by Dylan Howard
But there was concern behind the scenes. William, whose deep bond with Harry had been a crucial mainstay of his life, was worried about his wayward younger brother. According to Royal biographer Ingrid Sewell, William and Kate felt Harry was rushing things.
“It was all so quick that William and Kate didn’t have a moment to get to know Meghan, because Harry hardly knew Meghan,” she said. “Of course, William and Kate would have quite naturally thought, ‘Oh she’s been married before, she’s older than Harry, I hope she’s going to make him happy.’ Anyone would think that.”
One of our sources reports: “Kate was always close to Harry and they always enjoyed a very playful, jokey relationship. However, she was nervous about meeting Meghan—mainly because she had heard and read and been told so much about her yet had not met her at that point … She had Charlotte with her and things flowed pretty naturally when the meeting took place. Kate offered Meghan tea, and Harry cracked a few jokes and quips. They were cordial and it was actually quite a formal meeting, hardly relaxed. Meghan smiled a lot and talked about her charity work, it was … well, afterward they called it a success.”
But niceties aside, William’s concern came from wondering whether his brother was quite sure he wanted this whirlwind of Californian energy and dynamism taking over his life. After all, Harry was still reeling from the ups and downs of the past few years, undergoing therapy and still processing his grief over his mother’s death. For William, a man who had taken almost a decade to get around to finally marrying his own partner, caution and measured thinking was the key, as he liked to inform those around him.
For Harry, who had been subconsciously seeking a figure to replace the mother so cruelly torn from him at a vulnerable age, Meghan’s confidence, commitment, drive, and ambition were irresistible. For the Royals, steeped in their characteristic blend of staid duty, austerity, and privilege, she was a dangerously unknown quantity. Having been yanked unceremoniously over the coals for their perceived callousness in the immediate aftermath of Diana’s death, the family believed that they had modernized quite enough in recent years, thank you very much. But they hadn’t counted on Harry falling in love with a woman who would not be cowed by the royal institution and who had accepted the impulsive Harry’s invitation to a trip to Botswana, for only their third meeting.
“Harry’s in Botswana?” Kate was reported to exclaim when she heard the news, aghast at the unseemly speed at which events were unfolding. Her discomfort echoed that of the man closest to Harry, who knew his erratic brother well enough to sense impending disaster looming.
Kate’s womanly intuition made her warn Harry that he needed to go slow. She gently reminded him that he was dating someone with a completely different life, past, and career and it would take time, care, and attention for them to integrate. Harry’s grandfather, Prince Philip, in typically blustery form, was much more direct and is rumored to have told Harry that one should “step out with actresses, not marry them.” (One wonders how on Earth he had gained that knowledge.) Meanwhile, as far as anyone knows, the Queen retained her otherworldly silence, beadily observing Harry and Meghan’s antics from her throne and most probably praying Harry wasn’t following in his father’s disastrous footsteps. As one courtier observed to The Sun: “A lot of people in the family objected. Who really knows what the concerns were? Was it Meghan’s background? Her father and dreadful half-sister? Because she was an outspoken American? Divorced? But Harry stood up for Meghan very forcibly. He really loves her.”
But it was William’s quiet words of caution and carefulness that ignited Harry’s fury. “William just wanted to stress that becoming part of the Royal Family is a massive undertaking and the pressure and scrutiny is unrelenting,” said a source close to the brothers. “Was Meghan the right one?”
Harry didn’t take well to William’s words of caution, following his first meeting with Meghan at the end of 2016. Once she’d left, William reportedly warned Harry that they didn’t know her intentions and her background. In response, according to a Palace insider, Harry “went mental” and accused his brother of trying to finish their relationship before it had started. Harry’s rage was compounded when, allegedly, other senior Royals expressed their concerns to him, despite their superficially friendly reactions to Meghan. Nevertheless, the concern within the Palace staff wasn’t all about Meghan’s lack of suitability—some professed (quietly) quite the opposite opinion. At a gathering of senior family members, including Meghan, one well-placed aide remarked, “All their IQs put together would not equal hers.”
One courtier said: “It’s my opinion that Harry feels he couldn’t protect his mother, so he’s going all out to protect his wife. This is his way of atoning. He will brook absolutely no criticism of Meghan—and he is so sensitive he often sees criticism or negativity where there isn’t any.”
The Royals’ unease may have also been prompted by Meghan’s claiming that she wasn’t especially familiar with the family before meeting Harry. Which was baffling, to say the least. “Because I’m from the States,” she claimed to the BBC. “You don’t grow up with the same understanding of the Royal Family—and so while I now understand very clearly there’s a global interest there, I didn’t know much about him.”
But according to Ninaki Priddy, Meghan had been obsessed with the Royals from childhood. “It’s like she has been planning this all her life,” commented Priddy. “She gets exactly what she wants and Harry has fallen for her. Even when she was with Trevor, she told me she wanted to go and stay in London for at least a month … I wasn’t shocked or even surprised to hear about Prince Harry.”
Meghan’s strategy of claiming she was more or less indifferent to the Royals was a peculiar tack for her to take. Aside from Priddy’s claims to the contrary, Meghan, having grown up in Hollywood, would have been no stranger to the romance of the British Royal Family. Furthermore, as she was age fifteen or so when Diana died, a romantic like Meghan couldn’t have failed to have been devastated by the tragedy.
While the media storm over their blossoming romance temporarily calmed in the wake of Harry’s stern edict to the press, the Prince himself had other matters to deal with. The Queen had instructed Harry to undertake his first solo tour as a senior Royal, representing her at the independence anniversary celebrations in Barbados, Guyana, and Antigua. It was a chance for Harry to show how he had matured and grown in recent months. She needn’t have worried—the trip was an unmitigated success, even when Harry was blindsided by what appeared to be a case of procurement, when the Antiguan prime minister introduced the Prince to a bevy of beautiful, bikini-clad models with a snigger, saying, “Whatever is done here stays here. So, don’t worry.” Harry was stunned, remarking to aides later he found the whole thing “pretty distasteful.”
Whereas the Harry of old might well have made a grave error of judgment in Antigua when confronted with the opportunity to get friendly with the locals, now he had Meghan Skyping him nightly for progress reports and encouragement. The effect of her presence in his life showed—commentators on the tour noted how much more relaxed Harry seemed, how assured and calm, with one Royal journalist, Camilla Tominey, observing accurately, “With his American girlfriend Meghan Markle putting a spring in his step, it’s fair to say Prince Harry has rarely been in better form.”
Following a quick pit stop in Toronto to see Meghan, Harry returned to the United Kingdom with Meghan hot on his heels, joining him at his Nottingham Cottage hideaway in Kensington Palace.
That December, when Meghan was seen in public in the United Kingdom for the first time since the relationship became known, she was spotted sporting an “H & M” necklace (presumably not the budget clothing chain). Kate’s posh friends had a field day, giggling behind their exquisitely manicured hands, at the tacky gesture, according to sources. Harry was showing her the sights of London—perhaps not the exclusive, tasteful locations that Meghan was more accustomed to, but taking her to the West End of London in the pre-Christmas
mayhem to see the popular stage play The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. A few days earlier, evidently having mugged up on this theater stuff that Meghan kept going on about, Harry had romantically taken her to see tourist favorite The Lion King.
Clad in matching beanie hats, the pair made their way through London’s Shaftesbury Avenue, Harry excitedly pointing out the sights and lights on this, one of London’s busiest thoroughfares, while Meghan kept her head down. Harry looked ecstatic.
“Harry has said his privacy is important to him,” said the source. “They were clearly not afraid to be seen in public together. They are clearly crazy about each other and have told friends they are very much in love. Both Harry and Meghan obviously understand the intense interest in their relationship but are determined to enjoy time together without too much fuss.”
Harry and Meghan also celebrated the season by buying a Christmas tree from the Pines and Needles tree farm in Battersea Park, where the owner, Sam Lyle, tickled at his Royal client, told The Sun: “You could have heard a pin drop—or a needle—when Prince Harry and Meghan walked into the store. They were completely charming together and blissfully unaware that our jaws had hit the floor. They chose a gorgeous Nordmann Fir and walked away after exchanging Christmas pleasantries.”
A fellow customer, Gary Spence, said: “It was a bit weird seeing Prince Harry browsing the Christmas trees. I thought he’d go for the biggest one around, but he just wanted a little six-footer.”
Though protocol prevented Meghan from accompanying Harry to the traditional Royal Family Christmas dinner, early in January they traveled to Tromsø in Norway, to see the Northern Lights. It was around this time that the makers of Suits came to a decision. Since Harry and Meghan went public, the media brouhaha over their star had gotten to the point it was making filming an impossible ordeal. Showrunner Aaron Korsh knew something had to give and so took the bold step of writing Rachel Zane out of the series. Her onscreen lover, Patrick J. Adams, understandably felt awkward about filming sex scenes with an actress who was dating one of the most famous men in the world. Meghan was gently let go from the series that had made her name.
As she slid further into the Royals orbit, she also had to give up another much-loved activity—her blog. Since inception, The Tig had grown into something of a big deal, with thousands of loyal followers lapping up Meghan’s thoughts on everything from fashion to body fascism, gender issues, travel, and lifestyle. The winding down of The Tig as an independent platform for Meghan’s personal expression mirrored the increased discretion she would need to draw over her views and opinions, now that there was a chance her relationship with Harry would become significant. As she closed the blog in March 2017, she bade a sad farewell to her readers, leaving them with that misty-eyed quote from Gandhi to “be the change you wish to see in the world.” Her Instagram account was closed down too, prompting a wave of heartfelt farewells from her online gang.
The instruction to close the blog came from Harry. This ex-soldier—the man who had fought the Taliban in Afghanistan, who had braved the slings and arrows of global media attention and survived so much—now became a little mouse when he nervously approached Meghan and told her he had been advised that due to her outspoken views, she had to cease her constant social media activity. It was a warning sign as to the developing dynamic of the relationship, which was obvious to everyone apart from Harry. Meghan was incensed but diplomatically bit her lip and rapidly assessed the situation, deciding to pick her battles wisely. Within seconds, she regained her sunny composure, but Harry would have seen that flash of a temper she had long learned how to control—and would have learned to fear it.
Meghan knew that her relationship with Harry was still new and she was just learning how to fit in with his incredibly complex world. However, she made a mental note of the way Harry had handled the situation and filed it away for future reference.
In The Tig’s closing statement, she wrote: “What began as a passion project (my little engine that could) evolved into an amazing community of inspiration, support, fun and frivolity. You’ve made my days brighter and filled this experience with so much joy.”
A source rather disingenuously suggested that the real reason for shutting the site down was her “busy schedule,” balancing her charity work and television career, but it was easy to see what was really going on. What’s more, Meghan was secretly fuming about having to delete the brand she had put so much effort into creating over the previous three years.
But Meghan was recalibrating herself. That much was evident to friends, who witnessed the transformation in Meghan’s life as her romance with the Prince intensified.
Shortly after Meghan closed down The Tig, she accompanied Harry to the wedding of one of his closest and oldest friends, Tom “Skippy” Inskip. It was her first experience at a function of one of Harry’s inner circle and would be an intensive crash course in how to navigate the world as a member of the global elite. The wedding was in Montego Bay in Jamaica, and the couple was staying in a lavish, seven-thousand-dollar-per-night villa. As soon as they arrived, the paparazzi were present, training their long lenses on the young lovers as they frolicked in the Caribbean waters. Harry was furious and dragged Meghan out of the line of sight, while she tried to calm him down. At the actual wedding event the next day, the pastor who married Tom and his bride, the Honorable Lara Hughes-Young, cheekily told Harry, “It’s your turn next, Sir.”
After a few precious days alone in an exclusive retreat in Negril, Harry and Meghan continued their transglobal affair, spending less and less time apart. Meghan would pop back to Toronto to visit her dogs and water the plants, before jumping back onto a London-bound flight to be with her paramour. He, in turn, was doing all he could to ensure Meghan was by his side as much as possible. In September 2017, he was due to host the Invictus Games in Toronto. When he flew to Toronto in March to attend planning meetings for the event, he stayed with Meghan and made it abundantly clear to everyone that come what may, he would have her at his side throughout. “Harry wants everything out in the open, for the days of skulking around to be over,” commented a friend who was at the meetings. “He wants to show Meghan off as his future wife and the Games, which he has put his heart and soul into, will be the perfect platform to do that.”
Meghan’s elusive father, Thomas Senior, meanwhile, still hadn’t met Harry. The press was combing his last known addresses, but the portly ex-lighting director seemed to have gone to ground. Meanwhile, Doria was speaking on most days to her daughter, keeping her grounded and connected to her roots as she navigated her first few months in the royal bubble.
In Britain, no royal relationship would be complete without a sporting kiss—taking place usually after the female half of the sketch had been seen adoringly supporting her man as he played polo, in a muddy English field. The typical polo match would see a flotilla of mud-spattered Land Rovers, Labradors gamboling about, horseboxes and stable girls, posh wives and families picnicking on smoked salmon sandwiches and champagne from large, shabby hampers while the men barreled around the pitch on horseback, swiping at one another. Harry and William were old pros at the game, and in May, the world got to see Meghan following tradition and really sealing the deal on the relationship with a smooch for Harry in the parking lot after a game at the Coworth Park Polo Club in Berkshire. Dressed down in dark glasses and a camel-colored jacket, Meghan boldly wrapped her arms around Prince Harry, who wore a white shirt, as the cameras clicked.
Later that month, despite the PDA at the polo, there were some red faces at the Palace and at the Middletons’ GHQ in the country when it had to be explained that Meghan had not been invited to Kate’s sister Pippa’s wedding.
“People told her it’s common in England for her to be a ‘plus one’—Harry’s ‘date’—and for her to only attend the evening party,” said a source. “However, Meghan was confused by this. Was she invited or was she not? How can you be half-invited to a wedding? Still, she got over t
he snub and chalked it up as just another of ‘those British things’ she didn’t understand.”
But Meghan also started to question—is it something to do with me? Am I being singled out? Do I really not fit in here?
Harry, of course, was not impressed. So much so, that he made a huge fuss about Meghan’s presence being essential. He was so set on her going to the wedding, he pulled out all of the stops and made a hundred-mile round trip just to pick her up. A chivalrous move, but it meant Meghan still wasn’t present to see the Duchess of Cambridge’s sister marry James Matthews at St Mark’s Church in the Berkshire village of Englefield.
Rumors had circulated about the possibility of Pippa holding a “no ring, no bring” rule, which would stop nonmarried couples from attending the wedding. But despite Meghan not being married or engaged to Harry, she finally attended Pippa Middleton’s wedding reception regardless.
Perhaps Pippa was worried she could be upstaged by Harry’s girlfriend, after noting the coverage from Skippy’s wedding in March in Montego Bay. “She saw how all eyes were on Meghan rather than Lara,” a source said.
Here, Meghan was, despite all her savoir-faire and worldliness, stumped by the intricacies of that anachronistic, lunatic structure, the British class system. To her face, everyone was charming, happy to meet her, making friendly chitchat, asking all the right questions, and congratulating Harry on his wonderful partner. Meghan was painfully unaware that every move she made was being analyzed and quietly judged. Having grown up in such rarefied circles, Harry would have been excruciatingly aware of this. To what extent he explained to Meghan that she was very much on trial by the upper classes is unknown. Most likely, she would have laughed off his concern that her social graces and etiquette were under the microscope, knowing she was her own woman and wouldn’t change her behavior for anyone.