Somehow, I didn’t think so. I was pretty certain that what I had to say would be damaging enough for the two of us and all the other parties involved. Halle and his father.
“Okay, tell me.”
A line etched between his brows, and he ran his hand over his handsome face.
“Two nights ago, I went on a stakeout with Lopez, and I found out something about my father.”
“What?” What the hell could it possibly be?
“He’s… the person behind all the threats for the motel.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. “What!”
“Yeah, I don’t know how or what connection he made with those loan guys, but I’m pretty certain he struck a deal with them to try and get Halle to give over the motel because she couldn’t pay the debt. He sent them to her when he realized she was in trouble. It showed he was keeping tabs on her and knew she’d take the bait.”
I couldn’t believe it. The extent of the evil in that man. He really was the devil.
“Halle told me he went to her a few weeks ago talking about co-owning the motel.”
“God, well, that’s part of it. It’s him. It’s all him. Fucking bastard. The motel’s worth a lot, Anya. The business potential alone with the proper advertising could bring in a fortune because of the location on the seafront. It’s homely, and it’s the kind of place where by it doesn’t need to be expensive because it’s a motel, and it doesn’t need to be cheap like most motels because of where it is and how it looks.”
All I could do was stare at him. It was beyond bizarre, but now that I knew what his father was like, I wasn’t actually that surprised. Not in the least.
That news, however, was so much lesser than the bomb I was about to drop on him.
“It was like he wanted to take everything from her, all her accomplishments. I understand if you don’t want to see me anymore. My father caused Halle extra stress and got mafia goons to scare her into giving away her one accomplishment in life.”
I was shaking my head before he even finished. “You are not your father.”
Hope sparked in his eyes as I spoke. “Baby, you still want to be with me?”
His voice sounded weak.
“Yes.” I wished it could be as simple as that. I really, really did. But here was where I had to be brave.
He reached for me, but I shied away from him, and he looked at me, not understanding. “Baby, come here.”
I shook my head and tried to hold the tears back. “No, it’s my turn to tell you something, and when I tell you, I don’t think you’ll want to be with me.”
He stared at me deeply, eyes glassy, almost expressionless, almost…
I saw hurt. It was there lurking beneath the surface of his gaze.
“What… tell me.”
I didn’t have the strength to, so I would show him. I held out the diary to him, and he took it.
“What is this?”
“It’s Halle’s. Read it.”
He opened it and started reading. I knew the exact part where he crumbled because it was the part where I’d crumbled at too. But … unlike me, Caine seemed to slip away from himself. It was like watching him step out of his body and become something else. A darker version of him.
“No, fuck, no….” Tears were streaming down his cheeks, and when he looked at me, I didn’t recognize him. “Anya, what is this? My father, he… no… nooooooo!” he growled looking like an insane person. But there was more. My heart wasn’t strong enough for this.
“Caine, look at the date on the first page.”
He bared his teeth and hissed but did as I said. The moment he looked at the date, I knew he would figure it all out.
I watched the moment he did; it unveiled itself before me. It was like I could see his mind working.
“Mom... It was them she saw. Oh God... no.”
As tears ran down his cheeks, my heart broke for him, and for me. There wasn’t anything more I could do. I’d broken the hearts of the people I loved the most today, and I couldn’t repair it. There wasn’t anything I could say or do to fix it.
Caine dropped the book and didn’t even look at me as he stormed out with death and vengeance in his eyes.
It scared me.
Chapter 20
Caine
This room used to have pictures of us as a family. This room and the living room.
This use to be Dad’s office, and still was by the looks of things. Seemed more like a place he hung out in now more than anything.
There were some Cuban cigars in a box, a box of Belgian chocolates, and cases of bear in the corner.
When I looked around the place, I found a whole fucking library of porn, then the thing I was looking for.
It was exactly where I’d last seen it. I was ten, maybe a little younger. Nine and getting close to my tenth birthday. I’d snuck in here to see what Dad was up to. A few pushes of certain buttons, and a tug here and there, and I’d found this.
A unique-looking Barretta with a wooden handle. It had its own bullets and came with a fancy case too. Nice.
My hands shook as I held it now, looking at the barrel. I wasn’t sure just yet what I was going to do with it. Not sure, not at all. Right now, I was holding it. Maybe, like the other day, I’d scare Dad with it. Here’s the thing though.
Unlike Donny, whom I’d wanted to scare, I wanted to kill Dad.
The intent was there, and I was holding a weapon. A weapon that would easily be a tool in exacting the revenge I wanted for all the evil he’d done.
He was the reason for all of this.
He’d abused Halle. Mom saw them and thought they were having an affair and killed herself.
Halle was right. He was the devil.
No one in their right mind would be so evil. Then, like I’d analyzed, he wanted to take the last thing she had left. Her motel.
I was disgusted with myself, and with him. He was worse than I could have ever imagined. Worse than I could have ever conceived, and yet he acted so carefree, liked he’d never done anything wrong. Him trying to rebuild relations with me, him talking to me like he really did want to be my father, him talking to me like he cared. That asshole didn’t care about anyone but himself.
And… right now, as I sat here, I really didn’t know what I was doing.
I wondered… if I killed him, would I get a lesser sentence because of all my good deeds in Iraq and Afghanistan?
Would the situation be understood? Maybe the judge would think I had PTSD and send me to some secure mental unit. Or maybe they’d give me the death sentence. I couldn’t remember what North Carolina law was on the death penalty. I knew you’d have to do something evil like kill someone.
All those options meant I’d either die or go away for a long time, and I wouldn’t see my Anya ever again.
Fucked-up shit. That’s what this all was. All of it. Every last fucking bit, and I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing.
It reminded me of that film Seven with Brad Pitt. When he saw his fiancée’s head in the box and killed the killer. Then he ended up in prison. I felt like that.
Being so hurt, to a degree where you had to do something and to avenge your loved one, and also that feeling where you’d lost everything and there was nothing left to lose.
I’d lost Mom, I’d lose Halle when she found out what Dad had done, and I was pretty certain I’d Iost Anya.
My girl.
Why would she want to be with me after this? And… after whatever I was here to do.
The door opened, and in came Dad.
He didn’t expect to see me though. Of course not.
“Caine, God, you startled me. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but I didn’t know you were stopping by.”
I looked at him and waved the gun. At least my hand wasn’t on the trigger. It was hovering dangerously close though, and it wasn’t like I didn’t know how to use it gunslinger style.
His gaze was drawn to the gun in my hand.
“You fou
nd my gun again.”
“Wasn’t hard to find. You could have hidden it better, don’t you think?” I straightened.
“Are you okay, son?” He held the end of his coat and tugged mindlessly on the edge.
“Why did you have a family, Dad? Tell me. I would love to hear it from your side. Guessed you were a cheating bastard long before Mom got the gist. But hey, that aside, you must have had your reasons for wanting a family.”
“I loved you and your mother, Caine. What’s this about?”
“Don’t.” Now I flicked the gun over and waved it at him. “Don’t patronize me. Answer the fucking question, and make sure you think about what you’re saying. I’m the one holding the gun.”
“I… loved your mother when we first got married, then I got sidetracked. Being a family looked good back in those days. Investors were more willing to take a chance on a family man, an established family man with no baggage or drama.”
“She loved you.” I didn’t even recognize my own voice.
“I know, and I did love her at one point. This… Caine… what is this about? What triggered you to behave this way?”
“I know everything, Dad. How you abused Halle, how you teamed up with those mafia guys to scare her into giving up her motel.” Anger boiled within me the more I spoke. “And fuck, you’d never guess what. It was you and Halle Mom saw the night before she killed herself.”
I pointed the gun at him and held it ahead of me, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t shoot him. It seemed easy when I’d thought about it earlier, but that wasn’t me.
His skin went ghost pale, and his eyes wide, but I dropped the gun on the desk, stood up, and made my way to the door.
Defeat.
“You came here to kill me,” he snarled. “Your own father. You were going to kill me. After all I did for you. I never treated you badly. I always showed you that I cared. You’re just like your mother.”
I snapped around so fast I didn’t know I could move that fast, and my hands flung out and punched him straight in his face, sending him reeling backwards.
“Fucking asshole, don’t talk about my mother, or anyone who means something to me. You stay away from Halle.”
He squirmed on the ground. “That bitch doesn’t know what she has, doesn’t know what to do with an investment like a motel on the beach.” His true colors were coming out now.
“But you do, right?” I grabbed him by his neck and held him high, but it didn’t phase him. “Tell me, was she a bitch when you thought it was a good idea to rape her? I should kill you just for that. It’s enough. More than enough.”
It was, and he was seriously provoking me right now.
He had the audacity to laugh. “So, do it. Kill me.” He chuckled because he knew I’d found it hard to do anything just a few minutes ago. “Would it help to hear how she screamed and begged me to stop, then how she begged me to let her keep her job, so she could feed her sister and her niece? Her niece, the pretty girl you’ve been running around town with.”
I sent another punch straight in his face and threw him on the ground. Killing him with a gun was too good for him.
My fists would do the job though.
I’m sorry, Anya. I never got to tell you that I love you, and it turns out I’m a relationship guy after all.
I jumped on him and gave it to him. One punch after another, until his face was bloody.
I didn’t hear the door open behind us, or the voice of the person who came in until they grabbed my hand.
No not they. She.
She grabbed my hand as I raised it midair, ready to land another punch in Dad’s face. I don’t know how she stopped me, but she did.
Halle. The shock of seeing her instantly immobilized me, and I stopped and glared at her hand holding on to mine.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Don’t do it. We both know I raised you better than this. No more. He’s not worth it.”
Frail as she was standing over the both of us on shaky legs, her voice was strong, confident, and proud.
“Halle,” I breathed, trying to see past my anger.
“Come on, son, you’re still my sweet little boy.” I didn’t know how she could call me that after everything.
I stood up and hugged her.
“I’m so sorry, Halle. I wish I could have protected you.” I was crumbling. Just looking at her made me crumble and fall apart inside.
“No, it wasn’t your job to. Come on, let’s go.”
“Halle, you turned my son against me,” Dad sputtered.
We both looked at him and glared. At that same moment, Lopez came through the door in full cop mode.
“Your girl called me,” Lopez began. “She said you might need me here. I wasn’t sure—” Seeing Dad on the ground, he stopped talking.
“There’s a lot of explaining to do, but take him in, please. We’ll fill in the details on the other charges later.”
“Gotcha.” Lopez nodded.
I took Halle out of the room, away from my father.
Walking away again. This time really was the last time that I would be seeing him.
I got Halle back to the hospital, where they checked her over and got her right back into bed.
Anya was on her way and would probably be here soon.
“Can I get you anything else? That tea you like or anything?” I gave her an extra pillow for her back.
“No. I’m okay. I think.” She rested back against the pillows and sighed. “Caine, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for what happened to happen to your mother.”
“I know that. There’s nothing for you to be sorry for. Halle, I wished you’d come to me.”
“And tell you what?”
“Tell me what was going on. I could have saved you.”
“You’d lost a lot. Too much, and you had to be strong. You still chased your dreams, and I’m glad you did.”
“I never wanted anything to happen to you.” I would never have guessed that the person my mother referred to in her note was Halle. It wouldn’t have dawned on me, but the clues had been there. All that she wrote was filled with pain. Everything. From the first word to the last. She couldn’t believe that Dad would cheat on her with a woman she’d trusted me with since birth.
“It’s painful for you to accept what happened, and I don’t know how I can go on with the knowledge of the truth.” Her eyes glossed over again. “Then to find out about the motel.”
We’d talked about that. Everything was all out in the open. Lopez said he’d gotten some patrol cops to investigate Quick and Easy Loans, and they raided the place and found a million dollars’ worth of cocaine. Debt resolved.
He’d taken Dad in, and I didn’t care what happened to him. I’d insisted on Halle giving her statement, and she’d promised to do that tomorrow.
“My father is the one to blame. I can’t apologize enough for his actions. How did you know to come tonight? I would have…”
“You would have killed him?”
“I think so.”
“I went to see him, to have it out with him for what happened. Anya came by earlier and told me the story. Neither of us knew about the motel at that point. I think hearing he was still trying to take from me was another blow. But it wasn’t as bad as hearing that his evil actions resulted in your mother’s death. She was such a good person. I can’t believe she saw me like that and thought I betrayed her.” Frustration filled her face.
“Please, don’t think like that. We know the truth.”
“Thank you for not disowning me, because you could. I should have spoken up sooner, but I was scared of what would happen to me and my family. Anya went through a lot growing up. My sister and I did too. We lost our home when we were little, and we had to live on the streets with our mom. I never knew my dad. I never wanted that to happen to her again. That’s why I stayed.”
It was so sad. “I’d never disown you. Not ever.”
“Thank you, son. Let’s try to put this behind us. Clos
e this chapter of our lives.”
“Not be defeated.” I smiled. “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated.”
She laughed, and the sound filled me with hope and joy, love. Possibly peace. “I definitely did a good job with you if you can quote Maya Angelou to me.”
“Well, you made me write down things like that and drilled it into my head. So, Aunt Halle, I will not be defeated.”
“I like that, Aunt Halle.”
“Me too, but let’s keep that between you and me. Anya gets very territorial and possessive over you. Vicious little thing she is. I tried to tell her you were more mine than hers. I was joking, and she nearly bit my head off. God.”
Laughing. “Boy, you stand here giving me non-sense about Anya when you’re completely sweet on her and didn’t tell me. I had to guess what was going on. I’m so offended.” She was acting like herself, as if nothing happened.
“Halle, I really like your niece, a lot. It’s your fault.”
“How?”
“Not sure, but I’ll think of something.”
Jokes aside, I wasn’t sure where Anya and I stood. Halle and I seemed okay, but that didn’t mean Anya would be okay with me. So much wrong had been done to Halle by someone related to me.
My father.
“Tell her how you feel.”
“I don’t know how she’ll react with all that’s happened. It’s awful.”
“Lieutenant, are you serious about my girl?”
“Yes, ma’am, but the fool I was, I told her I didn’t do relationships.”
Halle frowned at me. “Boy, why in the world would you tell a woman such tripe when you’ve loved her from day one?”
She knew, of course she did.
“I didn’t have the best examples of love in my life.” I missed this kind of talk with her, but I’d never been so open with anyone. “And I held on to the reason for Mom’s death for so long. I didn’t want to be the cause of hurting anyone like that.”
“You are not your father. And don’t offend me. Your parents may not have loved each other, but you had me. You knew what love was because I showed you and taught you. You were the child I never had but did, because you are mine.”
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