by Chloe Morgan
REASONS TO BREATHE
CHLOE MORGAN
CONTENTS
Description
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Epilogue
Want More?
About the Author
Copyright
Description
I just needed a fresh start. A new place to raise my little one as I worked to pull my life back together. It’s never been an easy life, raising my kiddo alone, but I find strength in the little things. The kind woman that I work for has been like a second mother. And I had no clue how hot her marine son was until he comes home for a visit. The guy is 100% alpha male. Everything I find attractive and usually fall hard for. He’s got a decision to make. Leave the service or reenlist? Time is ticking down. But the longer he stays, the more I want him to stay. Where love didn’t seem like a possibility before, I feel like I’ve found a reason to breathe. Him.
Chapter 1
Dane
“Married? You’re getting hitched to a woman you’ve only known for six months?” Stephen asked.
“When you know, you know,” Lakely said.
“Why the fuck would you want to attach yourself to one woman for the rest of your life?” I asked.
“I mean, come on. We know you, Lakely. You’re as bad as they come with women. You could get pussy for the rest of your life,” Stephen said.
“I love her, guys. She’s completely different from all those barracks bunnies who get a thrill from fucking soldiers,” Lakely said.
“Do you really want a life of decorative guest towels you can’t actually use and coconut milk in your cereal?” I asked.
“Wait, women actually put coconut milk in their cereal?” Lakely asked.
“Really? That’s the least of your worries? I’d be more worried about the fact that I didn’t know what the hell my wife was doing when I was deployed,” Stephen asked.
“Well, it’s a good thing you’re getting out, then, right?” Lakely asked.
“Yeah. Now, if only I could convince Dane here to come with me,” Stephen said.
“I’m still not sold on the idea,” I said.
“And anyway, those deployments you really have to watch out for. There’s a reason why men leave other people in their units to watch over their wives,” Stephen said.
“You really think Gloria’s that kind of woman?” Lakely asked.
“Okay, okay. I think it’s time we stop with the teasing,” I said.
“And here I was just getting started,” Stephen said, smiling.
“Lakely, she’s a nice gal. I’m still not thrilled at the fact that you’ve only known her six months. But it’s your life. And if you’re happy, we’re happy,” I said.
“Don’t let this guy get to your head too much, though,” Stephen said, grinning.
“Yeah. I could definitely say the same about you and that jaded heart of yours,” I said.
“Not my fault my ex-wife cheated on me and tried to pawn off someone else’s child as mine when I got back from Korea,” Stephen said.
“Wait, that’s what happened to you and Leslie?” Lakely asked.
“Ignore him,” I said. I grabbed Lakely’s shoulders and leveled my eyes with him. “Congratulations.”
I sent Lakely off to celebrate his engagement with some of the other guys before I turned back to Stephen. I shot him a look as he folded his arms over his chest and shrugged.
“Really? The Korea bit?” I asked.
“What? It’s more entertaining than what actually happened. Plus, it gets my point across,” Stephen said.
“She left you because she got tired of you constantly accusing her of cheating.”
“Well, you can’t say I don’t have a point. How many guys have we come across in our time as Marines who have been cheated on, and worse, by their wives while they were away?”
He did have a good point. We’d come across a lot of them.
“Have you ever thought about having a family?” I asked.
“I don’t have a thought of anything right now. My mind is set on what I’m doing once I get out. Just a few more months, you know,” he said.
“Looking for jobs already?”
“Still trying to figure out what the hell I’m gonna do with my years in the service. I’m sure they translate to something, but I’m not sure what. I still think you should get out with me, though. We enlisted together. We re-enlisted together. It think it’s only right we go out together.”
“What if I don’t want to get out yet?” I asked.
“After our last deployment?” he asked.
I didn’t want to think about what went down on that mission.
“Hamilton! Cane! My office,” the colonel called out.
I looked over at Stephen before I sighed.
“What did we do this time?” I asked.
“I don’t know. We haven’t pulled a good prank in a while,” Stephen said.
We walked into his office and found our commanding officer sitting at his desk. He was stamping and signing shit like his life depended on it. I stood there at attention, with my fists at my side, while he waited to acknowledge us.
“At ease,” the colonel said.
“Thank fuck,” Stephen whispered.
“Everything all right?” I asked.
“The two of you have a month off. Pack your bags and go home,” the colonel said.
“What?” I asked.
“Oh, yes,” Stephen said, smiling.
“This last deployment was hard on all of us. The unit’s been given a month of leave. Mandatory, to get our minds right. I’m not to see you on this base for four weeks. Understood?”
“But we only have three more months on our contracts,” I said.
“So what?” Stephen asked.
“I’m well aware of that, soldier. But I’m hoping the two of you will take the month to set your mind right and consider extending your time with the Marines.”
“What?” Stephen asked.
I watched in silence as our colonel stood.
“You two are the best chief warrant officers to ever come under my command. I know this last deployment did a lot of things to you guys. Lakely’s done gone and gotten engaged, and I hear there are whispers of you two not re-enlisting. I’m hoping a month off at home will help you in your decision to re-up again.”
“Yes, sir,” I said.
But Stephen didn’t say anything.
“The two of you are dismissed. I want you off the premises of the base by ten hundred tomorrow. That’s an order,” the colonel said.
“Yes, sir,” we said in unison.
We turned on our heels like we always had in the Marines and walked out of his office. I drew in a deep breath, considering my options. If I re-enlisted, I was well on my way to becoming a captain. Only a few more years and a few more tests and I’d be able to wear that title with pride.
“I don’t need time to think about it. I’m out. And you should really think about joining me,” Stephen murmured.
Stephen was my best friend, and I knew he had the best intentions at heart. But I liked where I was at. Yes, the deployment was rough. Yes, I could use some time off, like now. I’d busted my ass to
get to where I was in the Marines, though. I was proud of my service to my country. I enjoyed the traveling. I enjoyed pushing my limits, knowing I was making a damn difference in a country that seemed to be going to hell.
Then again, that was the exact argument Stephen used to justify him getting out.
I saw both sides of the coin, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to get out of the military. It had treated me well as an eighteen-year-old with no trajectory in life.
“Let’s get home first. I’ll think about it there,” I said.
Chapter 2
Erin
“Erin! Good morning. How are you?” Claire asked.
“I’m okay. On my third cup of coffee,” I said.
“Rough night with the little one?”
“Stuffy noses are the worst,” I said, sighing.
“Well, how have things been going at home? You know, other than the stuffy nose,” Claire said.
“Other than that, Hailey’s been okay,” I said.
“You’re part of that ‘home,’ you know. How are you doing, Erin?”
I shrugged. “I’m okay. You know, same old same old.”
“You picked up your paycheck this morning, right?”
“I went to the bank this morning with it before I clocked in for work,” I said.
“Good. And it went through okay?”
“It did, Miss Claire. Thank you.”
“Of course, sweet girl. Always.”
Miss Claire had opened her arms to me the second I got into town. Truth be told, I was still settling in. Life had thrown a series of curveballs at me that left me breathless and without a family. My daughter, Hailey, was almost two years old, but she’d never known anyone else but me. When I got pregnant, her father took off. Wanted nothing to do with us. And my parents? Well, they were disappointed that I couldn’t keep the man around long enough to marry me. Traditions, and all. They tolerated my existence for a little while, let me “leech off their insurance,” as they called it, so I could get to my appointments during my pregnancy.
But I became too much of a burden, so they kicked me out.
At six months pregnant, I had nowhere to go. I was in the middle of Boulder, Colorado, with no job prospects, no roof over my head, and no way to pay for my prenatals. I went to the nearby women’s shelter and they housed me for a little while. Helped me put in my job application to places. Set me up with a doctor from the clinic down the road to make sure my pregnancy progressed along. But it became clear quickly that Boulder didn’t have a life for me.
Not with a family and a man that had abandoned me.
So, I snuck into my parents’ house one night and packed up my things. I stuffed as many of my clothes and valuables into my suitcases as I could. I used trash bags for the rest, stuffed it all in the back of my car, and cleaned out my parents’ wallets of the cash they had on hand.
Then, I took off and headed west.
I ran out of gas in a small town called Maiden, surrounded by mountains and cold as fuck. I was six months pregnant, stranded on the side of the road, with three hundred dollars in my pocket and no gas station in sight.
Miss Claire was the one who had found me on the side of the road that night.
“Has Hailey had any other issues with her asthma lately?” Claire asked.
“Not since that one episode a couple weeks back. I got her into a doctor, though, and they put her on an inhaler,” I said.
“Is it those ones with the snout that you slip the thing into at the end?”
“Yes, actually. How did you know?”
“My son, Dane, needed one of those as a kid. In fact, he used an inhaler until he was almost ten. But he grew out of it. And I’m sure Hailey will, too,” she said.
“How is he doing?” I asked.
“Okay, far as I can tell. He doesn’t talk much after his deployments. But I can’t really blame him on that. I can’t imagine some of the things my little boy has seen.”
“Does he come home often?”
“When he can. And he always comes with a bouquet of flowers in his hand,” she said, smiling.
“That’s sweet.”
“He’s a sweetheart. Underneath that towering exterior is a puppy dog who just wants to be scratched behind his ear.”
I giggled at the image of it all.
“Miss Claire, I just want to thank you again for giving me that promotion. It means more to me and Hailey than you’ll ever know,” I said.
“You’ve worked hard at this place for almost two years now. It was about damn time I gave you one,” she said.
The night Miss Claire had found me, she’d brought me to her home. After filling up my gas tank, of course. She provided me with a warm bed and a place to sleep. She got me into the trusted obstetrician in town and footed the clinic bills until I got back on my feet. I worked part-time at a gas station before I slipped and fell. Seven months pregnant and it swung me into preterm labor.
She stuck by my side through the worker’s comp battle that raged on for months after the fact.
My daughter was my world. The worker’s comp payout footed the hospital bill, which was extravagant given her NICU stay. There I was, in a strange city surrounded by strange people with no debt to my name, but no job. No way to pay my regular bills, like my cell phone. No way to keep up my car insurance. Or my medical benefits.
Until Miss Claire hired me to work at her interior design company.
At first, I only took the job because of the medical benefits. Hailey had many complications as an infant and was still developing them as she matured. Right now, it was acute asthma. But before that, it was problems with her eyesight. And before that? Problems with ear infections. I had to keep the medical benefits moving forward for Hailey’s sake, and this latest promotion by Miss Claire gave me the option to add dental to our plan.
Something Hailey really needed.
“I just wanted to thank you for it. It means more to me and Hailey than you’ll ever know,” I said.
“Trust me, if I could pay you more right now, I would,” Miss Claire said.
Every once in a while, I heard her mention her son, Dane. Usually, it was when we were talking about Hailey. But she always spoke highly of her son. I could tell the two of them were close. I hoped one day to still be close like that to my daughter after she grew up. I worked my day alongside Miss Claire, taking phone calls and arranging appointments and generally cleaning up.
And before I knew it, it was time to go home.
“Whitney? I’m home!” I exclaimed.
“We’re back here. Breathing treatment!” Whitney called out.
I dropped my things and tore through the small house. I leapt over the couch, listening as my daughter’s whimpers hit my ears. I skidded to a stop in front of them and dropped to my knees, taking Hailey’s hands within mine.
“Deep breaths, princess. I’m right here,” I said.
I held back my tears as Whitney fought with my daughter to get her to draw in a deep breath. I kissed my daughter’s hands and rubbed her stomach. Then finally, I heard Hailey breathing easier again. I drew in deep breaths with her, mimicking her sounds instead of coaching her through things. I was thankful for my sister. I was thankful for her coming and finding me after she figured out Mom and Dad had thrown me out. I was thankful that she followed after me and told me she was on my side. And when she came swooping back into my life when Hailey was seven months old, telling me she’d help me, I cried in her arms and thanked her.
But there were times where I still felt alone.
“How many times have you done this today?” I asked.
“This is the second time,” Whitney said.
I shook my head as she handed my daughter to me.
“I took tonight off from the diner, in case you need extra help,” my sister said.
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said.
“No, but I wanted to. Hailey’s been struggling here lately. You shouldn’t be doing it alone.”
I cradled Hailey close as she cried on my shoulder, sniffling and gasping for air as I smoothed my hand up and down her back. I dipped down and kissed my sister on the top of her head, thankful that she could watch my daughter during the day while I was at work.
“There’s some frozen pizza in the freezer,” I said.
“You don’t have to tell me twice,” Whitney said.
“I love you. You know that, right?”
My sister turned around in the doorway and smiled.
“I love you too, Erin.”
Chapter 3
Dane
“It feels good to be back home,” Stephen said.
I drew in a breath of fresh air as we walked out of the airport with our bags in hand. He was right. It did feel good to be back, even if only for a month. The mountains greeted us as we flew over the state lines, and their beauty captured me as I stood there waiting for a taxi. I’d never get used to their snowcapped sights year-round. It was something that had entranced me as a kid. Something I knew would never grow old, no matter how many times I saw it.
“Earth to Dane. Can you hear me?” Stephen asked.
“Sorry. What?” I asked.
“I asked if you called your mom to tell her you’re coming home.”
“I’d rather it be a surprise. I’ve always informed her of when I’m coming home. I’ve never done one of those surprise things before.”
“Yeah, because you think they’re kitschy and weird,” he said, chuckling.