“Oh?”
Our joined hands held my attention as I fought to find the right words. None existed. “Thomas, I’m not going to be able to see you for a while.”
As soon as I looked at him, his mouth fell open. Each time he tried to speak, no words came out. When he finally gave up, he lowered his gaze to our hands. I expected him to pull away, but he rubbed his thumb over mine.
“Is this because of our conversation the other night at the bar?”
“No, Thomas. I accept that you want to take things slow. This is because of school. My classes were adjusted and I’ll be focusing on more, uh, specific classes right now. It’s going to eat up the majority of my time.”
It wasn’t a complete lie. Now that Rayna had changed my schedule, school would take up a good portion of my time, even though I had fewer classes. I’d stretched myself thin enough as it was.
What I couldn’t tell him was that this might be the last time he ever saw me. Classes or not, if Draven and I were caught using a spell to bind our magic, I would lose my position as Peacekeeper and my all-access pass to the human realm.
“I know that your classes and my work schedule clash a lot, but what if I made myself more available?” His eyes filled with hope as he pulled me closer. “Would that open up more time for us?”
Any other time I would have been elated that he was trying to find a way for us to still see each other. But now things had changed. I couldn’t think of myself anymore.
We’d never know what it felt like to be in each other’s arms, bodies pressed together as we made love. Even if I didn’t get busted for the spell I planned to do with Draven, it would be a long time before I could change the council’s mind or any rules of the Pararealm. Humans were still forbidden until then. I couldn’t string him along and give him false hope any more than I could continue to put the Pararealm in danger.
“Thomas, you can’t change your work schedule.”
“Yes, I can. I’ve been offered a position with another company, and my schedule will be more flexible. I’ll have more time to see you.”
He was saying the things I’d waited to hear for the last few months. This was what I’d always wanted—more time with him. Refusing it would not be easy.
Still, every time I pursed my lips to tell him we were breaking up, my throat constricted. It would be easier to tell him I was a witch and other worlds existed besides his. The thought of saying goodbye broke my heart.
Just because I hadn’t known him as long as Zander or Draven didn’t mean I loved him any less. I loved him with the same intensity as the other two men in my life.
“Even if your schedule is more flexible, mine isn’t.” I hated myself for doing this. The anger became too much as I stood, putting distance between us. As soon as I reached the window, I focused on the backyard, not wanting him to see the tears in my eyes. “I want to say I can make it work, but I’m not sure if I can.”
“Why do I get the feeling you’re breaking up with me?”
My breath caught as pain radiated through every inch of me. The raspy sound of his voice stung my heart. So did the hurt in his eyes when I glanced at him.
“I never said that.” The words escaped with little thought. I wanted to ease his pain as much as mine.
Maybe I could make this breakup easier for him. Inside my Book of Shadows was a spell for wiping someone’s memory. He would be better off if he could forget we ever met. Then he’d be free to find a human girlfriend who could dote on him the way I never could.
It wouldn’t ease the ache inside of me, but I couldn’t be selfish about this. I had to do what was right for Thomas as well as the Pararealm.
His forehead creased as he scanned my face. “Are you sure we’re not breaking up? It sure as hell feels like you’re pulling away.”
Thomas’s question hung between us as we stared at one another. It would be best to leave him thinking things were okay. As soon as I returned to my room, I’d perform the spell and clear every memory he had of me.
When I nodded at him this time, he stood and joined me near the window. The moment he stopped in front of me, he leaned closer and lifted my chin. His lips pressed to mine in a tender kiss, one I knew he would end soon. He never let his emotions get carried away like I did.
Yet the second his tongue slipped inside my mouth and swirled with mine, I sensed a change in him. He fisted a handful of my hair and covered my mouth with his. A moan vibrated my lips before he eased back to look in my eyes.
“You mean more to me than you realize, Samara.” He kissed my cheek and nose softly. “I’m crazy about you, and I’ll do anything to keep you in my life.”
When he leaned back in, I waited for him to kiss me again. Instead, his lips went to my neck. He slid them over my skin, nipping tiny sections as he did. Then he pressed me against the wall.
I rocked my hips forward, against the bulge in his sweats. It was like an electric current was coursing through me, zinging through my body. Thomas’s mouth moved faster, and his bites became harder. His hands worked down my sides, causing my skin to tingle.
The second he grabbed my ass, I moaned into his mouth. This wasn’t like Thomas. Maybe he was afraid that if he didn’t take our relationship to the next level, I’d end things. Maybe he was finally ready. Or perhaps this was fate giving me a bittersweet goodbye.
Whatever the reason, I wasn’t about to pull away or tell him to stop. I wanted this moment—craved it. No way was I going to refuse him, even if I was running out of time.
I shoved his sweats down, letting them fall to the ground. He lifted his shirt from his waist and yanked it off. My shirt hit the ground, along with every article of clothing we wore. When nothing but skin remained between us, I drew his face back to mine.
Our lips met again, but there was no tenderness to our kiss this time. It was rough, urgent, and full of need. All the tension that had built between us over the last six months exploded into a passion-fueled frenzy.
As soon as Thomas’s hands gripped my ass this time, he lifted me. My back slid up the wall as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Breaking the kiss, he pulled back and cradled my face.
“I love you, Samara.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck and whispered five of the most honest words I’d ever uttered. “I love you too, Thomas.”
As we stared into each other’s eyes, all the love I felt for him spilled from my heart. Those big brown eyes devoured me, just like his mouth did. After sharing this intimate moment with him, I was convinced more than ever of what I had to do.
I couldn’t end things with Thomas any more than I could end them with Draven or Zander. He was mine, heart and soul. Despite what oppositions we faced, I had to find a way for us to be together. Losing him now wasn’t an option.
9
I closed the door to my room and spoke the words to turn on the lamp by my bed. Movement on my balcony caught my attention. On instinct I flung my hand out, sending magic sparking toward the intruder. Their hand lifted, reflecting my magic back at me.
I grunted as my body absorbed the energy. Luckily, the stabbing pain that followed only lasted for a moment. Ready to release another blast, my hands flew up as the intruder stepped into my room.
When I realized it was only Jax, a relieved breath escaped my lips. That relief evaporated when he stormed toward me. He grabbed my arm with one hand, his other hovered over my tattoo. Crap. Of all the guardians to find me, it had to be Jax.
His gaze shot to me. His anger was so intense that it filled the room. “What have you done?”
I glanced toward the door, worried the other witches in the dorm would hear him. “It’s not what you think.”
“Oh. It’s exactly what I think. You spelled your tattoo so we wouldn’t know you’d left the realm. If it wasn’t for me sensing the magic through the bond, you would never have been caught. You obviously didn’t think about the fact that being part mage, I would be alerted.”
I had thought of that.
It was supposed to be part of the spell. Was it his dark magic that had broken through? That was a power even I couldn’t match.
“I wasn’t gone long,” I said. “I went to break up with Thomas.”
He released my arm and flung his hands in the air. “So you risked your position at the academy and with your coven for your human boyfriend? Did it even cross your mind to have one of us escort you?”
“Would you have taken me?”
“Knowing you would sneak out anyway, yes, I would have.” He dropped his head and massaged the back of his neck. “So now that you’ve broken up with him, does that mean you will put and focus on your studies?”
I crossed to the window, not wanting to see the disapproval on his face when I told him the truth. “Um. Well, not exactly.”
His growl filled the room. That sound alone would have anyone else quivering in fear. If I was smart, I would be afraid. Pushing Jax when he was this upset was not a good idea.
“What does that mean?” he asked.
“I went there with every intention of breaking up with him, but I couldn’t do it.” I spun toward Jax, my hands clutched in front of me. “I love him.”
“If you love him, then you should have broken up with him. Samara, the council gave you your final warning. If they take your powers, what happens to Zander and Draven? Are you willing to sacrifice them?”
His words were like a punch to my chest. I’d always thought I’d find a way to make it work. Now more than ever, I needed to convince the grand council that we should be allowed to date humans. I didn’t want to have to choose between them. It wasn’t fair.
“I have no idea what I’m going to do. I got myself into this mess, I’ll figure a way out.”
“That’s what worries me. What lengths will you go to?”
I never should have spelled my tattoo. What if something had gone wrong while I was gone? They never would have known I needed them or where to find me.
“I’m sorry that I snuck off. After you found me at the bar with him, I really didn’t think you would support me seeing him again.”
“You should have asked first. You don’t think we know about sacrifices? We dedicate our lives to guarding you until the power given to you by the ancestors gets transferred to the next in line. Only then are we free to do what we want.”
“If you hate your job so much, why don’t you quit?” Regret filled me once the words left my mouth. There was no taking them back. I loved each of my guardians equally, no matter how much they annoyed me.
Jabbing his finger in my direction, he took a few steps forward. “We were assigned to you for a reason. Now I’m beginning to doubt we were the right choice. We should never have become emotionally involved with you. Our love for you caused us to be too lenient and you’ve taken advantage. Do you think having another team of guardians assigned to you would be any better?”
“That’s not what I meant. I...”
He cut me off, not letting me continue. “You expressed to us your concern over your missing friends, yet you run around unprotected as if nothing is wrong. So, which is it? Do you believe something happened to them at the academy, or do you believe they were careless like you and caught by humans?”
Was that a dig at me? Did he blame me for their disappearance?
“That’s not fair,” I snapped. “I had nothing to do with that. I even have proof they didn’t leave campus. Their trail ends at the restricted staff wing.”
Jax closed his eyes as he inhaled through his nose, then released the air through his mouth. My skin prickled as my power stirred inside me, warning me that Jax’s black magic was surfacing. I knew he would never intentionally hurt me, but if the darkness inside him took over, he would lose control.
Focusing on me again, Jax said, “The council warned you to let it be. Yet, again, you disobeyed.”
“I wasn’t alone. I had Draven and Zander with me.” Judging by the way he clenched his jaw and the inferno of power swirling inside me, that had been the wrong thing to say.
Jax drove his fingers through his hair and began to pace the room. “So now you’ve dragged Draven and Zander into your deception? Draven’s mother is the high priestess. Do you know how that would look for her if he were caught helping you? Not to mention Zander. That could jeopardize relations with the wolves.”
“Everything is fine. We didn’t get caught.”
He spun on me, and the fire in his gaze had me holding my breath. “Everything is not fine, Samara. You continue to take unnecessary risks. We told you we would search for your friends and we’ve been doing that. Even when it’s left you with only one of us guarding you. The council also asked you to stand down. What if your interference has caused more harm than good? How can we focus on finding the missing witches if we have to babysit you?”
Against every warning burning inside me, I said, “Wait. Babysit? I’m a grown woman. I’m tired of being told when to sleep, what classes to take, who I can and can’t date, and where I can and can’t go. I’m a person, not a trained pet. Just because you’ve spent your life celibate, doesn’t mean I have to.”
He jabbed his finger in his chest. “You don’t think I want love? That I don’t want to have a family? I gave up that right when I swore an oath to protect you!”
“I didn’t ask you to do that,” I whispered. I never gave much thought to what their duty to me involved. I always teased them about lightening up and needing to get laid. But he was right—how could they have a serious relationship when they were devoted to protecting me?
“No, you didn’t ask,” he said. “But when you made the choice to step into the sacred pool, you took on the duty of your coven and the realm. You are bound to put that above all else. Maybe the ancestors got it wrong this time. Maybe you aren’t strong enough to handle the responsibility.”
“What the hell, Jax! I have done everything to advance my abilities. I’m miles ahead of everyone at this academy, including the teachers. They say that I need to take on more courses. Bring it, because half of the classes I could teach.” At that moment, the niggling question that had always been at the back of my mind surfaced. “Did you ever wonder why I’ve been held back? I always thought it was Melynn plotting against me, but now I’m not so sure.”
“Samara, you need to stop! This is getting out of control. You know the consequences for speaking against the council.”
“I thought you were on my side. I guess I was wrong. You’re a puppet just like the rest of them.”
His hands fisted at his sides, his chest rising and falling with heaving breaths. His eyes shifted from emerald to pools of black. I’d pushed him too far and his dark magic had surfaced. Real fear settled into my bones.
“Jax?”
When he didn’t respond and just continued to stare at me with those dead eyes, I yanked the door open and hurried from the room.
I raced down the hall, trying to put as much distance between us as I could. Not that it mattered—he had wings.
I said a silent prayer he wouldn’t follow me. I had no idea what Jax would do while under the influence of dark magic. Under normal circumstances, he would never harm me. Only nothing about this was normal.
Once I rounded the corner, my phone chimed with a text message. I pulled it from my pocket and swiped the screen. Tears filled my eyes when I saw Rose’s name.
I screwed up. I can’t come back to campus. Can you meet me at the spot in the woods where we searched for the mugwort?
I breathed a sigh of relief. She was safe. But what was she doing in the human realm? Had she been there this whole time? My hands trembled as I texted her back.
I’m on my way. I’ve been so worried about you.
10
Every nerve inside my body pulsed in the same rapid rhythm of my heart. After my fight with Jax, going back to the human realm was the last thing I should do. But at this point, I had no other choice. If Rose couldn’t come to me, I’d have to go to her.
I had no idea why she
’d be in the human realm or how she’d managed to get through the veil. Zander had never picked up on her trail when we’d searched the perimeter before. The only lead we had was in the restricted wing of the main building. Had someone helped her cross over? Why wouldn’t she have asked me to take her?
Regardless of what happened, her text made it obvious that she was in trouble. I just prayed she hadn’t done something that would get her banished. After waiting and worrying over the last few days, I had no intention of leaving this up to the council to fix. She had come to me for help, not the council. Besides, I still didn’t know for sure if they were involved. I’d lost my faith in them months ago. Now, they’d lost my trust.
The heated words exchanged with Jax still tumbled through my mind. Our fight left me shaken, and my anger still hadn’t settled, nor had the power inside me. How had our argument even gotten to that point? Once we both had time to cool down, we would need to discuss what happened.
I should have known better than to test him. When it came to my safety, he was extremely protective. That spike in his emotions caused his dark magic to surface. I didn’t like that side of him and was grateful he didn’t show it often. He always kept it under control. This time was a different story. Tonight, he’d frightened me.
Pushing the thoughts aside, I glanced over my shoulder to make sure Jax hadn’t followed me. Thankfully, he hadn’t. At this time of night, most of the students were asleep. Anyone awake was on the other side of the school in lunar magic and shadow walking classes.
It was now or never. All I had to do was get to the edge of the estate, cast a portal to the woods in the human realm, and get Rose back to safety. We’d figure out everything else afterward. Hopefully, she was with Natasha.
I turned to run around the building, but I smacked into something firm. It felt like I’d hit a stone wall. The instant I rubbed my head and backed away, panic set in. Violet eyes peered into mine.
Paranormal Academy Page 90