“You’re pretty great,” I said enthusiastically, “Did you know that?”
“Oh I’m well aware,” she joked, winking at me, “But I’ll add it to the resume.”
My heart skipped a beat and I found myself just standing there with a stupid grin on my face as she opened the door to the microwave. I probably would have stood there smiling like an idiot for the rest of my life if Connall hadn’t suddenly appeared in the room. I was surprised to see him, as he was supposed to be down at the lake working a shift at the boathouse.
He opened his mouth to speak, but then his eyes fell on Sophie next to me.
“We have to go,” he said, looking at me meaningfully. I knew immediately he meant that my mother was calling a pack meeting, and it was not a call we could ignore. Already, I began to feel the familiar tingling sensation in my arms. Mechanically, Frankie, Milo, and Benji got up from the couch and turned off TV, leaving the room without even saying a word to Sophie.
“What’s happening?” she asked, laughing slightly at the dramatics. Connall gave me a warning look and left the room. The mystical force I felt pulling at me tugged harder.
“I’m sorry, I can’t explain,” I said quickly, involuntarily taking a step away.
“What? Are you serious?” She looked around the room. “All of you really need to go right now? Where? Why?”
“I can’t explain,” I said again, taking another three steps back. She looked down at my moving feet, furrowing her brow.
“That’s fine,” she said, her voice a little high. She avoided my eyes as she dusted off her hands and moved to leave the room.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated, walking with her.
“Don’t worry about it.” She clenched her jaw and I racked my brain for something to say but the overwhelming instinct to join my pack was making it difficult to think of the right words.
We got to her car, and I was practically bouncing to relieve the tension boiling inside me. She opened her door and climbed in, still not looking me in the face. My arm jutted out and stopped her from closing it.
“Sophie I…” I tried to say more but the words escaped me. She sighed and finally looked me in the eyes.
“Can’t tell me?” she guessed, “I can see that. See you later Noah.”
I wanted more than anything to keep her from leaving, to find a way to explain things without scaring her off, but the call to join my pack jerked me back a step. It gave her the space she needed to close the door and without another look at me, she pulled out onto the road.
I forced myself to turn away and broke into a sprint towards the woods. Once I was a safe distance from being seen by someone, I shifted and immediately a discordance of the voices of the pack filled my head.
What’s going on? I asked.
I’m sorry to pull you away from Sophia, my mothers voice came in clear, But I need you to focus on pack matters at this moment. The entire pack no doubt was sensing my anxiety over Sophie leaving. My pain was theirs to feel as well. Her alpha command was not strong enough to quell all my Arrow’s worries about Sophie, but it lessened them enough that I could quiet my mind so as to not fill the head of the others.
Finally I arrived at our clearing in the woods, the typical meeting place for our clan. Large wolves of all colored furs gathered around the circle, my mother sat tall on her rock as she waited for others to arrive. I walked slowly to my place by her side, trying to keep my mind open. The rest of the pack did the same, and soon enough my mother had an attentive audience. She looked at us meaningfully as her voice filled our minds:
I have received news from a trusted friend from the North that in the interim from abandoning our pack, Beau has made his way into Canadian territory. Since his arrival there, there have been two reported incidents of Ripping.
A collective sound of gasps and growls filled my head. Ripping was something so rare that up until now I had only heard of it in my Uncle’s stories. A shifter could change packs through Arrowings, or travel accepted by both Alphas involved. The desertion of the magical bond of a pack completely, however, could only happen one of two ways: being excommunicated by an Alpha, or being Ripped. Though I didn’t understand it entirely, I knew Ripping was painful. The member is essentially broken from the pack through some sort of magic, and its said to feel like your skin is being torn off.
It wasn’t something a shifter typically chose for themselves. Technically, a member could abandon the pack simply by creating distance. Once you get far enough, your Alpha has little power over you and the voices become static. However, if you were to ever return and end up close enough, you would once again be submissive to your pack leader. You can only truly set yourself free through Ripping, but it leaves you feeling hollow. My Uncle’s legends described the Ripped as being rabid and unhinged. Without a pack, they essentially lost their minds.
Our new adversary has not been Ripped himself, my mother spoke through the outcries That much I can tell. But it is believed he is the cause of the two incidents, which means the danger facing us is greater. It means has a witch on his side.
He’s convinced two people to abandon their packs? my uncle asked dubiously.
From what my source believes, my mother took a pause, the Rippings were involuntary.
Again a raucous outburst from all members of the pack filled the air. Involuntary Ripping was not something I would have even thought possible. The process was painful and damaging enough to those who had chosen it, but the idea of how it must feel to be split from your pack- your family, against your will was too excruciating to grasp.
I am as disturbed as you are by the news, my mother silenced us, and we have to consider what this means for the safety of our pack. He has declared war against us and his malicious actions have proven he is not to be underestimated. If he plans to Rip one of our own-
Just then, one of the clan’s newest members, Liam, broke into the circle, his mouth open and panting.
I’m sorry I’m late I was on the other side of town, he thought quickly. I could tell my mother was about to silence him when we all saw the thoughts playing in his head. He looked at me with wide eyes and through his mind I saw his viewing of Sophie barreling down the road, at a reckless and dangerous speed.
Immediately, my Arrow’s protective instinct took over and I whined, shuffling my paws at the sensation to run to her, to stop her before she hurt herself. There was no Alpha command that could quiet me now.
Go, my mother instructed, Try and get to her before she hits someone or something.
I broke off into a run as fast as I could in Sophie’s direction, hoping that I got to her in time.
Chapter Ten
Sophia
My eyes blurred as I felt the tears roll down my face. I wiped them away bitterly; refusing to acknowledge the aching sense of betrayal I was feeling. Instead, I chose to focus on the anger.
What an asshole! I could not believe that after I spent all afternoon baring my soul to him about my mother, he still blatantly hid things from me. I couldn’t understand it. The only explanation I could come up with was that they were doing something illegal, but even then Noah should have known I wouldn’t tell anyone!
I had enough. I could care less what he was doing, even if it was probably dangerous. Immediately I knew that was a lie, as I winced at the thought of Noah getting hurt. I didn’t even know where he was going, or when he’d be back.
I thought I could learn to be okay with Noah’s secrets. I thought I could be patient for the day when he trusted me enough to let me in. I knew now that I was not in the position to be so lenient and indifferent. I needed more.
The car jolted brusquely over a slight bump in the road and I glanced down at my speedometer. Holy shit, how did I not realize how fast I was going? As I eased off the accelerator, I looked up in a panic and was struck by the image of a tall figure jumping into the road ahead of me. I slammed on the brakes as hard as I could, and my arm muscles clenched as I held tightly to the wheel and flinche
d in anticipation.
The car jerked to a stop and my head flew back from the whiplash, smacking against the headrest. Panic coursed through my body and I tried to calm myself with deep breaths as I looked back up at the road. There he was, on the hood of my car, crouching as if he had just pounced on it.
“Noah?” My confusion quickly faded as I was met with a whole new wave of fury. Unclenching my fists from the steering wheel, I turned off the car and undid my seatbelt.
“Noah Mactire, what the hell were you thinking?” I yelled, getting out and slamming the door. I massaged the back of my sore neck as I angrily watched him jump down off the hood of the car.
“Sophie-shit- are you okay?” He reached out to touch me but I slapped his hand away.
“I asked you a question,” I growled through clenched teeth.
“I’m sorry! I really didn’t think you were that close when I stepped out on the road.” He ran a hand through his hair and squinted his gaze back at the trees as if he was calculating something. I stared at him, my mouth agape at how casual he was when I had nearly just run him over. Suddenly he jerked his head back to me, and for the first time since the day we met I saw him look angry. It wasn’t just anger, though. He looked pissed.
“What the hell were you thinking?” He shouted, “You were driving like a maniac! And you get on my case for my driving! Do you have any idea how dangerous that was? Sophie you could’ve killed yourself!”
“I could’ve killed you, you asshole! What are you even doing here in the middle of the road?”
He let out a short and angry burst of air, as if he intended to continue yelling at me. Only he faltered, clearly struggling with an answer to my question.
“I suppose you can’t tell me that either.” I rolled my eyes, trying to fight back the angry tears. I had adrenaline coursing through my body and confusion clouding my mind. It finally dawned on me why Noah wasn’t open and honest with me, and why I felt the desire for him to let me in so badly. It was because I had gone and done what I told myself I wasn’t allowed to do from the day we met: I let myself care for him more than he clearly cared for me.
“I’m tired of this. Goodbye, Noah.” I turned away, my face blushing at the realization.
“I wish I could tell you, Sophie!” He grabbed my arm and pulled me back. “You have no idea how badly I want to just come right out and say it! But it’s not that easy! Please, Sophie, you have to believe me!”
I looked away and fought the tears harder by balling my hands into fists. I shook free from his grasp. “Why should I believe you, Noah? Can you even give me one reason why I should trust you when up until now all you’ve done is lie to me? Huh? One reason.”
"Because! Because!" He spluttered. Frustrated, his eyes narrowed, and a low growl emitted from his throat. Brusquely, he placed his hands on either side of my face and pulled me in, firmly pressing his lips against mine. He kissed me so fiercely and passionately that I when it was over I felt dizzy just trying to make sure my feet were still on the ground.
He breathed out slowly, leaning his forehead against mine.
"Because," he murmured, "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."
➹➹➹
Noah
I stayed very still as I tried to take in what had just happened. I think Sophie and I had just kissed but I wasn’t exactly sure. There had been so many nights when I would wake up and realize it had all been a dream. Then again, this had to be real because even in my wildest imagination I wouldn’t have invented how amazing her lips had felt moving against mine.
“Noah,” she murmured, proving this was all real. Her wistful tone sent a shiver through my body. I took in another deep breath, and nothing could contain the smile that came out when I exhaled.
“Noah,” she said again, only this time her tone was different, “You have no idea how confused I am.”
I pulled back slowly to look into her eyes. I didn’t want to make any sudden movement out of fear that it would scare her off and this moment would be lost forever. “I know,” I said softly, running a thumb across her cheekbone, “I’m sorry about that.”
“I just.” She paused to sigh as she unfortunately pushed back to take a step away from me. “Can you please tell me what is going on?”
“Sophie, it’s…complicated. More than you can imagine.”
“Yeah, and it just got a lot more complicated, don’t you think?” She crossed her arms and bit her lip nervously. “I don’t even know what to think right now! What, um, what are you thinking?”
She was so cute when she stuttered. I looked down and tried to sort through my thoughts. ‘What am I thinking’? It was pretty clear to me there was only one thing on my mind.
“This,” I muttered, as I stepped toward her, pushing her back against her car. I grabbed her waist and pulled her into me, kissing her again. Her hands flew to my face in response as she kissed me back. My knees practically buckled and I could not help the satisfied groan that emitted from my throat at the sensation of her lips fervently moving against mine.
“Wait, wait.” She pulled back suddenly and I leaned my forehead against hers, panting.
“This is what I’m thinking about, Sophie,” I answered honestly, “and I’ve been thinking about this since the moment you first yelled at me at the park. ” She looked into my eyes and her cheeks reddened.
“Me too,” she deadpanned. A shock went through me at that admission and I was sure my mouth would have gaped open if it were not for the fact that her arms went around my neck and she pulled me back down to her mouth. I responded with such enthusiasm that I growled hungrily into her heated kisses. I lifted her up and placed her down on the hood of her car so that our heights were better matched. Her fingers went into my hair and I trembled against her. It was almost too much to take, and I was sure my body was going to completely combust at any second.
The sensation of kissing the person you’ve Arrowed on was difficult to describe. It wasn’t just passion; it was a feeling like every one of your cells was on fire and you’re happy to blissfully burn to death.
Unfortunately, she pulled back again and even went as far as to comically roll over and drop down on the other side of the car.
“What?” I asked nervously, “What’s wrong?”
“You keep distracting me,” she said with a genuine pout. I wanted to bite it.
“Sorry.” I couldn’t help but grin mischievously as I took a small step to move around to her side. She held up her hand like an officer directing traffic.
“Stay there!” she shouted, “And don’t change the subject. I’m serious.”
“Okay.” I held up my hands in surrender. She had a point. I was so drunk on the sensation of kissing her that I wasn’t respecting her emotions, and she deserved to be heard. “What do you want to say?”
“If we’re going to do…this-“ she waved her hand back and forth between us- “If we’re going to do us…” My heart leaped and once again I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my face. This is really happening. Sophie and I are an “us”.
“Stop smiling and pay attention!” she scolded, biting her lip to stop her own smile, “I mean it. If we’re going to go through with this, you have to be honest with me. Okay? No more secrets.”
Of course I expected this. I had just hoped I would have more time with her, particularly now that we were about to be a couple, before risking telling her what I was and scaring her away forever.
She picked up on my hesitation immediately, and threw her hands in the air.
“This is ridiculous!” She laughed bitterly. “You still won’t tell me!”
“Okay! OKAY!” I held up my hands again, “I’ll tell you.” She straightened up as she waited expectantly. “Just, please Sophie, not right now,” I finished.
She ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “You must think I’m an idiot.”
“Sophia Rose, I swear I will tell you everything you want to know. I just can’t…at this
moment,” I finished lamely. It wasn’t a good excuse but thankfully her expression softened a little. “Okay?”
She crossed her arms and chewed on her lip. Panic set in, and I jumped over the hood of the car, wrapping my arms around her and hugging her tightly.
“Please say that’s okay,” I whispered.
“Okay,” she mumbled into my neck. Relief flooded through me. I took my finger under her chin and tilted her head up to me, pressing my lips against hers softly. Our previous kisses had been heated and frenzied but this one was new: unhurried and tender. I couldn’t decide which kind I liked best.
“So,” she said, “What now?”
“Want to get some coffee?” I offered, brushing some hair out of her eyes. She smiled and nodded. Mirroring her grin, I opened the passenger door and gestured for her to get in.
“This is my car.” She frowned at me in confusion.
“I know,” I said, walking around to the driver side, “And you almost just killed me driving it.”
Chapter Eleven
Sophia
I selected a booth in the corner of Bean There Done That while Noah waited at counter to pick up our coffees. My pulse was still slightly racing from the dramatics on the road and I felt butterflies in my stomach from the sudden progression of our relationship. They were happy butterflies, but I still felt uneasy for having not resolved Noah’s issue with secrecy.
“For you, Sophia Rose,” he murmured as he placed my cardboard cup down in front of me. I smiled down at the two sugar packets he had positioned on the lid. Somehow, he knew exactly how I took my coffee. Another thought possessed me and I pursed my lips in wonder.
He sat down across from me and took a slow sip from his coffee, his eyes watching me over the lid. When he swallowed he licked his lips and smiled nervously. “What is it?”
“I’ve just realized you either call me Sophia Rose or Sophie. It’s either my full name or a nickname. Why is it that you’ve never called me Sophia?”
He looked down at his coffee and raised a shoulder. “When you first told me your name you said most people called you Sophia.”
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