She frowns. “I don’t see why.”
“Do I quit or do I continue to work for him? I’m afraid of being hurt, Deb.”
Her frown thickens. “Why do you think he’ll hurt you? From what I heard of Clause, he doesn’t date his employees. You’re the first.” She shrugs. “Unless those others were in secret, but I don’t think so as it would have gotten out.” She reaches out and takes my hand on the counter. “Just because Terrance hurt you doesn’t mean every man is out to do the same.”
I shake my head. “It’s not that simple, Deb. There’s another woman.”
“What?”
I tell her about Katherine and why I feel insecure about her.
My sister frowns. “You know Christian won’t purposely hurt you, right?”
I shrug.
Her eyes narrow. “Did something happen between you two after the trip?”
“Sort of, but it’s complicated.” I release a weary sigh. “I think there’s more between him and Katherine than he’s telling me. I found her all over him in his office. And they went out together again today.”
Debra scoffs. “Fuck Katherine. I don’t see the problem. Christian is single and you are single, so what’s stopping you from telling him how you really feel about him?”
My lips part with surprise for a moment until I remember my sister had taken the bull by the horns and told Ray her feelings before he did.
I don’t think I’m that brave. Lowering my head, I whisper, “I don’t want to be rejected.”
“Oh, Hope.”
“I don’t want a repeat of what happened with Terrance,” I truthfully admit.
Debra squeezes my hand. “I understand, but please stop doubting yourself, Hope. What makes you think Christian will reject you?”
I don’t know why I suddenly become teary-eyed. Meeting Christian and falling in love with him has turned me maudlin.
“You’re beautiful, smart, and classy,” Deb tells me with a bright smile on her face. Then she whistles. “And you’ve got a body I wish I had. You’re thick in all the right places.”
I smile through my tears. Debra has always wished she had my curvy figure.
Shaking my hand, she says, “I’m not just saying all this because you’re my baby sis. It’s the truth. You’re a strong, gorgeous woman any man would be proud to call his own.”
“Thank you,” I reply, feeling my face flush. I have never learned to do well with flattery.
“Tomorrow, when you get to the office, lay your cards on the table. Tell him no more sneaking around. If he wants to date you, he has to do it publicly. And you need to know if this Katherine will be in his life forever. If she is, then a line needs to be drawn about her touching him. However, don’t make him choose between his so-called old friend and you. Men don’t like that.”
I nod, happy to have finally shared my misgivings with her. I’m so relieved I rise and go around the counter to throw my arms around her.
Pulling away, I smile. “I’m so sorry for not telling you what was going on with Christian.”
She chuckles. “You think I didn’t know?”
Laughter rumbles from my throat. “I was afraid you would frown at me dating my boss.”
Debra smiles. “Why would I do that when I see the effect Christian has on you? You came back to Cedar Crest looking as if your world has crumbled. About a week into working with Christian, your whole demeanor changed. It was as if you finally had a purpose in life again. And then you started glowing and didn’t want to say anything. So, I knew something was going on.”
I laugh again. I should have known better than trying to hide things from Debra.
“Thank you for everything, Deb. If you hadn’t invited me to come back here, I would have still been in Georgia feeling sorry for myself.”
Winking at me, Debra says, “What would you do without me?”
I throw my arms around her again. “Absolutely nothing.”
We laugh together and I tell her about the conference and how much I enjoyed myself with Christian.
“All will be fine,” she tells me, and I believe her.
“Merry Christmas, Deb.”
“Merry Christmas, Hope.”
Chapter Twenty
Christian
“Would you like to come in?” Katherine asks me as I pull into her driveway.
I shake my head. “I have made other plans.”
“Oh, come in, Chris. We’ve got to celebrate. I have my business back successfully, all thanks to you. I have champagne and caviar.”
I smile. “I’m sorry, Katherine. I have to be somewhere else.”
Her delicately carved brows shoot up. “Where else could you possibly go on an evening like this instead of spending it with me?”
I don’t think it is any of her business, so I keep quiet. I wish she’d just exit the car. The snow is beginning to build up, and I want to get the hell out of there.
“Chris,” Katherine purrs and I inwardly groan. I don’t have time for this. “You and I have known each other for a long time now. I want you to know that I care a lot about you.”
No! I can’t do this. Not tonight.
Before I can tell her I’m not interested in hearing what she has to say as I have to leave, Katherine leans into me from the passenger seat and tries to kiss me. Hastily, I pull back.
“What do you think you’re doing?” My voice is tinged with fury.
Katherine, her face reddened, sits back and lowers her head. “I’m just trying to show you how I feel.”
I grit my teeth as I regret not telling her off when she unexpectedly tried to kiss me in my office a short while ago. So, now she thinks I’m available for her to grab and try to kiss every time? It’s shocking as she has never been this bold and needy in the past.
“Katherine, I’m in love with someone,” I quietly say into the thick silence that follows her admission.
She gasps and twists in her seat. “What did you just say?”
“I’ve fallen in love with Hope.”
Her shriek resounds in the car, drowning out the quietly playing Christmas carol on my speaker.
“Your PA?”
I nod. “She’s more than just a PA to me.”
Katherine stares at me as if I’ve gone crazy.
With a solemn voice, I say, “Katherine, we can no longer have secrets between us. I hurt Hope the other day because I didn’t want to tell her why she has been seeing us together. I love her, and I’m secretly dating her. So, I can’t lie to her and keep things from her. I also don’t want you to come between us.”
Katherine looks at me with eyes of betrayal. I’m not moved by them because I never promised her anything. All I promised to do was to help her. I never planned on having an affair with her.
“I can’t believe what I’m hearing,” she finally says in a strangled tone.
I shrug. “Hope is the number one priority in my life right now, and I won’t do anything to jeopardize having a successful relationship with her.”
“But how can you fall in love with your PA, Chris? You told me your work ethics don’t allow that. You’ve fired countless women who came on strongly to you in the past. Why Hope? Why now?”
A smile curls my lips. “Because Hope is different. She’s everything I want in a woman. She’s all I’ve been seeking for in a woman.”
“But I thought you and I could have something going after helping me. I thought we made the perfect fit. I thought we had a future together as we’ve known each other for so long.”
I hear the pain in her voice and I grimace. I don’t like hurting women, but in this case, I can’t help it.
Turning to regard her with rueful eyes, I sigh. “I’m sorry, Katherine. You and I will always be good friends, nothing more.”
She sniffs and I feel terrible. I reach into my jacket and offer her my handkerchief. I didn’t know her feelings for me ran so deep. My friends told me she put green lights out for me, but I didn’t see any of them because I had
eyes only for Hope.
“Are you going to be okay?” I question as she dabs at her eyes with my handkerchief.
She nods. “I’ll be fine. Forgive me for being silly.” She laughs a little. “I can’t recall the last time I cried over a man.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I understand. Hope is a lucky woman. I wish you well, Chris.”
“Thanks, Katherine. That means a lot to me.”
She smiles and says, “I’m always here, I’ll always be here waiting for you in case it doesn’t work out between you and her.”
“Katherine—”
She vigorously shakes her head. “I know how love is, trust me. One minute you’re all over the person and the next, you can’t stand the person. So, in case that happens with you and Hope, I’ll be right here waiting for you.”
I release a tired breath. Katherine isn’t making it easy for me and herself. I have to spell things out bluntly to her.
“Katherine, I’m sorry, but nothing can happen between the two of us. Having known each other since high school, we would have been a couple by now.”
“I understand,” she replies in a small voice.
“Now that our business is concluded and we have no further dealings, I don’t think we should see so much of each other again.”
She nods without saying anything.
“I want to focus on my relationship with Hope and see where it leads.”
“That’s fine.” She smiles a little. “I’ll miss hanging out with you, but I understand. If you were my man, I wouldn’t want another woman flocking around you either.”
“Thanks for understanding.”
She leans in and places a kiss on my cheek. “Goodbye, Chris.”
I watch as she tightens her mink coat around her body and leaves the car. She waves at me when she gets to her front door. I nod at her and drive out of her driveway, feeling as if the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders.
As I drive down the street flagged by houses decorated with Christmas lights, the snow falling, Silent Night playing on my radio, and thoughts of Hope filling my mind, I decide Christmas is my favorite time of the year.
Chapter Twenty-One
Hope
“I think the kitchen is squeaky clean now, Deb,” I tell my sister as I wipe my hands on the drying cloth.
Debra smiles at me from the counter she’s cleaning in circular motions. “That was therapeutic.”
“It sure was,” I hastily concur.
After talking about Chris, Debra and I reminisced about the good old days. We talked about our late parents and our childhood. As we talked, we moved around the kitchen, cleaning it like we used to do with our mom. It’s a few days to Christmas, and it’s custom to turn the place inside out to prepare for all the cooking that will be done on Christmas day.
I go to my sister and give her a big hug. “Thanks, Deb. I sure needed that.”
She smiles and kisses my cheek.
I put the kettle on the gas to have a cup of hot cocoa before I go to bed. Ray comes into the kitchen.
“Someone is here to see you, Hope,” he says with a smile.
A frown marks my forehead. Who is visiting at this time of the night?
Ray sees the question in my eyes and says, “It’s Clause.”
My eyes widen and my lips part. “What?”
Ray nods. “He’s in the living room.”
I just stand there in shock for some minutes, wondering why Christian is here.
“Please bring him to the kitchen,” Debra inserts before I can get my vocal cords working. “My kitchen is squeaky clean and cozy. They’ll have a wonderful time discussing things while you and I snuggle in bed.” She winks at Ray, who bursts into laughter.
They both turn to look at me.
“Hope?”
I sigh. Why not? I needed privacy for what I had to say to Christian.
“Okay.”
They smile and hold hands as they exit the kitchen. I wish for what they have and more with Christian.
My heart is in my throat as I take the kettle from the gas and quickly make two cups of hot cocoa. I take a packet of marshmallows from the cupboard. I turn around and Christian is at the kitchen entrance, looking as handsome as ever in a gray turtleneck sweater, a black jacket, and black jeans.
The marshmallows fall from my hands. “Christian.”
A slow smile covers his face. He nods at the kitchen. “This is lovely.”
I look around the kitchen decorated with white and red bows, with small flower vases at the windows. Yes, it is indeed a cozy scene for two lovers to rub minds.
“Thanks,” I reply, for want of anything better to say.
I pick up the marshmallows and point at the cups of cocoa on the counter.
“Do you want some?”
He nods and strides forward to sit on a stool by the counter.
I put some marshmallows in his cup and mine. We sit there sipping our hot drink in companionable silence for some minutes. It stretches my nerves taut.
At last, Christian says, “We have to talk, Hope.”
My heart slams painfully in my chest. My hands tremble as I put my cup back on the counter. I force my eyes to meet his. I’m lost for words as an expression I can’t describe reflects in his eyes.
Christian rises and my eyes enlarge as he walks around the counter. He gently takes my hands and lifts me from the stool.
“Hope, I love you.”
My lips part with shock. Christian’s hands tighten around my body.
“I don’t want to sneak around anymore. I want the entire world to know I love you and you’re my woman.”
I can’t believe my ears. All I do is gawk at him, not knowing what to say. I secretly feared that all he wants from me is sex. Joy wells up inside me, causing tears to sting my eyes.
“Do you really mean that?”
He smiles and nods. “I mean every word. I see you being my wife and the mother of my children.”
“Oh, Christian,” is all I can say as tears of elation spill down my cheeks.
He wipes my tears with his hands and captures my lips with his in a stunning kiss. I drown as his lips move expertly against mine.
And then, like a bolt of lightning striking me, I remember what had made me indecisive all day. I wrench my lips from his.
“What about Katherine?”
He frowns. “What about her?”
I take a step back. “You left the office with her today and as usual, she was all over you.”
Christian runs his hands through his hair. “Sweetheart, Katherine is an old friend. We met in high school and lost contact until after college. I have never dated her and I don’t have any intention of doing that.”
My eyes narrow. “Then why have you been seeing her if nothing is going on between the two of you?”
“She had a problem with her business. She was almost at the point of bankruptcy, but she didn’t want anyone to know. So, she asked for my help. With a few investments and investors here and there, she’s back on her feet again.”
I chew my bottom lip, looking at him with skepticism. I don’t want what happened with Terrance to happen again. Christian might wake up someday and tell me he’s going back to Katherine.
Christian places his hands on my shoulders. “Hope, darling, I know you’ll find it hard to believe me because of Terrance.”
During the night we spent making passionate love in Gray Rock, we talked for a long time about our lives and past relationships. He didn’t mention Katherine that night, but I kept wondering as the woman was still in his life.
He cups my cheek. “I promise you, Katherine and I are just friends. True, she wanted something other than friendship, but I have made it clear to her that it will never be because I love you and want to be with you.”
His head descends and he renders me breathless again. I’m smiling like a ninny when he raises his head. I clasp his face in my hands and laugh joyously.
�
�I love you, Christian.”
His eyes widen. Then he shakes his head. “You don’t have to say it because I did.”
I laugh heartily. “Now you doubt me?”
He looks so cute in his uncertainty; I kiss him.
“I fought real hard not to fall in love with you, but I failed woefully.”
He chuckles. “Me, too.”
“I have been so frightened that you’d break my heart and leave it in tatters. I thought all you wanted from me was sex.”
Christian throws back his head as laughter rumbles from his throat.
“I started with wanting only that, but I knew instinctively that you were different. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. When I kissed you for the first time, it became worse. You were in my mind, my heart, and my dreams. Everywhere I went, I saw you. For the first time since I started my business, I found something better I wanted to do.”
I can’t stop smiling.
“To make it official, I have to ask. Will you be mine from now till eternity, Hope?”
I nod with a wide smile on my face. “Forever and always.”
Epilogue
Two Years Later
Hope
“You’re so adorable,” I coo at my month-old baby son as I gently place him in his cradle.
His smile, so identical to his dad’s, melts my heart yet again. I curl his small hand around my finger. He’s the replica of his dad, with blonde hair, silver eyes, and the promise of handsome features when he’s older. The only thing my son took from me is my nose and my natural tan color.
I sing to him, still amazed that I’m the mother of such a wonderful son. And the wife of Christian Clause. As I think of my husband, my face brightens with joy.
Two years ago, Christian and I tied the knot in a beautiful Christmas wedding. Surrounded by family and friends, the event was glorious. Christmas has never been the same for us after that. It has become even more special as we not only celebrate finding each other and our love, but our wedding and now the birth of our son. I feel so blessed and happy; I find it hard to believe sometimes.
Christian Clause: A BWWM Holiday Romance Page 11