Villains Don't Do Time! (Night Terror Book 6)

by Mia Archer

  I let out a couple of choice curses. This was going to be close. Entirely too close for comfort.

  Then again, it wouldn't be a crazy Night Terror scheme if it wasn't being cut close in a dramatically appropriate way.

  "Time’s up for you Night Terror!" Firebrand shouted. “This is going to be fun!”

  The whole flaming person who wasn’t immediately dying of full body third degree burns was still impressive. What I wouldn't give to have a few moments alone with her in the lab trying to figure out exactly what it was that made that old broad tick. I could revolutionize my ability to resist flames on the job.

  Unfortunately for me and fortunately for her I didn't have time for human experimentation right now.

  No, I had to stall. And I had to hopefully take care of one of the two co-rulers of the city while I was at it. With a little luck she'd never know what hit her. Firebrand or Sabine.

  "So which do I take care of first," Firebrand said. "You, or your little friend?"

  "Take care of the friend!” Sabine shouted.

  I rolled my eyes. Great. Just fucking great. I had a hero trying to kill me and a crazy ex-girlfriend I couldn't even remember who was trying to take care of a girl she thought was the new hotness even though I'd never even so much as kissed this new chick.

  Thought about it? Sure. Who wouldn't looking at her? But nothing had ever happened, damn it!

  Firebrand stared at Technomancer. Clearly she was thinking about which one of us she wanted to kill first, and then she shrugged. Dove straight for Technomancer. Maybe she figured it didn’t matter which villain she killed first, and Technomancer was the closest.

  Damn it. A damsel in distress situation is not what I needed right now! I wasn't going to be able to get to her in time and…

  Technomancer turned and grinned at me. A manic grin just like I'd seen when she was sitting in her cell. The sort of grin that had me thinking she was just a tad bit unhinged. Maybe more than a tad bit unhinged, to be honest.

  Then the handcuffs on her hands fell open and she tossed them aside. The same happened with whatever was holding her feet down. I assumed there was something holding her feet down, at least. One moment she was immobile and the next she was diving for cover.

  Of course. They were using technologically advanced handcuffs and foot cuffs to keep her down, and what was the one thing Technomancer was good at? Fucking around with technologically advanced stuff. They'd basically given her the keys to the kingdom by locking her in something like that rather than putting her in good old-fashioned solid chunks of metal held together by a mechanical locking mechanism.

  Though, come to think of it, I wasn't even sure if that would’ve worked. What if she was just as good with mechanical as she was with electronically modified mechanical?

  Either way, she dove from the platform right as Firebrand flew through the spot where she'd been. Firebrand seemed to be a big fan of streaking through the air like a human missile and slamming into stuff.

  I could use that. If I could get her attention. It was time to pull aggro, as they used to say in the MMOs I spent entirely too much playing when I was in college.

  "I have engaged Fialux mistress," CORVAC said. "She is as formidable as I remember her being when she was working with you."

  "Great," I said. "Now keep her occupied. I'm going to be kind of busy here, and I don't want her interrupting my fun."

  "Affirmative mistress," CORVAC said.

  "I really wish we’d been able to figure out how those fucking guns Dr. Lana created worked," I said.

  "A pity, to be sure mistress, but I am sure we will discover the key to those weapons when it is dramatically appropriate."

  “Isn’t that always how it is," I growled. “Now get to work.”

  It’s not that I didn’t care about talking to CORVAC now that Fialux was on the other side of the city engaging him in a giant robot chassis that had already given her trouble when she faced him down the first time around. At least I hoped it was the same design that’d given us so much trouble when we faced it down the first time around. It’s just that I had problems of my own to deal with.

  "Speaking of dramatically appropriate moments to pull things off," I muttered.

  Firebrand wheeled around, her flaming head scanning the arena and looking for Technomancer. Only Technomancer was nowhere to be seen.

  Sabine's attempt to try and freak me out with the new girlfriend who wasn't even the new girlfriend had fizzled in a spectacular manner.

  Firebrand seemed to sense that something had gone wrong. Sure it was hard to see emotion on that old face since it was made of pure bright flame, but her body language wasn’t pleasant.

  She curved around the edge of the court and pulled up. Stared at me. Glared, is more like it. That was a woman who was not a happy camper. Sure I couldn’t see her eyes because of the whole wreathed in flames thing, but still.

  I did a classic Keanu pose and beckoned her towards me.

  “Bring it, you old bitch!”

  29

  Plans Coming Together

  She did a circle around the bottom of the arena. Which seemed a little ridiculous since she could get a little bit of height in this place if she wanted to. But she decided to go around for the dramatic swirl instead. Like a fiery turd circling a toilet. Pretty much my experience after I had the really spicy stuff down at the “authentic” Mexican place run by a nice couple from Wisconsin down the street in the ‘burbs.

  I smiled. A turd circling the drain seemed like an appropriate metaphor for this old bitch.

  She wheeled around. Turned to face me. That glare was still there, and then she rocketed across the arena. Clearly she was going for the kill, and this old bitch was about to get one hell of a surprise.

  Things slowed down. Because of course they slowed down. Things always seemed to slow down at moments like this. It was almost enough to make me think humanity had some sort of latent time manipulation survival ability, but of course it was simply adrenaline pumping through my body. Giving me a heightened sense of my own reaction time.

  Not that I needed it. No, my heads up display was calculating her trajectory far faster than my mind ever could and my suit was open for business with all the strength augments pumping and ready to do some damage. Everything was at full power, and it was going to be a cakewalk to take out this ancient crusty bitch.

  She streaked over the riser Technomancer had been on just moments ago. She moved closer and closer, my heads up display tracking her and telling me the exact moment when I needed to raise my hand.

  Though of course there was no need for the heads up display to tell me anything. I'd been at this long enough that I knew exactly what to do. My instincts were forged in countless battles with the nastiest motherfuckers Starlight City could offer up, and I was ready for a crusty senior citizen who thought she was all that because she could burst into flames without dying a painful death.

  I raised my hand. Put all of my power into the directional shield facing Firebrand and the other half of the power into my antigrav pushing me towards her at the exact moment she hit. I didn’t want her momentum giving her any advantage in this fight.

  The end result was a massive explosion that flew out from my shield as all the force she was using to try and kill me was pushed back on her. She was knocked back on her ass, and went sliding back across the floor. The flames stayed up for a breath, then sputtered and went out when she slammed against some advertising on the other side of the arena.

  One moment she was a flaming hero sliding across the basketball court leaving a charred trail behind her, and the next moment she was a little old lady bruised to hell and back tumbling around until that final crash.

  She was going to be a hell of a lot more bruised by the time this was done. I held my arms out, twirled around, and looked up at my picture on the big board. I smiled as my prison garments exploded out in thousands of tattered little pieces. They fele down around me like shreds of confetti. Like my ow
n ticker tape parade made by me for me.

  I couldn't resist using the line. The one that was perfect for this moment.

  "Are you not entertained?" I shouted.

  Cheers erupted. Apparently I was still a hell of a lot more popular in Starlight City that Sabine would like to believe. That or the people here simply liked a good show, and that move had been pretty spectacular if I did say so myself.

  Theatricality. It was the key to any good villainous career.

  From the way Sabine glared she wasn't happy about this turn of events.

  I grinned and raised my wrist blaster to her little empress’ dais she'd created out of a high roller suite where overweight corporate pukes could sit around and talk about how smart they were while they slowly crushed the souls and livelihoods out of the working people who put them in that suite in the first place.

  I fired.

  Sabine realized what I was doing a moment before she would’ve been incinerated. She shot up out of the explosion, but it still caught her and sent her tumbling into the crowd. A crowd, I might add, that seemed a little pissed off at their god empress who’d suddenly been cast down among them.

  I wondered if they were going to take care of business before I had the opportunity to, but first I had to take care of a completely different bitch who'd been causing me nothing but headaches since this whole alien invasion thing started.

  Sabine would keep for a moment. Besides, a little bit of mob justice would serve her right.

  I floated over to Firebrand. She glared up at me. Her flames were still fitfully going in and out, but it seemed like they were less and less powerful every time.

  "You bitch," she coughed out.

  “I’m looking at one,” I said, not above a childish jab even as this old lady was clearly dying from a hell of a lot more than a broken hip. That hit must’ve done more to her than I imagined, but I figured it was appropriate that a combination of her own hubris and osteoporosis would be what finally took her out.

  She made a noise in the back of her throat. It sounded like she was getting ready to hock up a loogie. And then, sure enough, she spit out a little candle flame that arced through the air and fell just short of hitting me.

  Not that I had any worries about catching fire. It's not like I was in a heavily inflammable prison jumpsuit this time around. I caught the flame and held it in my hand where it danced for a moment.

  I looked down at her. Slammed my other hand down on the flame. It disappeared with a fizzle. Firebrand's head fell back, and the flames went out for good. She stared blankly at the arena ceiling.

  Cheers erupted around me, and honestly it felt kind of good. I know I’m supposed to say that vanquishing this bitch of an enemy felt empty or something. That it wasn’t as satisfying as it should’ve been because killing someone is never good.

  Fuck that. There are some people in this world who can only improve said world by exiting it, and Firebrand was top on that list if you ask me. The bitch took pleasure in killing villains, and so I was going to indulge in a moment of satisfaction having taken her out.

  Besides, it’d been pretty ironic and funny how she'd destroyed herself with her own power move. The unstoppable force finally and truly went up against an immovable object.

  But ultimately she was just a speed bump on the way to what really mattered. I looked up to where Sabine had obviously escaped that angry crowd. She floated over the arena. Her eyes went wide, and it was clear she knew she was in a hell of a lot of trouble.

  I shot up into the air. If she wanted an arena fight then she was going to get an arena fight!

  She pulled a comically oversized blaster gun from her side and fired at me, but I waved the blasts aside with my shields with ease. I was well practiced in using my directional shields to keep nastiness from hitting me, thank you very much, and batting her shots out of the way was child’s play.

  She was clumsy. Out of practice. As though she hadn't used that thing all that much.

  "You've ruined everything!" I shouted. "You come to my city, take it over, and you took my girlfriend from me!"

  She kept firing. Just enough to keep me busy. Not enough to keep me from moving closer and closer though. Inexorably closer.

  "I don't see why you should care Natalie,” she shouted back. “You moved on pretty quick after I was marooned on that planet, and now it looks like you're moving on to another chick since Fialux isn’t yours!”

  I growled again and fired off a couple of blasts of my own. Again I got the feeling she wasn't practiced in this kind of fighting. Whatever she'd been going up against on that irradiated planet all these years clearly wasn't something that challenged her in the villainy department. She was sluggish, and one of my blasts hit her full force.

  Sabine tumbled end over end. She let out a cry of surprise as she slammed into the bleachers a second time. This time there wasn't any crowd around her to potentially exact revenge though.

  No, it looked like all those idiots had finally realized this wasn't a good place to be.

  "How are you doing this?" she shouted, frustration dripping from her voice as she fired and I deftly block her shots.

  "Simple," I said. "It's not as easy for you to take me out when I'm not surprised!"

  "How are we doing on that element of surprise, by the way?" I muttered.

  "Fialux is currently trying to batter her way through the outer sphere of my chassis," CORVAC said. "It is quite an enjoyable chase."

  "The outer sphere?" I asked. “When did you add layers to that thing?”

  "After you so easily punched your way through the outsides of the previous robot I thought it would be prudent to ensure there were several layers of armor on the next model to delay the inevitable on the off chance we ever went up against a being with powers like Fialux again."

  He paused. Just long enough to tell me that whatever he was about to admit to wasn’t going to make me happy. Or at least it was the kind of thing that wouldn’t make me happy if we weren’t on the same side.

  “I also increased the power on the teleportation interdiction field this time around,” he said. “Though oddly last time it didn’t occur to you in the heat of the battle to toss one of your matter dispersal bombs into my middle via teleportation, so using that new invention wasn’t necessary.”

  “Wait. You invented that? Not Dr. Lana? And you had it in that first fight?”

  “Naturally, mistress. You of all people should appreciate that Dr. Lana has never invented something in her life. Merely stolen,” he said.

  "You're insane," I said. "I want you to know this. Also, I can’t believe I didn’t think of teleporting one of those bombs directly into the middle of that thing. That would’ve made that fight so much easier.”

  Plot holes. Boy was I familiar with them, and more often than not they could be chalked up to the heat of the moment and pure human stupidity. Even from the greatest criminal genius this world had seen since Gene Hackman took to the screen in the late ‘70s when the world learned to believe a man could fly.

  Which always seemed like a ridiculous tagline to me since clearly the world, and Starlight City in particular, had been seeing men, and women in the ‘60s and ‘70s when lady heroes started agitating for being more than the secretary at heroic meetups, flying since before moving pictures and talkies were a thing.

  "I do try, mistress," he said.

  "No!" Sabine shrieked. "It's not supposed to be like this! I'm the ruler of this world!"

  I shot down to the bleachers as she tried to escape. Too slow. I ripped her gun out of her hand. I was so pissed off that I snapped the thing in two without thinking. The thing looked like alien tech, so as I tossed it to the ground I fired a couple of shots from the teleportation portion of my wrist blaster so I’d have that thing to examine at a later date.

  "No!" she shouted. "You're ruining everything!"

  I grabbed her by the neck. Shielding appeared around her neck. She looked down in surprise.

  I sq
ueezed, but I couldn't get through that shielding. Sure Fialux might be able to crush her windpipe even with the shields in place, but I was going to have to disable her suit before I started maiming. She locked eyes with me and grinned.

  "Not strong enough, huh?” she asked.

  I grinned right back at her. Her smile faltered. As well it should. The problem with acting all cocky and confident, like you were holding all the cards, was eventually someone who actually had a good hand was going to call your bluff.

  "I don't have to be super strong," I said. "Not when I have my brain to back things up. CORVAC?"

  "A touch busy at the moment mistress," he said.

  "Are you a supercomputer who can multitask or not? Honestly. Windows has had the ability to run multiple programs at the same time since, what? 3.0? 3.1? I remember being able to Alt-Tab all the way back in the computer labs in middle school. At least the labs that weren’t filled with ancient Apple IIes.”

  There was a pause on the other end. Which I knew was the digital equivalent of a chagrined sniff. If there was one thing that drove CORVAC up the wall it was comparisons to the user interface hell that Bill Gates had unleashed upon an unsuspecting world in the ‘80s.

  I’d even thrown in a reference to his favorite computer ever. Seriously. CORVAC loved him some Apple IIe like a modern teenager complaining about how they were born in the wrong generation loved them some Zeppelin.

  "Done," CORVAC said.

  Sabine’s shield disappeared. There was a shimmer that looked for all the world like the forcefield effect from Star Trek: The Next Generation, and then her neck was open to me. I actually had to dial it back just a bit so I didn’t actually crush her windpipe.

  I wanted to intimidate her. Not kill her. The last thing I wanted was to pull another Dr. Lana, and if I squeezed with the kind of power I'd been putting out when I was trying to squeeze through that shielding then I was going to very quickly end her.