by Danni Roan
“Yes, my sister Michelle lives there.”
“You mean the crazy lady with the pony cart,” Daisy laughed. “I know her. She took me for a ride once and I’ll never forget it.”
Marissa laughed, picking up on the sparkle of the other woman’s eyes. “Michelle is a bit reckless sometimes,” she agreed.
“How is Michelle and that precious little Kadence? If he isn’t the sweetest little boy in the world.”
“They’re fine,” Marissa said looking up as Trace placed mugs on the table then hurried back to the stove. “I’m visiting with them for the summer,” she continued. “I’m a teacher and have some time off before I go back to work.”
“Will you finish the whole year?” Daisy asked as Trace returned filling the mugs from a steaming kettle. “Or will you take your leave?”
Marissa opened her mouth then closed it turning to glare at Trace. Had he brought her here so that his sister could convince her that she only had one course of action?
Daisy looked up at her brother noting his slumped shoulders, and tired eyes then sighed. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “It’s none of my business. I’m afraid I’m far too forward, and I didn’t mean to pry.”
Marissa looked back at her host and shook her head. Trace’s sister seemed genuinely upset by her mistake, and something in Marissa turned feeling compassion and respect for the girl with the crippled legs.
“It’s alright,” she said. “I just haven’t thought ahead very far yet. I’m not sure what my plans are.”
Trace looked at his sister whose eyes had grown wide, but he shook his head stopping any comment. There was no point arguing with Marissa if she wasn’t ready to listen. He knew he would personally do anything he could to convince her to keep the baby she was trying to pretend wasn’t real.
A soft wailing drifted to them from another room and Daisy grabbed her walking sticks preparing to rise.
“I’ll get it,” Trace said slipping through the door on silent feet and disappearing into the darkened building.
“I am sorry,” Daisy said. “I’m afraid I don’t miss much in my line of work. How far along are you?”
“About twelve weeks,” Marissa said. She had known much earlier, but Ray walking away had thrown her for a loop, and she still hadn’t completely gotten her head around the issue.
“You know this is what I do right?” Daisy said the compassion in her voice so rich it nearly choked Marissa. “If I can help, please let me know.”
For some reason, Marissa couldn’t feel angry with the woman. There was something so real, so carring about her that it seemed to fill the entire kitchen with some strange presence.
“I know,” Marissa said feeling more confused than ever as she dropped her head, only looking up when Trace stepped back into the room with a squirming infant in his arms.
“Bottles are already in the fridge,” Daisy said smiling at her brother, who was crooning to the baby in his arms. A few seconds later, he had heated a bottle and joined them at the table as he fed the baby.
“I see why you did so good with Megan,” Marissa mused watching the man. Instead of looking put out by the child, Trace seemed comfortable and at ease sitting at the table and offering a nighttime feeding.
“I told you I’ve had lots of practice,” Trace said offering her a grin that made him seem even more handsome than before.
“Give him to me,” Daisy said reaching for the baby. “You still need to get Marissa home. One of the girls will be in soon, and they can help me if I need it.”
“You sure?” Trace asked settling the baby in Daisy’s arms.
“You know I do this every day,” Daisy said. “Go on.”
Trace stood collecting the now empty cups and taking them to the sink. “I guess we’d better go,” he said.
Marissa followed him out of the quiet center as a thousand thoughts raced through her head. In her heart, she knew she wanted something more, but she just couldn’t believe it was possible.
“So that’s Daisy,” she said as Trace helped her into his truck. “She seems too perfect to be true.” Marissa knew she was being snappish, but the very nice evening had turned to a muddle in her brain. “Did you two cook this up between you just to get me here,” she added as Trace closed his door.
“What?” he said turning to look at her. “Why would you say that?”
“You’re the one that gave me her card when we first met. I suppose you sat down one night and figured out how to get me here. Is that why you asked me out in the first place?”
“No, not at all,” Trace insisted. “I do this kind of thing all the time,” he defended. “Daisy knows she can call me any time there’s an issue. I’ve worked with her and the center for years. We didn’t plot to get you there it just happened.”
Marissa crossed her arms over her middle as Trace started the truck and turned back toward the Broken J. She knew she was being ridiculous, but she couldn’t seem to shake the feeling of guilt and shame that engulfed her. She was a modern woman and she knew her rights. She didn’t need any backcountry cowboy trying to tell her what to do with her body.
“Marissa,” Trace’s voice was soft. “I asked you out because I like you, and because I thought you might enjoy a night out. Some time to forget about everything and have some fun.”
Marissa looked at the cowboy but his eyes were on the road. Did he mean what he said? How was she supposed to know?
“You’re kind of preachy. You know that,” she spat. “I suppose you know what’s right for me because your sweet sister is a rescuer of unwanted babies.”
Trace concentrated on the road as he desperately prayed for the right words. How could he make her know that he wanted what was good and right for her?
“I don’t know what is right for you,” he finally spoke, “but I do know that you made a choice a while ago, and now you have to think of someone other than yourself. I knew when I saw you that morning by the fence that you were worried and confused.” He paused but continued before she could speak. “I think you want this baby,” he said. “I don’t know anything about the surrounding circumstances, but I know that you have a brand new life inside you and that is a gift that no one should throw away. You have options, Marissa. I just hope you’ll choose one that you won’t regret for the rest of your life.”
Marissa squirmed in her seat. In her heart, she wanted this baby, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to do this on her own. How was she supposed to go back to work this fall and explain everything to her students?
“What options?” she said, her voice rough. “If I do this, I’ll be a single mom, and on a teaching salary that is not a great thing to be. If I put the baby up for adoption, everyone will know. I’m a teacher, after all. We are judged differently that other people.”
“What if you were married?” Trace said the words tumbling out of his mouth so fast they didn’t even register.
Marissa huffed a bitter laugh. “Oh, do I get to wave my magic wand, and a miracle husband will appear?” she growled.
“I don’t know,” Trace admitted. “Kade put in an order for a wife and got one. These things do happen.”
Marissa shook her head. “I’ll figure this out on my own,” she shot back. “I don’t need anyone meddling in my life.”
Trace pulled the truck over in an open field and shut off the headlights letting the stars above twinkle down into the cab. “I think you do,” he said turning to look at her, one arm resting on the back of the seat and the other draped over the steering wheel. “I think you want someone meddling in your life. Someone you can depend on who will help you and give you a way out of this situation that you can live with.”
“Huh,” Marissa said, anger bringing tears to her eyes. “Like who? I don’t see any knight in shining armor charging to the rescue,” she said dashing at her eyes.
Trace reached out taking the hand that she had used to swipe at her tears. “I’ll do it,” he said, his voice a hushed whisper. “I’ll do whatev
er it takes to help you Marissa.”
Marissa turned, focusing tear-filled eyes on the cowboy next to her. “And what exactly would you be willing to do?” she asked. “I have to go home in a few weeks. Are you going to move in with me? Take care of me? I can take care of myself.”
“I’ll marry you,” Trace said his warm hand still wrapped around hers. “I’ll marry you, and after the baby is born, you can divorce me, and I take custody of the child.”
Marissa’s breath froze in her throat. Was the man serious? Did he think that he could make it all better by marrying her?
“Are you insane?” she asked her voice harsh. “How is that supposed to work with you here and me in Illinois?”
“I don’t know, but we can make it work. Marissa, just give it a chance. You’ll get everything you want from the deal. You won’t have to change your lifestyle. All you have to do is give it a few months, and then you can go back to the way things were if that is what you want.”
“You’re serious,” Marissa said her eyes wide as she studied his sincere face.
“I am,” Trace admitted. “When I was five, my mom decided she didn’t want to be pregnant and took a bunch of pills. My dad found her before it was too late, but you met Daisy, you saw what happened. It was a miracle Daisy lived, and we both loved her, but as soon as she was delivered, my mom left. I don’t know where she is, but I know one thing. This world is a better place with my sister in it. She has the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever seen, and she has helped to place dozens of unwanted babies in loving homes. Give me a chance,” he finished his eyes pleading.
Marissa stared at the cowboy not certain what to say. Would he go through with it? Even if he didn’t, it gave her more time to sort the whole thing out. She would have so much less to explain if she could simply tell her students that her husband was working away.
For several long seconds, she sat there staring at Trace, her eyes seeing, but her heart hiding from the fear.
“You’d do this?”
“Yes,” Trace said squeezing her hand and trying to convey the depth of his conviction. “I know it’s crazy, but I don’t care. I just want to help.”
“It is crazy,” Marissa agreed, something in her very essence longing to say yes. “What happens after the baby is born?” she asked.
“Whatever you want,” Trace said. “You can go on your way and leave the child with me, or we can work out something else. By then you’ll have a better idea of what you truly want.”
Marissa found herself nodding at the insane notion. It might work. She wanted a family, she wanted children, why not let this be the start? Perhaps in a few months when the baby was born she would feel more confident about raising it on her own, but for now, this eliminated several of the issues that had worried her.
“I’ll do it,” she said, still reeling from the idea. “If you’re truly willing to marry me and give me a way out of this mess, I’ll do it.”
Trace smiled squeezing her hand gently again. He could see her heart in her eyes and a sense of relief, even joy-filled, his chest as he whispered a silent thanks to heaven.
“Do you need time or do you want to get married soon,” he asked. “I’ll be there when you’re ready.”
“Just take me home, cowboy,” Marissa said feeling suddenly tired and drained. “I’m going home to get a good night’s sleep then I’ll let you know in the morning. I have no idea how I’m going to explain this to Michelle or my parents,” she added almost to herself.
Trace started the truck again and shifted into gear turning out onto the dark road leading toward the ranch. He still didn’t understand what had made him make the proposal to Marissa, but he felt deep down inside it had been the right thing to do. If he ended up a single dad so be it, but he wasn’t going to let this woman down. One way or another he would show her the peace that came with knowing who holds the future.
Perhaps tonight wasn’t the time to bring up the subject of God, but he knew he was one-step closer to sharing that amazing love with Marissa.
Chapter 11
Marissa walked downstairs to the sound of laughter from the kitchen and slowed her step at the sound of Philomena’s voice.
“I’m serious,” Phil said. “We came home to absolute silence, and the minute Marissa and Trace were out the door, Chase and I fell into bed tangled like a wisteria vine and slept like the dead,”
“Glad to hear romance isn’t dead,” Michelle said chuckling past her coffee cup.
“What are you saying?” Phil grumbled. “Being able to sleep in my husband’s arms was very romantic.”
“Good morning,” Marissa said stepping into the kitchen grinning when Phil’s cheeks went red.
“I take it you heard,” Phil said looking down at Megan who was asleep in her baby carrier to cover her embarrassment.
“Maybe just a little,” Marissa said moving to the counter where fruit, yogurt, and a breakfast casserole waited, to fix a plate.
“You sleep well?” Michelle asked. “You look rested this morning.”
Marissa turned leaning against the dark stone counter top and scooping up a bite of creamy yogurt and fruit. “I did sleep well,” she said surprised at the fact as she shoveled the food into her mouth.
“When are you going to come babysit for me again?” Phil asked, brushing her auburn locks from her neck. “Maybe you could bring her over here, and Chase and I could have a date night at home,” she finished hopefully.
Marissa laughed. “I’d be happy to watch Megan again,” she said, “but Trace is the one who got her to go to sleep.”
“Then bring him along,” Phil said her violet eyes pleading. “It felt so good to be out and spend time with Chase with one of us not rocking, feeding, or bouncing a cranky baby.”
“Are you going out with Trace again?” Michelle asked slyly, hiding her smile behind her coffee mug.
Marissa shrugged thoughts of the night before flashing through her brain. Had she truly been considering Trace’s proposal? What would it be like to know that she had a way out if she wanted it? “I don’t know,” she said keeping her voice neutral.
Phil raised a brow at Michelle but didn’t look at Marissa.
Adding more fruit to her bowl Marissa moved to the table and slipped into a chair.
“Go on ask?” she said looking at Phil. She could see the questions dancing in the ranch owner’s eyes.
“You went on a date with Trace?” Phil asked sitting up and propping her elbows on the table. “What made you do it? Do you like him? Will we hear wedding bells soon?”
Marissa rolled her eyes and shook her head. “I had no idea you were such a hopeless romantic,” she drawled. “In the city you were the hard-nosed marketing expert who ate men for breakfast and spat out the bones.”
“What can I say I’m starved for some romance,” Phil said.
“Well be prepared to be disappointed,” Marissa said, placing her bowl on the table and rising to head for the coffee pot. “Trace was just being friendly. I think he has a hero complex or something.”
Phil’s harsh laugh made Marissa turn from the coffee pot with a scowl.
“Believe it or not that is a good thing in a man,” Phil said. “I had no idea when I took over this ranch that they still made men like that. Chase came as quite a surprise to me.”
Marissa smiled taking in Phil’s words. “It is rather surprising,” she agreed.
“Tell me about it,” Michelle added a soft light entering her eyes as she thought of Kade. It had taken all of her courage to walk down the aisle the day she agreed to meet her mate at the altar. She’d met Kade once before but the huge, overly muscled man had been intimidating to her. At five-foot nothing she didn’t know if she could actually stand up to him. Fortunately, she didn’t have to. After a previous bad relationship Kade had been a revelation. He was her gentle giant.
Phil smiled reaching across the table to pat her friend’s hand. “We are so blessed,” she said happily.
Ma
rissa watched her sister and Phil for a few seconds once again struck by the changes they had both gone through after joining the crew of the Broken J. For a moment, she wondered if there was something in the water that made them change so.
Michelle, had grown confident and self sufficient after her marriage to Kade, even sending her controlling ex-boyfriend packing with a flea in his ear when he’d come to demand she come home.
Phil, on the other hand, had softened finding the strength to depend on someone else and trust them with her very heart. She was still a driven businesswoman but she didn’t seem to need to prove anything to people.
Marissa couldn’t help but wonder if she would ever feel that secure. All through college and training, she’d been told that women didn’t need a man to have everything they wanted, but what if one of the things you wanted was to have a partner in life who filled in the gaps when you were tired.