Edwina turned to her brother. “Did all suit you?” she asked, in what seemed a mocking tone.
He frowned at her. “It went well,” he said curtly.
“I cannot believe it is true!” blurted out Lady Henrietta, and put her handkerchief to her eyes. “It is such a shock, you cannot mean it! It is all some terrible nightmare!”
“Henrietta!” he thundered, striding towards her, while Sonia stood still, paralysed with shock. “You will say no more!”
“I don’t care, she isn’t one of us! How could you, how could you do such a thing?” And Henrietta began to weep frantically.
Maurice took her arm. “You better be quiet. Our stern brother is scowling at you,” he said, with a grin. He had been drinking rather heavily and his voice was slurred.
“She feels deeply,” said Edwina, giving Sonia a look of scorn and dislike. “I must say, it was a great shock to all of us. What is the haste in all this? Why should you marry so soon? Think it over, Alastair, it will be evident that this is not the right solution!”
“You will all be silent,” said Alastair, in a clipped deadly tone. He had turned pale beneath the bronze of his face. “Sonia, I beg your pardon. They are overwrought, and perhaps have had too much to drink. Allow me to call your carriage for you. May I escort you home?”
She was so shaken by the unconcealed dislike of his sisters that she could scarcely speak. “No — my lord — it is — not necessary —”
Leah came forwards, Sonia’s cloak over her arm. “Our carriage is outside, Miss Sonia,” she said protectively, shooting a look of dislike and disdain towards the others. “We’ll be on our way.”
Alastair had a white line about his proud mouth. “May I call upon you tomorrow afternoon, Sonia? I will wish to apologize for the crass behaviour of my sisters and brother!”
She did not want to cause trouble between him and his family. She summoned a pallid smile. “It is not necessary. I understand,” she said gravely. “Goodnight, my lord.”
“Alastair,” he insisted.
“Goodnight, Alastair,” she said. He handed her down the steps and into her carriage, and waited until she had driven off, then returned to the lighted house.
He must have said some stern things to them, for the next time Sonia met them all were excessively polite. She could not help feeling they liked her no better, but would obey their brother’s dictates. She lay awake every night before her wedding day came, tossing and turning. Was she doing the right thing? If her uncle had not daily reassured her, she would have broken the engagement. There was too much against them; it might never work out.
Alastair sent flowers to her, and notes, and came often to see her and speak of future arrangements. He confided his troubles about his sisters. Edwina was too shy, for all her proud manner. Henrietta was inclined to frivolity, inclined also to young men who were not at all suitable. Sonia listened, hoping she might one day be wise enough to give good advice about them. It did comfort her that he confided in her.
The wedding day came, and she dressed for her marriage, with both fear and hope winging in her heart. She could scarcely speak for terror as they approached the church. There seemed to be a crowd about.
“Oh, I thought we had not invited many,” she murmured fearfully to her uncle. He patted her hand.
“Your future husband has many friends and relatives,” he told her. She turned her face from him, though it was already hidden behind the cobwebby veil.
Her friends had not come; they were holding aloof. Only Jacob and Uncle Meyer would be there. Her heart was down to her white satin shoes. Alone, friendless — how could she go through with this? Yet, when they entered the church and she saw Alastair standing tall and proud and handsome at the altar — waiting for her — she forgot all else.
She made the strange responses in a steady tone, tried to ignore the buzz of whispers behind them. She missed the bridal canopy of flowers, but flowers were set in vases all about the altar. Surely, surely, it would all work out. They were of like minds, after all, and he was kind…
The reception was more difficult, for she did not have her back to people there in Alastair’s home. No, she must face them across the room, and later in the huge dining room, with the mammoth white cake to cut… All went in a daze, of white and silver, and talking and laughing, and the buzz of gossips in which she caught words.
“Yes, yes, Jewish, isn’t it amazing! And he is a marquess! Where will they enter next? Pushing their way in — pushing — much money, I hear — money, that’s it — Wealthy family — from Vienna, speaks all kinds of foreign languages! English? Of course not, not with those looks! Dark and heathen she looks — Pretty? Well, if you like the type —”
Alastair did not show by one muscle of his face that he heard anything. Yet his hand over hers was firm and hard, unnecessarily gripping hers as she tentatively cut the cake with his dress sword. She caught the stares, the mockery in some looks. Several of the men looked her up and down in the shimmery white dress. Their eyes were not easy to meet.
She was glad, fervently glad, when it was all over, and Alastair showed her up to their apartment. He had commanded an entire suite of rooms in one wing of the house, and had had her chambers redecorated for her. All silvery blue and white, with touches of gold on the draperies and furniture, gold vases on the mantels of the fireplaces. He looked about anxiously as they entered.
“How charming,” she said spontaneously as they entered, and his anxiety eased. The rooms looked like a refuge to her. “I could not have chosen better, I will enjoy the colours here.”
He smiled down gently at her. He put his hand on her hair, and in the first intimate gesture he had made, he stroked his hand over her head to her neck, and held her closer to him. “I want you to be happy with me, Sonia. If there is aught you wish, you have but to say it.”
She wanted to say, Love me, oh, but love me — But she could not say it. She turned shyly from him, to examine the lovely rosewood table near the window. He followed her.
“I thought you could draw and sketch here,” he said. “I know you will wish one room to be your workroom for the jewellery you make. Shall you wish to bring the tools and equipment from your other house?”
She hesitated. “Oh — not just now,” she said cautiously. In the back of her mind, she was thinking of what Jacob had whispered to her this morning. “If it doesn’t work out,” he had muttered in her ear, “you can get a divorce. Father will arrange it, I know, Sonia. Don’t feel tied!”
He had been angry and resentful about her, he had argued with his father, to no avail. And he had come to her wedding in his sombre Jewish dress, with his prayer shawl, no matter how people stared and tittered at him. Dear Jacob! Kinder than any brother could have been.
“I thought we might dine upstairs tonight,” said Alastair, quietly, to her back. “It might be more comfortable for us. I am weary with all the chatter, are you not?”
She turned around, pink flushing her cheeks. “Yes, yes, I am a bit weary. But won’t — they — mind —”
He looked a bit grim. “No, they won’t. Besides, we shall please ourselves. It is our home, Sonia. I had thought in a few weeks we might retire to my country home, just the two of us. A godmother of Edwina has offered to chaperone the girls for some weeks while we get away. Shall you like that?”
“Oh — so much,” she said impulsively, her grey eyes shining.
“Good. I hoped you would like that. I must see to the estates and, besides, I think we should be alone for a time to get acquainted with each other,” he said, simply and naturally. He touched her cheek with his long fingers. “I shall change to my robe and be comfortable. I think your abigail is coming up.”
He disappeared into his rooms, and she went to hers. Leah came up soon, and helped her change from the fragile wedding gown and veil into a slim robe of white satin, with long lace sleeves to her fingertips. Leah was unusually silent that night, her face sober. Sonia scarcely noticed. She felt tremb
ly and excited inside. This was her wedding night!
They dined together, quietly, and Alastair kept the conversation going in an easy and calm way. She was grateful to him. Her hands shook when she held a cup, and the wine was cool in her throat.
Later, Leah helped her undress and put on the white silk nightdress. In the wide bed, Sonia felt lost. She had always had comfortable beds, but this was such a very large one…
Leah left her, and only a candle burned beside the bed. Sonia lay with her hands behind her head, contemplating little gilded cupids on the ceiling, and the pale blue of the sky beyond them. It was a charming scene, with garlands of rose and silver. If one might only escape to such a pretty paradise — alone…
The door opened, and Alastair came in. He wore a robe of deep blue, and his hair was wet from washing. He brushed it back with his hand. Her heart began to thump. She gazed up at him with wide luminous grey eyes, rather frightened.
He took off the robe and, in just his nightshirt, lay down beside her. He turned over easily, blew out the candle, then put his arm about her.
“It went off well, don’t you think?” he said, in such a natural tone that she wanted to giggle hysterically. She was not a giggly woman, never had been. Perhaps it was the wine. She never drank much wine, but so much had been poured today and so many toasts drunk.
“Yes, very well,” she said, in a sort of squeak.
“Sonia, you have no mother to guide you. Did some woman talk to you — about tonight?” he asked quietly, his hand smoothing gently over her body under the sheet.
She felt strangely hot and tremulous. “Yes — Leah — and Beryl did —” she whispered.
“Good. I shall be gentle, and you must be willing to tell me if I hurt you. We have our lives before us; we need not be hasty about this,” he said, and she thought he was smiling in the dimness. “You are very lovely, have I told you so?”
There was a deeper note in his voice, a caressing tone she had not heard before. It gave her some confidence. At his urging, she turned and lay against him, and felt the hard muscles of his thighs against the softness of hers. His hand moved over her back, down to her hips, and drew her closer yet.
He moved his lips against her cheek, then to her mouth, held it in a long kiss. She felt she melted against him, and when he indicated how her arms should entwine around him, she complied. One did obey one’s husband, she thought, in a daze. And she wanted to — she felt excited, curious, wondering. He kissed her again, and her lips moved in response.
“How sweet you are! Your perfume is so light, yet so pretty. Is it lilac?” he murmured against her neck.
“Ummm,” she said, unable to think. He chuckled softly and the sound rippled through her body.
He murmured to her, his hands stroked over her body, his lips kept on finding warm places to caress. He opened her nightdress and kissed down to her breasts. She caught her breath sharply as he took a nipple in his lips and pulled gently at it. Her hands went to his head, and she dared to move her fingers through the thick blond curly hair. How silky it was, slightly damp, curling to his strong neck.
She would have been content to remain like this. However, he seemed to have other ideas. His kisses grew more urgent, he turned her on her back, and lay over her, drawing back the silk of the nightdress, until she was bare beneath him. His hand moved more intimately over her. She gasped again and again. His fingers — how they thrilled her! Leah had told her what would happen, and so had Beryl, but somehow she had not thought her heart would pound so, and her thighs burn, and the whole of her melt against him.
When he brought the two of them together — slowly, carefully — she felt some pain. But she would not have stopped him for the world. For long moments, she felt part of him, a vital part of his body. It was dangerously exciting. When he drew back cautiously, she could have wept. She clung to his hard shoulders.
“Far enough for tonight,” he whispered. “Have I hurt you, my darling?” He sounded anxious.
“It hurt a little — I don’t mind —” she said honestly.
He got up, brought a towel wrung out in cool water, and washed her carefully. If there had been a light, she would have blushed and resented it, but in the darkness — his hands felt gentle and tender and she did not mind. She adored him for his care.
“There, now you will sleep,” he said. He put the towel in the bathroom. She thought he would go to his own room, and felt disappointment.
Instead, he returned to her bed and lay there, holding her in his arms against his hard body. He did not sleep for a time, seeming restless, moving in the bed.
But Sonia was happy, her head was on his shoulder, and his hand was on her back. She went to sleep in his arms. He was there when she wakened once in the night. He slept deeply, his arm still about her. In the morning, he was still there.
She opened her eyes, saw his face beside hers on the pillow. They gazed gravely into each other’s eyes. Then he began to smile. “Good morning, my wife,” he saluted her.
She flushed, and put her hand to brush back her hair, loosened in the night. He stopped her.
“Let me play with your hair. I love it all down like that,” he said, and his hand moved in the long curly dark strands. “It is almost to your waist,” he marvelled.
He moved over her to kiss her again, and his caresses became more passionate. The wind blew in, flowing curtains drifted from the windows. They seemed alone in a world of silence.
Her arms went about him. He pressed his face to her breasts, murmured, “Sonia, I want you badly. Will you mind —”
“Please — do what you wish,” she whispered lovingly. His kisses grew more ardent, burning against her, and his body moved urgently against hers.
He was more direct this morning. Her body felt warm and yielding. She did not mind it when he entered her. He thrust again, again, then his whole physical being shuddered in hers, and she felt the sweet release of his passion.
“Have I hurt you?” was his first question, as he regained his breath.
“No, no, you did not hurt me,” she reassured him. Her hand moved slowly, exploring, along his hard back, to the muscles there and the lean spine.
“Oh, you are a darling, you are so sweet,” he whispered. He lay back, holding her to him, and she felt the final shudder sweep through him. He seemed relaxed and happy. She smiled against his chest. She had made him happy! Somehow she knew it, and it made her feel bold and confident. His hand was moving through her hair, stroking over her bare shoulder. They lay in lazy contentment.
After that first night, Alastair came to her room every night. Sometimes he kissed her and made love fiercely, sometimes he held her gently and caressed her for a time before they slept. But she made him happy, she felt sure of it, and the knowledge kept her going through the difficult days. At least at nights he belonged to her!
The housekeeper resented her, and kept going to Edwina for orders. The girls were proud and aloof, watching with reproachful eyes as she tried tactfully to take over. Alastair wished it — he had said so — but sometimes she could have cried as she tried to draw up the meals, direct the servants, plan for a dinner.
They gave their first party as man and wife. Sonia was anxious for it to go very well. In her pride, she may have overdone it, she thought later. But she wanted him to be proud of her!
She chose a cloth-of-gold dress, trimmed in mink, with topaz jewels at her throat and wrist and in her small ears. As she descended the stairs that night, with Alastair following her down in his blue satin and silver trim, she felt proud, confident, her head erect. She was his wife, and she belonged to him. He had chosen her.
Edwina and Henrietta came down soon after. Gasping, they stared at their new sister-in-law. “Sonia, you look — stunning!” whispered Henrietta, her violet eyes wide. “I never saw — such a glorious gown, and your jewels —”
“Thank you, Lady Henrietta,” said Sonia, with composure.
Edwina was more moderate, but her blue eyes gl
eamed at the sight of the jewels and the mink. She was beautifully gowned in blue silk, with a modest silver chain and pearl pendant. “You do look fine, Sonia,” she said.
Alastair interrupted their talk. “You must begin to call my sisters by their first names, without the lady before it,” he said to Sonia. “We shall have no more formality within the family. Eh? That is only right. They are your sisters now.”
Sonia glanced hopefully at the two girls, only to be chilled by their cold looks. Maurice soon came down, clattering down the stairs, dashing in his pale blue and gold. His mouth dropped open as he saw Sonia.
“I say — you look like a queen,” he said frankly. Alastair smiled proudly at Sonia.
“You do me proud,” he said simply, and she was satisfied with that. No matter what else everyone thought and said, if Alastair was satisfied with her, she must be happy. She turned to greet their first guests, her hand on Alastair’s arm.
CHAPTER 7
December had scarcely begun when Alastair removed to the country. Sonia was glad to go with him. His sisters remained cold and aloof, carefully polite, but no more. She was happy to get away, to be alone with Alastair.
Their carriages rattled cheerfully along the country roads, some white-glazed with ice. The leaves had fallen from the trees; only the evergreens stood tall and stately with dark green limbs erect. An ice storm had swept through the Cornwall area, leaving some devastation.
Alastair watched the country with absorbed interest as they rode, growing more cheerful as they approached his estates. He pointed out places to her on the last day of their journey.
“There — there is the farm where I first helped with the haying. There is the school my father had built for the children of our estate workers. There — now you can see the spire of the church in our village. Oh, look, you can see the manor house on the hill. See it there, against the blue?”
She looked with even more eagerness than he, delighted that he was sharing his childhood, his life story, with her. They rolled up the winding hill, the horses straining, and entered the smooth area before the manor house. She caught her breath at the sight of it.
Star Sapphire: Love and wild adventure in Regency England Page 8