by Kate Rudolph
“The captain?” That was the higher voice, one that she was almost certain was Taryn now that she was trying to figure it out. “Don’t you mean the first mate?”
“He’ll always be the captain, no matter his rank,” said the lower voice, probably Malax.
“If Alleyva hears you saying that, you’ll be the one out on your ass at Honora,” Taryn shot back.
“And would you go with me if I was?”
Taryn sighed. “You know it, needy alien.”
Andie held herself still, praying to gods she’d long ago given up on that the two didn’t start making out. It was uncomfortable enough to hear them in the middle of the night. But the two seemed to hold back, subsiding into their previous conversation.
“We can’t afford to be carrying a tourist around with us, I don’t think Alleyva will go for it for long. And that kid isn’t cut out for this life. Chances are she takes off the first chance she gets and scurries back home.” Andie didn’t know how she was going to look at Taryn the next time she saw her if this was how the Oscavian woman thought of her.
“People may surprise you,” Malax cautioned.
“I suppose.” Their voices trailed off as they moved away and Andie slouched back in her chair, squeezing her eyes shut tight to prevent anything slipping out. She’d had years of practice to get her reactions under control, and nothing about being on the Seventh had told her she could lower her guard. She wasn’t going to cry, but at a moment like this she almost wished that she could.
Maybe Taryn was right. Maybe she should just call it quits and go home. She’d never wanted to be an outlaw, never wanted to steal from people or hurt them. She had no idea what she’d been thinking.
She unbuckled the safety harness and stood, unsure if she was about to go find Captain Alleyva and ask to be taken home or if she was just going to wander the ship and listen for more conversations that made her feel half a meter tall. If she went back to Earth now she could make a life there, something she still understood. She’d banished all hope of that after a few years on Ixilta, but maybe not as completely as she’d thought if the whispers of memories were still there for her to think about. She could find a nice human man, get a job she actually liked, maybe have a kid or two someday. It would all be very... ordinary.
No purple skinned, blue eyed outlaws would be there to send her heart beating hard and confuse her emotions until she didn’t know which way was up. No whispers from a crew who had no reason to like her and plenty of reason to resent her presence. No more excitement, just safety.
Oh, screw that.
If she needed to pull her weight on the ship, she’d find a way to pull her weight. They were down at least one crew member; she knew that much since Xandr had killed a man and been shoved in prison for it. Everyone currently on the Seventh’s crew had been around for years. That meant there was room for Andie, she just had to figure out how to make herself fit.
If she’d survived and made a place for herself on Ixilta, she could do it here. And here they didn’t seem near as likely to beat her or murder her. That was definitely an improvement.
She left her room and followed the sounds of the crew to where they were all gathered in the storage bay. It was huge, belying the fact that they were on a relatively small space ship. If Andie ever started to feel claustrophobic she’d come here. The soaring ceilings were enough to help her remember that she wasn’t trapped, even if it was only the metal walls of the ship keeping everyone on board alive and safe from the vacuum of space.
She didn’t see Xandr, not that she was looking. Captain Alleyva stood next to Kiran, giving him instructions. Malax and Taryn were working in a corner, cataloging large crates that must have contained whatever they’d retrieved from their last mission. No one was speaking loudly, but the hush that swept over the room when her presence was noted was enough to make Andie want to shrink back. Alleyva had the kind of stare that could tear a person to pieces with one tiny shift of expression. She looked exactly like what Andie imagined an outlaw alien captain would look like, that or some far off royalty. She understood that Xandr was a captain, could feel the authority he wore like a mantle, but he’d never managed to make her feel so... insignificant.
“Are you looking for something?” Captain Alleyva finally asked her, tone even.
Andie straightened her spine, standing as tall as she could manage. It wasn’t something she would have ever done on Ixilta. Back hom─back on Ixilta, it was better to look small, but she didn’t want that now. She needed the crew to respect her, and she couldn’t gain that respect by hiding in her room. “I wanted to see if there was anything I could do to help.” It didn’t come out as confident as she would have liked, but Andie had made her move. She braced for the rejection that was bound to come, but she couldn’t control Alleyva’s reactions.
But the captain didn’t reject her outright. Her eyes narrowed and she studied Andie like she was some sort of alien species, which technically was correct, as Andie was the only human in the room. “Can you operate a lift?” the captain finally asked.
Relief surged through Andie and she nodded. “Yes, lift, teleporter, small transport, you name it, I can figure it out.”
“I didn’t ask if you could figure it out.” The words were cold enough to freeze.
“I know how to work a lift,” Andie promised. She’d been charged with working a teleporter on Ixilta but getting shipments to the transport station had sometimes required using other heavy machinery. Andie’d had to figure out how to use it all or risk getting reassigned to a much less pleasant job, and she’d been working with those machines for years.
The captain gave a swift nod, not questioning it further. “Take over for Malax so he can start his checks on the engine. Taryn will show you what you’re doing.”
Great, just the people Andie was looking to avoid. Too bad. She caged any of the hurt she might have been feeling and schooled her expression into something neutral. Taryn and Malax didn’t need to know that she’d overheard them.
Malax had already shuffled away by the time Andie made it to Taryn. Though he’d been tapped to help out with the job, his normal duties were in the engine room, where he was responsible for keeping the ship flying. Another sign that Xandr’s crew was short staffed.
Andie found the lift secured to one of the walls and figured out how to unlock it without help. She drove it over to where Taryn was waiting and listened as Taryn gave her instructions. The crates needed to be secured in the cubbies high in the ceiling. Andie hadn’t realized that they were there, and they must have been meant to store purloined goods. She didn’t ask what was in the crates or make any comment about smuggler’s niches. She knew that the crew worked outside the law—that had never been hidden from her—and she was still here, so she couldn’t complain that she was aiding and abetting criminals. After all, that had been the entire reason she’d climbed out of her quarters and come to find the captain.
They made quick work of getting the crates hidden and once they were all secured Andie used the lift to replace several wall panels, effectively hiding the storage place in case the ship came up for inspection in any legitimate port. She hadn’t asked, but the Seventh had to have some sort of cover identity, perhaps as a mercenary crew or cargo ship. They weren’t pirates, which meant they straddled the line between legitimate and illegitimate jobs but could still take shelter at places like Honora Station which guarded fiercely against pirates.
When the cargo was stored, Andie wanted to ask the captain for more to do, but she was gone, so Andie shadowed Taryn as she cleaned up, helping her sweep the place and get it set up for the bots that came in on a set schedule to disinfect the floors and walls. It didn’t take long. Space was at a premium on a ship and tidiness was too important to let it fall by the wayside.
Taryn gave her a small thanks when they were done and led Andie out of the cargo hold, careful not to leave her alone in there. Andie knew it was one part safety, two parts caution. Most of the li
fe support and temperature controls were diverted from storage when there was nothing that needed oxygen or heat. If a crew member was stuck in there, it could turn deadly. But the big reason Taryn kept her away was that there was plenty of cargo they wouldn’t want her to get her hands on, like the loot she’d just helped store. Andie wanted to promise she wasn’t trying to steal or find out anything she wasn’t supposed to know, but she feared that it might make her look more suspicious, which would go against her plan to become trusted by the crew. She wanted to growl in frustration, but she kept her emotions in check. Taryn already didn’t like her, and there was no reason to make things worse.
She and Taryn parted ways when Taryn headed towards the engine room, probably to find Malax. That left Andie with nothing to do but wander. She supposed she could go see if Sayevi wanted company, but she feared that Xandr was there and she didn’t know what she’d say to him if she found him. They probably needed to have a talk, needed to discuss whether she actually had a place on this ship, but she feared that more than she did the captain’s scorn. If Xandr told her that she should leave the Seventh then she’d have to go. His... whatever... was the only reason she’d been able to stay so long. If he was over whatever had made him offer her a place a week ago then she’d have nothing but a long journey back to Earth to look forward to and a planet where no one was missing her.
Her room was the best option. She had a book, she could keep herself entertained. And she could take some time to plan how to ingratiate herself with Captain Alleyva and figure out what she wanted to say to Xandr.
But when she rounded the corner to the crew quarters, she smacked right into the hard chest of one of the men on board and her eyes snapped shut as if she could avoid this meeting. Of course, she’d literally run into Xandr the second she decided that she didn’t want to see him.
“Sorry,” the giant muttered, his voice soft and non-threatening, nothing like the one she’d grown accustomed to on Ixilta.
Andie forced her eyes open and offered a sheepish smile to Damaris Hayk. The doctor was just as tall as Xandr, though his skin was a more human beige; not dark like her, but definitely something she’d expect to see on Earth. He had short hair that was a mix of blond and brown and brown eyes that seemed to be hiding something. Just looking at him, she’d think he was human, but for some reason she couldn’t make herself believe it. Since he wasn’t wearing an identification badge or anything, she’d just have to wonder.
“I should have been looking where I was going,” Andie replied. “The hallways are narrow.”
“You’ll get used to it,” Hayk promised, sliding around her without making it look like any trouble. He continued on his way without a farewell, but Andie had already noticed that the doctor was abrupt and didn’t hold it against him.
At least he wasn’t Xandr. It seemed impossible that she could avoid the man for long on a ship as small as the Seventh, but she’d do her best to try, at least until she had her head on straight. She couldn’t depend on him for her to keep her position on the ship, but she feared if she saw him now she’d beg him to do something, even if it was just make her forget about her predicament for a few hours.
But her luck ran out when Andie made it to her room. There, leaning against the door to her quarters, was Xandr.
ANDIE LOOKED TENSE. Her shoulders were drawn up and her eyes narrowed at him, probably unhappy to see him. Xandr had been trained from a young age to read all different kinds of people, and it wasn’t the kind of skill he could shut off. Besides, the majority of people were terrible at hiding anything but the most basic of surface emotions. Andie was a little better than most, but she clearly hadn’t been expecting him. It only took a second for her to visibly relax herself and smooth her features into something bland and unassuming, something that wouldn’t have been out of place on Ixilta.
No, he couldn’t have that. For the first time in a week he had time to spend with her, time to talk and touch and figure out what they wanted to do now. He didn’t want her to be guarding against some attack or scheme. He didn’t run his ship like that, and he wasn’t about to start playing games. At least, nothing like palace intrigue. He’d have plenty of fun playing a sexier game with her, one that ended with both of them winning.
He pushed off the wall and took a step towards her until they were only a breath apart. He had to look down to see her, and though he knew his height could be imposing he didn’t step away, especially not when Andie swayed a bit towards him before catching herself and pulling back. She liked his stature, liked that he looked like he could fell a rampaging beast with his bare hands. But she didn’t want to like it.
Xandr could work with that.
He reached a hand up slowly until he was close enough to tuck a curly lock of her dark hair behind her ear. It had escaped the band she used to hold it back, and Xandr wanted to dig his hands in and feel the soft, springy strands around his fingers. Her skin gleamed brown with a warm undertone under the lights, though it had lost some of its luster from the lack of sunlight. She might need vitamin supplements from the doctor, but that was something they could deal with later. She looked fierce standing before him, defiant, though she clearly wanted to tamp down whatever she was feeling.
Xandr’s instincts pounded within him, demanding he kiss her, claim her mouth as his own and show her exactly what her place was on this ship.
But they’d barely spoken in a week and he wasn’t some common brute who’d take what he wanted and damn the consequences. Though looking at Andie’s full lips tempted him enough to wonder if one kiss would really be that far beyond the pale.
“It seems like the mission went well,” Andie said, not quite stepping back, but using her words to put a space between them.
“Very well,” Xandr agreed. He hadn’t spoken to anyone about his secret worries that something would go wrong, either since he was no longer the captain or because it had been so long since he’d pulled a job, but he wondered what Andie would say if he let her know those private thoughts. The curiosity was fleeting, and he quashed it before it could grow. He’d be captain again one day, and he didn’t need anyone to know his weaknesses. Perhaps especially not Andie.
Silence fell between them for an awkward moment before Andie smiled her forced smile again. “I helped the crew when they came back, made myself useful.”
“Good.” He liked to hear she was carving a place for herself on the ship. With a crew as tightly knit as this one he knew it could be difficult, but he trusted Andie to be resourceful. “Don’t let them take advantage,” he cautioned. “They’ll give you all the shit work if they think you’ll take it.”
“I’m sure they will,” Andie agreed. She cast her eyes over his shoulder, looking at the door to her room before looking back at him. “I─”
“Xandr, I told you to be back in fifteen minutes.” Keana’s voice crackled over the intercom, reminding Xandr that he’d stolen these few minutes away to see Andie and he still had things to get done. And that he wasn’t in charge anymore. He wasn’t going to play cheap power games with Keana, not when she’d kept the crew alive and the ship intact while he rotted in a cell. But it rankled to be reminded that he wasn’t in charge anymore.
“Duty calls,” he said regretfully. “Will you be joining us for dinner?” He knew Andie had been sticking to her room for most of the last week and sneaking meals with Sayevi or when the rest of the crew was busy.
She looked ready to say no, but her expression shifted and she gave a decisive nod. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”
He wanted to say something else, wanted to somehow step back to how things were a week ago when everything had felt so right between them. But they weren’t running for their lives anymore, and everything around them reminded him that things weren’t as simple as he wished. They’d run from enemy fire and ended their story with a kiss.
Except the story wasn’t over, and Xandr wasn’t sure when they’d kiss again.
He left Andie at her door with a far
ewell and headed to Keana’s office. He’d see Andie again, and hopefully by then he’d know what the hell he was doing.
CHAPTER THREE
OPERATION INGRATIATE wasn’t going terribly. Andie made a point of seeking out one or two crew members every day and offering her services. It involved a lot of fetching and carrying and more than a little cleaning, but she was starting to get smiles when she ran into people during meal times instead of hostile blank faces. Dr. Hayk had actually trusted her to review the inventory of some of their less critical medical supplies and Sayevi had let her fly the ship. Okay, so she’d sat in the pilot’s seat for about two minutes while Sayevi took a bathroom break and the autonav did most of the work, but Andie was still counting it.
Captain Alleyva hadn’t exactly warmed up, but she seemed to have caught on to what Andie was doing and Andie was almost certain she’d given a nod of approval when she caught Andie heading towards the engine room to see if she could do anything for Malax.
So her second week on the ship passed a little better than the first. Though the weirdness between her and Xandr still hadn’t resolved itself. Every time it looked like they’d have a moment alone something separated them, usually Captain Alleyva calling on Xandr to do some first mate’s duty that Andie hadn’t realized existed. And from the looks of frustration that Xandr shot at the intercom anytime Alleyva called for him, he hadn’t realized that those duties existed either.
They’d both gone for lunch at the same time and by some miracle the rest of the crew was elsewhere. The galley had a small rec room off to one side and was usually where everyone congregated when not actively working, but they must have been busy at that moment. Xandr had shoveled his food into his mouth so fast Andie feared he’d get a stomach ache, but when the intercom called for him only five minutes later she understood his haste.