by T J Kelly
“That was your mother’s favorite color when she was a girl,” my uncle said when I walked into his study a short time later.
“You know, now that you say that, I don’t think she ever told me.” I sat in a chair across from Armageddon’s desk. I was wearing a light, buttery yellow t-shirt. I never knew my mother liked that color. I felt a twinge of sadness that for all the love we shared, there were things we never had to time to do.
Like get to know each other.
“You look lovely. Make sure you show your aunt, she may allow you to wear something other than brown and gold.”
We both had a laugh. Peony had impeccable taste, but she was always trying to play up the gold in my hazel eyes. And was heavy-handed at times.
“I’m glad you’re back,” I blurted. I didn’t realize I was going to say that, and it sobered us up.
“I am, too. I’ve spent the last couple of days upgrading our defenses. We shouldn‘t have to worry about David telling anyone how he got through them. Regardless, we now have mechanical traps. It won’t be as easy to cross the borders anymore. They can’t be tuned to ignore the occupants the way the spells can, but we’ll work around that. It’s more important to be safe than to skip across the border wherever we choose.”
“True.” I didn’t want to bring the mood down, but I really wanted to know what he planned to do with David Novato. I didn’t have to ask, though. Armageddon knew where my focus was.
“I’ve got David under lock and key but we’ve come to an understanding. Unfortunately, a truth spell won’t work on him. We can’t ensure he’s being honest with us. Even your aunt has been unable to break through his defenses. He not only can control his ability to disrupt magic, but he has an impenetrable natural shield.”
I grunted. I had an urge to jump up and run to the dungeons to give the guy another kick in the ribs. Armageddon and I weren’t in agreement about how to handle him. I knew what it was like to be David’s prisoner, felt everything he did to my uncle while I was using the Blood-of-my-blood spell. The pain had been agonizing.
What I didn’t feel was Armageddon’s overwhelming guilt about what had happened to David after his parents were killed. Armageddon did. That was the difference. Honestly, I might have felt sorry for him, too, if it weren’t for the whole kidnapping-my-uncle thing.
“I can help with that,” I said. “He taps the life force in nature. It isn’t all that different from blood magic, and that can be disrupted with lead. I’ll work something out.”
“Excellent. We’ll speak with Mort and Peony about that tomorrow,” he said. I was glad he was willing to utilize the talents of his agents. Even apprentices like me. Maybe I could make up for some of my faults. Armageddon stood and then walked around the desk, slipping onto the chair next to me. “We need to review your assignment.”
I groaned. Time to confront my emotional meltdown. And I really didn’t want to. I squirmed, but then let out a noisy sigh of capitulation. “Fine. Let’s talk.”
“The guys filled me in on the events leading up to your separation.”
He didn’t go on, so I felt obligated to provide more details. Harris may not have written me up, but there was no way he would have hidden anything from my uncle. Armageddon was great at interrogations, and I wasn’t any more immune to his tricks than anyone else. Sitting beside me indicated the informal nature of his inquiry, which meant Harris kept his promise. There would be no official reprimand.
“I don’t hate Peter,” I said. I wanted that to be clear. “I was totally out of control, and I feel awful about it, but I realize now how stupid I was. I wish to go on assignment again, but,” and then I stopped. I didn’t want to say it. I fiddled with the silver star necklace that was once again around my neck.
Armageddon waited patiently.
“But I need to learn more self-control first,” I continued. “I completely lost it. I don’t know how my father balanced his darkness. He was always so calm and reasonable. I feel like a train wreck that’s hitching a ride on a wrecking ball that’s on fire.” My voice shook, but I pressed on. “I could have gotten myself killed. Worse, I could have gotten the rest of my team killed. Or you. Or maybe all of us. And then what would Aunt Peony do? She would have lost everyone, and it would have been my fault. It wasn’t my skills or ability that won the day. It was luck. I’m sorry.”
I swiped at my eyes with my fingers. Then just like the gentleman magician he was, Armageddon handed me a handkerchief. I dabbed the tears off my face. It was hard to not sob like a baby, but I wanted to. I had been pushing the consequences of my actions out of my mind, but the fact was, I deserved to be sanctioned. Or even run out of the Irregulars.
“Listen, sweetheart, I’ve had my own struggles with self-control. I want you to come to me when you feel the upheaval, and we’ll work through it together. I’m sorry I wasn’t here for you like I promised.”
That made my gentle flow of tears disappear into a torrent of sobs. I felt so bad about everything that had happened. I had missed my uncle so much when he was gone. Although I tried hard to never acknowledge it, I had been terrified I would lose him the way I lost my parents - right when I needed him most. Thankfully, he didn’t die. But he hadn’t been there, either.
My uncle waited patiently until I finally regained control of myself. “It’s not your fault,” I hiccuped. “I’m the one with the issues here. I really want your help if you think you can fix my brain and stop me from doing evil things.”
Armageddon laughed. “Honey, you’re not evil. Trust me, I know quite a bit more about that subject than you despite the load of Dark you carry. This isn’t about evil or killing. It’s more like emotional overload.”
I snorted. “Oh, fabulous. So you mean I’m hormonal?”
My uncle shook his head ruefully. “I guess that’s what it sounds like, but I wouldn’t imply such nonsense. We’ll figure it out. You won’t have to wear your star necklace by the end of the year,” he pledged.
“I don’t mind. I love stars.” I stared out the window blindly, not thinking. Just letting my mind drift.
“As you wish.” Armageddon leaned back, relaxing. Waiting.
“I was going to kill him,” I confessed. “David Novato wasn’t going to get back up. Ever. When I realized I couldn’t vanquish him, I was perfectly able, willing even, to execute him.”
I was worried about what my uncle would do, but I should have had more faith than that.
“You’re a good agent, Lia. Never doubt that. And there’s nothing wrong with being a decent person incapable of killing, but there aren’t any Irregulars like that. Do you understand? We all have to do what’s needed, even if that means ending a life. You’re a young lady of action. I can’t imagine you would prefer to sit on the sidelines while those around you take all the risks.”
He was right. I could never. “So much Dark inside me is a weakness. It causes so many problems. It might keep me from doing a good job. I may be a danger to the other agents.” My voice caught in my throat. “I’m afraid I’ll lose myself.”
“Your darkness evens you out,” Armageddon reassured me. “You’re logical, methodical, and able to see how events and people fit together. It’s a struggle for you to maintain your balance, but it’s your greatest strength. Even when you’re out of control, you’re still good. Remember, you were critically low on your stores of Light when you attacked David, but in the end, you let him go. You could have stopped us from removing you, and if you embraced the darkness, you would have. The fact you didn‘t go under the dark while in the grip of your overwhelming fury shows who you really are.”
It sounded convoluted, but it also made sense. The part of me that was scared of who I was let out a final burst of fear, then was gone.
“Thanks, Uncle Ged.” The corners of my mouth lifted into a genuine smile.
“No problem. Now, on to more urgent matters.” He abruptly straightened in his chair, looking at me intently. No wonder his enemies were intimidated by hi
m. “Tell me all about you and Seth.”
I gulped.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
The Truth
Peony arranged for us to dine formally. It was funny how the upper class always went with structured events while trying to regain our equilibrium. Considering we knew all the rules, I couldn’t blame her. There was comfort in knowing what was expected.
I made my way upstairs to take a shower and change into something nicer. I guess my aunt would have to wait to see me in yellow.
“How are you doing, pipsqueak?” Mort asked. He was sitting on a bench down the hall from my room, reviewing a stack of papers. I noted he wore his formal vest. Either he had just returned from his law offices, or he had already changed for my aunt’s supper.
“I’m okay,” I said as I sat beside him. My shower could wait. He was there to talk, and I had questions I needed answered.
Mort set the documents aside, slipping them back into a manila folder before locking them in a black leather briefcase. “Good to hear. I’ve been reviewing the agent reports. I’m interested to see what you have to say.”
“Ah. That’s right. I have to fill out an after-action report,” I said. Thoughts about what to add or omit flitted through my mind.
“Indeed. I’ll run through the process with you in the morning. The sooner we can file with the Council, the better. The magical showdown at Lassen reinvigorated the volcano, and they’re concerned there will be an eruption.”
“Oh, that’s fabulous.” My father used to talk about marathon meetings he had with the Council. I hoped I didn’t get summoned. I wasn’t as patient as he was. Plus, I felt bad. Mount Lassen had been simmering before I got there, but I knew I was directly responsible for the increased activity. The potential consequences made my blood run cold.
“Nothing for you to worry about, Lia. We’ll take care of it before anything major happens.” Mort sighed. “Armageddon told me about your Blood-of-my-blood spell. He said he used your connection to give you insight into David Novato.”
So that’s why he had been waiting for me. Good. That was exactly what I wanted to discuss.
“I saw what happened to his parents.” I hesitated, wondering how to ask him about my uncle killing people. Every time I pictured the bodies of David’s parents as he tried to wake them, I trembled. There had to be a good reason. Something they did, a deed that put them on the wrong side of justice.
“Are you sure?” Mort asked. “You were looking through a little boy’s eyes. David Novato explained what he saw during his interrogation, and events unfolded differently than he remembers.”
That was the problem with eyewitnesses. They only observed one part of what transpired. Sometimes, believing their own eyes was to their detriment. It was our job to put the pieces together. That’s why we talked to as many witnesses as possible during an investigation. My heart lifted. I backed my uncle, always would, but it was still difficult to compartmentalize what he did to David’s parents, from my love, admiration, and trust.
Maybe I wouldn’t have to anymore. “What happened?” Turns out, that was the only question I had.
Mort nodded his approval. It was hard to understand that we didn’t always know what we thought we knew. Questioning everything, being open to the concept that we may believe in facts that weren’t real, was painful. But I was willing to go there.
“Ged was hunting down the remnants of a small faction,” he said. Magicians constantly made deals and formed alliances. Sometimes for nefarious purposes. It kept the Irregulars busy busting them up. “There were only a few left. I was investigating a line of inquiry with their known associates while Ged followed a trace. I don’t know how he managed since the female magician of the duo was skip-transporting.”
My stomach clenched at the thought of transferring from place to place in rapid succession without stopping. It was a way to interrupt a trace when the magician didn’t connect to the right elements to perform a Trace-burn spell. I was so glad I didn’t have to resort to such extreme measures because I would probably puke by the time I made a third transfer.
“And he found them at a tiny gas station in the middle of nowhere,” I said.
“Yes. There was only one car in the lot, and a motorcycle belonging to the employee inside. He was a mundane. When Ged got there, he distance-transferred the man to safety in a nearby town.”
“Oh, wow.” It was policy to evacuate the helpless, but it took serious power to transport another person without going with them. My uncle never ceased to impress me. And he performed that spell in the heat of a chase requiring the constant use of magic depleting his reserves. I wondered if I could ever match his skill level.
“It was already too late for David’s father. The male magician had transferred in too close, and they both died.”
How horrifying. Magicians were careful to use transfer spells in select locations. If they had been skipping around, running from agents of the law such as Armageddon and Mort, they wouldn’t have been looking before they leaped.
“I remember an explosion.”
“Right after Ged arrived,” Mort explained. “The woman was desperate. She just lost her partner in their last transport. She set his body on fire. Ged shifted David’s father out of the store to a safe place up the hill. Your uncle wasn’t sure about his status at the time and needed to get him out of there fast. Then he followed the woman. She had an incredible ability to control Air and Fire. Her balance was eighty percent dark, and she was a true sociopath. She caused the explosion, trying to catch Ged inside when it happened.”
The trembling started again, this time in reaction to the danger Armageddon had faced so many years before. My mind recognized he was fine, he had made it through without a scratch, but a small part of me still lived in that moment, still remembered the heat and the sound of shattering glass and David’s mother screaming.
“David’s mom was terrified,” I said. I felt compelled to speak for the one person who was no longer around to give her report. “She wanted to protect her son and threw his dad’s jacket over him, hiding him.”
Mort rubbed his temple. He looked so grim. And sad. “At that point, three more magicians joined the fray. Armageddon arrived in time to see a flash of light coming from the car right before one of the new arrivals yanked her out through the window, snapping her neck in the process.”
“So it wasn’t Uncle Ged’s fault,” I stated emphatically. I knew it. He never would have hurt the innocent.
“If you asked him, he would tell you it was. Ged takes responsibility for his missions and any collateral damage.”
What an ugly phrase. I hated when we had our classroom discussions about that. It was such a cold, awful way to describe the death of human beings who had done nothing wrong. But it happened, and we needed to be prepared to handle it.
I wasn’t sure if I agreed with my uncle, though. He was right about so many things, but I was in his head and felt how his guilt made him willing to let David punish him. If he had allowed that to happen, my aunt and the rest of us would have been the collateral damage. We would have been the ones who had to live in a world without him, and all the people under his protection rendered vulnerable by his willingness to “take responsibility.”
Not sure how to process that, how to balance it, I heaved a frustrated sigh. I wanted to be as good a person as my uncle. I wanted to accept my responsibilities the way he had done with Peter, saving the child of an enemy who died fighting against him. But I never wanted to be in a place where my guilt got the better of me.
Maybe that wasn’t fair. Armageddon had been drugged and beaten. He was exhausted and not in full control of his faculties by that point. That wasn’t his fault, either.
The anger I felt, the fear of losing the rest of my family, finally dissipated. He didn’t leave us. That’s what mattered.
“Then Uncle Ged caught the remaining magicians,” I said.
“Yes. He vanquished the woman on the spot and sent her to the
Council for processing. The others transferred again. He was worn out and stayed to clean up the mess. Your uncle transported a message, and I came to help. He wanted the area cleared as quickly as possible. Then we hunted down the rest together.”
Irregulars were required to clear away all evidence of a battle. Armageddon had several large warehouses sitting empty, ready to accept the transfer from agents in the field. The rubble would have been pushed into nothingness. That’s why everything had disappeared, and why my uncle used Earth to move David’s mother out of the way next to her husband until everything was over. The deceased were always transferred last when there was time to send them for processing with respect and care.
I leaned back, releasing the tension in my shoulders. “Thanks for telling me, Mort,” I said.
“No problem, kiddo. You needed to know. It’s vital for an agent to have the full story.” He stood and picked up his briefcase. “Go ahead and get ready for supper. I have a few more things to wrap up before we eat.”
“Hey, hold up,” I called. Mort turned back as I rushed to his side. “Have you heard anything about the ambush? When we ended up on the bottom of the river? I thought Oberon was behind it, but I guess it could have been David Novato.”
“Oh, it was the Taines all right. We have all the evidence we need,” he said. The look on his face was the same as my uncle’s when the sky split in two. “Their time has come.”
Mort gave me a curt nod. I watched him go, thinking about how Armageddon wasn’t the only one who was intimidating when he was angry.
I was just glad his fury was on my behalf.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
Surprise
Supper that night was a subdued affair. Probably because I was flat out too drained to steal anything from my uncle’s plate. And Peter had no idea that I was done being a lunatic, so he didn’t talk much. He must have thought being cautious was a good policy for the evening.