by T L Swan
I frown as my eyes find Adrian. “Adrian is the family stylist.” Natasha laughs. “He’s the only one around here with any taste.”
I smile, my cheeks still ablaze.
“Borrow one of my dresses and then you can pay for the dry cleaning bill.” Natasha smiles with a wink.
I fake a smile in return. “We’ll see,” I murmur.
* * *
Somehow it’s now Thursday and I still haven’t told Cameron about Owen. It’s getting harder and harder every day. Cameron has stayed at my house all week and, although I have had Owen’s door closed, I kind of thought he would catch on at some point. He hasn’t.
Today, Natasha and Adrian picked me up from work. I had the afternoon off and we went to Natasha’s and picked out a dress. It’s weird that I feel so comfortable with the two of them. They sat on the bed while I tried on dress after dress and they worked out what I was going to wear with which shoes and bag. They’re normal. Refreshingly normal.
Then we went out to lunch and we laughed like old friends. It was strange having Max, Natasha’s security guard, with us. Even Adrian has a guard. It turns out Adrian is gay and beautiful, and I can see him and I becoming good friends. And Natasha… well, she is just so lovely and genuine—the kind of girl I would be friends with even if we didn’t know the Stanton boys. I’m still not sure about Joshua. Only time will tell what happens there.
The pressure is amped up, though. Not only have I lied to Cameron, but his family seem to be making such an effort to make me feel welcome, and I really like them, so now I’m effectively lying to them too.
This is a big fucking mess.
* * *
I hold the phone in my hand. I’m working tonight and I haven’t told Cameron yet. He sent me a text asking me to come over because he was making dinner. We’ve spent every night together since we hooked up. I dial his number and he answers on the first ring.
“Hey, Bloss. How did the dress shopping go?” His voice is happy and jovial.
My heart flips in my chest at the sound of his voice. I adore him. “Hi, babe. Tash’s wardrobe shopping was good. We went out for lunch afterwards.”
“It seems you have them wrapped around your finger.”
I giggle.
“Natasha rang me this afternoon and told me not to fuck things up with you.”
My stomach drops. I’m the only one who is going to fuck this up.
“Cam, I can’t come over tonight.”
“Why not?”
“I’m working.”
“What?” He hesitates as he puts the puzzle together. “At the club?” he snaps.
I swallow my nerves. “Yes, I start at ten.”
“No!” He pauses for a moment. “I don’t want you going there at all.”
“Cam.”
“Ashley, I fucking mean it. You do not go there. Call in with your resignation right now.” He snarls.
“Cameron, I need the money.”
“You are not working there. I’m not having my fucking girlfriend working in a brothel.”
My heart somersaults in my chest. “Girlfriend?” I whisper.
“Yes, you are my fucking girlfriend, so get used to it.”
“Cam, listen to me. I can’t just leave.”
“Ashley, so help me fucking God, if you go there tonight we are through.”
“Is that a threat?” I snap.
“That’s a fucking promise.” He growls.
His anger has gone from zero to ten in a second.
“Cameron, you can’t tell me what to do. It’s bar work and nothing else.”
“I don’t want those sleazy men looking at you. You’re mine to look at. Ring in with your resignation.”
My anger bursts. “Need I remind you that you are one of those sleazy men, Cameron? I can’t give up a job for a man who has a membership at the same club. I’m not that stupid,” I yell.
He stays silent for a moment as he thinks.
“Hand in your resignation and I will cancel my membership.”
I close my eyes as tears fill them. Why is he making everything so hard?
I need this job.
“Cameron, I can’t do that,” I whisper. “I need this job. Why don’t you come with me and sit at the bar?”
“I’m not sitting at the fucking bar watching other men drool over you. I will end up killing someone.”
“Cameron...” I beg.
“Resign.” Then he hangs up.
* * *
The rain pours down as I stand at the door and knock. It’s 10.30pm.
Cameron opens the door, his face falls in relief and he takes me into his arms, holding me close. “I resigned,” I whisper. “I’m not going back baby.” I cling to him like my life depends on it.
He kisses me and it’s the most beautiful kiss he has ever gifted me with. My eyes instantly fill with tears.
Tonight Cameron showed me that I have absolutely no control over my emotions with him. The thought of him leaving me was unbearable.
He kisses me again and I melt into his arms.
He’s driving this ship and all I can do is hang on and hope to survive the ride.
17
Ashley
I lie on my side and smile at the beautiful man facing me. We’re naked and in his bed after a couple of rounds of lovemaking.
This is special.
Every moment with him is sacred.
I couldn’t go to work tonight knowing it may cause us to end. I could never purposely end what we have because I know what a gift it is.
His eyes watch me and I smile softly as I run my fingers through his stubble. “What are you thinking about?” I ask.
He swallows and his eyes don’t leave mine. “You,” he eventually answers.
I smile as I push his hair back from his forehead and kiss him gently on the lips. “What about me?”
“That soft fucking thing that you do messes with my head,” he murmurs.
I smile broadly. “That’s called intimate lovemaking, Cam.”
His eyes search mine. “It’s new to me.”
My heart explodes. “It’s new to me, too,” I whisper as my lips brush his.
He holds me tight and the emotion between us is so strong—so strong it feels like love, even though we have only known each other for two minutes.
But what a perfect two minutes they have been.
“I don’t know what I’m doing here,” he whispers.
I frown and push the hair back from his forehead as I watch him battle with some kind of internal struggle.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
He pauses before he answers. “Something is going on with me. I’m acting crazy and demanding that you do things the way I want you to do them.”
“And?”
“And that’s not who I am. I don’t usually give a fuck what girls do.”
I kiss him softly. “Why does it scare you to feel close to someone?”
“Because I don’t have any control.”
“You have a lot more control of us than you think Cameron.”
“I can’t even stand the thought of one night without you,” he whispers as he holds me close.
My eyes tear up. “I can’t, either. Why do you think I resigned tonight? I don’t want this to end.”
He pulls back to look at me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to tell you to leave, but I just can’t handle you working there.”
I blow out a breath and roll onto my back. “It’s okay.” I think for a moment. “To be honest, it’s kind of a relief that you didn’t want me to go back.” I sigh.
He leans up onto his elbow and places his hand over my stomach. “What do you mean?”
I run my hand up over his shoulder and up the back of his neck. “If you didn’t mind me working there then you it would mean you don’t really care.”
His eyes hold mine as his brain catches up with my thoughts. “I’m probably going to fuck this up between us, you know…” he whispers.
“Will you stop being such a chicken?” I smirk.
He watches me for a moment and eventually he smiles. “You’re right. You’ll probably fuck this up way before I do.”
Oh man, if only he knew how true that statement is. I giggle as he rolls on top of me.
“I’ve got an idea.” I smile against his lips.
“What’s that?” he asks as his mouth drops to my neck.
“How about you show me that animal fucking thing that you do so well.”
His eyes widen in delight and he slides his hard cock up my stomach. “That is a good idea, Tucker.”
I laugh and he slides into me with a sharp snap.
“Legs up.” He growls.
I laugh as I wrap my legs around his waist and he withdraws before he slides home deep. My eyes close from the pleasure.
“This is much better than pouring drinks, right?” he whispers as he pumps me hard.
I giggle as I clench and he moans in pleasure.
“Fuck, yeah,” he whispers up against my ear.
“You need to fuck me, Cameron Stanton. Really hard. Right now.”
He laughs and lifts his body off mine and with straightened arms, he does as he’s told.
* * *
It’s Friday night and we’re boarding the Stanton private jet bound for San Francisco for Natasha’s charity ball tomorrow night. I feel like we are in some Mission Impossible spy film. There’s people everywhere and the children are boarding the plane first with Natasha and Joshua. There are the five children, two nannies, three guards who are apparently the children’s guards. Adrian, Cam and me, and a man I haven’t met before called Jarvis. Then there are another six security guards, Max, and the other man I met the other night. The children are all playing quietly on their iPads and I watch on in wonder. They’re so accustomed to flying that they don’t even flinch and are paying absolutely no attention to their exciting surroundings.
“Do the kids always come?” I ask Cameron as I watch them all get onto the plane.
“Yes, always. They would never leave them in another city.”
“Oh.” I frown, distracted.
“Do they always have the nannies?” I ask. They seemed so normal the other night. I would never have imagined all this carry on.
“They are employed, but they only come away on things like this. Tash doesn’t like to have people in the house, but sometimes they’re needed.”
I frown at him. “Would you have a nanny for your children?”
He shrugs. “Depends.”
“On what?”
“On whether their mother worked or not.”
“Hmm,” I mutter distracted.
“I was brought up with nannies,” he replies.
My eyes widen. This is news. “Really?”
He nods and picks up my hand to kiss the back of it. “My father travelled a lot and my mother… well, she was always distracted.”
“Oh.
So… you come from this kind of money, too?” I ask.
He shrugs. “Not this much, no. But yes, I come from money. You knew that.”
I nod as another piece of the Cameron puzzle fits into place.
“You will meet my parent’s tomorrow night, actually.” He smiles.
“Really?” I feel a nervous flutter in my stomach at the thought.
He smiles, puts his arm around me and kisses my forehead. “Yes, really.”
I wrap my jacket around my shoulders as I curl into him. I just want my Owen home. I’m missing him so much with these kids around. These last few days have been horrendous without him. Three days to go.
The guards move to the side and we are ushered onto the plane boarding from the back. We take a seat in the middle. The children, Natasha and Joshua sit at the front, and the children’s chairs are already laid back with blankets over them as they play their games quietly.
This is another world. “Tell me about this charity?” I whisper.
“Natasha and Nicholas run a charity for mental health.”
“Oh.” I think for a moment. “Who is Nicholas?”
“He’s one of our friends.”
“They have raised over thirty-million dollars to date.”
“Wow, that’s amazing.” I smile. “Impressive.”
“Tash works really hard on it. This is her thing.”
“What does she have to do with mental health?” I ask.
“She’s a psychologist.”
My eyes widen. “You didn’t tell me that?”
Cameron shrugs. “You didn’t ask.”
“Where does she work?”
“She has her own private practice near their home.”
“In LA, where we were the other night?”
“No, near Willowvale, their property. They live there most of the time. LA is just, like, their holiday house. They only live there a few days a week and even less now that the children are at school.”
“What?” I whisper. “Are you kidding me?” That mansion is a frigging holiday house.
“Joshua works out of LA one day a week and then the other days from home. Adrian is his CEO.”
What the hell? “So Adrian runs the company?” I frown.
“Pretty much.”
I shake my head in disbelief. Jeez, this is full on. I knew Adrian seemed intelligent, but a CEO of a billion-dollar company… I had no idea. Natasha is a psychologist and Joshua a pioneer app developer. Cameron’s a doctor. I wonder what Jarvis does? The plane takes flight into the sky as my mind tries to catch up on the dynamics of the of the Stanton clan.
Well educated and beautiful.
This money runs deep.
* * *
The sun peeks through the blinds we didn’t shut properly last night. We’re in the Four Seasons on the top floor. I would call it the Stanton floor because the whole floor was booked just for us for security reasons.
I can’t believe how the other half live. And what seems unbelievable is that they are really, really nice people. We had dinner last night in Natasha and Joshua’s suite after the kids went to bed with Adrian, Nicholas, and Jarvis. We drank expensive wine and laughed. I haven’t had so much fun in a long time. The conversation is natural, intelligent, and funny, and I feel like I’ve finally found my people… just as I’m on the precipice of fucking it up.
Cameron is sleeping and I sit up and watch him for a moment. What a beautiful man he is. He’s different to his brother. I can tell by the way he is with Adrian and the others, he seems more in tune, but then I suppose that’s a doctor thing. It’s his job to be in tune with people.
And he is so in tune with me.
I’ve never had this. I’ve never had a man who dotes on me—and he does. My wish is his command. I know it’s not his normal behavior by the way the others are all shocked at how he treats me. We got back here late last night and had a hot bath together. We drank tea and I can feel myself slipping deeper and deeper into his abyss. Unfortunately, now I know what kind of a loss I really face. I’ve never had this happiness, never even dreamed of it. I didn’t know it existed, to be honest. I get up and go to the bathroom, and when I come back and open the blinds just a little, I peer out at the street below. It’s early morning and a truck is unloading across the street as the sun comes up. I watch the workers unload presumably their first job of the day. On the surface, I’m so happy and ecstatic, yet underneath my nerves are simmering in a boiling pot.
I miss Owen.
Owen is my priority. I have to do what’s best for him and if Cameron doesn’t accept him then I will walk away… and I will die a little inside because I know how happy we could have been. Of course, I know that I probably won’t have to walk away because Cameron will walk away from me. Pain slices through me at the thought. How could I go on knowing what it feels like to be with ‘the one’ and then not have him in my life? I close my eyes as the horror sinks in.
“Morning, my beautiful Bloss,” his sleepy voice murmurs.
I turn and see Cam lying o
n his side facing me, and I immediately go and sit beside him and kiss him softly. “You sure know how to make a girl’s day with a morning greeting like that?” I smile. I run my fingers through his messy curls and try to tame them. “You have just-fucked hair.” I smirk.
“Hmm,” he murmurs. “That’s because I am in a constant state of just fucked with you.”
I giggle and lie down next to him. He wraps me in his arms and inhales deeply with happiness and contentment.
“Thank you for introducing me to your family. It means a lot.”
He smiles sleepily as he grabs my behind.
“What’s on today?” I ask.
He frowns. “I don’t know, whatever you want. Tash and Adrian will be organizing stuff for tonight and Joshua will be with the kids, so we can do anything.”
“What will Natasha be doing?” I ask.
He shrugs. “Venue shit, I don’t know.”
“I should help her.”
He groans with his eyes closed.
“Yeah, I want to help them. Can you ring her and find out what I can do?”
“No, babe. Stay with me today.”
I sit up. “No, you hang with Joshua. I want to help.” I get up and get Cameron’s phone and scroll through. I dial Natasha’s number.
“Hey, Cam,” she answers chirpily.
“Oh, hi Natasha. It’s Ash.”
“Oh, hey Ash.”
“I was wondering if I could help you today.”
“Oh, that’s so nice of you, but not necessary. It’s a shitty job. We just set tables and crap.”
“No, honestly. I would love to help.”
“Really?” She thinks for a moment. “Okay, fantastic. We can pick you up in hour.”
“Great, see you then.” I hang up and smile.
“Are you really ditching me today?” Cameron frowns.
I smile as I get up and flick the kettle on. “Sure looks like it.”
* * *
Natasha, Adrian and I sit on the floor at the back of the ballroom. Natasha has her shoes off and we’re each having a much-deserved soft drink. It’s four in the afternoon, and we have worked our asses off all day long. The stupid coordinator called in sick and then the girl who took her place knew nothing, so we ended up doing the lot. We set one hundred tables, each with ten places. Full cutlery, full table arrangements… you name it, we did it. Adrian had about five meltdowns at the incompetent staff missing butter knives and cutlery. The table flower arrangements were nothing like what Natasha ordered, so her and I did them all again. We both have about a thousand rose thorn pricks on our fingers and have established that we can swear like sailors when forced to.