hacienda many times, said they were going to the Del Calderóne hacienda to see what they could find. Everything is lost! Everything is gone!" She kept saying that with much sorrow and departed with her baby in her arms still crying. She disappeared behind the burning, fallen wreckage to where the rest of her children were hiding.
All dead! All killed! Dead! The words rang through Victoria's mind. Any minute she was going to lose control and faint. Dan grabbed her just in time and supported her. He had already taken Felicia off the horse, laid her on the ground, and had found water in the nearby running creek for all of them to drink. He had taken the blanket off the horse and had led the dying horse into the creek to drink and recover from the grueling trip.
"Hold on," remarked Dan. "We will stay here and find shelter until your father returns. We'll find food and rest. You'll see. Everything is going to be all right."
Victoria, finally succumbing to the horror, fell limply into Dan's arms.
*****
Many hours had passed when Victoria came to her senses. She opened her eyes to find her father Don Federico, Roy Dale, Ricardo, and several vaqueros from Spanish Acres hovered over her, waiting for her to regain consciousness. Ricardo had hold of her hand and spoke. "Querida, you are going to be all right. I'm so glad we found you in one piece."
Don Federico's face was burnt and hardened by the sun. His hair had now turned white, and he had aged considerably since she had last seen him. Thinking it was perhaps a vision or a dream, Victoria opened her chapped lips and tried to speak. "Papá!"
Later, she vaguely remembered being lifted into a wagon and, for the first time, feeling warm again, with blankets covering her chilled body. She could hear the whinnying of horses and the crunch of wagon wheels rolling. She could feel Felicia's body next to her as the bumpy and uncomfortable trip progressed. Time passed, but how much, she did not know. Occasionally, she would feel the pull from the wagon as it turned, and the hard bumps from the rocky road causing the wagon to lurch and sway.
She could hear voices of different people talking in the distance, but she couldn't catch their words. Her mind kept spinning. A vision of Doña Adela appeared. She could see her old and wrinkled face, with her fingers all twisted, pointing to the Mexican fortune cards. The trip back will be many deaths. You will not marry Juan. He will marry another woman. You have the evil seeds in your blood; that's the seed of the white man in your veins. It will destroy all of you."
Victoria sank into a deep whirlpool, which took her under, deeper and deeper into an abyss of unconsciousness. She remembered screaming, "Juan!" In the recesses of her mind, she could hear someone trying to talk to her. It was Ricardo, and he was saying, "You are safe in my arms. There is nothing for you to worry about. Everything is going to be all right. We'll be married as soon as you get well."
There were other women's voices. It was her mother talking in between her coughing spells.
"Mother—"
"Victoria, you are home, in your new home here in Mercedes City, and you are safe. Your father, and Roy, and Ricardo brought you and Felicia safely home to us. Look, Mamá Maria and Soledad are here to take care of you. We are all happy to see you. Por Dios, Hija!" Doña Francisca took her lace handkerchief up to her face and wiped her eyes. "This ordeal has been too much for her! For the love of God, someone gets the priest!" She went into a coughing spell sitting next to the bed and began wailing uncontrollably.
There were men's voices talking in the background. "What happened at the convent? It must have been horrible. Look how thin she is, and her feet are all bloody and swollen."
Aunt Emma, wiping her eyes with a handkerchief, appeared from nowhere and spoke from the entrance of the doorway. "Look at Felicia and how horrible she looks. The two girls are so thin—they must not have eaten anything. It's a wonder they are both alive!"
Victoria heard another voice of a woman she did not recognize. When she opened her eyes, she saw the woman had a pretty face and was dressed in black with a black lace mantilla covering her head. The woman sat next to the bed patting Victoria's hand, while she lay incoherent. Then she addressed the other worried ladies. "It took Mamá Maria and Soledad forever to clean her up. Victoria mustn't have had a bath in months, and her hair was like straw." She turned to face Victoria once again. "Everything is going to be all right now. You are safe with your mother and father. Ricardo is here, and the marriage will take place right away." Victoria discovered that it was her Grandmother Hinojosa, who had escaped the trauma in Mexico and had found her way back to Texas. She had been rescued and was now staying at the Juelson home in Mercedes City.
Victoria was cognizant enough to respond, "Felicia. Where is Felicia? Is Felicia all right? And Dan Land, is he still here and staying with us? He is so wonderful, the way he took care of us."
"Felicia is here. She is in the next bedroom and is feeling better, already eating. Dan Land is also staying here and will not leave without Felicia. I think we are going to have twin marriages," answered Mamá Maria, hovering over Victoria, patting her forehead with a cold wet cloth with her right hand and holding a cup of hot manzanilla tea in her left. "Your father doesn't want Dan to leave. He wants to reward him for taking care of you and Felicia. He has offered him some money, but the brave young man has refused. He is going to stay until Felicia gets better, and he wants you to get better also. Please drink this tea, Hija." The kindly servant put the cup on a stand next to the bed. Mamá Maria turned away, not wanting Victoria to see her tormented face. Pulling out her handkerchief, she blew her nose and went out the door, crossed herself, and whispered, "Dios mío!"
CHAPTER 24
For the next two weeks, while recovering from her hellish nightmare, Victoria tossed and turned in her elaborate, four-poster French bed. She was content to stay in her bedroom with large windows that looked out on the horizon of mesquite and cacti. She had vivid recollections of the Mexican Revolution. Francisco Madero, the President of Mexico had been killed, and now Victoriano Huerta called "The Jackal" was ruling the country. Still, Mexico was in a state of turmoil, and different factions like Carranza, Pancho Villa, and Emiliano Zapata, the pure Indian Revolutionist, who said that it was better to die on your feet than to live on your knees, were trying to take control of the country for the rights of the Indians who had been left landless under the thirty-year regime of Díaz.
Relatives living on both sides of the Rio Grande were being tremendously affected. On the Texas side of the river, the Mexican-American descendants were being stirred to rise against the injustices that were being committed against their families. Many sons and blood relatives were taking up arms and fighting against the white authorities: Los Rinches. The dreaded Texas Rangers had complete power over the Mexican-American people in the Valley and would shoot the Mexicans in the back, with the old excuse, they were trying to escape. The Mexican Revolution forcing the enormous influx of immigrants coming into Texas only exacerbated the problem.
Victoria wondered what had happened to Juan since she had last laid eyes on him in the village halfway between the convent and the outskirts of Monterrey. She had heard disturbing rumors from her father and other men talking outside the halls of the new home that he had been captured and perhaps been killed. What would have happened if she had eloped with him? Juan had given her a choice to be poor like him or come home to Texas and marry Ricardo. She remembered Juan telling her that God must have loved the poor, the innocents, the simple-minded because he made so many of them. If things had been different, if times were changed, she would have clung to Juan forever, since she
loved him so much. But she had preferred comfort, and now there was the talk of moving the wedding up as soon as possible. Ricardo had proved himself to be faithful to her throughout her unfortunate ordeal. He had not left her side, admirably, and constantly talked about marriage.
Days had passed and Victoria had still not been able to eat solid food, only teas, and soups. The thought of food was revolting and nothing seemed edible; even the smell would make her ill. She lost more weight, making the household frown with concern. She had never felt this way before, and every time she tried to get out of bed to explore the new house, she would feel faint.
Whenever anyone in the household tried to question her about what had happened in the convent, she could go to pieces and weep. How could she explain it? Recalling her evil curse on the Mother Superior, she felt flames biting at her heels, and guilt dangled over her head like a Mexican machete. She spent many waking hours staring at the contemporary, high arched glass ceiling, trying to put the pieces back together. Thoughts of Juan's torrid passion would replay over and over again during her waking hours, and he would appear so many times in her dreams. There would never be another man who could take Juan's place, and he would remain in the silence of her heart for as long as she lived.
On an early Monday morning, Manuel came, as he did every other day, in a horse wagon from Spanish Acres, bringing fresh milk, cheese, eggs, and sometimes other supplies for the family. Concerned, Mamá Maria took Victoria back to Spanish Acres. They felt that being in the hacienda would help Victoria recover faster, hoping that fresh dairy products, vegetables, and fruits would start restoring her health. And having her horse, La Reyna, would encourage Victoria to ride like she used to before she went to the convent. Felicia had recuperated very fast with the help of Dan Land, and they both decided to join Victoria in Spanish Acres, taking a separate buggy and following Manuel to the hacienda. Dan had heard of the hacienda so much that he was enthusiastic to see the cattle and the vast Juelson empire.
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