There were so many emotions rushing through his body that Tank struggled to recognize one before it was quickly replaced by another. Exhilaration, fear, panic, worry, wonder, loneliness, pain. He knew some were his emotions and others were Niles’. He couldn't turn it off, he wanted to stop feeling him, and in that moment, he’d give anything to cut the bond between them and just breathe.
He pulled over without indicating, causing the car behind to beep its horn and the driver to flip him off as he drove past. He put it into park, his head dropping onto the steering wheel, and tried to break the unfamiliar emotions swamping him.
Despair, pain, anger... Love. Tank sat up abruptly and stared out of the windshield, not seeing anything. Love. Niles loved him. He bit his fist, shaking his head, groaning deeply. Aw, shit. Niles loved him. What was he going to do now? He couldn't hurt Niles, but he couldn't be with him either. His family... Shit, his family could never find out.
He needed to talk to someone, someone who could help him. Someone who had experience.
He grabbed his cell, the phone shaking in his hand, and it took several fumbled attempts before he could unlock it and dial the number he wanted.
"Tank, man," Chester said when he answered.
"I need help," Tank muttered brokenly.
"What's wrong?" Chester demanded.
"Oh, shit, man. I've mated with Niles."
A soft chuckle greeted his comment. "Congrats, Tank. I knew—”
"No!" Tank shouted out. "This isn't time for congratulations. What the fuck am I going to do now?"
"Not again," Chester muttered. In a louder voice, he added, "Tank, listen to me, it’s time to man the fuck up. You're mated, there is nothing you can do to change that. Just think of the benefits—you'll live longer, be stronger and move faster. Remember Jared and Miguel jumping from the plane? You can do that now. You have a connection to someone who will never leave you. And, more importantly, never cheat on you."
Tank breathed raggedly, emotions—were they Niles’s—flowing over him. "I don't care! I don't want this. I can't stop feeling him. Make it stop!"
Chester sighed. "You're mated. It won't stop."
Tank hung up and contemplated throwing his cell but decided to call Ale.
As soon as he answered, Tank shouted, "How did you do it?"
"Tank? What's wrong?"
"The mating! How do you make it stop, how did you stay away from him?"
"Tank. What are you talking about?"
"Me and Niles. How do I stop our mating?"
"You don't have sex and then let him bite you?" Ale spoke like he was talking to a child, not an adult.
Tank thumped the steering wheel, screaming, "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"
"Oh, I see. Well, then congratulations, Tank, and there is no way to break the mating, sorry. I searched everywhere and there's nothing."
"Nothing!" Tank screeched. "There has to be something. I'm not gay. I can’t have a male mate."
Ale sighed. "Hate to point out the obvious, but if you've mated, you had sex with a man."
"I'm. Not. Gay," Tank screamed down the cell. "I like women, tits and pussy."
Sighing again, Ale said, "Thanks for the visual. You've had sex with Niles and you've mated. Did you get off?" Tank snapped his mouth shut. Yeah, he got off. "So, you came. You enjoyed it. What's the problem here, Tank? Is it because Niles has a dick? You obviously had no problem with said dick when you were having sex with him."
"I didn't touch him. I'm not gay."
"Dick and ass. Two men. Where do you possibly see straight here, Tank?" Ale sighed yet again. "Okay, so you're bisexual. I still don't see a problem with this."
"I'm straight! I love pussy. Pussy, Ale."
"Okay, I'm going. Lie to yourself all you want, Tank, but don't lie to me."
"Fuck, no, wait. I don't know what I'm saying."
"You're in shock, Tank. You've done something you never thought you would. How did it happen?"
Tank growled, remembering what happened. "There was a doctor at Niles' and he was kissing him. He's mine, Ale. Mine. He shouldn't have been kissing what's mine."
"Not territorial at all," Ale mused. "Nothing screams mate more than that. Look, it's done, you can't change it. I should know because I looked for a long time to break mine and Troy's. Don't screw up like I did. It will cause you both nothing but pain and misery. If you accept it, and work on it, you'll be happier than you have ever been. Trust me on that, Tank. Yes, I screwed up the beginning of my mating with Troy, but now, I wouldn't change a thing."
Wiping a hand over his face, Tank muttered, "Shit, Ale. I'm sorry."
"Nah, it's okay now. Just talk to him. He's gonna be feeling everything you are unless you shut the connection off."
"Okay. Okay."
"Now would be good, Tank."
Nodding, Tank said, “I'll do it now, and thanks, Ale."
"I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. Niles doesn't deserve that. No one does."
Tank rolled his eyes. "Okay, Ale. I'll do it now."
"Right, speak to you later."
Tank ended the call and threw his cell on the seat next to him then stared out of the windshield. His stomach rolled and churned dangerously, the bile inching up his throat, and he coughed several times, blinking rapidly trying to clear it.
He gripped the steering wheel in his hands. A cold sweat broke out over his skin, and his heart began to beat rapidly in his chest, the blood pumping through his veins. He panted, squeezing his eyes shut, his grip tightening on the steering wheel. He didn't want this mating. He didn't want to be tied to a man. He couldn't be tied to a man. He had nothing against Niles, he was a really great guy, but a male mate was not something he was looking for.
He should have known something would happen though. He could feel the bond between them, feel the connection that strummed between them. He'd ignored it for as long as he could, trying to get on with his life and move on. He should never have approached Niles in the parking lot at the hospital that night. He should never have agreed to have a meal with him. He should have simply avoided Niles at all costs and moved on with his life.
He was sure Niles would have eventually taken the hint and would have found someone else who could make him happy.
Now, there were tied together, forever, and Tank was terrified.
The repercussions if his family found out... Tank didn't want to think about it. He could already see his parents’ reactions in his mind. The fallout that would occur if they were to find out that not only was Tank with the man, but that man was a vampire. Oh, and one with darker skin than him. Yeah, his parents hated everyone who didn't look like them.
They would disown him. Tank knew with absolute certainty that his family would have nothing more to do with him were they to find out what had happened. He needed to keep quiet, tell as few people as possible. They were his family, had raised him since the day he was born, had done so much for him, sacrificed so much that he could follow his dreams.
What was he going to do? He knew Niles wouldn't want to keep it a secret. Why would he? He’d found his mate and even Tank knew how rare that was. No, Niles would want to tell everyone, and Tank needed Niles to understand that even though they were mated, that was it. He needed to talk to his mate and lay it all out, plain and simple.
Niles.
Targon.
Can we talk? Tank winced, rubbing his head as the pain began.
Come back. The food's still here. We can eat and talk.
Okay. Ten minutes.
Tank ended the connection and slumped back in his seat, his head pounding. Literally a few seconds of telepathic communication and his head felt like it was about to explode. It took several minutes before he felt like he could open his eyes and a couple more before he was able to start the car, put it into drive, and head towards Niles’ home.
The entire time he was on the road he was double guessing himself. Had he made the right decision to go to Niles? Should he be doing this
after everything that had just happened? Did he need time to adjust to the consequences of his actions?
By the time he had reached Niles, he still had no answers. He pulled to a stop and parked his truck. He sat staring at Niles who was stood at the front door, and with one last deep breath, he opened the door and stepped out.
He walked to his mate and stood in front of him. What the fuck was he going to do now?
Chapter Five
"Hungry?" Niles asked, watching Tank as he fidgeted in front of him.
"Not really," Tank muttered, shrugging his shoulders.
Nodding, Niles walked back into the house and said over his shoulder, "Come in then."
He walked into the kitchen and over to the refrigerator, pulling it open and removing two bottles. Slamming the door shut, he quickly twisted off the caps, throwing them on the counter. He handed one over to Tank, who took it, and Niles watched as Tank drank half the bottle immediately.
Tank wouldn't meet his eyes, and Niles sighed. Closing his eyes, he reached out tentatively through their bond trying to get a read on Tank's emotional state. Confusion, fear, arousal and anger. A tumult of emotions running through Tank. Each lasting a number of seconds before another emotion replaced it.
Opening his eyes, Niles took in his mate. Tall and broad, with narrow hips and long legs. Deep brown eyes and spiky blond hair, he ticked all of Niles' boxes. This was how it should be because his mate should be the perfect complement. His white skin was a beautiful contrast to his own darker skin and Niles wanted to run his hands all over it, touching and tasting.
Just looking at his mate had Niles hard and wanting. Arousal thrummed through him and he wanted nothing more than to walk over to Tank and throw him down on the table and take what was his.
"I can feel you. I can feel what you want."
Niles winced, closing the connection at his end and cutting off all his emotions. "Sorry. You're my mate, so of course I want you." He sighed, staring at the floor. "I'll try to stop you feeling it."
"I will stop... shit." Niles watched Tank pull at his hair and realized that it was something he did when he was struggling to deal with a situation. A nervous action.
"I'm sorry. I should have had more control. You don't need to feel me on top of everything else you're going through right now."
"No, if anyone's at fault, it's me. I shouldn't have gone possessive and jumped you. When I saw him... How long?" Tank eyes finally met his. "How long has it been going on for?"
Niles' mouth fell open. Seriously? He thought he was having a relationship with Max? He shook his head. "What?"
"You and him. How long have you two been fucking?"
Niles' eyebrows shot up. Tank really thought he'd been having sex with Max. "We haven't. I have a mate. Why would I cheat on my mate and ruin what we could have?"
Tank rolled his eyes. "Please. I wasn't even interested. There's nothing to stop you two fucking."
"And I repeat myself here. I have a mate. I wouldn't jeopardize that for anyone."
Tank stared at him briefly, then shrugged, and looked away. "Whatever. It doesn’t matter to me, I’m not that interested."
"Yeah, I can feel how uninterested you are. That's why I can't sit down right now," Niles countered, staring at Tank.
Tank winced, tugging on his hair again. "Shit. I'm —”
"No, you don't get to apologize. You wanted me because you couldn't stand the thought of someone else having me. You can deny our connection all you want, you feel it and you're affected by it, just like I am. We wouldn't be mates if there was no chance of us having a relationship. Lie to yourself all you want, but don't lie to me. I won't stand here and accept it. You want me, just as much as I want you. The only difference between us is I'm not afraid to admit it."
Tank stared at him. "That's the second time tonight someone has told me not to lie. I'm not lying."
Niles sighed again, leaning back on the counter. "I won't argue with you. We're mated now, and nothing is going to change that."
Tank smiled grimly. "I know," he muttered.
"So, what are you going to do about it? You know I'll need your blood from now on."
"I know."
"And it'll be hard for either of us to have sex with someone else."
Gritting his teeth, Tank repeated himself. "I know."
"If you want, we can both try to move on. Just send me your blood."
"What?"
"I'm telling you that we can both try to move on. I know you prefer women to men so I'm saying you can move on and try to build a relationship with someone else."
Tank frowned. "So, you're saying you have no problem with me going out and fucking women?"
"As long as I can go out and fuck men."
"No," Tank muttered.
Niles raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. "No?"
"That's what I said."
"What do you mean, no? I'm not going to live the rest of my life celibate."
"No one else," Tank growled. "No one but me."
Niles rolled his eyes. "All possessive again. Want me to drop my pants and bend over?”
"Fuck you."
Niles smirked. "I'd rather fuck you."
"I can't," Tank shouted.
Niles blinked, shocked at the outburst. "That didn't stop you before—”
"You don't get it, do you? I'd lose everything. This is the worst thing that could have ever happened to me."
"What? The worst thing that could have happened to you? Thanks a lot, mate."
"You don't understand, Niles. My family would disown me. If there is anything that they can have a problem with, they do. You name it. Blacks, gays, vampires. Anything that isn't white, human or middle-class they'll have a problem with." Tank pointed between the two of them, saying, "They would have a big fucking problem with this."
"Targon... I...” Niles stopped talking, shaking his head. He didn't know Tank's family was like this. "Shit, Targon. I'm all of those."
Tank’s shoulders slumped and he stared at the floor. "I'm sorry, Niles, I can't do this," he muttered brokenly.
Niles walked over to him and pulled him in, wrapping his arms around him and holding tight. "Tell me this honestly, Targon." He pulled back, but put both hands on the side of Tank's neck. Staring into his eyes, he asked, "Do you want me?"
Tank eyes flickered between his, and Niles saw him swallow before he whispered, "Yeah, I do."
"Then we start there." Slowly, so slowly, Niles leaned forward giving Tank time to pull away. When he didn't move, he kissed him, a slow slide of his lips across Tank’s. He placed small kisses across his lips and eventually Tank responded, his lips moving to meet Niles'. When Tank finally sighed into the kiss, Niles deepened it, letting his tongue lick into Tank's mouth to slide along Tank’s.
Tank tilted his head and Niles moaned, moving his hands around Tank's back and running them down over the muscles hidden by his t-shirt. Tank groaned deeply, his arms pulling Niles closer as their tongues caressed each other and Niles went willingly, desperate to feel his mate again.
They stood kissing for several minutes until Niles eventually pulled away, dropping one last final kiss on Tank’s lips. He watched Tank open his eyes, seeing the blown pupils and the flushed cheeks. He lifted his fingers and scratched the stubble on Tank’s jaw, smiling at him.
"We'll figure this out. Come, sit down and eat, and you can tell me about your family."
Tank sat at the table and watched Niles dish out the food. When it was placed in front of him, Niles said, "It's Tatws Pum Munad, or Welsh stew."
"Ah, cawl. This is my Taid, my granddad's, favorite meal."
"Taid? Ah, you're a northerner."
Tank grinned. "No way. South Wales?"
Niles nodded, chewing his food. "I say granddad, or tadcu."
"I have relatives who still live in Mundy."
"Not far from mine then. So, tell me about your family."
"What's to tell?"
Niles put hi
s spoon back in his bowl, pushing it away and staring at Tank. Tank stared down at his own bowl, fiddling with the spoon and finally sighed when he realized that he was going to have to tell Niles everything. "They are the most phobic group of people I know."
"How is that going to affect us?"
Tank shrugged, mumbling under his breath.
"I'm sorry. What was that?"
Tank pursed his lips and looked up at Niles. "There is no us, Niles."
Niles blinked, staring blankly at him and not saying a word. "We're mated," he whispered eventually.
"I'm sorry."
"But, we're mated," Niles repeated.
"Forget about it now, Niles." Tank dropped his head into his hands, shoulders slumping. "If only I'd kept control, then none of this would have happened."
"There is no forgetting about it, Targon. We’re mated. We can't change that, and it can't be broken either. We are it for each other."
"Look," Tank started as he slowly raised his head. "I did something stupid, but that doesn't have to be the end of it. You said you needed my blood, and I'll send it to you. It's just, we... we can't have a relationship."
"You just told me that you wanted me? Was that a lie?"
Tank sat back in his chair, shaking his head. "No, it wasn't, but I can't do anything about it. We need to forget this happened and move on."
"Forget it happened? Fuck you!" Niles spat out, shoving his chair back and standing up.
Tank followed, also standing up, and they both glared at each other across the kitchen table. "I know this isn't what you want to hear, Niles, but it's the best for both of us."
"Fine. Find someone else." Niles pointed at the kitchen door. "Get out."
Tank straightened. "There'll be no one else."
"No, Targon, if you don't want me, I'll find someone who does. Now get out of my house."
Tank stormed round the side of the table, grabbing Niles by the arm. "No, you're mine."
Niles shoved him away saying at the same time, "Not this again. You going all caveman is what caused this in the first place. I can't live this half-life you're expecting me to. You're either my mate, or you're not."
Rescue Inc Collection Vol 3 Page 14