by Sarah Noffke
I can do that. Lunis chuckled. Say something about their mom. They probably all have the same one.
I don’t think spiders care what you say about their mom, Sophia argued.
It’s worth a shot, Lunis offered as she darted for the last of the bombs. The closest spider tried to cut her off, leaping in her direction and shooting a strand of silk at her. She ducked and kicked the creature like a football, knocking it into the trunk of the tree that was its home.
It squeaked as it landed on the ground next to the two dozen spiders who remained, their red eyes all on Sophia. She bounced the last remaining bombs in her hand, knowing she needed to make the last attack spot on or risk being eaten alive.
“Hey, where’s your momma?” Sophia asked, which made all the spiders tense. They tilted their heads in unison, their eyes enlarging like they wanted to hear what she was going to say next. “Yo momma is so fat, she can’t even jump to conclusions.”
Oh, no. Lunis growled in disappointment.
What? Sophia questioned as the spiders scampered forward, none of them dying.
Try again, the dragon encouraged.
“Fine,” Sophia began, pulling her arm back and launching one of the bombs. It landed in the middle of the horde, exploding a dozen spiders and sending guts all over her boots. She sneered. “Yo momma’s so stupid, she stared at a cup of orange juice for twelve hours because it said, ‘concentrate.’”
Wow, that was bad, Lunis said.
I’m sort of busy right now, she argued, firing her last bomb through the fire and exploding another dozen spiders. There were only about ten left, but Sophia was out of bombs, and her insults didn’t seem to be working.
She backed over to her sword and they all copied her movement.
“Yo momma…” Sophia began, kneeling, her arm outstretched.
Before she could think of her next insult, something bigger than all the rest of the spiders surfaced from the burrow. It seemed to have trouble pushing itself through the hole, its legs long, and its body the size of a beach ball. The thing was hairier than the others, its face elongated, and its red eyes large and menacing.
“Whoa!” Sophia said, nearly tripping over her feet as she backed up. She looked the large spider over. “Yo momma is so ugly, she makes you all look adorable.”
Chapter Eighty-Four
The ground shook under Sophia when the ginormous spider took a step forward, its pincers working.
That is one ugly spider, Lunis declared.
Tell me about it, Sophia said, landing in bug guts with her next step. This seemed to add insult to injury, and the momma spider scuttled forward, moving fast across the dirt.
Sophia barely had enough time to bring up Inexorabilis before the spider was on her. Its pincers were inches from her throat when she threw up her blade.
She held her sword like a shield, trying to push the beast back by kicking its large body. Its legs reached for her on either side of the blade, but it didn’t try to come any closer.
There’s something about the sword that repels it, Lunis stated.
Sophia waved the blade like a torch, and sure enough, the spider retreated a few inches.
“Hey, Momma, you’re so ugly that if you threw a boomerang, it would refuse to come back,” Sophia said, swinging Inexorabilis and making the monster jump back to avoid getting cut.
I don’t think insults work on Momma, Lunis suggested. Or maybe your jokes are just not good enough to be offensive.
Sophia spied the spider sending a shot of silk in her direction just in time to dive out of the way. It hit the fire, putting it out completely. She rolled over and sprang to her feet.
So she doesn’t like Inexorabilis, Sophia mused, trying to figure out her options. She didn’t have any more bombs or fire.
You can call your trusty dragon, Lunis hinted.
He’s busy eating a steak dinner, she replied. And he’s way over there on the other side of the Outback.
He could come back in a few seconds, he promised.
And what, take all the fun? Sophia said, feigning to one side and trying to throw Momma off. The spider didn’t fall for the trick and instead thrust one of her many long legs into Sophia’s side with surprising force and making her hit the side of the tree with a thud. That was the source of her current dilemma.
That’s going to leave a mark, Lunis said.
Sophia shook her head and tried to push up but found Momma bearing down on her, literally breathing down her neck.
“Hey,” Sophia said nervously, smelling the rancid breath of the beast that was about to slit her neck. The impact with the tree had been more than disorienting, and Sophia realized she’d dropped her sword.
Her fingers scrabbled through the dirt, finding only bug guts. She whimpered as the spider bore closer to her, its pincers making promises she couldn’t understand but got the gist of.
Soph, Lunis said, a question in his voice, you still got this?
She shook her head erratically.
“No!” she exclaimed, abandoning all attempts to be a lone badass. “Help, Lunis!”
She expected it would take him a bit to rescue her. Momma would sink her teeth into her and that would be the end of it, but before she even had a chance to suck in a breath, the giant spider was hurled off her.
Sophia caught a glimpse of her blue dragon, the body of the spider in his mouth, before he jerked his head up and to the side, releasing Momma. She landed fifty feet away on the red earth in a cloud of dust and exploded, green goo spraying around her, sending a rancid smell through the hot air.
Chapter Eighty-Five
Ragged breath spilled over Sophia’s cracked lips, making her chest rise and fall rapidly as she tried to process what had just happened.
Lunis glanced over his shoulder as the mound of spider melted into the earth, steam rising up from the carcass. Casually he turned back to Sophia, a sly grin on his face.
“How long had you been there, waiting for me to ask for help?” she asked.
“Since pretty much the beginning, lurking in the shadows,” he replied.
Pushing up, she tried to dust herself off, to no effect. “There aren’t any shadows to lurk in around here.”
He nodded. “Yeah, it’s probably the middle of the day,” he observed. The sun was high in the blue sky, not a cloud in sight.
“You didn’t think I could do it?” Sophia asked, covering her nose against the putrid smell that filled the air. The dead spider bodies were starting to cook, between the hot ground under them and the scorching rays of the Australian Outback sun above. “You didn’t think I could take out the colony of spiders?” She couldn’t keep the offense out of her voice.
“Of course, I did,” he argued, looking around. “And you obviously did just fine on your own, judging by this aftermath. Do you think we can eat spider? Because if so, we’ve got food for days. Maybe we jelly them. How do you think spider jam tastes on toast?”
Sophia grimaced. “Ew, that sounds horrible. I refuse to eat spiders, and besides, we don’t have any toast.”
Sensing she was still upset, Lunis centered his attention on her. I knew you’d be okay on your own—
“Okay?” she questioned. “Like I’d get by until I needed you to rescue me?”
Sophia couldn’t help it. She knew she was being unreasonable, but it felt right to her. Maybe it was the heat or the hunger or the thirst or the fact her leg was throbbing. She suddenly remembered being bitten and jerked her attention down. Her pants were torn where the teeth of the spider had sunk into her flesh. Green goo swam around the bloody wound in her leg. It didn’t look good. Maybe it was the sight of her injury or the poison from the spider, but something made her head swim suddenly with dizziness.
Sophia, I knew you could handle the spiders, Lunis said, his voice comforting, his attention on her wound. But we are supposed to be able to rely on each other. That’s what I’m there for—to help.
Sophia took a step and instantly regretted
it. The lack of adrenaline made the pain in her leg fully apparent. “You never need me to save you, Lunis!”
I haven’t yet, he reasoned. But we have many years for that to change. We’re a partnership. I can’t do things you can and vice versa. So what that I stepped in at the last moment and saved you? You cleared a hundred spiders on your own using your ingenious bomb-making skills and quick thinking.
Sophia gave him an annoyed expression. “I insulted them with yo momma jokes.”
But you figured out one of their weaknesses, Lunis said.
“Yeah, I guess,” Sophia said with a sigh, not at all feeling better.
What do you want me to say? Lunis asked, his expression hard. She knew he was exhausted too, but for different reasons. His belly was full, and his body was used to extreme heat. Because she was connected to the dragon, she knew he was taxed from worry about her, having to watch her battle the spiders and stay back until she asked for help. This just made her angrier.
“I want you to tell me the truth,” she argued. “You didn’t think I could handle the momma spider by myself.”
Lunis shook his head. You know what’s in my head. Do you really hear me saying that?
Sophia studied him, realizing that his mind was completely open for her to explore. She had tiptoed through his mind many a time, but usually only went as far as to read the thoughts he supplied her. When they scried, she saw what he saw. But in this rare instance, she had full access to his mind. And there it was, sitting neatly on top.
Sophia bit her lip and tasted blood. Her skin was already painfully cracked from the heat. “You thought I would need your help to defeat her.”
I thought you could handle her, Lunis argued. But to defeat her, yes. I thought after battling her children, you’d need some help. It doesn’t mean you couldn’t do it, but you might have gotten seriously injured.
She threw her hand at her injured leg. “What do you call this? I’m trapped in the Outback with a poisonous bite and a dragon who doesn’t think I can fight on my own! And it smells horrible!”
That’s because someone got bug guts everywhere, Lunis said with a laugh in his mental voice.
His attempt at humor wasn’t going to work on Sophia right then. She swung around and charged off for the lake, needing some space.
Soph! Lunis called after her.
She didn’t turn around. Right then, she needed to be alone. She needed to figure out why she was so angry. And she needed to fix her leg…without magic.
Chapter Eighty-Six
It didn’t matter that Sophia knew she was being unreasonable. Her ego was instigating this fight, the first one she’d ever had with her dragon. And yet, there was nothing she could tell herself to just get over it.
She dragged herself to the lake without turning around even though she could feel Lunis staring at her retreating back.
They needed each other in the Australian Outback. They needed to bond to pass the training—more so than ever before. They needed one another to survive the week.
The issue was that she firmly believed Lunis would survive fine without her. Sophia felt like the weak link. She was the one who needed her dragon in order to survive, and it made her feel entirely worthless.
She settled down on a rock next to a clear shore of fresh water and hesitated before submerging her leg. Sophia was aware there could be all sorts of flesh-eating bacteria in the water. Or as was more in line with her luck, piranhas were probably swimming around, waiting to chew off her leg once she stuck it into the lake.
It was throbbing with so much pain she really couldn’t handle it any longer. Ripping her pant leg all the way up to the knee, Sophia nearly passed out at the sight of the bite. It was oozing with green slime and quickly swelling.
She refused to look back over to the tree where she knew Lunis was stationed, regarding her like a lost puppy. Sophia didn’t want her puppy. She wanted not to need her puppy. She wanted her puppy to need her a tiny bit.
Sophia was the vulnerable human, who might have extra magical powers thanks to those she’d inherited from her twin, but they did her no good out in the Australian Outback when she wasn’t allowed to use magic. She sighed with defeat.
She was just a girl here. Nothing special. No unique talents. Just a plain, old girl.
“Without magic, I’m just a loser,” she said, sinking her leg into the water and finding it strangely cool even though the heat outside was so high. The water wrapped around her wound and instantly provided relief.
“Without water, I’m a total loser,” a voice said in front of Sophia.
Her eyes snapped open. She hadn’t even realized they were closed or that she was close to dozing off, the sun making her lightheaded.
She searched around, thinking maybe it was Lunis talking, although the voice was higher pitched than his.
He was still by the tree and currently kicking around in the dirt and launching bits of spider carcasses across the Outback—apparently letting off steam, which ironically was spiraling through the air, coming from the body parts littering the ground.
Yanking her focus back in the direction of the voice, Sophia looked around until she found a pair of eyes resting above the water, a long tail swooshing back and forth a little behind it.
She pulled up her legs, worried she was about to be eaten by the crocodile swimming in the water before her. To her shock, it smiled at her, its eyes not at all appearing hungry like she would have thought.
I’m not going to eat you, the crocodile sent to her mind as if it had read her thoughts. I don’t want to die.
Sophia’s leg hurt outside the water, and since she was hallucinating, she sank it back down into the cool lake. “Who are you?” she asked. Talking to a crocodile was not the strangest thing to happen to her that day, one in which she made homemade bombs from a eucalyptus tree and fought a hundred large spiders. Oh, and had an argument with a dragon. Her life was so bizarre.
I’m Smeg, the crocodile replied. I mean, I go by many different names, but that’s the one the Beaufonts know me by.
Sophia knew she was hallucinating badly, but she decided to embrace it. Why not, she thought. She was going to die in the Australian Outback from a spider bite, talking to a croc.
“Beaufonts?” she asked, thinking it would be fun and take her mind off her pain to indulge the croc. This hallucination, fueled by her imagination, was probably going to be pretty entertaining. “You’ve met others in my family?”
Well, most recently, Warrior Liv Beaufont in the swamps of Louisiana, Smeg answered.
Sophia shook her head. How dumb her subconscious was that it hadn’t figured out this horrible logistic issue with its hallucination. “If you recently met Liv in Louisiana, how are you here in the Australian Outback? Did you fly?”
He chuckled. Don’t be ridiculous. I’m a crocodile. Of course, I can’t fly.
“Right, what was I thinking,” she said, shaking her head. “So, how did you get here?”
Magic, he answered. I go wherever I think I’ll find the most entertaining conversations. You see, that’s usually what I’m after. Have you heard any fun facts lately? I really like learning things. Oh, and I like words. My new favorite one is “conundrum.” Just say it. It feels funny on your tongue.
Sophia gave him a questioning expression. “You’re a very strange croc.”
He nodded, water splashing up around his head. It’s true. I’m the strangest. Not like the other crocodiles. None of them talk to me, but they are boring anyway. Most of them never travel.
Sophia shook her head, her mouth parched. “You’re a magical crocodile who talks and travels, is that right?”
Yes, and you’re a dying magician on a walkabout in the Australian Outback, right? he asked.
Sophia laughed morbidly. “You’ve figured me out.”
I love playing these kinds of guessing games, Smeg said, circling around in the water and obviously excited to have made a new friend.
“Yeah, it’s a del
ightful game,” Sophia said, looking longingly at the water.
I wouldn’t drink the lake water, Smeg offered like he knew what she was thinking. He was a figment of her imagination, so what did it matter.
“Why?” Sophia questioned. “Because it’s going to kill me?”
Exactly, he answered.
“As you previously mentioned, that’s not so much a problem for me since I’ve been bitten by a poisonous spider and will probably die from it,” Sophia stated dully, swaying slightly.
Oh, that’s not why I thought you were going to die. Smeg’s eyes darted to Sophia’s leg and he grimaced. Tough luck on the bite. Yeah, you’ll probably die from that, but not before you are eaten by the hungry dragon over there. That was why I wasn’t going to try to eat you. I didn’t want the dragon to get mad at me for taking his meal. Oh, well, and you’re more use to me as a conversationalist than as food.
Sophia followed his gaze and saw Lunis still stalking her from a distance. “Oh, that’s my dragon. I don’t think he’s going to kill me. Maybe, though. I did yell at him.”
Oh, I didn’t realize it was a domestic dispute, Smeg said. Yeah, he’s probably going to kill you. Domestic stuff gets the most out of control. Believe me, I know.
Sophia couldn’t help but laugh. “How do you know?”
I’m a good listener, Smeg offered. Anyway, yeah, you’ll probably die from the bite first. Within the day. I can tell your sister Warrior Beaufont if you want, if she visits a large body of water soon. Do you know what her travel plans are?
Sophia gripped her leg, the pain starting to shoot upward. “Sorry, I’m not aware of her upcoming plans. Right now, I’m more concerned about funeral arrangements.”
Well, you don’t have to die, Smeg offered. I have a solution.
That got Sophia’s attention. “I don’t want to die. What can I do?”
Use magic, Smeg said with satisfaction.
Sophia laid back on the rock and looked up at the blue sky. “Yeah, well, I guess I’ll die.”