by Mandy Magro
Clasping her hands behind her neck, she paced, anger coursing through her every cell. ‘I’d really like you to go.’ Brianna’s face flashed before her mind, and her voice cracked and broke. ‘I’m sorry, but I can’t deal with this right now.’
Eyes cast downwards, he nodded. ‘Okay, Nina, I understand.’ He grabbed his keys from his pocket. ‘But please, I beg of you, don’t shut me out. I know you’re angry, but I want to make it up to you. Somehow. Someway.’
‘For my whole life I’ve lived every day believing you never wanted me. That’s not an easy thing to just get over.’ Her stomach churned and she grit her teeth to stop from sobbing. ‘I need some time to get my head around this, and I can’t do that with you here.’ And then she turned her back to him, clutching the banister so her shaky legs didn’t give way. She knew she was being harsh – she wanted to love him, to accept him, but how was she meant to forgive him for deserting her in a split second?
It was damn near impossible.
‘Okay, bye, Nina.’ His footsteps faded, the front gate squeaked open and then clicked shut. She fought the urge to run after him, to tell him she was glad he was in her life, that she was happy a man like him was her father, but her feet remained glued to the spot. The crunch of tyres and the beam of headlights down the drive hadn’t even disappeared before she grabbed her mobile phone from her pocket and dialled Logan’s number.
Three rings and he picked up. ‘Hey, my beautiful.’
‘I know Bea asked you not to, but after everything we’ve been through, you should have.’ Hoarse, angry – her voice didn’t sound like her own.
There was a deep exhalation of breath. ‘You’ve just read the last letter.’
‘My bloody oath I have, and I’m pissed at you and William, and Bea for that matter.’ Nina couldn’t fight the tears back any longer, and she ended the call before Logan could say any more, making sure to turn her phone off completely so she didn’t have to hear Logan trying to call her back.
With her mind in a spin and unable to think clearly, the sudden need to run, anywhere, just away from here and from anywhere anyone could find her, overcame her, just as it had done all those years ago. So she did what she did best, and quickly packed a bag, grabbed Bea’s swag, got Maxwell comfortable in the dog kennel, and without a second thought, headed out and into the darkness to spend the night beside the creek, in her own company and in her own thoughts.
* * *
Gathering wood and kindling by torchlight had been a challenge, but Nina had risen to it, using it as a way to overlook the whirlwind that was her life right now. Sitting on a stump, she looked to where the campfire crackled, the swirling flames mesmerising her. Try as she might to find a sense of peace so she could straighten out her chaotic thoughts, she couldn’t for the life of her sift through the ceaseless what ifs, how comes and maybes. Like a snow globe that had been shaken, she felt as if she were in a blizzard, with no way to break through the fog. Everything she’d thought to be certain in her world had just been upended and scattered – again – and she wasn’t sure how she was meant to pick up the pieces and put them back together. She knew she’d have to, but it was all so much to take in, in such little time. Her entire life, in a nutshell, had been cracked open way too fast – a month was not nearly enough time, in her opinion, to reveal so many life-altering secrets. She felt as if she were in limbo – caught between feeling completely lost and yet somehow found, as if she finally knew who she was and how her life had come about, but hadn’t a clue how she was meant to move forwards with all of it weighing her down. The anguish swirling deep inside her, the betrayal she felt with Logan choosing to keep the truth from her, and William looking her in the face these past four weeks, knowing all along he was her father, was all too much on top of everything else – losing Bea, coming back here, finding Brianna.
Deep in thought, she jumped when a crunch came from the bushes. She stared apprehensively into the darkness, feeling eyes upon her. Frightening thoughts rushed through her mind, of being raped, left for dead. Fear itched up her spine like clawing fingernails. Her heart hammered against her rib cage. She instinctively held her breath. Listening intently, she scanned the perimeter of her little camp, feeling as if the trees were closing in on her. The quiet little bush enclave she was sourcing solitude and healing from abruptly felt sinister and foreboding. More rustling was followed by the unmistakable sound of heavy breathing.
‘Logan? William? Is that you?’
She was met with stone-cold silence.
Shadows seemed to slide closer to her. Her instincts screamed that she needed to get the hell out of here, now, and fast. Something was very, very wrong. But paralysed with fear, she couldn’t command her legs to run. A twig snapped not four feet from where she was frozen to the spot. She shot to her feet but then it all happened so quickly.
A dark silhouette exploded from the confines of the bushes, taking her with him as he stumbled to the ground. She tried to scream for help, but rough hands smothered her desperate cries. She didn’t see who it was that grabbed her from the shadows, but she knew it was a man – one with the foul stench of stale alcohol and putrid sweat imbedded into his clothes. Pinning her down, he wrapped his hands around her throat, clenching tighter and tighter. She tried to prise his fingers from where they were pressed into her flesh, but he was way too strong. As if she were drowning, she couldn’t breathe, the pressure of his knees upon her chest crushing the air right out of her. She tried to make out his face but tears, dirt and darkness clouded her vision. She gasped and bucked like a wild horse beneath him. Everything suddenly felt dreamlike, like she wasn’t really here and this wasn’t really happening, as if she’d removed herself from it. And then, snapping back to reality, with her instincts telling her she needed to save some of her strength, she succumbed to him and flipped the switch. If fighting wasn’t going to save her, maybe this would.
‘Get it over with and do whatever it is you want to do with me,’ she said, so evenly she shocked herself. ‘I honestly don’t care if I live or die right now.’
Her assailant glared at her, both baffled and disdainful. ‘You’re bloody crazy,’ he hissed.
‘Why are you doing this?’ Her head woozy, Nina fought not to pass out.
With a menacing leer, he shook his head. ‘Because I need to finish the job I started all those years ago.’
‘What job?’
‘Punishment. Retribution.’ He momentarily turned his face towards the campfire, lighting up his ragged features. ‘For Bea making me feel like I was a worthless piece of shit.’
While desperately trying to draw in a wheezing breath, dread struck deep inside Nina as it all came back to her in a dim rush, like headlights obscured by haze. It was him. The very man who had tried to drag her into his car all those years ago, the same one from the photograph in Bea’s treasure box, and she knew this wasn’t going to end well if she didn’t get away from him.
His hands still clasped around her throat, he brought his face an inch from hers. ‘Bea might be dead now, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have to take my revenge for her leaving me for him, and then rubbing it in my face with that baby.’ His face contorted, his gaze stormy. ‘I didn’t mean for him to die when I took him – I just wanted to scare her and teach her a lesson, make her feel what it’s like to lose someone you love. But I wasn’t used to having a baby to think of, never had one before, and I forgot about him in the back seat of the car one day when it was real hot, and when I remembered, it was too late to save him.’
‘You killed Bea’s baby?’ Nina regretted her snap response as she pictured the news clipping about Bea’s little boy found buried in the shallow grave.
‘Didn’t you just hear me, you stupid bitch?’ His eyes narrowing to slits, spittle flew from his mouth. ‘I didn’t mean for it to happen. It was an accident. Plain and simple.’ His eyes were piercing, like death staring down at her. ‘But when I saw how much his death shattered her, I liked it, and then, when she a
dopted you, I was waiting for my chance to do it to her again, by killing you, but then your boyfriend came along that night and ruined it. And then you left town, and I ended up in jail, so I couldn’t have my fun.’ He sniggered cynically. ‘But I knew you’d be back one day, and I knew I wouldn’t be stuck behind bars my whole life.’
Nina wanted to punch him in the face, claw his disgusting eyeballs out, but any chance of survival meant she had to play nice. ‘I’m sorry she hurt you so badly.’ Every single word hurt as it left her lips, snippets of her life flashing before her eyes – giving birth, travelling, and seeing Logan again. Would she ever get to be grateful for those moments ever again, or was this the end of the line for her?
‘You’re not sorry at all. You think I’m stupid, don’t ya?’ His teeth were bared like a rabid dog’s. ‘You’re trying to make me think you care, when I damn well know you don’t.’
‘I do care.’ Desperate for him to believe her, she stared into his cold, soulless eyes. Tears ran down her cheeks. If she didn’t find a way out of this real quick, this bastard was going to kill her and take every bit of pleasure doing so.
‘All you women are the same, liars who use men to get what they want. I reckon I need to belt some sense into ya, and then I might play with you a little, before I take my hunting knife’ – he patted where it was holstered in a leather holder at his hip – ‘and slit your pretty little neck from ear to ear, like I do the feral pigs when I catch ’em.’ He sucked in a sickening, shuddering breath as he raised his clenched fist.
Gritting her teeth, Nina turned her head and squeezed her eyes shut, silently begging God for her life, when suddenly heavy footsteps burst towards them and someone dove on top of the devil upon her chest. Both men tumbled to the side.
‘You son of a bitch.’ Logan’s voice was distinctive, livid. ‘I told you to stay the hell away from her.’
With lightning speed, Nina watched Logan hook an arm around the startled bloke’s throat and tackle him to the ground. Grunts and groans followed as the two men rolled across the ground. She scrambled to her feet to see Logan gain the upper hand with one swift blow to the man’s jaw, jolting his head to the side. In mere seconds, he had his gun pressed up hard against her attacker’s temple, his finger poised to pull the trigger. But in the blink of an eye, Logan was flipped onto his side and the gun went flying. She watched on helplessly as the two men wrestled for possession of the Glock. Inching towards it, her attacker grabbed hold of the barrel, flipped it, and brought it to Logan’s head. Logan fought for his life in an all-out blaze of kicks and punches. The gun fired in the scuffle, thunderous and echoing. The shot having gone wild, hot air whizzed dangerously past Nina and she dropped to the ground, her hands going over her head. More shots went off, all off target. She remained fastened to the ground, screaming. Terror flooding her veins, she knew she needed to do something.
Now.
Frantically, she lifted her head slightly and darted her gaze for a weapon of sorts. Spotting a lump of timber by the campfire, she jumped up and grabbed it. Then, staying out of her assailant’s line of sight, she ran up behind him and smashed it as hard as she could over the back of his skull. There was a crack, a gunshot, someone cried out, a spray of blood splashed across her shirt. Terrified of what she was about to see, it took her a few seconds to focus, and she was mortified to find both men unmoving. Her assailant had a wound to his head and blood poured like a river from it, pooling beneath him. Collapsed at an awkward angle beside him, blood dribbled from Logan’s mouth and quickly spread beneath the hand he had pressed into his abdomen. His eyes rolling backwards, he was mumbling something she couldn’t decipher.
‘Oh my god, Logan – there’s so much blood.’ She dropped to her knees, cradled his head in her lap. His face was deathly pale. ‘I’m going to get you to a hospital, but you’re going to have to help me get you to your feet, okay?’
Groaning in pain, Logan nodded. She wrapped an arm beneath his shoulder, then lifted him and helped him to stagger over to her Jeep and climb inside.
CHAPTER
23
Sitting opposite her in the waiting room of the local hospital, Officer Vance Robinson tucked his notebook and pen back into the top pocket of his uniform. ‘Thanks for answering all my questions, Nina.’
‘Of course,’ Nina said, her gaze on her hands gripped tightly in her lap. ‘So, he’s dead?’
Vance nodded. ‘That’s what the first officer on the scene has radioed in.’ He paused, drawing in a breath. Resting back into the couch, he gave Nina a reassuring smile. ‘Logan is a strong bloke, Nina, he’s going to pull through this.’
‘I hope so,’ Nina choked out, her mouth feeling as if it were filled with cotton.
‘I know so,’ Vance added confidently, although Nina could see the same fear in his eyes that possessed her every inch. Vance unravelled his towering frame as he stood and straightened. ‘I wish I could wait here with you, but duty calls, and I have to head in to the station.’
Nina brought her teary gaze to the kind-hearted yet commanding man. ‘Okay, and thank you for being so patient with me.’
‘You’ve just been to hell and back, so no thanks needed.’ He handed her an official card with his name stamped at the top. ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can, but can you call me as soon as you know anything?’
‘Of course.’ Nina took it from him and tucked it into her pocket.
Hesitating, he clearly opted for what was on his mind and pulled her to him, offering her comfort with a friendly hug. ‘Stay strong, it’s all going to be okay.’
‘Uh-huh,’ Nina muttered, completely at ease with the man’s genuine kindness.
After a few little reassuring taps to her back, Vance stepped back. ‘Talk soon.’
‘We will.’ Nina watched him step out of the doorway, his heavy footsteps quickly fading away.
She suddenly felt so very alone, so she did all she could do – she pulled out her mobile phone and messaged the only person she wanted by her side right now to help her through this, and then wandered the deserted hallways of the little country hospital, torturing herself with haunting images of standing at Logan’s graveside, a broken woman, having never given their love a proper chance. If Logan made it through this – when Logan made it through this – she was going to give him everything she had, and more. She just hoped he felt the same way. It would crush her if he didn’t.
Almost two hours later, she still hadn’t heard a damn thing. Pacing the floors was doing her no good, the not knowing was becoming more and more terrifying by the minute – she was just about ready to climb the damn walls. Slumping down, she leant forwards and dropped her head into her hands, heaving a weighty sigh. If Logan died, she’d never forgive herself. This was entirely her fault. If she hadn’t acted so selfishly and hung up on him, if she’d taken a breath and looked at the positives – that she now had a father, the possibility of meeting her daughter, and a wonderful man who loved her deeply – instead of focusing on the negatives like she tended to do, things would be so very different. If she’d stopped for a mere second to acknowledge she was very much like William, having given up her daughter for reasons she’d felt significant at the time, she’d have to really ask herself, who was she to lay judgement upon him, or Logan, for doing as Bea had asked?
‘Nina.’
It was a hushed word, but drifted upon Nina’s ears as if a tender kiss. The closing of the sliding doors followed a surge of balmy wind as she brought her gaze to William’s, and then, to her surprise, her daughter’s, as the two of them came rushing towards her, arm in arm.
‘Brianna? William?’ Wide-eyed, Nina sucked in an anxious breath while blinking back the sudden onslaught of tears.
‘Nina, sweetheart, we came as quickly as we could.’ Like a comforting embrace, William’s gentle voice wrapped around Nina as he took long hurried strides towards her. Brianna matched him step for step with her long legs.
‘Brianna?’ Nina half whispered again. Was
she so tired she was imagining things?
Brianna offered her a small nervous smile.
Nina’s heart reached out. Her girl was really here. Feeling as if she could suddenly run a marathon, Nina leapt to her feet and ran down the long hallway, arms outstretched. Brianna did the same, the two of them meeting in a tight embrace, sobbing into each other’s shoulders. They remained like that for a few long moments before untwining, but still held each other by the hand, tightly, as if both were afraid to let go.
‘Hi.’ Brianna’s lips were quivering almost as much as the fingers Nina was holding on to.
‘Hi, yourself.’ Nina reached out and gently cupped Brianna’s cheek. ‘You’re so beautiful, my love. I can’t believe I’m actually looking into your eyes for the third time in your life.’
‘Third time?’ Brianna tipped her head a little.
‘Yes, when you were born and I held you in my arms …’ Nina had to stop and take a breath, the memory poignant. ‘… And then when I came and got some dinner the other night, and now.’
‘It does explain why you were so uncomfortable and upset.’ Brianna gave Nina’s hand a gentle squeeze. ‘How was the tiramisu?’
‘Divine.’ Nina glanced at William, who was hovering just far enough behind to give them a little privacy.
‘I told you it was yummy,’ Brianna said with a smile.
‘Yes, you did.’ Her throat tight with emotion, Nina stole a moment to try and somehow regroup. ‘I’m so sorry we have to meet like this, here, of all places.’
‘The universe works in very strange ways, sometimes. I’m just thankful you’re okay.’ Brianna wiped her eyes with a scrunched-up tissue she’d just pulled from her pocket, sniffling. ‘Mum and Dad told me all about you and Logan this afternoon, and we were going to call you tomorrow morning, to invite you for dinner, because I really wanted to meet you both, but then this all happened, and it didn’t feel right, not being here with you. I hope you don’t mind me coming?’