by Rona Jameson
It’s the smile that stops me. It isn’t quite a happy pleasant smile, more like a sinister, I know something you don’t smile. My heart thumps against my breastbone as he walks toward me and indicates for me to slowly turn. “What do you think?”
“It’s different than I expected when they were given to us today. The material is thin, and I hope will help to keep me cool in the heat outside. I think we’ll all look nice in a uniform.” I want to escape so I can meet Rafael on the roof. There is only one way that will happen quickly, and that is if I show support for what he’s given me and the other students.
“I thought so too.” He rubs his chin. “And the other thing you were given today. Do you have thoughts on that?”
I swallow and think it best to keep my mouth fully closed on my opinions about the journal. “No, sir. The journal is different.” I shrug. “You know I like journals.” I like the flowery journals I can write about the butterflies in. I’ve never kept a personal one before.
“Something tells me you’re not happy.” He stays relaxed and perches his hip on the cabinet next to me so that he can watch me closely. “I want the truth, Wren, please. How do you feel about the changes that took place today?” He sighs. “If you are honest with me, I promise not to punish you for speaking your mind. Tonight, can be a night off if you like. But I really want to know your thoughts.”
It’s strange of him to talk to me in this way. He’s never offered a “night off,” as he put it. Knowing Rafael is close helps with my confidence for the first time in a long time.
“I don’t like the idea of others reading a journal I’ve written my thoughts in, or that I’d want them to know what I’ve done to please you or done to warrant a punishment. I think it should be kept private between parent and child.” His smile tightens and anger flashes in his eyes. He isn’t happy and I doubt it’s really a night off. But I keep going, almost as though I’m unable to stop. “I do like the uniform, even though at first I thought it was a strange thing to do. I think having all the girls wearing these, and the boys match us in their blue pants and red shirts will be nice to see around the school. I don’t understand why the computers have been removed, though.”
Wren, shut up!
I snap my mouth closed, knowing I’ve gone too far with my thoughts as the Reverend stares at me with a thoughtful look on his face. “You look pretty in the dress.” He moves from the kitchen, and shouts behind him, “I have work to do. I’ll see you in the morning.” The door to his office closes.
Confusion wells inside of me.
I don’t know what to make of the Reverend. He never gives me a compliment without an ulterior motive. And I’m certainly not used to him asking my opinion on anything. Nothing will change because of my comments. He doesn’t work like that. The only advice he takes is his own.
Standing in the kitchen like a home accessory won’t get me anywhere, so I turn and flee upstairs to my room, hoping Rafael really does wait on the roof for me.
I QUICKLY REMOVE the dress and slip into a pair of sleep shorts before climbing onto the roof to find Rafael waiting. Watching my step so I don’t fly off the roof like a butterfly and land with a cry, I take Rafael’s offered hand and settle beside him. I don’t miss the quick once-over he gives me before he lies back and stares up at the sky.
“It’s cloudy tonight,” I comment, disappointed the stars aren’t out for us. I turn and stare at Rafael instead. He’s more gorgeous than the night sky—at least, I think so. His face is cast in shadow and the deep scar on his cheek stands out like a pulsing vein. His lips are firm and sensual, and it does things to my body when my eyes are drawn to them. The set of his chin suggests a stubborn streak, which I know he has. He wears his black and silky straight hair shaggy, and I like it best when it sticks up because it gives him a lazy look.
Pleasure suddenly softens his face and he holds my gaze. “You like what you see, huh?” His lips twitch. “Because I do.” His body follows his gaze as he turns onto his side to face me. His hand lifts and brushes a tendril of hair from my face.
He leaves me breathless and I feel heat rising in my body. It feels strange and new, but good. “I do.” My voice is barely a whisper. He hears me. His eyes drift toward my lips and narrow, until he suddenly pulls away and lies back down.
“That’s good,” he mutters, and coughs. “So, did the Reverend say anything about what happened at school today?”
Because I need time to think about my reaction to him and what I should do about it, I let him change the subject. “He asked my opinion and told me I wouldn’t be punished for speaking my mind.” I shrug and stare up at the small clearing of clouds, enjoying the hint of stars. “He told me I looked nice in the dress.”
I feel Rafael’s stare and refuse to acknowledge it. My body still feels warm and different. It’s a nice feeling and I’m happy to note I’ve only ever felt like this with Rafael. Does it mean I want him to kiss me? Do I want to do other things too? Perhaps I do. He settles down again and his hand reaches for mine. I hesitate and then intertwine my fingers with his. It feels really good to hold his hand. I feel safe and warm when we are like this.
“How do you feel in the dress?”
“The dress is thin and will keep me cool.”
“I sense a but…”
“It’s too revealing. I’ll have to wear dark, um, things underneath.”
He frowns and after a quick glance over me, averts his gaze. “That bad, huh?”
“It is. It shows everything…and I mean everything. Leaves nothing to the imagination.” Embarrassed, I admit, “I don’t have any bras that fit, so I need to make sure I wear a dark stretchy tank top underneath.” My cheeks burn in the darkness.
Rafael groans. “I wish I didn’t know that.” He chuckles. “I look like a dork in the pants and shirt,” he offers.
“I can’t imagine you in any other color but black.”
“I’ve worn black for a long time.” He shrugs. “Since I turned fifteen. The girls thought I was hot.” The corners of his mouth turn up in a smirk.
I roll my eyes. “It’s all in your head.” I tease.
He pokes me in the side. “You think I’m hot.” He pokes me again.
Giggling, I grab his hand. “I’m not admitting anything because I think you have a big enough head as it is.”
His eyes gleam with laughter and…something more. I feel myself go completely still as he comes closer and leans over me. He stares down at me before placing a kiss to the tip of my nose. “You have had my attention since I saw you in the garden covered with butterflies. I should have realized then you’d be a pain in my ass.”
“What?” I gasp. “You pay me a compliment and then you take it away in your next breath.”
“I’m joking.” He tugs me against his side, and I rest my head on his shoulder. “I’m worried, Wren.” He becomes serious. “My dad said the Reverend is the instigator of whatever goes on around here.” He gives me a squeeze and sits up. I follow. “And that means you’re in the middle because he’s your dad.”
“He’s changed, or maybe, he’s always been the way he is, and I’ve just grown up enough now to notice.” I slip my fingers into his hand and he holds tightly, caressing my thumb with his. “I don’t think he’d hurt me intentionally.” I stop as the lie leaves my lips. He has hurt me. Intentionally and unintentionally. But he’s my dad for all his flaws. Don’t I owe him some loyalty, even a small lie because of how he used to be? I sigh. “But then, I never thought he’d be as controlling as he’s become.” That, at least, is the truth.
Rafael gives me a sidelong glance and refuses to look elsewhere until I finally turn and meet his eyes. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I’m debating whether to ask you something.” He turns away and whispers, “Do you know anything about religious cults?”
I blink a few times in surprise and shake my head. “I read something online in the library at school once. It was about a compound somewhere in Te
xas that had been raided or something. A long time ago I think.” Then it hits me why he’s asking. “You think that is going on here?”
“Not as bad as what you’re thinking, but it seems like everyone in town follows the Reverend’s words. Dad said everyone is very much into what gets preached at the church.” Rafael puts his face so close to mine I feel his breath against my mouth. He swallows hard, and whispers, “If you think about it. Everyone in Port Michael attends the church on Sundays. My dad and I are the outsiders, and the only family in Port Michael who doesn’t attend. I know my dad worries.”
My heart pounds as I caress his face with my gaze. I want to touch his face but can’t close that distance between us. I search his face for the truth behind his words. I find it and wish I hadn’t. I have to pray that because of who I am I will be okay in the midst of all the coming chaos. Will Marcel and Rafael be, though? They have to be.
“You have to tell your dad to leave.”
Rafael shakes his head. “I can’t leave you. Not now. And what about Peter Wild? I don’t like him or the way he looks at you.”
“That man gives me the cold shivers. I can’t deny that. The Reverend hasn’t mentioned him since he was here.” I pause, not wanting to think about what the Reverend and that man have planned for me. Instead, I beg, “Rafael, you have to leave before you can’t, because if what you think is true, and I believe it is, then there is going to be trouble.”
His large hand cups the back of my head and draws me close. His dark eyes search mine, and I hold his gaze and watch him dip and softly brush a kiss across my lips. He pulls away licking his lips. “Sleep well,” he whispers, and before I can get my mouth to work, he’s moving to the side of the roof.
He climbs down the side of the house so quickly it amazes me how he manages it. Now that he’s gone, I’m left with my mind churning with everything he said…and a whole new emotion I’m not even sure what to call it. Horror? Disbelief? It’s there, like a rock tumbling in the waves, rubbing at each thought as I try to piece it all together. Is the Reverend trying to create some sort of cult or group through his religious beliefs and his greed for power and control? I shudder at the thought, but it gives me pause. I believe he would do anything to have everyone do his bidding—I can see that clearly.
19
RAFAEL
WREN IS GOING to be the death of me in more ways than one, I decide as I catch my breath. I have to remember that I’m twenty and she’s only seventeen.
What are you doing, Rafael?
I push away from the side of the house, but the low rumble of a van keeps me hidden in the shadows. When I look, the van doesn’t have headlights on.
Where is it going?
I move down the side of the house and try to follow it with my eyes. The night is silent but for the van and the creak from Wren’s house. The van turns into the church parking lot and light glows from within the building as a door is opened. I can’t make anyone out from this distance, but the Reverend is home. I heard him moving around once or twice while I’d been talking to Wren.
Above me, a creak and slide of a window draws my gaze upward just as the Reverend shoves his head out. My heart beats rapidly as my body stills hoping he won’t catch me spying. A slight breeze picks up and rustles the shrubs and trees, so I use that to my advantage as I move away from the house and his line of sight. At this point I’m not afraid of the Reverend, not when my father is so close. However, I do fear for Wren. I can’t protect her if I’m not with her.
In the distance there are car doors slamming, and the sound of someone shouting, but I can’t make out the actual words. Something is going on and I bet the Reverend knows exactly what. Why is he home instead of joining his men? He knows my father is former DEA and one of the investigators of the Amarillo raid. Is he trying not to be seen as involved in anything around the town?
My thoughts tumble around in my head and they don’t make any sense. Surely, if he wanted to appear the good law-abiding citizen, then why would he initiate all this change, especially while we’re in town? The journals, the uniforms, and the removal of the computers. All on the same day. Only the Reverend knows his reasoning, but I’m angry he’s willing to throw his devoted followers into law enforcement hands. I wonder if they know who my father is.
Peter Wild does.
I glance through the dark and see the Reverend still at his bedroom window. He’ll catch me if I head home. I glance up to Wren’s bedroom and see the light is off, so at least she’s asleep and won’t be aware of anything happening. I can’t stay where I am until the Reverend moves away. Instead, I sneak around the back of the Reverend’s property and into the trees.
The wind rapidly grows stronger as I step further into the darkness, my eyes taking a few moments to adjust. With the noise of the wind blowing through the trees, I’ll be lucky if a branch doesn’t snap off and drop on me. Hopefully one of the old trees won’t choose this moment to go down either. I shudder at the thought as I glance around worriedly. Perhaps I should have taken time to tell Dad where I was going. He’ll be awake waiting for me, and he’ll have either warned me against this fool hardy plan of mine or come with me.
I stumble over tree roots on the uneven track just as a blowing branch catches me in the face. I touch my injured cheek and my fingers come away sticky with blood. My feet keep moving as I tug at the hem of my T-shirt and lift it up to wipe at the scratch. It stings slightly, but that’s nothing compared to the antiseptic stuff Dad will use once I’m home and he gets a look at me. I wince at the thought.
There is a small green area behind the church before you get to the trees and the wooded area. Both Dad and I had explored it the night before we moved in. As far as we knew, no one had seen us. A lot of places for people to hide and stay hidden. We hadn’t found any cameras but that didn’t necessarily mean there weren’t any.
My heart thumps hard as I crouch and watch the comings and goings behind the church. It’s the same van that had taken the school computers today, only now it’s being unloaded. Three men I don’t recognize move back and forth a few times carrying the old hardware. There will be a reason why they’ve decided to store the computers at the church, and I want to know what that is. It won’t be to prevent students from using them, the reasoning will be more than that. The Reverend never does anything without having a plan in place. He also never does the expected either, otherwise, my father would have caught him years ago.
“What are you doing?” The question reaches my ears and I freeze momentarily thinking I’ve been caught watching. It turns out to be Wild addressing a man standing in front of the van. The man is as tall as Wild, around six foot, and broader in the shoulders than Wild. I wouldn’t like to come across them in a dark alley.
“How do you know there isn’t anyone in the forest watching us?” The man looks toward the tree line where I’m hiding.
“Cameras,” replies Wild. “The boss has everything covered. You’re needed inside, Thomas.”
I need to remember his name.
Thomas shakes his head and disappears inside while Wild continues to look out toward my hiding spot. If there are cameras, then Dad and I have already been seen. However, I don’t think there are. At least, not in the trees—around the perimeter, maybe.
Slowly stepping backwards, my nose twitches when I get a whiff of cigarette smoke. Not a subtle scent, but really strong. I still and slowly turn my head, and squint to try and focus through the darkness. Not five feet away from my position sits a man. He’s about forties or fifties, dark hair kept tidy in a short cut. He’s slim and well dressed.
How long has he been standing there?
“You need to leave before Wild comes looking for me,” the man whispers giving me a sidelong stare. “Go now, Rafael.” The man stands and without looking my way, moves out toward the church just as the door opens once more.
Wild stands in the doorway.
“All clear out here,” the man says, crunching the cigarette under
his booted foot on the stone path. He then bends and reaches for the crushed stub. As he slowly rises, he tilts his face toward me and smirks before he follows Wild inside.
Deliberate.
No chance of grabbing it so Dad can send it off for a DNA match.
I keep my wits about me while I head toward the house. My night vision has kicked in and I can step carefully through the undergrowth. The Reverend’s bedroom light is no longer on and their house is in total darkness. Mine is too, except I spot the shape of Dad waiting for me on the back porch. He’s in shadow, but I know he waits. His eyes follow every step I make once I’m clear of the bordering trees. I don’t make a sound and keep watch at the house next door, but all is quiet.
I feel Dad’s temper before I even reach the top step. I cast him a glance and head straight inside. He follows.
“You’re mad because I went to the church?”
“I’m mad because you are playing with fire lying on that man’s roof with his daughter.” Dad fumes. “I want to help Wren too, okay? I won’t leave her with him in the end, but you are going to blow everything up in the air if you continue dallying with that girl. The man will crack if he catches you both.” He moves past me and I know he’d shake me if he thought it would do any good. He places a foot on the stairs before he stops and asks, “Why did it take you so long to come back here?”
He knows exactly where I’ve been. He gives me a knowing look, and then I get the full effect. He’s furious.
“I stayed hidden and watched them take the computers from school inside the back. They went downstairs to the basement. They didn’t see me, but we do need to go back and try and find out whether they’ve stored them or if they’re using them for something. Not now. There are too many men around. No women. Not that I saw anyway. I overheard Wild say there were cameras around the perimeter, so I’m presuming around the church grounds but not in the trees.”
Dad sighs. “I’m not angry with you, Rafael. I’m scared something will happen to you and I won’t be there to help you.”