Lady Kelsey looked down. Tears brimmed her lashes. She seemed to forget that she had a firm grip on each son, that they were watching their mother fall apart. “I didn’t start this. Lord Kelsey did. I simply inherited it after his death.” She looked at Pia. “The world is not easy for women. I couldn’t work like you do. I’m not smart enough.”
Pia frowned. The excuse was distasteful.
Lady Kelsey looked past her and straightened before turning to Pia. “Please. Tell him I love my family. I love my boys. I’ll do anything he wants.”
“What does this have to do with your boys?” Now Pia was confused. “What do you mean?”
“They’re mine,” Kelsey said as she possessively pulled her sons closer. The eldest looked startled. The younger began to weep.
Lady Kelsey turned to a footman and waved him over. “Take the boys to the carriage. Don’t let them out of your sight.” The younger didn’t want to leave, but he did. Then the women were alone. “I won’t give them up.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“My son,” Lady Kelsey whispered. “Surely, you know what your husband’s friend has decreed?”
Decreed?
Pia looked toward Sirius. He stood in the center of the lake and simply stared at them. All black against the white of winter, he was an ominous figure.
“They’re taking the firstborn sons,” Lady Kelsey croaked.
Pia’s head whipped back to her. “What?” Her heart tripled its usual rhythm.
Lady Kelsey nodded. “Didn’t you know?” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “They’ve already started. All shall pay.”
Pia shook her head. “Sirius wouldn’t do this. Neither would Cassius. They are trying to help young boys.”
“Only the poor ones.” Lady Kelsey looked defeated. “They took Lord Mullon’s son. Two others as well, I heard.”
“No.” Pia refused to believe her. “I’ve been with Sirius for days. There would have been no time—”
“Mullon told me himself,” Lady Kelsey cried. “He’s here, warning everyone.” She placed a hand on her throat as she looked at Sirius. “Does he know of my involvement? Does he…” Her voice trailed off as she looked at Pia. “You told him our names, didn’t you?”
“I didn’t know what you’d done,” Pia said. “I’d have never guessed it of you.”
Lady Kelsey nodded in understanding. “A few years ago, I’d have not expected it of me either, but my crops no longer make what they used to. I needed the money.”
Pia looked Lady Kelsey over and took in her fine clothes. Her furs were a rich sable gold. “No, you didn’t, not if it meant others who’d barely lived would have to die for it.” And because she hurt on behalf of all the boys who’d died in those fights she said, “You might as well be wearing their skins for all the consideration you had for the sons of so many others.”
Lady Kelsey broke into tears. “I’m… please forgive me. Tell him I’ll do anything. Anything the duke wants. I will be his most loyal of servants.” Then she started away and Pia jumped when a hand touched her lower back.
“Did she beg you for her life?” he asked.
Pia turned to him. “Not in a hundred years would I have guessed Lady Kelsey involved in such a scheme.”
Sirius’ eyes said he expected otherwise. “She likely didn’t attend a single match. It’s easier to simply reap the benefits of a cruel thing if you don’t know the details.”
“Will you have mercy on her?”
“What did she promise?” he asked.
“Anything.” Pia touched his chest. “You didn’t take Mullon’s firstborn son, did you?”
“No.”
Pia patted his chest. “I knew she was wrong.”
Sirius took her hand and started them toward a bench. “I’ll visit Lady Kelsey and see what she can offer the duke.”
“I couldn’t do what you do,” Pia said as she sat down. One of their footmen came over to assist, but Sirius waved him away and got down on his knees in the snow to untie his wife’s skates. “Think of it this way.” He paused with her foot in his hand. “You’re not a lady, and I’m not a lord. Instead, I’m a blacksmith, and you’re a blacksmith’s wife.”
She nodded and smiled as she imagined the ridiculousness of the tale.
He grinned. “We have a son. We named him… Adam.”
Her heart constricted. It was exactly what she wanted to name their son if they had one. She wondered how Sirius would feel about that.
She hadn’t thought of Adam in some time, though now when she did, it was only with an old sort of fondness. What she felt for Sirius was the affection of a grown woman.
She likely loved him, but she wasn’t sure. Or rather, her love frightened her much like he did. Those eyes could be so soulful and then so cold.
“Adam always wanted to be a sailor.”
“No, he didn’t,” Pia countered. “He wanted to be a soldier.” She remembered that.
Sirius tilted his head and squeezed her ankle. “I’m talking about our son.”
“Oh.” Her cheeks heated. “You should hurry with my boot. I’m getting cold.”
“You’re not that cold.” He stroked her ankle lightly, and Pia lost all her breath and was awash with desire.
She narrowed her eyes. “Lord Gordie, we are in a public park. You’re not to fondle your wife where others might see.”
Sirius looked around and then his warm eyes returned to her. “Ah, but I’m a blacksmith. We’ve been known to do as we please.” His hands didn’t move again, but by now, Pia didn’t need them to. She could imagine it all on her own.
A footman brought her chocolate to drink and she thanked him. “Continue your story.”
He took off her blade and then the other and stood. “Adam wanted to be a sailor.” He sat next to her and got to work on his own skates. “So, when he was fourteen, we allowed him to go work on a boat.”
“We did?” she asked.
“Mm.” He gave their skates to a servant and then turned to her. His hand went to the back of the bench. “He wrote us about his many adventures. He loved the sea. From his missives, we could taste the salt in the air and feel the warmth of a bright sun.”
Pia closed her eyes and smiled, imagining it.
“Then one day, he was gone.”
Her eyes popped open, and her heart fell. “Why?”
“He died.” His visage lacked compassion.
“Did he drown?” she asked.
“No. Instead, the captain thought it would a good idea to put our boy in a fight. Why not? If he managed to walk away from the match, there would be gold for all, but should he fail….” Sirius shrugged. “There were men to make it so we believed he’d drowned, but that would never be the truth.”
“Wait,” Pia said. “I thought it was only orphans in the fights.”
Sirius shook his head. “Nick fought.”
“Nick? Your friend Lord Nicholas? He fought?”
Sirius nodded. “Children are weak. Most of them are too foolish to make good decisions. It’s why they have parents to begin with. They need someone to take care of them or they die.”
Pia pressed a hand into his thigh. Her eyes stung. “Adalina and Babbette are the luckiest girls in the world.”
He stood and pulled her up with him. “Our Adam was a victim to a man who thought he could abuse him, kill him, and suffer no consequence. Tell me, Pia, should that man go unpunished? Do you not wish to avenge our son’s death?”
“Won’t God punish them?”
“Am I not my brother’s keeper?” Sirius said. “There are those who would like us to believe that man is not responsible for the others around us. I say, not so. We have a responsibility to everyone around us, especially if we are stronger.” He grunted. “I’m not perfect. I’m aware of my shortcomings, but… this issue matters a great deal to me. It also matters to Cassius and Nicholas.”
He was right, she supposed. If people continued to allow everyone e
lse to do as they pleased, the world would fall into chaos. The innocent would suffer far worse than most. There had to be law and order and then there had to be something more when law and order failed so many.
Sirius was part of that, as were the duke and the men who fought with him.
She’d delivered at least twelve porcelain animals since Cassius became the duke. There were at least twelve men who made the Duke of Van Dero the powerful man he was.
It seemed so real, the death of their son Adam. Sirius had chosen the name wisely. It pulled her in. He’d painted such an amazing portrait before her eyes. “How did you become so good at storytelling?”
He tapped her under the chin. “I found it to be a clever way to threaten people. I’d walk them through what I’d do to them before I did it. It also produced the greatest amount of fear.”
Pia glared at him.
He tapped her again. “Another shortcoming. You asked. I won’t lie.”
“Well, at least there is that. The truth.” She wondered how Milly dealt with it all. She’d have to ask the woman the next time they were in the same room.
He smiled. “Come. Let’s go home so I can get you warm.”
She was already warm and was sure by the time she got home, she’d be hot.
∫ ∫ ∫
4 0
* * *
“Warm?” Sirius stroked Pia’s hair as it rested on her pillow. Her back was to him. He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear and then kissed the shell.
A soft quake went through her, and he felt it in every part of himself.
Her voice was heavy but came at a whisper. “I never would have imagined it could be this way. I see why my aunt is so wild for it.”
“Sex?” He wrapped his arm around her.
“Yes.” She pulled his arm tighter, tugging him closer, forcing him against her moist back. With her sweet bottom in his lap, no position had ever felt better.
She tucked his hand under her head and sighed deeply. “Perhaps, she was right. Perhaps, I should have tried this before.” She broke into a fit of laughter when Sirius snatched his hand back and began to tickle her exposed belly.
She turned around tried to catch his hands. Her face, the glow, the twinkle in her eyes, this moment had been worth every sorrowful day in his life. If he’d have had to go through another decade of feeling alone and unanchored, he’d have done so gladly if he knew she waited for him.
Pia.
How was it possible that she was here, smiling at him?
His heart tugged in her direction and his mouth felt heavy with the need to tell her the truth. He was Adam. He was her Adam. They were finally together.
But how would she react once she learned the truth? Once she realized he’d been lying to her about a very important thing?
Until they found her aunt, he wasn’t even sure how much he could trust her.
He stopped tickling her and rested his hand on her belly. “Did Lady Kelsey tell you where your aunt was hiding?”
Pia stilled. “Not here.”
“What?”
She shook her head. “You’re always working. I don’t want you working here. Please. Not in bed.” She placed a hand on his shoulder and moved closer to him. “I want only us here. No one else. No Lady Kelsey. No Cassius. No collecting.”
“All right,” he said, seeing that she was growing troubled. “No work.” Though he had no idea how he would do that. He was always working. His mind constantly enumerated every detail in his life.
“I’m feeling cold,” Pia said, pressing her soft body against him. “Warm me.”
He knew what she was doing.
He allowed it. He honestly had little choice. She was asking to be warmed, but she had no clue how much she warmed him. He was hot where he’d once been cold inside. He loved his daughters, but this was different. There was nothing he could compare it to.
∫ ∫ ∫
4 1
* * *
Pia woke sometime later. The sky was still dark. The fire burned brightly, which meant a servant had been in to see to the flames. She looked down at Sirius and slowly pulled back the sheets.
His torso was the most impressive she’d ever seen off a statue, yet she rarely had time to examine him as Sirius moved around her, over her… in her. Her mind always focused on one thing while he was awake and then it lost focus altogether.
She ran her fingers just over his skin, making sure to not actually touch him, only the soft hair. Blond. Bright. She’d have missed them if she hadn’t felt him. They were abrasive to her body, and she loved it.
But was it right for his head to be one shade and his body completely different? She wasn’t sure. She looked at his well-toned arms and even farther down. Blond. Everywhere.
If Pia didn’t know better, she’d think Sirius dyed his hair. It wasn’t hard to do. She searched his head for even a hint of blond but found nothing. Even his brows and lashes were a perfect black. She leaned forward and sniffed, wondering if it was only in her mind that she smelled something strange underneath the dark fragrance he covered his body in.
When she pulled away, Sirius was watching her.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head. “Nothing. I’ve just… only ever seen one other male body before yours. I wished to examine you.”
He grinned. “How do I compare?”
There was no comparison. Ginter had been a small man, Pia’s own height, and likely weighed less than her, but she refused to help elevate her husband’s already larger than usual self-importance.
So instead of answering, she tilted her head and narrowed her gaze.
Sirius picked her up, and Pia gave a shout as she went through the air. He held her up with nothing but his hands. Then with great care, he set her down on top of him. Before he could speak, there was a knock on the door.
Sirius put Pia down, and she quickly covered herself before a maid came in.
“You told me to alert you when your family came in, my lord. They are awake. Shall I direct Lady Adalina and Lady Babbette to their rooms?”
Sirius had been hesitant about allowing the girls to come to London given the circumstances. He’d written them and his mother had replied. Georgiana insisted they needed to congratulate their parents on the marriage and Sirius had not refused.
He turned to Pia. “Shall we go greet them or do you wish to wait until morning?”
Nervousness ran amuck over her heart, but she said, “We should greet them now.”
They dressed and went downstairs.
Gillian and her children had come as well. All seemed happy, but no one more than Adalina and Babbette. They hugged Pia and then presented her with a gift. A pale pink handkerchief with yellow and green needlework. There were small flowers in the corner. The design was not elaborate, nor was it the finest work, but Pia had never seen anything more beautiful.
“Aunt Milly is teaching us,” Babbette said. “We started before we knew you would become our mama.”
“We wanted to thank you for teaching us pottery,” Adalina added.
Pia’s tears could not be held back as she looked at her wonderful gift. She was forced to use it immediately, which made the girls very happy. “I’m certain I’m the happiest mama in all of England right now and truly the most blessed.” She kissed the girls and gave them tight squeezes before Sirius grabbed their attention and lavished them with his love and promises of a wonderful day of sledding tomorrow.
Adalina gasped. Her large brown eyes widened. “Oh, Papa, truly? You mean you don’t have to work tomorrow?”
He colored. Sirius was the only man she’d ever seen blush, and she thought it the most adorable thing in the world. “I will be entirely yours tomorrow, my dear.”
The girls jumped with excitement, but then Georgiana insisted it was time for bed.
“Can Madam Belle come?” Babbette asked.
Sirius lifted his chin in consideration and then dropped it. “I will consider it.”
There was more excitement, as though Sirius’ words were an affirmation.
Their governess, Mrs. Jamison, took them to their rooms.
Pia was excited as well. The last time she’d gone sledding was the winter before Adam left.
She remembered wrapping her arms around him and closing her eyes. In those times, she wished the hill would never end. She’d wanted to slide forever, hold Adam forever.
Now she would hold Sirius. She looked at him and found him watching her. She wondered if he could guess at her thoughts.
“Have you gone sledding before?” His mind was sharper than most.
She nodded. “Yes, but I haven’t for many years.”
“We’ll have a wonderful time.”
She agreed and was anxious to make memories with her husband. “Who is Madam Belle?”
“A friend,” Sirius said. “You’ll meet her tomorrow.”
It wasn’t the first time she’d heard the name. Babbette mentioned the woman often but never enough for Pia to know how they were acquainted with her. Adalina usually ended such conversations quickly.
Gillian kissed her, distracting her, before she took her children to their room and then only Georgiana remained.
“The Lord has given me my heart’s desire by making you my daughter.” The woman’s hug broke Pia’s heart. She clung to Georgiana tighter than she thought she should and didn’t want to let go. She’d missed Georgiana’s tenderness. No one had ever been so gentle with her. Not even Aunt Melody.
Right then and there, Pia wanted nothing more than to curl into Georgiana’s lap and allow the rest of the world to fade. She was happy in her marriage, but she was dealing with so much. She worried for her aunt. She worried for her husband as well. Surely, this woman who’d lived with Sirius for the last ten years or more would know more.
But deciding she would speak to her later, she pulled away and said goodnight.
Before Georgiana left, she delivered a message. “I hate to ruin such a happy day, but we saw your father and mother on the road. They are heading in this direction as well.”
The Secret Pleasures of an Earl: (The Valiant Love Regency Romance) (A Historical Romance Book) Page 20