by Jaclyn Quinn
Avery flexed the fist not holding his phone. “Hey,” he said when Nina answered the phone. “We found him.”
“Oh, thank God. Is he okay?”
“Yeah, he’s okay. We’ll be back in a little bit.”
“Okay, honey. See you soon.”
Avery said goodbye and ended the call.
“Would I lie to you?” Ryder asked Chris to which Chris vigorously shook his head no. “Okay then.” Ryder winked then reached down for Chris’s backpack. “So, you’ll come with us back to Nina and Stan’s?”
“Yeah, but can you guys stay for a little bit?”
Avery knew there was no one in the world who could say no to that pleading, tear-streaked face. “Of course, we will. Let’s go see what Nina planned for dinner. I’m starving.”
The car ride to Nina’s was quiet, but Avery would take that in a heartbeat as long as he knew Chris was safe. He didn’t realize just how attached he’d become to the boy until they couldn’t find him. The first time it had happened, Avery had a detachment to the situation because he didn’t know Chris. This time, he damn near ran every red light trying to find him. He could only imagine what had been going through Ryder’s mind.
Avery pulled up in front of Nina and Stan’s home, and the three of them got out. Before they had even made it to the driveway, Nina opened the door and came rushing out, arms open. “Oh my God, I was so worried.”
Chris, surprisingly, hugged her back. “I’m sorry, Nina.”
She pulled back and held his face. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I know you’re overwhelmed, and I know you’re scared, but you have us now, okay?”
Avery knew things weren’t really that simple, but he didn’t want to scare Chris or upset him again.
They tried to talk during dinner about anything but what was going on. Conversation steered toward school, shows they watched, what Chris had been drawing lately. But there was a heaviness in the air; a black cloud hovering above them.
When dinner was over and Ryder and Avery were about to leave, Chris stopped them both. He hugged Ryder first, then Avery, and it amazed Avery how full of love Chris was, even with everything he’d gone through. “Will you guys come back tomorrow?”
“Yeah. We’ll see you after school,” Avery replied.
“Okay.” Then he smiled and reluctantly went upstairs to do his homework before bed.
Avery and Ryder left Nina and Stan’s, both of them thinking about what had happened in the last couple of hours. Ryder cracked his knuckles then continued the movement absentmindedly, which Avery now knew meant he was uneasy and frustrated. Avery could relate.
“This fucking sucks. I’ve never felt so damn useless in my entire life,” Ryder grumbled as he stared out the window. “If I thought for one second that I could take care of him, I’d do it in a heartbeat.”
“What makes you think you can’t?” Avery’s pulse kicked up; he’d been thinking the same thing over the last few days. Ever since they’d gone to the diner with Chris. He’d always wanted a family like Kevin and Maggie had, and now like Jake and Eli. The problem was, he never imagined doing it on his own.
“Pfft,” Ryder huffed out humorlessly. “What do I know about taking care of another person? I can barely take care of myself.”
“That’s not true. Whether you realize it or not, you have a way of putting other people first. That’s basically what being a good parent is; protecting your children above all else. If the state thinks they’re going to put Chris with a bunch of strangers, they’re fucking with the wrong family.”
Ryder chuckled. “Well, hello there, Mr. Mob Boss. Snapping out threats looks sexy as hell on you. Damn, who knew those suits of yours served another purpose?”
Avery snorted, giving Ryder a side-glance. “You think so, huh?”
“Oh yeah.” Ryder stopped his nervous knuckle cracking and reached over for Avery’s hand. “Never gonna look at them the same way again.”
“Damn, Avery. You grew up here?” Ryder gazed out the window, his mouth hanging open, but all Avery saw was the place he’d moved far away from.
Okay, so an hour away wasn’t much, but it was enough to ensure no drop-in visits from his family. They’d actually never seen his place in Brighton Pier, and to be honest, he was happy about that. He didn’t need their negative vibes in the town he now called home.
“Yup,” he replied. “Eighteen long years until I went to college. It wasn’t bad,” he quickly amended. “Just boring, and you know, I never lived up to my father’s standards.”
“I’m a hundred percent positive that has to do with his warped expectations, not you letting him down. That’s why I’m here.” A mischievous grin spread across his face. “They’ll have no idea what to make of me.” Ryder leaned his head down so he could see the whole house through the windshield. “Yeah, this place looks colder than a polar bear’s ass; no sticking around in there too long.”
Avery barked out a laugh. “Man, I’m glad you came with me tonight.”
Ryder wiggled his eyebrows. “We should christen a few rooms while we’re here. I bet you never had sex in your old bedroom, huh?”
“Does my hand count?”
Ryder started laughing. “Oh, that’s just sad.”
“All right. Let’s get in and get out.”
Ryder put his fingers up to his temples. “I’m having flashbacks of my nail-it-and-bail-it days.”
Avery sighed. “Get out of the car, Ryder.”
“Yes, sir,” Ryder said with a salute then pointed to Avery. “Oh, you liked when I called you that. I can see it in your eyes. Noted.” As soon as the man got out of the car, Avery adjusted himself before getting out because, yes, he did like it.
Of course, walking into his parents’ house was enough to deflate that excitement. He looked over at Ryder and took a deep breath. Ryder shoved his hands in his pockets and winked.
“Avery, I’m so glad you’re”—his mother looked at Ryder, her eyes widening—“here.”
“Mom, this is Ryder Pearce. Ryder, this is my mother, Gail Hamilton.”
“Oh, well…it’s nice to meet you, Ryder.” Avery’s mother held her hand out, and he couldn’t help but feel again like she really was trying. Honestly, he could put more of an effort in with her as well.
Ryder took his hands out of his pockets and shook her hand. “Nice to meet you, too.” Ryder smirked about the same time Avery’s mom looked down at their hands before her gaze traveled up his tattooed arm.
“Well, you certainly are colorful—not that I mean colorful, as in...” She cleared her throat. “However, if you were, you know, like Avery, that would be fine.” She sighed and shook her head. “I’m messing this up, aren’t I?”
“Not at all,” Ryder said before Avery could attempt to salvage the conversation. “I do have a lot of tattoos, and I do happen to be bisexual, so there you go.” Avery’s mother blushed with Ryder’s honesty but smiled.
Chase walked out of the library, glass of red wine in his hand and smug-as-hell smirk on his face. “Avery, aren’t you going to introduce us? Let me guess…you must be”—Chase snapped his fingers, looking Ryder up and down—“the one who owns the tattoo shop. It’s written all over you, literally.” That sure as hell wasn’t said as a compliment.
For the love of God, he couldn’t wait five minutes?
“Chase,” their mother said with embarrassment reddening her skin.
“What? I’m just making conversation with Avery’s friend,” Chase said snidely, feigning innocence.
Ryder laughed. “No, I’m not as successful as all that. I’m just a tattoo artist.”
“You’re an incredibly talented tattoo artist,” Avery said, getting a smile in return from Ryder. They hadn’t had enough of those lately. And, man, when Ryder smiled, something inside Avery bloomed. He couldn’t even describe the feeling because, quite honestly, he’d never felt that way before.
At that moment, Avery’s dad came down the stairs. “Ah. Avery, this is a
surprise. I didn’t expect to see you, considering how you left the last time you were here.”
Avery sighed; his father and brother were so predictable, but he wasn’t going to stoop to their level. “Happy Birthday, Dad.”
His father nodded his head in thanks, probably disappointed Avery hadn’t taken the bait.
“I don’t wanna eat dinner! I wanna watch TV!” Henry and James came running out from the TV room they had taken over as their own. Honestly, it benefited everyone to have a room they hardly came out of when they were here. “Mom! Mary isn’t listening to me again!”
The young woman sighed when James joined in the way a six-year-old would. “Yeah! She’s stupid!”
“What on earth is going on?” Deirdre asked, but her scowl was directed at Mary, instead of her monster children, who had just clung to each side of her.
“Caroline said their dinner was ready, so I thought it would be nice if they sat with everyone for their grandfather’s birthday.” Mary looked as though she already knew what was coming. To her credit, she was still trying to make the children into tolerable little humans, even though she knew she’d never win that battle.
Deirdre rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. “Mary, honestly, is it really necessary to rile them up this way?” She looked down at her children and her eyes softened. “Stop the tears, angels. Caroline will bring you your dinner in the TV room, okay?” Jesus, did she even realize that as their mother she was still asking for their approval?
Mary looked defeated as the two boys each gave a smirk that resembled the snide one their father always gave, and Avery had to wonder why she stayed at this job. “Yes, Mrs. Hamilton.”
He looked over at Ryder and caught the wide-eyed look he was giving the two heathens who had just gone back into the other room.
Avery’s mother cleared her throat. “Why don’t we all go into the dining room? I had Caroline make a roast chicken.” She waved her hand toward the doorway, and Chase and Deirdre led the way. Avery’s mom placed her hand on Ryder’s arm. “Pay no mind to Avery’s brother or father. They…forget their manners sometimes, as do my grandchildren.” Her face flushed again as she stared apologetically at Ryder. “Philip and Chase are just so ruthless in their jobs, I think they forget sometimes.” Avery wasn’t surprised that she was making excuses for them; that had been part of the problem all Avery’s life.
“No worries, Mrs. H., I can handle it.”
Mrs. H.? Avery arched an eyebrow at Ryder before his mom replied, “You can call me Gail. Although, if you’re uncomfortable doing that, Mrs. H. is fine.”
Who is this woman, and what has she done with my mother?
Ryder nodded his head once. “Gail it is then.”
The three of them made their way to the dining room. Avery’s mother sat in her usual seat at one end of the table across from his father at the other end, and Avery sat in the seat across from Chase, leaving the seat to his left open for Ryder.
Dinner was served, the only sounds in the room were the clanking of dishes and silverware. He’d always been aware how stuffy his family was, but it was painfully apparent now as Ryder sat beside him. Why couldn’t they be back in Brighton Pier at Nina’s or Jake’s, laughing and carrying on? Instead, there was a lengthy discussion between Chase and his father about whatever company they’d just dismantled, followed by an awkward silence until, finally, his mother spoke up.
“Deirdre, I meant to tell you, I saw Laney Statton in town the other day. She’s looking for a new nanny and wanted to know if Mary could recommend anyone.”
Avery’s sister-in-law took a sip of her usual chardonnay. “I’m not sure Mary would be of any help. She’s having trouble handling the children. The thought of having to find another nanny is utterly exhausting.”
Here’s a thought…take care of your own children. Avery had to bite his tongue to hold in the snide comment. God forbid his sister-in-law give up days at the tennis club or spa to watch them, seeing as how she didn’t work. Avery shook his head, looking down at his plate. When he glanced back up, he saw Chase watching him. They’d been here before recently; arguing over how Chase and Deirdre were raising their kids. Honestly, it was none of Avery’s business.
“Are you thinking of letting Mary go?” Avery’s mother asked then took a small bite of her chicken.
Deirdre exhaled, as if even the thought was an inconvenience; even though, from what Avery had seen, Mary was doing her best with two spoiled, little boys. She was fighting a losing battle. Chase and Deirdre would never admit their children were a nightmare to watch. “I may have to. The other day, James came to me crying hysterically. Seems Mary wanted the boys to go through their toys and find things they no longer played with. I guess she planned…well, at least, I hope she planned on discussing with me the possibility of donating some things. Well, of course, James was so distraught.”
Avery clenched his fists on his lap, then released a calming breath when Ryder reached over and covered his hand, loosening his fingers as he thread theirs together. Avery lifted his head and met Ryder’s eyes, feeling the rest of the tension slipping away. This was what he’d never had during these awkward dinners. Ryder was here for no other reason than to make this easier for Avery.
“Well, it could be a good thing for the children to learn. They do have an overabundance of toys they no longer use,” Avery’s mother said cautiously. She knew, of course, that her opinion most likely would be disregarded.
“He’s six years old. I realize there are children less fortunate, but it isn’t something that my children need to concern themselves with.”
Ryder snorted, leaning back in his chair while putting his fork down, and squeezed Avery’s hand. Avery knew that insensitive comment had to have hit a nerve with Ryder.
“Did I say something that you found funny?” Deirdre asked incredulously, and Avery had no doubt that she was clueless as to how she sounded.
Ryder held his hand up. “Oh, no. Please continue.” He waved his hand like a servant would do to royalty, and Avery had to hold in his laugh.
She looked around the table, as if seeking validation from the rest of the family. “I just think that there are certain things our children don’t need to learn yet. The world is scary enough.”
Ryder looked at Avery out of the corner of his eye, squeezing his hand one more time. It was then that Avery realized his mother was watching them in thought, maybe even piecing things together. He sure as hell knew he had a hard time lately hiding how he felt about Ryder. Avery met his mother’s gaze and she smiled.
“You disagree?” Chase asked, eyeing Ryder with cold eyes.
Ryder held Chase’s stare. “Nope. Not my place to tell other people how to raise their kids.”
“Then you admit you think we should be doing something differently,” Chase countered, and Avery could feel his blood pressure rising.
“Chase, enough,” Avery snapped.
“I’m just making friendly conversation with your friend, Avery.” Chase laughed arrogantly.
“Well, I think Deirdre has a point,” Avery’s dad chimed in. “The boys should be taught how to take care of themselves before they worry about the people around them. It’s called minding your own business.”
Ryder whipped his head in Avery’s direction, a wide-eyed look on his face. He shook his head and rolled his lips in. Jesus, why did Avery think this was a good idea?
“Philip, you can’t be suggesting that the boys shouldn’t be mindful of the people around them or understand how fortunate they are.” It wasn’t often that Avery’s mom spoke up, but every now and then, she’d sound her opinion into the conversation. Of course, her opinion wasn’t often heard.
“Gail, don’t be ridiculous.”
Avery’s mother lowered her head, which sent anger racing through him. Maybe he hadn’t given enough thought all these years to how his father treated his mother. “She’s not being ridiculous. Teaching the children about donating to those less fortunate doesn’t n
eed to be a scary thing for them. Maybe they’d be proud of themselves if they understood the reasoning. There are so many children who’d love just one of the toys Henry and James are no longer using. As a matter of fact, those children wouldn’t even give it a second thought that the toys weren’t brand new; they’d be new to them.” Avery directed this at Deirdre, who was still sitting there in disbelief.
“Oh, here we go again. Somehow, you always bring it back around to your crusade to save the world.” Chase huffed. “Do you even hear yourself? They wouldn’t care that they weren’t brand new? Did you ever hear of the phrase, beggars can’t be choosers?”
“Whoa, he did not just say that,” Ryder said to Avery with a laugh, but the humor didn’t reach his eyes. Ryder looked at the rest of the people at the table in awe, and unfortunately, it wasn’t the good kind. Avery thought back to the night that Ryder had referred to himself as a used toy and regretted where this conversation was going.
“So, you have an opinion on the matter after all.” Chase sat back in his chair, hands clasped in his lap. “Can’t say I’m surprised.”
“Why wouldn’t I have an opinion? I just feel bad for your boys; they don’t know any better”—Ryder pointed from Chase to Deirdre—“but you both do.” Avery stared at Ryder, knowing Ryder didn’t understand the weight of what he was saying. Chase and Deirdre should know better, but Ryder didn’t realize how much that comment showed that Ryder did, in fact, know what it was to be a good role model.
Deirdre put a hand to her chest. “Our boys are luckier than most. They shouldn’t have to apologize because they’re more fortunate than others. I won’t concern an eight-year-old and six-year-old about things they’ll never have to worry about.”
Ryder snorted again. “My mistake; I didn’t realize there was an age requirement for compassion.”
“Seems we’ve hit a nerve with the tattoo artist.” Chase gave Ryder a smug grin.
“All right, Chase. That’s enough,” Avery snapped.
“No, I’d really like to hear how your friend feels he’s qualified to judge us,” Chase said to Avery then turned back to Ryder. “I’m assuming this is from personal experience.”