“Esther,” he said as she approached. “I’m so happy to see you.” He gently touched her arm and motioned for her to sit on the bench he had been using. “Please have a seat. I hope this is acceptable. I thought it would be more private than meeting in the house.”
Esther sat down, and Allan sat across from her. “I had such a wonderful time last night, Esther,” he said.
“Oh, I did too, Allan,” she exclaimed. “Thank you so much for the dances.” And for the kiss. As she spoke, she could immediately feel herself becoming aroused.
Allan smiled, and said “I brought you here to talk to you about something, and this meeting must be brief.”
“What is it?” Esther asked.
“I want to make sure that we both have the same feelings about this. I am very interested in you, and I wish to court you,” Allan said.
Esther was so happy, and said, “Oh, I would like that very much.”
Allan smiled widely. “Perfect,” he said. “I’m sorry that I can’t spend more time with you during this trip, but I have spoken to Edward this morning. He and Mary will host a dinner party in two weeks time, and my intentions are to be here for that. I hope that you will be, too.”
Esther nodded and smiled. “I haven’t seen Mary yet this morning, but I certainly wouldn’t miss any opportunity to spend time with you.”
“You have made me a very happy man,” Allan said. “I’m so sorry I won’t be able to stay longer, now, but I am looking forward to seeing you in two weeks.”
“As am I,” Esther replied.
Allan stood. He looked her directly in the eyes, and said, “Until next time. I will count the days until I see you again.” She stared deeply into his green eyes and her heart felt as if it were about to burst. She nodded, and then he turned and began to walk down the path towards the house.
Esther sat and took a moment to let what happened sink in. She and Allan were officially courting, and she couldn’t be happier. She then turned towards Rose, who smiled widely, and said “Let’s go tell my sisters.”
* * *
It had been a week since the ball, and Allan was struggling to focus on his work. All he could think about was being with Esther again.
He was sitting at his desk looking through paperwork, but his thoughts were far from his office. Instead, he kept thinking about the ball, the interaction he and Esther had following the ball, and even the brief meeting they had in the rose garden. He was more sure than ever before that he had made the right choice.
“My Lord?”
Allan looked up and Clark was standing in the doorway.
“You have an unexpected visitor. A Miss Bridget Crampton has arrived along with her chaperone, Mrs. Dunn.”
“What?” Allan couldn’t believe that he was hearing this. “Did you say Miss Bridget Crampton?”
“Yes, My Lord,” Clark replied. “She and Mrs. Dunn are in the sitting room.”
“Fine,” Allan replied. “Please tell them I will see them shortly.”
“Yes, My Lord,” Clark said before leaving the room.
Allan couldn’t possibly imagine why Bridget would come to his home. He had never formally invited her, nor had he contacted her since they had met and taken their walk together. Could that be the reason? Was something wrong with her father? He wasn’t sure, but he would see her and make sure that she knew that he was courting Esther. That would, for all intents and purposes, show her that he wasn’t interested in her in a romantic way.
He made his way to the sitting room, and Clark was waiting in the hallway outside of the door. The men nodded at each other, and Allan walked in. He saw Mrs. Dunn, first, and then saw Bridget sitting in a chair near the center of the room. She stood when she saw him.
“Allan!” she said with excitement in her voice. “It’s so wonderful to see you!”
He was confused. She seemed happy, so her visit couldn’t be related to bad news.
“It is nice to see you, too,” Allan said, though with much less excitement. “I’m surprised, though.”
Bridget nodded. “I know, and I’m very sorry for not letting you know that I was coming.” He noticed that her demeanor had changed. “The truth is, I need to talk to you about something. It’s something important.”
“Fine,” Allan replied. “Please, have a seat. Would you care for something to drink?”
“No, thank you,” Bridget replied as she sat back down. “I won’t be long.”
Allan nodded. “Please, what would you like to say?”
Bridget took a deep breath, and Allan noticed that she suddenly seemed nervous or frightened.
“I haven’t been totally truthful to you,” Bridget said. She looked down to the floor. “I don’t know how to tell you this, so I think I will come right out and say it…”
“What is it, Bridget?” Allan said.
“We…have a child together,” Bridget said quickly.
Allan quickly shot out of his chair. “What? What do you mean? A child? How can this be? We never…”
Bridget shook her head. “We did, Allan.”
“No,” Allan said. “This can’t be.”
“You may not remember this, but when you were recovering…we had physical relations,” she said quietly and stood. “Those relations resulted in a child.”
Allan was reeling. The room was literally spinning, and he felt as if he couldn’t breathe. He brought his hand up to his head and tried to get a grasp on what Bridget was saying. A child?
He looked at her, and then said, “Bridget, I don’t remember, it’s true.”
She nodded. “I didn’t think you did,” she said. “When you didn’t say anything about our former relationship when we saw each other last, I knew I had to tell you.”
Allan couldn’t speak for a moment and they stood in silence. ‘I don’t remember, Bridget, like I said. But I will admit that I have had feelings that something may have happened between us, but I could never confirm it. That time in my life was so confusing, and I can’t remember much of it. Perhaps I hurt my head more than I thought. But, if you say it’s true, it must be true.”
Bridget nodded. “It is true, Allan. Your daughter has your green eyes and my dark blonde hair. She is beautiful.”
“My…daughter.” Allan uttered.
He looked up at Bridget and said, “I would like to meet the child.”
Bridget nodded. “You shall. I could bring her here, or you can come to our home.”
“I need some time to think,” Allan said. “I will be in touch with you. I’ll have Clark see you out.”
Bridget looked a little surprised that Allan had dismissed her so quickly, but he felt as if his entire world was crashing down around him. He walked through the sitting room, and when he passed Clark, he simply said, “Please show them out.”
Allan was in a fog, and he just kept walking. He didn’t even know where he was walking to, he just walked through the hallway. A child?
He didn’t know how long he walked. It could have been a minute, or an hour, but he found himself back in his office. He stared at his desk and the empty piece of paper that sat in the middle of it. He knew that he had to let his family know, before they heard it elsewhere, so he had to write a letter to Edward. He would trust that Edward would let Mary know, and that Esther would find out.
Allan began writing and knew that his world was falling apart and that his dreams of being with Esther would never come to fruition.
Chapter 21
“It just doesn’t make sense,” Esther said with tears rolling down her cheeks. “I don’t understand.”
She was sitting at Mary’s house in the drawing room. Ruth was sitting to her left with her arm around Esther’s shoulders, and Mary was sitting on the sofa opposite them. Mary had just broken the news that Allan was a father and had a bastard child.
Esther could see that Mary and Ruth were looking at each other. “We don’t understand, either,” Mary said. “Edward has gone to be with Allan, and once he speak
s to him, we will know more about the situation. We thought that it was important for you to know, though, which is why I summoned you here.”
Esther nodded. She knew she could count on her sisters for support, but she was truly devastated by this news. She could never be with a man with a bastard child, and she very much doubted that even if she wanted to be with Allan still, that her father would allow it. Not only did she feel sad, she was also angry. Just when she believed that she had found love, this happened.
“Edward said this doesn’t make sense,” Mary continued. “But he will soon be with Allan, and I’m sure we will get word, shortly.”
Esther nodded again. She just couldn’t speak. She knew that she would have to forget about Allan.
* * *
“Allan, you have to explain to me what happened,” Edward said. The cousins were sitting in Allan’s drawing room, right in the same place where Bridget broke the news about his child.
“I just don’t remember it, Edward,” Allan said. “Bridget claims that I am the father of her child, but how could that be?” Now that Allan has allowed the news to settle in and the shock to wear off a bit, he was definitely questioning Bridget’s story.
“I agree,” Edward said. “There is just too much that doesn’t make sense about this story. That’s why I’m here, though…to help you figure it out. So, please, tell me what happened.”
Allan nodded and took a sip of wine, and then began talking. “I was in my office and Clark came in to tell me that Bridget Crampton was here. Now, I have not spoken to her nor contacted her since the day of our walk. That was the day I decided that she was not the right person for me. Instead, I realized that I wanted to pursue Esther.”
“Right,” Edward said with a nod. “Which, I believe we can agree, it was certainly the best decision.”
“Correct,” Allan said. “So, you can imagine my surprise when Bridget just appeared.”
“Of course,” Edward said. “Then what happened?”
“She basically just came right out and said it…” Allan replied.
“Said what? Tell me exactly,” Edward responded.
“She said that we have a child together. She said that it happened when I was convalescing,” Allan said. “But of course I don’t remember.”
“You don’t remember anything?” Edward asked.
“No,” Allan said. “I don’t remember anything. There is a part of me that does have some type of thought that something happened, but I believe that it was just a dream or a fantasy. I don’t think it actually happened.”
“I see,” said Edward. “But you are not certain.”
Allan shook his head. “I am not certain, no.”
“Allan,” Edward said. “I think we have to get to the bottom of this. Can you set up a meeting between you and Bridget? I will go with you to meet her. I would like to talk with her, as this not only affects you, but it also affects our entire family.”
“I will set it up,” Allan said. “Perhaps I will ask her to come here again. You can be here, too. Then, we can find out more.”
* * *
Esther was doing everything she could to forget about what was happening with Allan, so she was focusing on her work. She still was very worried about the whereabouts of Julia, but she did get a bit of information about the situation.
A letter had arrived for her when she was at the ball, signed by an anonymous person, explaining that Esther could find out more about the fates of Julia and Sophia by speaking to a woman named Tabitha at an asylum for girls. Esther didn’t know who the letter had come from, but she was going to follow the lead that it gave her.
“Are you almost ready to leave, My Lady?” Rose asked. She was accompanying Esther to the asylum.
“Yes, Rose,” Esther replied. “I am ready as soon as the carriage pulls up.”
Esther didn’t know how long it would take to get to the asylum, but she knew that it was further than the other orphanage she had been to. So, she wanted to leave early in the day.
The only thing Esther knew from the anonymous letter was the name of the woman, Tabitha, and the name of the asylum. Everything else was quite mysterious, but she was certainly hoping that she would get the answers she was seeking.
“The carriage is coming, My Lady,” Rose said. “I can see it from the window.”
“Thank you, Rose,” Esther replied.
Esther held her reticule close to her body and watched as the carriage pulled up in front of the door. A footman had opened the door and she had a clear view of the carriage.
“Good morning, My Lady,” he said as he held the door open.
“Good morning,” she said as she took his hand. He helped her step up into the carriage, and then he shut the door behind her. She scooted back into the seat, and then saw Rose take her place in the front of the carriage. The coachman followed suit, and before she knew it, they were in motion.
Esther sighed and looked out the window. The sun was rising in the sky, and she could tell that the day would be warm. The shining rays reminded her of the day she and Allan met in the rose garden at Edward and Mary’s estate, and it made her sad.
She was quite convinced that she had very strong feelings for Allan, and perhaps even felt love for him, but she couldn’t bear to be with a man who had a bastard child. However, because of her feelings for him, it was also difficult for her to walk away from him.
Esther hadn’t heard anything from him since, but it would not be appropriate for him to send her a letter since they were not engaged. The only way she would even learn anything about what was happening with him was through Mary, and Esther didn’t know if Edward had returned from his visit with Allan.
She could only wait until Mary sent her a letter, and since she hadn’t received one yet, she would have to keep wondering…or did she? Perhaps it was best if she simply forgot about Allan. These thoughts were constantly at war in Esther’s head.
As she watched the world pass by through the window, she knew she would have to do her best to stop thinking about Allan. So, Esther pushed her mind to Julia and Sophia.
Esther couldn’t imagine that they were in a happy place. She thought that Sophia, at least, would reach out to her. It’s not like Esther had tried to hide the fact that she was looking for the woman. So, she believed that at some point, Sophia would have tried to contact her. Since she hadn’t, Esther was worried.
She also was worried about Julia. Though she tried not to consider what she might be going through, she couldn’t help but think that the young girl was in a terrible situation.
The time passed slowly, and Esther could feel that at least an hour had passed, possibly more. She wished they would just get to the asylum, and as they continued on, Esther noticed that the buildings were becoming closer together and the condition of the structures were getting worse. She was far from the comforts of home.
The sun seemed to fade as the carriage pulled into a dark, dank courtyard, and as Esther looked out of the window, she could see an imposing building covered in ivy. It did not look inviting. Instead, it looked a bit frightening, and she believed that this asylum was even in worse condition than the orphanage where she had met Mr. Smith.
The carriage stopped, and then the door opened. She took the coachman’s hand and stepped out, and immediately was hit with a terrible odor. Rubbish littered the courtyard, and a bird lay dead only inches from Esther’s feet. This is not a good omen.
“My Lady…are you sure you wish to go in?” Rose asked, as she stepped down from the carriage. “I’m sure we could turn around and go back home.”
For a brief moment Esther considered turning around, and continued to observe the damp, dirty environment, but she didn’t want to leave in case Julia or Sophia were here.
“No,” she said. “I need to investigate this, no matter what.”
Rose nodded and stepped over a puddle that was filled with black, reeking water. Esther began to move towards the door, being careful not to step on any of
the rotting refuse as she walked.
The closer they got to the door, the worse the smell was. Esther pulled out a handkerchief from her reticle and held it to her nose. The putrid odor was still present, but it was less pronounced.
She and Rose had to cross over another puddle filled with black water to get to the door, and it was causing Esther to feel nauseous.
Esther knocked on the door and waited for an answer. None came. She then knocked again and was met with silence. She turned to Rose and said, “Odd that no one is here to open the door.”
Lusting For The Broken Earl (Steamy Historical Regency) Page 19