by E. M. Moore
Sean glances away. A second later, my phone vibrates where I have it tucked away in the top of my skirt. I pull it out, checking the screen. It’s from Sean. I tilt the screen toward Nathan so he can also get a look. Sorry about earlier.
Nathan runs his hand over his mouth, hiding a scoff.
Another text comes in right after. Should we sit together?
A rumble vibrates through Nathan’s chest, making my entire body buzz down to my pinkie toe. He’s definitely acting like I’m his. A wash of aphrodisia showers over me, like I’m bathing in it. It’s nice to feel wanted. Appreciated. Fucking needed.
“Should I?” I ask Nathan. Not because I need his permission, but because I wonder if it will do any good.
“I said any means necessary.”
I take a deep breath and head that way. When I get there, Sean moves over, leaving me the chair next to the aisle. “Thank you,” he says, knee bouncing up and down. “I really am sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have lost control like that.”
It hits me then that he’s said more heartfelt words to me today than he ever has before. Jesus, this guy is infuriating. “Sometimes it’s good to lose control,” I counter. Immediately, my thoughts go to Nathan and me in the bed.
Mating...relationships. They’re not supposed to be this hard. It feels like I have to pull everything from Sean. With Nathan, it’s like seeing everything around me. I don’t even know how I do it, it just happens. But I’d mourn it if I ever didn’t have it.
I turn to find Nathan leading Gayle toward us, and my heart kicks up a few notches. Sean must notice because he leans closer. “What’s wrong?”
Oh, so now you can feel me? I lose the chance at saying that when he peers over his shoulder. His whole body tenses. I get a front-row seat of the emotions rolling off him. Before he has a chance to really spiral, he places a smile on his face, covering everything up.
Nathan and Gayle cross in front of us. I haven’t seen her in the longest time—only little snippets here and there if I happen to be walking down the hall when she and Nathan have a meeting. He and I try to be around for the other during meeting days because you never know how it will end.
Gayle glances down at Sean as she walks past him, and a low growl emanates from my chest. The people in front of us turn, looking me over. I smile at them, and they quickly look away.
Nathan sits next to Sean, catching my gaze. “Better idea this way, huh? Sounds like you don’t want Gayle sitting next to Sean.”
My cheeks heat. I don’t know if Nathan is only saying this because we’re in front of Sean or if he’s mad that I had a reaction I couldn’t help. I’ve spent months hating this bitch, accusing her of taking Sean from me.
Nathan turns to Sean. “Don’t you think?” From the corner of my eye, I see his own spark with his taunt.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sean deadpans, then turns his back, effectively separating the two of them from us. When he looks at me, it’s all fake. There’s a tension in his body, a coiling, like there’s water built up in a high-pressure hose. He gives me what’s supposed to be a sly grin. “I forgot to tell you earlier that I liked your hair.”
“Yeah?” I ask.
He nods, but he doesn’t even look at it again, which makes me think he’s either blowing smoke up my ass or he’s trying but really just doesn’t know how.
I peer over at Alice. Her mate actually has his hand on her thigh. She’s not going to be at Greystone for long. I envy her. I wish it had been that easy for me. On the other hand, if things were different, I wouldn’t be this close to Nathan, and right now, he’s the only one in my corner trying to keep me sane.
“I should’ve said it earlier, but I think it’s bullshit that they’re putting a timeline on us.”
“I mean, it’s been over a year,” I retort.
“It should take us as long as it takes us,” he counters.
“They don’t see it that way.”
Beyond Sean, I can tell Nathan is listening by the cut of his shoulders, but he doesn’t interfere.
Sean runs his hands through his hair. “Listen, there’s a party coming up. I thought we could go together.” He leans closer. “It’s unsanctioned.”
I know the kind he means. It’s in the woods. Alcohol, dancing, loud music. Most get-togethers are arranged by the alpha, but not these. I used to attend them all the time when we were in high school. I had no idea that older shifters still went to those kinds of things. Maybe they don’t. Maybe they have their own.
“Sounds like fun,” I tell him. “I was also hoping you would go to dinner at my parents’ house. Apparently, the only way they’ll see me is if you’re there, too.”
“That’s not what I said,” a prickly voice comes from behind me.
My shoulders straighten. My mother is standing at my back. I didn’t sense her because I was caught up in Sean and Nathan, but now that she’s behind me, I’m almost overwhelmed by her presence.
I turn immediately. Her sharp cheekbones are highlighted by heavy bronzer. She has a head full of fake blonde curls. Elegant in a silk blouse, she looks the exact opposite of me.
“But Mia’s right, I would love to have you at the house, Sean.”
He clears his throat, his leg jumping up and down even more. “I’d be happy to come, Mrs. Adams.”
Lie. That was so forced.
I smile up at my mother as if to tell her, “See. I can make this happen.”
She gives me a tighter smile back. As usual, my father isn’t with her. He must be on some business, but trust me, she talks more than enough for the two of them.
She reaches down, placing her palm on my cheek like she’s an affectionate mother. “It’s good to see you, Mia.”
With that, she strolls down the aisle. No hug. No embrace. Nothing. It certainly didn’t look like the first meeting between a mother and daughter who haven’t seen each other in months.
I frown after her retreating form. She was never like this before I got rejected. Sure, I knew she was superficial, but she was the doting, involved parent. She wanted to know everything I did. She was interested. It’s like she gave up on the idea of the perfect child when I got rejected, and it got worse every day after that when I didn’t return home with the mate I should have had.
Her disapproval hits me the most. It’s her voice that screams in my head that I’m bucking the system by not being able to secure a mate that should love me, anyway.
“That was...odd,” Sean has the audacity to say.
“Oh, you didn’t know?” I snap. “My mother doesn’t really care for me ever since I’ve been stuck at the academy. She doesn’t call. We don’t talk. She doesn’t invite me home for family time.”
Each of my harsh words hits Sean differently. His forehead pinches, eyes sinking in, like I’m actually punching him.
“I’ll go with you to the dinner,” he assures me before flicking his gaze between my mother, who’s just found a seat in the front row, and me. The panic on his face looks like he hasn’t even taken a second to think about what the rejection has done to me.
I sit back, arms crossed over my chest. I want to tell him to fuck off, that it’s a year and a half overdue, but I can’t really do that, can I?
My phone buzzes, and I peer down. It’s from Nathan. I’m proud of you.
I smile.
Your mom’s a bitch.
I smile even wider.
“What’s so funny?” Sean asks.
I quickly tuck my phone away. I don’t need to explain to my mate why Nathan is texting me uplifting words. It just so happens that my friend is a badass, sexy as fuck, honorable shifter while my mate is a spineless dick.
And that only skims the surface, honestly.
“Nothing,” I tell him. “Just a meme.”
Alpha Richard steps up to the podium, then. We give him a round of applause, and for a brief, sparking second, I feel like I belong again. Here I am, back in Daybreak, sitting amongst my peers. All to
gether like this, the thrum of pack is heavy in the air, settling over my skin in a sweet coat of belonging—something I could easily cuddle up with.
It doesn’t matter that I’m not dressed like them. It doesn’t matter that I was forced to wear this to stand out. The palpable connection between all of us is still there.
It’s just too bad that I’m sitting next to the wrong person to enjoy it to its fullest.
I turn my head, peering around Sean to find Nathan already looking at me. Our gazes meet for the briefest of seconds, and it’s like a piece clicks into place.
This is what’s right. I know it.
14
I wave bye to Alice as she walks hand in hand with her mate away from the cabin. I’m happy for her, but I also kind of want to shift and tear her head off. I’m one thousand percent sure that makes me a bad person. Or maybe just someone who’s fucking fed up with everything.
Tonight is the party Sean invited me to. We’re actually all going. Nathan and Gayle, too. The former nudges me with his elbow, and I peer up to find him giving me a look. The look that says he’d rather be dragging me up the stairs to hold me down on the bed and fuck me.
Or maybe that’s my imagination.
In this cabin, on Daybreak land, Nathan and I have never felt more right. If I can only forget about the whole fate pairing me with someone else part, I’d jump in with two feet and never look back.
Which is exactly why I want to tear Alice’s head off. Why does she get a mate who accepts her? Why is the same person who wants her also the one she is paired with? Sure, it took them a while, but it wasn’t a year plus.
“And then there were four,” Nathan remarks. The rest of us make unintelligible sounds of agreement.
I feel them all next to me. The dread, the hope, the all-around suck. Robbie has been looking pretty sullen lately. But Trish, the other female wolf, sounds like she’s gaining on her guy. Who knows how many of us will be left after this trip?
Last night, Nathan feasted between my legs again. He said he wanted to make sure he left a lasting impression before I go on my date. And boy, did he. Maybe it’s the forbidden aspect that makes it so damn hot, but I honestly don’t think so. Nathan and I just click.
“Three days in,” Trish says.
My stomach starts to knot. If we’ve been here for three days, I’m five days into my fourteen-day deadline. Nine fucking days.
Nathan reaches out and nonchalantly teases his fingers with mine. When she looks around, he pulls his hands back, and I immediately miss them. He must feel the strain, too. The silent ticking sound of the second hand becomes like a bass drum in our heads.
Tonight isn’t just about my date with Sean. It’s about spying on Sean and Gayle, too. People let loose at these kinds of things. If he and Gayle slip, we’re going to take them down.
Sean’s had enough chances to save me. As soon as I told him they were going to make me go Feral, he should’ve called Greystone up and told them he accepted me. If he cared about me even a little, he would’ve saved me. He’s the only one who has that power.
At this point, I kind of want to approach Sean and Gayle and tell them they can be with each other. I don’t give a shit. It works in my favor as long as for all outward appearances, it’s Sean and me, and Gayle and Nathan.
Although, with how Nathan is acting, I’m not sure his wolf would be able to handle seeing Sean and me together, sleeping in our own house.
If I could trust anybody with what’s going on, I would want them to study Nathan and see why he is so protective of me when I’m not even his fated.
When Alice’s mate’s car disappears from view, the four of us disperse. Sean will be picking me up in an hour, so I head toward my room to get ready. Might as well look the part of the mate who’s trying to win hers back, even when I’m planning on backstabbing him.
After everything he’s done to me, I wish I could stop thinking of it like that.
Nathan watches me as I walk up the stairs, and I bite my lip at his intense stare. I enjoy the way he watches me—as if he’s waiting in the wings to pounce whenever he can. It reminds me of when Sean and I were first paired. Even though he sent me away, I’d have scintillating dreams about him. I’ve never flicked the bean so much in my life.
I have to admit, it’s better with a partner who worships you. In his eyes, I can do nothing wrong.
I enter my room, the outfit I picked for the party is on my bed. We all wore our Greystone uniforms, at the behest of the alpha’s office, to see Alice off, but I certainly won’t be wearing that tonight. I peel off my shirt and skirt, then my undergarments, before stepping into the bathroom. I start the shower, waiting for it to heat up. As soon as the mirror starts to fog, I step inside. Earlier, Nathan and I went for a run to release some energy, so a layer of dirt and sweat currently circles the drain.
Whatever happens tonight, I plan on looking hot. For Nathan. I want to drive him wild. I want him to not be able to think straight. He keeps saying how much he wants to fuck me, but it never seems like the right time. Tonight, hopefully we’ll celebrate with some evidence and some dick.
I pile my wet hair on top of my head, letting the shower spray run down my neck and back. Eyes closed, I soak up the warmth of the water caressing every inch of my skin. There’s a slight shift in the air before I feel a press of lips against the spot where my neck meets my shoulder. I freeze as Nathan’s essence engulfs me.
“Are you crazy?” I ask, leaning into him because it’s one thing to tell him how dangerous this is but it’s another to crave it, too.
“Yes,” he breathes. “I heard the shower kick on, and I couldn’t think straight.”
My core pulses with heat and a need so deep it scares me. “Nathan, what’s happening to us?”
He turns me around. I have a split second to notice he’s as naked as I am before he backs me against the wall of the shower. “What’s happening? What’s happening is that the two of us are so right for each other, we transcend fate. And mate law. And everything we thought we knew.” He passes his thumb over my cheekbone. “We’re not together because someone told us to be. We’re together because we built a bond through friendship. And then it went deeper and deeper.”
I melt at his words. Attraction to Nathan was always a given—physically and mentally. I’ve loved him as a friend. We’ve cried together, laughed together, were angry together. We were so in sync that I didn’t notice the other aspect until it snuck up on us when we kissed in my room. But it was like shooting off a firecracker. The sparks fizzled around us until there was pure electricity zinging through the air. It’s the same right now.
“I don’t give a damn about mate laws, Mia. Mark my words. You’re mine, and no one else can have you.”
“I thought you said by any means necessary?”
He tilts my head back and sucks on my neck. “That was before. If he touches you, I’ll kill him. If you go Feral, I’ll kill him.”
“Your points contradict each other.”
He drops a heated kiss over my collarbone before sliding his fingers up the backside of my thigh, hitching my leg up his muscular one. “Not in my world.”
When we shifted earlier, we played like I imagined. We ran, we hunted, we were so in sync. My wolf was happy, and I was happier.
He was right when he called it a bond. A real one. One made from reality and not from the stars.
“In your world, do mates suck on tits?”
His eyes darken, and he slowly licks his lips. Moving his stare down, a low rumble vibrates from his chest.
He steps back, taking me in for the first time. Everywhere he looks, my skin blooms with heat. He watches so long, I get fidgety. “What are you doing?”
“Taking mental notes.”
Now that he mentions it, my own gaze drops to his straining cock. The head bobs in front of him, thick with tension. He hasn’t let me touch him once, even though I’m dying to. He’s worried he won’t be able to stop himself if he claims me s
exually. The last thing we want is for him to go all possessive mate on me in public. For us, that would be a very bad thing. So bad, I don’t even want to think about the consequences.
“This is torture,” he breathes. “I don’t know why I do this to myself.” Stepping forward, he bends low, finally taking my nipple into his mouth. I let out a gasp, then suck it all in, pressing my lips together so no one hears us. He bites down playfully, flicking his tongue over the erect bud in harsh swipes that has me arching into him. Primal need slams into me, and I moan. It comes out guttural with my clenched jaw. With his lips still around my tit, Nathan peers up at me.
“Fuck,” I whisper, mentally snapping a shot. At least I’ll have this memory no matter what happens. Whether I’m in the woods by myself or in a house with Sean.
I reach out, digging my thumbs into his Adonis belt, and pull him toward me, his cock brushing against my belly button. Now that he’s closer, I search for his cock, but he bats my hand away. “I won’t be able to control myself,” he tells me. “You can’t.”
I whine, but he cuts me short when he moves to my other breast, clutching the swell in his hand and devouring it with his hot mouth. My toes curl, and my hips start working, rolling, searching for something I just can’t have right now. “One day, I’m going to ride you,” I tell him, my voice so thick with want that I hardly recognize it. “I’m going to ride you so hard.”
He groans, hooking his arms under my legs and hoisting me in the air, my back skirting over the tile on the way up. I land gracefully, pussy to Nathan’s lips. The best place to be. “Don’t forget about me tonight,” he warns just before he licks out with his tongue.
This is the stuff of movies. This is the hardcore, passionate need I’ve dreamed of. I thought I’d get it when my mate was revealed, but that wasn’t my fate, and I’m okay with that. Nathan is everything.
I rock into his mouth. “How could I forget?”
“When you look at him, you’ll see me. My tongue on your pussy.” He closes his eyes and drags the tip of his tongue up my slit until he reaches my clit. I squirm in his arms, but he easily adjusts to my weight.