by K. C. Cross
There is only one way for this to end as far as I’m concerned.
Total glow.
That’s what I want.
Total glow.
“Do it,” I say. “Do it, Nyleena. Or I swear to fucking God I will make sure Crux never gives you a ship. I will make sure you’re trapped here with me forever. I will take all your choices away and lock you up in my quarters. Bind you to a magnetic sex wall and then…”
“Then what?” she growls.
“Then… I’ll never touch you or talk to you again!”
I’m not sure what happens next.
She goes soft and hard in the same moment. Light pours out of her eyes, and her mouth, and between her legs. But then, in that single instance, she goes dark too.
My whole mind goes dark. Everything.
The world is blank with blackness.
There is no glow, there is no light, and there is no white, or silver, or color of any kind.
It’s just… space. And time.
So much time passes. A lifetime. A generation. A millennium. An eternity passes by as she comes.
And then my cocks contract and it takes… forever. Like the whining charge of a plasma rifle just before it fires. Like the kickback of a SEAR cannon just before it annihilates a war ship.
Only there is no release.
Just space. And time.
I realize I no longer exist. I am nothing but tiny atoms floating in the time and the space. I have been disembodied. I am loose, and sparse, and infinite all at once.
And then the rifle fires. The cannon annihilates.
My cocks come inside her and…
The world is back, the light is there—streaming out from here. The floors are shaking, and the walls might crumble, and her fingernails leave scars on the round muscles of my shoulders.
And I think to myself… That’s more like it.
That is her and this is me.
And now we are… a we.
When we wake we’re hugging each other in a heap in front of her door.
I think years have passed. Maybe even decades.
For sure, we’ve been here in this spot for several eternities already.
But when I finally manage to make my fingers work again and open up a screen I see the impossible.
Because no time has passed at all. In fact, we’ve gone backwards.
The time right now is the time it was when I came up to meet her outside the Pleasure Prison.
“We went backwards,” I mumble.
“Yeah,” she says. “Sorry about that. I kinda do that when I let loose too much during sex.”
“You do… what, exactly?”
“Rewind time.” She flips her hand in the air. “You know.”
“I… no. I don’t know. What the hell just happened?”
“Sun-fucks, Luck. I just told you twice. I rewind time.”
“That’s not possible,” I say.
“OK. If you say so.”
“You really rewind time?”
She huffs out a sigh. “Will saying it four times make it sink in? Just for once can you take my word on something? Believe me?”
Believe her? She’s like the liar champion of Harem Station these days. Hell no, I’m not gonna believe her.
“But hey, you know what?” she says.
“What?”
“Guess that fight never happened.”
“Huh,” I manage to grunt. “But…” I think about this for a moment. “But then… none of this ever happened.”
“Nope,” she says. Then she sighs. “This is why we silvers can’t get pregnant. That’s why our race is doomed. And no matter what Veila does, she will never have a baby. Not a silver one, anyway.”
I know it’s not funny, but I bark out a loud guffaw. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”
“Do you think I’m kidding?”
“No,” I say. “But… how did we get here then? How are we here when we’re supposed to be… there? I should be walking into the Pleasure Prison and you should be with Tray and Valor.”
“I dunno. I never said I understood it. I just know how to make it happen.”
“But Veila,” I say, already moving on to the next confusion thing. “Delphi is Crux’s daughter. So…”
“Delphi’s pink,” Nyleena says. “Pink and silver aren’t the same.”
“But Corla had babies—”
“You can make a pink from a silver, Luck. But you can’t even engineer a silver baby without some serious intervention, let alone produce a natural one. Corla is the only one who figured out how to even bring a pregnancy to term. So I guess it can be done. But she’s never told anyone how she did it. She was missing that year she gave birth. That’s probably why Veila wants her so bad. Veila needs that final secret to make her stupid breeding plan work. Veila needs… well, everyone doing breeding stuff—they all need to make silvers.”
“So… why do they blow you up? That makes no sense.”
“Because we can do that pretty well. What we don’t do well is make babies the natural way. We are all engineered, remember? It’s not the same. I don’t know what’s different, so don’t ask. But I do know they are all looking for a natural-born silver princess.”
“Is that why Corla is so special? She’s a natural silver princess?”
“She cannot be,” Nyleena says. “It can’t be.” But then she whispers, “Can it?”
“So they need us too,” I continue. "They think that these violet eyes we have signify some particular genetic component that will make silver babies?”
“No one’s having a baby,” Nyleena says. “Lyra won’t make a silver princess. And neither will Veila—she’s not even a real silver.” Then she pauses. “But maybe Delphi—”
“Hold on,” I say, still trying to wrap my head around the first part. “How is Veila silver? Because now that you said that I do remember Crux telling me once that Veila was pink. What’s up with that?”
Nyleena chuckles. “I’m pretty sure that’s what all that leveling-up shit is about.”
“Well, fuck,” I say. “This is what Crux wants to know? Why didn’t you just tell him?”
“He already knows that, Luck. That’s not what he was asking about.”
“Then what was he asking about?” I’m so confused.
“He was asking about Draden. And that… I have no clue. I don’t know what changes you violet-eyed Akeelians are capable of.”
My brain feels like it’s gonna explode.
“I need to ask Asshole ALCOR for that info.”
“But… what was that light? And dark? It was dark, right?”
“Before the light? Yeah.” She sighs. “It’s dark all right.”
“So this happens every time?”
“No. Never, in fact. I’ve never let loose with anyone before. Just you.”
“Then how did you know about the time thing?”
“I just do, OK?” Then she squirms out of my embrace and climbs into my lap. She places one hand flat against each of my cheeks and peers down into my eyes. They’re still glowing a little. Lit up with that same electric current, but subdued now. “This is why I hold back, Luck. It’s not you, it’s me. There’s something inherently wrong with fucking up time. Don’t you see that?”
I manage a smile. And a nod. Because I do, ironically, totally understand that.
But deep down I’m sad. Will she never let me see this again? Is this the one and only time I ever get to feel that true soulmate connection with her?
Are we doomed to a life less lived? In all ways, no matter what we do? Will we have to go backwards each time we want to be close and connected?
“Where are Tray and Valor then? Because if we took back time then everyone around us lost time. Right?”
She shrugs. Then sighs. Heavily. “I dunno. Maybe we should ask them what happened?”
I hug her tight and sigh. “Not tonight. I’m sure if something really bad happened we’d know about it by now.”
&nb
sp; I manage to stand up, holding her close to me as she wraps her legs around my middle. My cocks have no interest in her right now. Which is a first. And it feels good to have that need taken away. To just… be with her without the instinctual urges.
We walk to the bedroom and I put her down on the bed. I take off her boots, and she lets me. But when I try to take off her bodysuit she shakes her head and pulls away.
“What? Are you telling me no?” I sorta laugh.
She nods. “I’m telling you no. I’m not getting naked with you.”
“But why?”
“I’m just not. I’ll sleep with you. If you want me to. But I’m not taking off my clothes.”
I don’t know what to say to that. It’s weird, right?
But is it any weirder than everything else going on around me? Any weirder than time flowing backwards when she comes?
And I’m just about to ask like a million more questions about that when she says, “Take it or leave it. I’m not negotiating or explaining.”
I sigh. Give in, because I’m tired, and confused, and there are just no answers for me tonight. So I say, “I’ll take it.” And then I undress, climb into bed next to her, and wrap my arms around her middle.
She lets me spoon her. Exhausted from the light—or maybe the dark, I’m not sure. And begins to relax.
“Thank you,” I say. But I get no response. And when I reposition so I can peek over her shoulder and see her face, she’s already asleep.
I want to say more though. I want to say… “I like you, Nyleena. I might even love you.”
And I do say it. Because I think it needs to be said even if she doesn’t hear me.
And then I think about how we all want to tame her. How we all think she’s so wild.
But she’s not, is she?
How ironic that Princess Nyleena is actually the picture-perfect example of self-control. All this time she’s been holding back the power inside her.
How exhausting must that be?
Probably why she’s always so restless. Hell, if I couldn’t get my sexual release I’d be wild and savage too.
So point to Nyleena.
Still, she’s dangerous and unpredictable. And I’m pretty sure if Veila could get her hands on Nyleena and me—or Corla and Crux, for that matter—she would do unspeakable things to us.
Maybe Serpint and Lyra are safe? Maybe Jimmy and Delphi…
Oh, shit. I cut her off earlier. She said something about Delphi. Something like… Veila will never have a baby. Or Lyra. And then she said, “But maybe Delphi—”
Another mystery. Who the fuck is Delphi? I get that she’s Crux and Corla’s daughter. And she has a twin called Tycho, who we will be hunting for soon, once we get a handle on the situation and figure out where Veila is. But who are these two? What do Delphi and Tycho have to do with anything?
I don’t know. And no one else here knows either, so there’s no one to ask.
The only thing I do know is that Nyleena can’t leave this station.
She can’t leave. She just can’t. It’s too dangerous.
And when she figures that out for real, she’s gonna be pissed off. Probably wilder than ever.
But… maybe there’s another way to rein her in?
Maybe I’m going about this all wrong?
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN - NYLEENA
There is another world out there. That’s the feeling I get as I sleep and dream. It’s a world filled with glow. Not coming from me, just a general all-encompassing glow that fills the space around everything.
And in that glow there is… life.
Not organic, not inorganic. Both. Because life isn’t about bodies, it’s about minds.
And the only thing I know, as I hover there between these two worlds, is that I am part of it.
It’s a place where all the elements of the universes swim together like a big pool of potential. And all I have to do is pluck out what I need and bring it back with me.
Or maybe… maybe that’s not quite right? Maybe it’s not about ripping it all apart but bringing it together?
My waking is sudden and complete.
One moment I’m there and the next I’m not.
My eyes are open and I’m staring at the ceiling. Fully aware. Luck next to me in my bed.
“Hmm,” I hum. Then draw in a deep breath and let it out. I turn my head to see him, then smile.
He is very beautiful when he’s asleep. I turn over so I can just stare at him like this. All quiet and calm. His breathing slow and even. He’s flat on his stomach and I don’t know why I love that so much, I just do. His cheek is pressed into the pillow, his forearms hidden somewhere underneath. His brown-blond hair just a little too long as it falls over his face.
Luck.
It’s a cool name.
Everyone wants luck.
I told him too much last night. He’s going to tell Crux and the rest of them. But it doesn’t matter. Whatever Veila is doing, wherever she is, it’s not going to work. I want to hunt her down and kill her, not because I want to save anyone. I just want to punish her for disrupting the other world that hovers on the other side of this one. The swimming pool of golden-hued potential I know exists but can’t seem to find.
I’m gonna find that place. I need to find that place.
Maybe that’s the restlessness inside me? It’s calling me, isn’t it? This in-between world where there is nothing but gold.
That’s my mission, I think.
Which means I really need that ship more than ever.
I need to find this place before other people do. Before Veila does.
She doesn’t dream about that world the way I do. You either are a silver or you’re not. And she is not. I have a theory of what leveling up is now. It’s some artificial way to access that pool, I think. And I consider telling Crux this. I consider getting up, getting dressed, and going up to the harem to pound on his door to let him know I know.
I could get that ship right now. Leave tonight.
But I’m not sure. And I have no proof. And… I just get this feeling that there’s more to it than that. Like I’m one little piece of the puzzle.
And I don’t want to jump the gun. I don’t want to let anyone know I dream about this place until I understand it.
I wonder if Corla is dreaming about it right now?
A tingle of jealousy surges through me at that thought. I don’t think I would mind being locked up in a cryopod if it meant I could stay in that in-between world longer. Not just a sliver of time while I dream.
I long for it. I want it. Maybe… I have always wanted it?
The ship is still a good idea. I do need to leave here if I want to find more answers. But I’m starting to get the feeling that there’s still pieces to find here.
Something has changed since I started this little quest. New things have come to light. New things that all seem to be connected.
Earth. The Pleasure Prison. All that mumbo-jumbo about quantum packages of information.
I’m on a path now. That’s what this feels like. And there’s clues missing. Clues I need to find so I can piece together this puzzle and understand what’s at stake.
Because I don’t really get it.
Veila is making an army. That’s what the Cygnians and Akeelians are doing too. But why? I mean what will they really do with that army? Take over the galaxy?
What’s the point? There’s hundreds of billions of galaxies. Even if they got control of one, who cares? Space is so big, so open, so empty. It’s just not possible to be in charge of all of it.
And the dumbest thing is that there’s plenty of room for everyone. There’s enough space out there to have a trillion nightmare societies like the Cygnians and Akeelians.
So what is their endgame?
This is the part that puzzles me and this is the question I now need to answer.
I throw the covers off and get out of bed. Then glance over my shoulder to see if I woke Luck.
Nope
. He must be very tired because he doesn’t even stir.
I change my clothes—not a bodysuit this time, just some tactical pants and a t-shirt—and then grab my deck boots and take them out to the living room to put them on, ticking off the things I know to be true when it comes to this little mystery.
One. Crux is worried about leveling up. Probably because Veila told Jimmy that their brother Draden is still alive due to this process.
Two. Asshole ALCOR is having some kind of existential crisis. That’s why he’s locked up inside the Pleasure Prison with the Succubus AI from Mighty Minions.
Three. Jimmy and Delphi are fixated on this place called Earth.
Four. Luck thinks Valor and Tray are doing some kind of reality experiment inside the Pleasure Prison.
Five. Valor is fixated on Veila. Which doesn’t surprise or worry me as much as it does Luck because come on. We all know Veila is the bad guy here. She’s our target. We’re all kinda fixated on her.
Six.
I don’t have a six yet. I just know there is one. Probably a seven, and an eight, and a nine too.
And ten. There has to be a ten. Ten makes a very nice list. So I’m pretty sure there’s a ten.
Once my boots are on I stand up, ready to go looking for number six. I think that starts with Baby ALCOR, so I open up my air screen and press the big red HELP button.
“What can I do for you, Nyleena?” the Baby says.
“Can you tell me about—”
“I’m sorry,” he says, cutting me off. “Is this an emergency?”
“Um… no. I guess not.”
“Then please make an appointment. I do realize that Real ALCOR was available every moment of every spin, but the HELP button and calendar were put on the air screen for a reason. I need to prioritize.”
“Right, but—”
“Please choose a date and time to book your appointment,” an automated female voice says.
I stare at the screen. “Did the Baby just hang up on me?”
“Please choose a date and time to book your appointment,” she repeats.
“You fucker,” I say, closing the screen. “What an asshole.”
“Yeah, he’s a real piece of work.”
I turn to find Luck walking down the hallway. He’s naked, hard, and sleepy.