Heaven's Loss (Hell Yeah!)

by Sable Hunter

  “Awww, come on!” She edged sideways and grabbed his hand. “I’ve always wanted to try. We could do a duet. Don’t Go Breaking My Heart would be a good one. Do you know it?”

  He didn’t know if it was her contagious exuberance or the amazing twinkle of happiness in her eyes, but Canyon found himself relenting. “Maybe. If the opportunity ever arises…” Hopefully it wouldn’t. “We’ll see.”

  “Yea, you bet your booty we’ll see.” She rubbed her hands together as if she were plotting high crimes and misdemeanors. “This will be fun!”

  A rush of pure happiness filled Canyon’s chest. This was it. This was what he’d been missing. He couldn’t remember feeling this happy and lighthearted since before Matty had received his devastating diagnosis. “Yea, it’s going to be a blast.”

  After eating, they rode the high all the way into the parking lot of Isaac’s club. Once there, the sight that met their eyes made Seren scream and Canyon curse in fury. “Goddammitt!”

  Taking his phone, he called 9-1-1. “Send the fire department. A trailer house is on fire behind Isaac McCoy’s Hardbodies club.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  “I am so sorry,” Seren hugged Avery. “I should have been here to put out the fire.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Avery exclaimed, waving her hand toward the club. “Hardbodies is untouched. Believe me, this could have been much worse – you could’ve been injured.”

  “Still…it was my responsibility.” Seren looked at the charred shambles of the trailer. Now, she really had nothing. All of her clothes and even the money she’d saved – all of it was gone. Glancing up at the smoke-filled sky, Seren wondered if Gregori was sending her another message, telling her in an indisputable way that it was time to pull up stakes and leave. Move away from Canyon, from all she held dear. “I don’t know how the fire started, but maybe I could’ve prevented it.”

  “Nonsense,” Isaac muttered, having overheard her comment. “The trailer was old. There’s no telling what might have happened. Besides, the insurance money I’ll receive will be more than that hunk of junk trailer was worth.” He glanced around. “Actually, it will look a helluva lot better back here without it.”

  Avery looked concerned. “But what about you, Seren?” She rubbed her forehead, deep in thought. “You could stay in our quarters in the club until…”

  “That’s not necessary.” Seren placed her hand on Avery’s arm in gratitude.

  “No, it’s not necessary,” Canyon agreed, stepping from behind Seren. “She has a place to go.”

  “Oh, really?” Avery smiled as Seren blushed.

  “Canyon is being kind,” she muttered. And hardheaded.

  “Excellent.” Avery leaned in. “Have him read one of my books.”

  “Oh, my goodness.” She covered her cheeks with her hands. With any luck, Avery would think the heat in her face was a result of the idea of Canyon reading hot sex scenes and not the sight of his glistening muscles as he peeled off his sweat soaked shirt.

  “McCoy! Brady!”

  The sound of a man’s voice drew their attention. Sheriff Kane Saucier was making his way through the remaining firemen who were rolling up hoses and climbing back on their trucks.

  “Kane.” Isaac waved his friend over. “What’s the word?”

  “The fire marshal says its arson. They found accelerant in the debris. Gasoline. Any idea who might have done this?”

  “Diego Valencia.” Canyon stated the name with sure certainty. “He’s been harassing Seren.”

  “Well, why is this the first I’m hearing of it?” Sheriff Saucier asked dryly.

  “Yea, I’m wondering the same thing,” Isaac commented with a possessive hand on Avery’s shoulder.

  Canyon sighed and nodded at Isaac. “I intended to talk to you tomorrow. I had no idea it would escalate to this degree.”

  “It’s my fault,” Seren spoke up, stepping forward. “I asked Canyon not to say anything. I was stupid.” She shook her head. “I just never thought he’d go this far.”

  “Why don’t you tell me what’s been going on,” Kane Saucier directed gently.

  “After serving him drinks, he told me he’d eventually get me alone. A few days later he cornered me in the hall.”

  “I interrupted that little encounter,” Canyon added, “told him he would have to go through me. I’ve been watching out for her ever since.”

  “Has he been back to bother you?” Kane asked.

  Canyon answered for her, “We’ve seen Diego on the premises. Not getting out of his truck, just lurking.”

  “Well, this is a public place,” the Sheriff muttered, “but I could’ve scheduled some cars to do a check every few hours if I’d known.”

  Pointing up at the corner of the club, Isaac grinned. “I have cameras. I don’t know if they’ll catch him lighting the fire, but we might be able to put him at the scene.”

  As Kane and Isaac walked over to check the cameras, Seren let out a long breath. “I guess this is about over, thank goodness.”

  “It’ll be over when that bastard is behind bars.” Canyon looked into the distance, watching the traffic, wondering if the night shielded the criminal returning to the scene of the crime.

  “That’s what I meant.” Seren hugged herself, feeling chilled despite the heat still emanating from the burned-out trailer.

  Avery noticed her action and read the reason. “Don’t leave before I get back.” She took off for the inside of the club.

  As soon as she walked away, Canyon came closer to Seren. “You need to rest. I’ll take you home in just a few minutes.”

  “Okay.” Seren was literally too tired to argue. Tomorrow, she’d figure everything out. “I just don’t understand. Why would someone do this?”

  “Because he’s fuckin’ crazy, that’s why.” He placed a protective hand on the small of her back. “Don’t worry. You’re not alone.” Facing her, he placed his thumb beneath her chin, tilting Seren’s face up to his. “You’ve had my full attention from the moment I heard your voice asking me what was my pleasure.”

  Seren felt her cheeks grow hot, but she was saved from responding when the Sheriff began to call her name, “Ms. Whitewing?”

  “Yes.” She turned to greet him, remembering the day he’d come to her rescue after being hit by the car in the parking lot. “Did you find something on the camera?”

  “I did. I’ll need you to come in tomorrow to make a statement. From what I saw on Isaac’s surveillance system, I have enough to put out a warrant for Valencia’s arrest.”

  “Okay.” Seren nodded. “I’ll be there.”

  “I’ll bring her in first thing in the morning,” Canyon promised.

  About that time, Avery returned with a bag. “I packed some things for you.” She placed a blue jean jacket around Seren’s shoulders. “Now, you won’t be so cold.”

  “Thank you, Avery.” Her voice broke a bit. “Seems like I’m always having to take a hand-out. And again, I’m so sorry. If you’d rather I turn in my resignation now…”

  “Hush up, girl.” She shook a finger at Seren and gave Canyon a wink. “That is not the way we do things around here. I need you tomorrow. We’ve got to get ready for Halloween. There’s decorating to be done!” A buzz from her cell phone drew Avery’s attention. “Canyon, tell Isaac I have to go pick up David from Jacob’s. Jessie says little Bowie has a fever and she’s taking him to the clinic.” A worried look came over Avery’s face. “I hate it when one of the babies get sick.”

  “I’ll do it,” Canyon promised. “Is there anything else we can do?”

  “No, I’m sure it’s just a bug going around.” She patted Seren on her arm. “Wait until you have children, it’s always something.”

  “Be careful and thank you,” Seren said as Avery took off.

  “Come on. We’re outta here.” Canyon took her hand to lead Seren through the maze of people still milling around the crime scene.

  She went with him, noting his demean
or had changed in the last few moments. Seren didn’t have to be told why. Every time he heard a child was sick, his mind went straight to Matty. “I know you miss him.”

  “Yea.” Still clutching her hand, he stepped ahead to guide Seren between closely parked cars. “Always.”

  “You’re young. You’ll fall in love again…”

  “Don’t,” Canyon barked out the word, coming to a halt at the passenger side of his truck. “I don’t intend to fall in love.” Even as he said the words they didn’t ring true. Pushing aside those phantom feelings, he repeated the idea he’d held onto for so long. “I have needs, any man does – but I can’t afford to care.” This confession was made as he helped her into the truck and fastened her seat belt. “Friendship is all I have to offer.”

  Seren’s heart went out to him. She bit her tongue to keep from telling him how he’d confessed his love for her.

  “I love you.”

  “What did you say?”

  “I mean it, Seren. I think I’ve loved you from the first moment I laid eyes on you.”

  “I love you too.” The gift of Canyon’s love, a gift she would’ve died for – coming too late. “I’ll always love you. I’ll never regret loving you.”

  “I won’t let you regret it. There’ll never be another day when I don’t show you how much I love you, Seren. I’m not sure how we’re going to work all of this out – but we will. Aside from my Matty, your love is the most wonderful gift I’ve ever received. I’ll never understand the miracle of how you came to me – all I know is that Heaven’s loss is my gain.”

  “Your friendship is pretty amazing,” she told him once he was settled behind the wheel.

  “I’m not sure about that.” He started the engine and backed out of the still crowded parking lot. “I just know I could never bring another child into the world. I’m not capable of loving anyone like that ever again. There are some losses you can never recover from.”

  More than anyone, Seren understood. She’d been with him every step of the way. She’d seen how he suffered. She’d sheltered him in her love when he’d held that pistol in his hand and considered taking his own life. “We can’t know for certain what the future holds for us. We just have to have faith.”

  Canyon chose not to debate the issue. He’d lost his faith, he didn’t really believe in anything anymore. Glancing over at her, he could see how tired she looked. “Things will look better tomorrow. I have a guest room. My house isn’t anything to brag about but you’ll be comfortable.”

  “I’m sure I will.”

  Once they arrived, Seren was hit by a wave of nostalgia. This was where she’d been the happiest. Every place she looked…she could see them. Walking through the yard hand in hand. Standing together on the porch. Laughing in the kitchen.

  Making love in his bed.

  “Very nice,” Seren whispered as she followed him from room to room. She looked for some trace of the time she shared with him – but she could see nothing. It was like those days never happened – yet…here she was again. The realization made her shiver.

  “You’re cold. Let me put a fire in the fireplace.”

  “No.” She touched his arm. “It’s late. You have to work in the morning and this has been a hard day for you.”

  Canyon raked a hand through his hair. “You’re right. You’re tired too.” He picked up the bag Avery gave her and started toward the back. “Come with me.”

  Seren followed him, her eyes caressing his big body as he moved. She loved the way he looked. So broad. So solid. He was her rock. Her sanctuary. Seren longed to reach out and touch him, to make him remember. To keep herself in check, she put her hands behind her back. “This is so nice of you.”

  “Remember, we were going to do something like this before the fire. Now, that we know for sure what kind of maniac we’re dealing with, there’s no way I’m going to leave you alone. You’re stuck with me for the duration.” He opened the door and showed her inside.

  Everything looked the same. “This is perfect.”

  He placed the bag on a bench at the end of the bed. “Good. I’m glad. The bathroom is next door. I’m at the end of the hall if you need anything else.”

  Seren’s breathing grew labored. Memories of them together swirled around her so thick she could barely take in air. “I’ll be fine.” He started to walk away and she found she couldn’t let him go. “Canyon…”

  “Yea?” He froze, his whole being responding to the longing in her voice.

  “Thank you.” She closed the gap between them, wrapping her arms around him for a heart-stopping hug.

  “You’re welcome, honey.” Canyon only hesitated a second before enclosing her in a tight embrace. “God, you feel good.”

  His whispered admission made it hard to pull away, but she had no choice. Watcher she might be no longer, but protecting him was still her highest priority. “Sleep well,” she told him, moving back to put a few inches of distance between them.

  “You too.” Canyon nodded to Seren, then turned to leave, shutting the door behind him. As attracted as he was to Seren, he knew now wasn’t the time to make a move. Too much had happened. A satisfied smile played on his lips. She was under his roof and that made him happy on several levels. Still, an odd tingling pervaded his chest as he made his way to his room. Canyon felt as if he’d missed something.

  Something important.

  Behind the closed door, Seren sank to the bed, covering her face with her hands. Everything seemed to be spiraling out of control. Here she was – back where she started from. Truly, there was nowhere she’d rather be…but Gregori’s warning tormented her. After wiping a few tears from her cheeks, she stared out the window, trying to find some peace in the situation. Even though Canyon seemed to be aware of a connection between them on some level, he certainly didn’t remember her.

  Or recognize her – of course, she was unrecognizable.

  Seren raised a shaking hand to her face. In times past, she’d never been concerned about her looks. She always took her appearance for granted. Now, since her eyes had been opened, she was aware of her shortcomings – and regretted them. Why Canyon seemed so drawn to her, she didn’t know. “It doesn’t matter. We’re just friends. Remember?” She couldn’t afford for them to be anything else.

  After readying herself for bed, Seren crawled between the covers to find solace in sleep.

  Even as her dreams soared among the stars, her heart remained with Canyon.

  …Down the hall, Canyon laid in the bed, staring at the ceiling. Walking away from Seren had been damn difficult. His body demanded to be one with her. It was as if it knew what he was missing. “Fuck.” He ran a restless hand over his body, all the way down to cup his cock. Closing his eyes, he began to stroke himself, his legs moving restlessly, his hips bucking. The object of his desire was just down the hall. He knew – somehow, he knew how amazing being with her would be. “Oh, yea. You’re so soft. So wet. Hot. Tight.” Faster and faster, he fisted himself, squeezing his hungry shaft until he could hold back the pleasure no longer. “Seren, God, Seren!” he groaned as jets of milky cum splashed on his stomach. For a few seconds, he laid still, breathing heavily, tiny earthquakes of ecstasy echoing through his body.

  After a while, Canyon rose and made his way to the bathroom to clean up. “I need my head examined,” he grumbled to himself. There was a beautiful woman lying a few dozen yards away who’d just pressed her gorgeous body against his, a woman he was in serious lust with – and he was alone in his room jacking off.

  But she only wanted to be his friend.

  So, she said.

  “Hell, that’s not the vibe I’m getting off her.”

  After finishing in the restroom, he made his way back to bed. Padding across the floor, he rubbed his face, realizing how tired he felt. “This has been a helluva day.” Between running into Seren, Bull’s emergency surgery, then having Seren’s trailer burn to the ground – it was no wonder he couldn’t think clearly.

>   While stretching out with a grateful groan, he pulled the covers up over his body, recalling how he’d lost it after hearing one of the McCoy children had taken ill. “Man…” he groaned again, trying to remember what he’d said to Seren. Even though she’d played the friends card first, he certainly reinforced the idea with his commitment phobic rant.

  Throwing his arm over his eyes, Canyon tried to relax. Jacking-off usually did it for him, but not this time. He felt edgy. Uneasy. Like things were unsettled and he didn’t know how to make it right. Filtering through his thoughts, he admitted it wasn’t Bull’s surgery worrying him, it wasn’t his workload, it wasn’t even how much he missed his son.

  No, this unsettled feeling was completely due to the woman who’d walked into his world and turned it topsy-turvy. Canyon couldn’t explain the desperate drawing he felt toward her, he only knew it was there. Come to think of it, she’d shared very little of her own story. He knew she was starting over with nothing, had no family to speak of, and had just ended a relationship with a no-count man who wasn’t worthy to lick her boots.

  “If she belonged to me… Whoa.”

  Canyon brought himself up short. What was wrong with him? He certainly wasn’t practicing what he preached. Truth be told, he should back off and let her heal. Undoubtedly, his interference was only adding to her confusion. Yet…he couldn’t bear to leave her unprotected. He also couldn’t stand the thought of turning over responsibility for her safety to someone else.

  No. When you wanted something done right, it was better to do it yourself.

  “Face it, Brady. You’re greedy. You want to be around her – period.”

  For so long he’d punished himself for being alive when Matty was dead. Enjoying himself. Having fun. Living life to the fullest seemed like a sacrilege – a betrayal. Up to this point, he’d never been tempted to forsake his exile and return to the land of the living. It was different with Seren, however. With her, it didn’t seem wrong. There was no denying it, Canyon wanted whatever time with her he could have. He wanted to do all the things they’d planned – and more.