by E. M. Moore
Curious glances watch me as I set a pace toward the law offices. I nod and smile to some of them and get surprised, clipped responses back. Their eyes are on me like I’m a sideshow exhibition. Not all of them are mean-spirited, though, some are just curious and far too many are sad. They’re probably mated and can’t imagine what life would be like without their mate.
I check my watch. I’m a couple of minutes early, so I wait outside, leaning against the brick building. From this vantage point, I can see all of the major downtown area. A couple streets on either side of Main host businesses before the landscape moves to residential areas. At that point, the property lines expand, giving the families ample room to shift and play in their yards. The extra square footage means Daybreak reaches out further than a normal city, even if the populations are similar.
The bell rings on the door, and I stand at attention. My heart rises into my throat as I peek around the side of the building. It’s not Sean. It’s the principal of my old high school. Slinking back, I let her leave without seeing me and check my watch again. It’s five minutes past six. There’s still no text, so I decide to head into Sean’s office to see what’s going on.
Blowing out a breath, I run my hands through my newly dyed hair and push the door open. I blink, using my wolf’s vision to adjust to the change in light. Despite it being a little later, there’s still a major difference in light levels as I step over the threshold.
In an interior room, I hear Sean’s voice, and I follow it until I hit a barrier of a woman sitting at a desk. She blinks at me. “Mia, is that you?”
I freeze where I am, shocked when I see Daisy, one of my friends from school. “Oh my gosh, hey,” I reply. “I didn’t know you worked here, too.”
She comes out from around the side of the desk, and I stiffen again. “That’s because you’ve been gone for so long,” she chides, as if I have a say in what happens with my life right now.
Seeing her, listening to her casual conversation, makes me bitter. I can’t believe she gets to work with Sean every day and has the gall to tell me it’s because “I’ve been gone.” The reason why I’ve been gone is someone she works with.
“I’m here to see Sean. I thought I heard him.”
“Oh yeah, he’s in the back. He and Mr. Caproli do a rundown after every day. I’m sure he’ll be out shortly.”
I tap my foot. I don’t know why, it’s not as if I’m not used to waiting for him.
“You must be so excited to be back in town,” she says.
“Yeah,” I tell her. “Thrilled.”
“I’ll be excited to see you at the Winter Solstice festivities this year.”
“Me too,” I say dryly.
I was worried this would happen. I’ve been away for so long that it doesn’t feel like I fit in anymore. Everyone else went about their lives while I’ve been stuck at the academy, pining for someone who just has to sign his name on a dotted line for me to get out. Hell, I’d live with him as a nun if it meant I could escape from Greystone. Yet, somehow our society thinks this is the best way. It’s supposed to teach us about being better shifters; better mates.
Everything is about mates.
“It’s such a shame—”
I decide to stop her right there. “Hey, I’m so out of touch. Have you mated with anyone?”
Her face falls. “No, not yet.”
A pang of guilt hits me. Her revelation hasn’t made me feel any better about my own situation. At least one good thing comes out of it: she doesn’t talk to me again. She turns and moves back behind the desk.
Somewhere to my right, a door opens. Sean’s big laugh echoes around the lobby, and my back immediately straightens. Inside, my wolf’s ears perk up. I turn to find him exiting a room with his head facing behind him still. I see his awareness of me before he even confirms I’m here. His jaw tightens, nose pulling back just the slightest bit. I instantly recognize his scent. To me, he smells like fire—something spicy and hot.
He turns slowly, and I pull my shoulders back. “Hi, Sean.”
He inspects me from head-to-toe, stopping at my hair for a while. “Hey, Mia.” He checks his watch. “Is it that time?”
“It is,” I say, wondering if he made me wait for him on purpose or if he really didn’t care enough to make sure he was on time.
Mr. Caproli gives me a sour look before marching into an office. He’s done some work with my parents before, so he knows who I am, but he must not be worried about keeping up the acquaintance anymore.
Inside, I begin to panic. It’s what I always feared. Even if Sean did take me back, do I even belong here anymore? Will I always be the shifter her mate didn’t want?
There are other rejected mates in Daybreak that came back, but none of them were gone as long as I have. Everyone here must think I’m persona non grata.
“Let me grab my stuff,” Sean says.
His deep voice rumbles through me, and the flicker of recognition that we’re a mated pair flames to life. It’s not as all-consuming as it used to be, though. The longing was so strong when it first happened that I thought it would break me. To be honest, a part of me was glad that Sean stopped coming to so many meetings. After each one, I feel like shit. It’s like being next to something you can never have and trying to be okay with it. It’s stronger than a want, though. It’s a need. A clawing, desperate sort of need.
He turns and disappears down the long hallway. Neither Daisy nor Mr. Caproli pay me any attention as I wait for him. In a few minutes, he comes waltzing back out. He’s unbuttoned the first button on his black polo and untucked it from his khaki pants. He appears more casual now, and it sets me a little at ease as he walks forward.
I stand there awkwardly. I’m usually already in the room when he shows up. He just goes right for the couch, plopping down opposite me, avoiding eye contact. Right now, however, we’re eye-to-eye. I’m on his level. I stare at him, practically daring him to do something different.
He stops in front of me, gesturing toward the door. “You ready?”
I nod, turning to leave the office. I glance at Daisy and find her staring. She looks away as soon as I catch her, but I’m sure she’s already texting my would-be friends. None of them kept in touch with me after I got sent away. There were a few who sent condolence texts, like they were somehow grieving with the person who died, but that was it.
I walk out, my sneakers hitting the cement. Behind me, the door rattles closed, and I turn to ask Sean where we’re going, but he’s already marching down the sidewalk and around the side of the building. I follow him, holding tight to his heels. When we move out of view of the street, he whirls on me. “Just what the fuck do you think you’re doing coming into my work, Mia?”
Recognition spears me in the face. There he is. There’s my supposed mate.
11
“There you are. For a minute, I thought my mate had been body snatched by a nice guy.”
His jaw ticks as he takes in my words. He drives his fingers through his hair and scowls. “Jesus, Mia. I wasn’t expecting you.”
“You weren’t expecting me at the time you said we could meet? Weird.”
He huffs. “I’m not trying to fight with you. I just don’t want drama in my workplace. I’m sure Mr. Caproli is pissed.”
My head snaps back. Not that I care what that old geezer thinks, but I’m curious why the hell my being there is synonymous with drama. “Because I walked into his law office? I wasn’t aware I had restrictions on where I could go.”
“Alright, enough,” he barks.
Fury surges inside me, and my fingers curl into my palms. “No, not enough.” Sean may be able to do whatever he wants when we’re at Greystone Academy, but not here. We’re both members of Daybreak Pack, so we’re both equal. “Why would my showing up there impact him at all? We’re mates. They should want us to be together. Maybe you’ve forgotten that.”
The wolf in his eyes shines through. His breathing deepens, and I almost welcome the figh
t that’s threatening. I swear if we shifted right now, I might be able to take him, even though, genetically, I’m predisposed to be smaller than him. Hell hath no fury and all that.
“You just surprised me,” he says, the fire in his eyes dying. “That’s all.”
I have a million and one retorts, but I need to focus on why I’m here. This is supposed to be Operation Getting My Mate, not Fighting with Him on the Side of the Building. Swallowing my pride, I wait a beat before responding. “I wanted to see where you worked. I’ve been gone for so long, Sean. Everything has changed.”
He has the decency to look like my words affected him. He rubs the back of his neck and steps closer. There’s a small tug in my gut—a spark of memory from the first time we locked eyes that night in our wolf forms. Pure elation and adoration. It’s the only way I can describe it.
“I have so much I need to talk to you about,” I confess, anticipation building again. I hemmed and hawed about what to tell him concerning my new Lydia Greystone imposed timeline, but I figure if I can appeal to him in any way, I should use it. He hasn’t filled out the final rejection form yet, so there must be some hope.
Sean motions toward the sidewalk again. “Let’s go to my place.”
I fall in line behind him for a few steps before realizing we’re heading in the opposite direction of where his parents live. “Your place?” I question.
“Yeah, my apartment.”
A solid brick of ice forms in the pit of my stomach. “I didn’t know you had your own place,” I say, letting sadness seep through my tone.
“I must have forgotten to tell you.”
I clamp down on my jaw, determined not to fight with him. If all we do is fight, I’ll never get anywhere. Like Nathan and Ms. Ebon have been shoving down my throat, I’m down to the wire.
The thought of Nathan makes me stumble. Sean’s arm sneaks out and grabs me by the wrist. Heat surges where we connect, and he yanks his hand away like he literally got burned. He starts to walk ahead of me, completely ignoring the passing connection that I know he must have just felt. Stubborn asshole. “It’s down Pine Street,” he tells me.
We turn the next corner and come upon a duplex. He brings a set of keys out of his pocket, opens the door, and we walk into a narrow living room. A set of stairs in front of us go all the way to the second floor. From my position just inside the door, I can see a white countertop through the next archway. It’s a pretty nice place, and it kills me that I’m staying in the equivalent of a dorm room when he has all the freedom he wants.
Sean kicks the door closed behind us and throws his keys on a table just inside the door. “Come on in,” he offers, the tips of his ears rimmed in red.
“It’s a nice place,” I say, holding my tongue as I look around.
“Yeah, I kind of wanted a grown-up place to stay.”
“Must be nice.”
Fuck. Damn. Lost that battle with myself. And in record time, too.
He glares back at me, and I give him an apologetic smile, like I’d only been joking.
“Let me just...” He heads into the kitchen. “You want a beer?” he calls out behind him.
“Jesus, I haven’t had a drink in a while,” I tell him. “Alcohol is forbidden on academy grounds. What else do you have?”
He pops his head around the archway. “Hot chocolate. It might be old, though.”
“I’ll take my chances.”
My stomach tightens. These are more words than we’ve said to one another in a long time. One of us is usually yelling at the other by now.
I walk to the archway and lean against it. Sean is at the countertop, looking through cupboards. He already has a mug in front of him when he finds a box of hot chocolate mix and takes out an envelope.
“Are you excited about Winter Solstice?” I ask. “I guess there’s a pack meeting tonight.”
“Saw that,” he says. “Looking forward to it.”
Well, that answer was about as bland as a piece of bread. I keep trying, though. I’m nothing if not persistent. “I wonder when shifters from other packs will start showing up?”
“Soon, probably,” he answers noncommittally.
I stay quiet as he finishes making the hot chocolate. He hands me the mug, grabs himself a beer from the fridge, and then we head into the living room. As soon as I sit, I take a sip of the deep brown liquid, breathing in the smell of chocolate.
Sean twists the top of his beer and throws the cap down on the table. “So, you said you had a lot to talk to me about?”
Here goes nothing.
I set the mug down and place my hands between my knees. Turning toward him, I take a deep breath. “Lydia Greystone, the head of the academy? She says I only have two weeks left there. Well, twelve days now.”
He twists his head to the side. “Twelve days?”
“Yeah. She says if I can’t win you back, they’re kicking me out, Sean. And not to come back here. I’ll be going Feral.”
He blinks, sitting forward, and setting his beer on the table. “They told you this? But I haven’t filled anything out.”
“I know. I guess they’re sick of me being there, waiting around with no progress. It’s not like I can stay there forever, Sean.”
He runs his hands through his hair again. My news has affected him at least. He rubs his temples. “I was trying to spare you.”
“Well, it looks like non-action isn’t going to cut it anymore.”
When he peeks at me, I give him a smile to let him know that I’m not really kidding.
He slumps back on the couch like all he’s had to deal with is a bad day at work.
That same angry determination rears its ugly head again. I’m supposed to be winning him back. If I knew how to do that, I’d have already done it, goddammit.
“Sean, do you feel anything for me?” I ask, desperation clawing at me. I move closer to him on the couch. “Anything at all?” I slide my hand over his thigh, and he stares at it.
“Is this why you’re here?” he asks. “Because of your deadline?”
“Answer my question, Sean. My life is in your hands.”
He shoves my hand away from him and gets to his feet, then moves around the arm of the couch. “That’s not fair.”
“The fuck it isn’t.”
“Really nice, Mia. What every shifter wants—a mate with a filthy mouth.”
“So, Gayle doesn’t swear?” I counter.
“Stop bringing her up. It was never about her.”
He’s so full of his own shit, it looks like he believes himself. “Sean, I’m asking you, here, on our own pack land....” I move closer, grabbing his hand and putting it on my chest. “Do you feel my wolf? Do you feel the pull?”
I close my eyes. In my head, my wolf is nuzzling her head against his palm. If he doesn’t take me after this, I will break. I’ll be done for.
“I feel her,” he says, and he’s almost in awe of it, his jaw slack.
My gaze snaps open to find his stare watery and glazed over. “Of course you do,” I tell him, getting to my feet to get closer to him. “Fate paired us together. We’re supposed to be partners. I never did anything to you, Sean. I’ve stayed in Greystone this entire time because you rejected me, and I’m still right here in front of you. I’m still here because we’re mates.”
The silence that follows echoes around my empty thoughts waiting on his reaction to fill me up.
He curls his fingers into my shirt, and my heart skips a beat. My skin flares to life, burning under the sudden tension between us.
I sneak my hand up, resting my own against his chest. I sense double heartbeats—his and his wolf’s—and close my eyes. My wolf reaches out, as does his. There’s a connection between us. Two live wires coming together eagerly. They draw closer and closer. My heart beats his name as if it’s my own personal cheering section.
Sean. Sean. Sean.
“Kiss me,” I say. In my head, we’re already there. We’ve given in, letting fate connect
us in the way we should.
“I. Can’t,” he breathes out.
My eyes snap open. He’s already disassociated himself with me, peering in the complete opposite direction. The moment is lost. We’re just two shifters sitting in a room together with a whole bunch of baggage between us again. “Sean....”
He shakes his head, putting some distance between us.
My wolf howls inside me. At the same time, my heart hardens. I run my hands through my hair and sit back on the couch. “You know what you’re doing to me, then. You might as well fill out the fucking paperwork and be done with it.”
“Mia,” he growls.
“No,” I snap. “Put me out of my damn misery. I don’t want to live in the unknown. Just do it and be done with it.”
“I can’t do that to you.”
“Are you...fucking stupid? You’re doing it to me. You don’t think that the year we spent apart hasn’t been the worst in my life? You kept me there. Away from my pack. Away from my mate. Away from everything I’m supposed to be assured that I have. Do you realize how inhumane Greystone Academy is?”
“It’s the rules,” he says, gaining some of his composure back. I don’t know how he’s able to put up barriers like that, like I don’t matter one iota when I felt his freaking wolf through his chest….
Shaking my head, I sigh. “You’ve been in your own personal hell, haven’t you? Constantly barricading your wolf away. I know he wants me. I felt it. He’s probably thumping in that cage you put him in right now, isn’t he? He feels her,” I say, pointing to my chest. “He feels me. Just give in.”
“No,” he bites out.
Raking my gaze over him as he looms over the arm of the couch again, I continue, “You can’t fight fate. Your wolf has been telling you that, hasn’t he? When he takes control, do you find yourself coming for me? Have you even let him out?”
Fur ripples up and down Sean’s arm. It sprouts on his face as his jaw clenches. His fingers turn to claws, and he moves like a contortionist, bones breaking until his clothes rip at the seams. Pieces scatter everywhere, and amongst them is Sean’s wolf.