by Kat Mizera
“You look tired,” he said.
“I am, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep. I’m pretty anxious about the whole thing.”
“I don’t know if you’re going to like it, but I had a thought.”
“Shoot.”
“Somehow, I got on the mailing list of one of those really nice cruise lines that does river cruises, CMA Waterways. They have a cruise leaving Amsterdam Sunday that stops in Cologne Monday. My friend, the king of Limaj, is friends with the owner of CMA. He called him and if we want to meet the boat on Monday, there’s a room waiting for us.”
“But that’s three days from now.” I stared at him. “I can’t just get on a cruise the first day of finals.”
“What better way to get out of town? Chains is already in the air, flying to Germany to take over reconnaissance here in Cologne. He used to be with MI6 so he’ll be able to handle it and I trust him.”
“I can’t leave before Wednesday,” I repeated, because I couldn’t think of anything else to say.
“Shannon, my priority is protecting you. Since we can’t figure out who this is, what they want or what’s going on, the safest thing for you is to leave town and let my people handle it. Being on a cruise like that, where no one knows where you are, is perfect. We’ll avoid social media and just disappear for six days. We’ll disembark on Saturday in Basel, Switzerland. From there, we can come back here or I can put you on a plane to the U.S. or whatever you want.”
“But I have a job!” I was struggling to wrap my head around this, but the idea of being on a cruise ship with him was intriguing.
“Is your job going to keep you safe?” he asked softly, stopping to look into my eyes.
“No, but when this is over, I want to still have one.”
“We’ll work it out, I promise. Just say yes.”
“But… I have to call my boss.”
“We can tell her there’s been a credible threat to your life because of your father’s hand in politics before his death, and that your mother hired a private security firm to find out who it is. Chains, the guy I keep talking about, will back up our story and I’ll have him talk to her if you need it. You can spend the weekend finishing up your final exams and getting whatever papers you have graded. Then you’ll go in Monday morning, tell her what’s going on, and we can be on the boat by afternoon. Erik said they’re not leaving Cologne until later in the day, so you can work Monday morning.”
“Ace, this is crazy.”
“Maybe, but it’s already arranged and I think it would give Chains and his team the best chance to catch this person without endangering you.”
“But what if they don’t?” I hated to sound like a terrified little kid, but the more he talked about private security firms and a team of people trying to find my stalker, the more nervous I got.
“Honey, I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Which is why I need you to trust me and say you’ll do this.”
We hashed out details the rest of the way home, stopping to order some takeout since neither of us had had lunch. I didn’t know how we could go on a freakin’ cruise in the middle of all this, not to mention how it’d affect my job and a dozen other details. I didn’t like it and wanted to refuse, but I might never get another chance to go away with him. The truth was that I wasn’t afraid when I was with Ace, and while I hated letting my kids down, I couldn’t fathom saying no. No matter how much I wanted this to be nothing and for it all to go away, I was in danger and Ace was probably the only reason I was still safe.
By the time we got home I’d pretty much talked myself into it. I was about to tell him so when I walked into my apartment and froze. Everything was back where it belonged, the floor had been vacuumed and mopped, and there were fresh flowers on the coffee table. The broken wine bottle was gone, of course, and one of my plants was missing, probably because it had been destroyed, but anyone visiting for the first time wouldn’t even know there had been a problem.
“How did you do this in such a short time?” I whispered, turning to him.
“Your landlady is very sweet and money is a huge incentive when getting things done.”
“I should pay you,” I said automatically, reaching for my purse.
He stilled my hands. “Honey, I have plenty of money.” He paused. “You know who my father is, don’t you?”
I frowned. “Your father? No... Should I?”
He laughed. “Well, I’m sure you know who he is, you just didn’t realize he was my father.”
“Who is it?” I was curious as I kicked off my shoes and put our food on the kitchen table.
“Andy Ross, the lead singer for Poison Tyrants.”
“The 80s hair band?” I chuckled. “How did I not know this?”
“I don’t know, but not only do I have a trust fund, I’ve been making a lot of money the last twelve years or so, with almost no expenses because I don’t even own a car. Eighty percent of my salary goes into savings.”
I wrinkled my nose. “You don’t have a…car? A home? Not even an efficiency apartment or something?”
“Nope. I have a storage space in Los Angeles, where my dad and stepmom live, where I keep my Harley. I drive it like twice a year. I have some furniture and a handful of mementos, but that’s it. When I’m traveling for the agency, it’s all on their dime. When I’m in the U.S., I stay with a handful of friends. I have good friends in L.A. and Vegas, as well as Monte Carlo and Limaj. Those are the four places I go when I’m not working.”
“Well, now you have a place to stay in Cologne as well,” I said, turning to get a couple of plates and utensils.
He came up behind me and slid his arms around my waist. “I’m really looking forward to coming for a visit that has nothing to do with stalkers.”
“Me too.” I turned to him and playfully handed him the plates.
We dug into our food and I looked up when I’d slowed down. “Are we really going on some fancy river cruise while your friends handle my stalker?”
“If you want to. It’s a small room, that’s all they had available, but it has two twin beds, so you don’t have to worry about me taking advantage of you.”
“That’s pretty far down on the list of things I’m worried about,” I told him.
He blew out a breath. “You’re making it tough to stay gentlemanly.”
“Whose idea is that?” I asked, taking a bite of food. “Certainly not mine.”
“Honey, I don’t want to start something I may not be able to finish.”
“That seems to be a common theme with you. I’m not a twenty-one-year-old virgin anymore, Ace. I’m a grown woman perfectly capable of making adult decisions like whether or not I want to have sex with a man I like.”
He smiled at me. “I have to focus on keeping you safe, and getting you naked would be a huge distraction. Once this stalker thing is over, though, you can distract me all you want.”
“Promises, promises.” I wasn’t sure what else to say, so I focused on cleaning up. I didn’t want to wait until this was over to get naked and I’d have to find a way to convince him of that.
Chapter Thirteen
Ace
After lunch I thought Shannon would take a nap, but she came up with half a dozen things she needed to do to get ready to be away for a week, and by the time she’d done all of them, it was dinnertime. She was dragging, though, and by six thirty she’d fallen asleep on the couch, her head on my lap as we watched something on TV. As much as I wanted to sleep beside her, this was safer for both of us. Making love to her was a fantasy, and while I wasn’t nervous per se, I was oddly reluctant.
There was something special about her, and this crazy thing between us, and it was starting to blur the line between personal, professional, and emotional. All three of those things applied to this situation, but I had to remember I was a spy. My life took me on dangerous missions all over the world. I’d come close to dying more times than I could count and that wasn’t what I wanted for her. Even
if she said she was okay with it, sitting home, waiting and wondering when and if I was coming back to her was no kind of life for anyone, especially not Shannon. Adding kids to the equation made it even worse.
It was kind of crazy to even be thinking about things like kids, especially with where I was in life, but Shannon would be the woman I would make those kinds of sacrifices for if the timing was right. Hell, I already had a foot out the door with the agency, so maybe this was the kick in the ass I needed. I just didn’t know for sure if I was ready to walk away from the only thing I’d ever done. Could I give it up for a woman? A family? Every minute I spent with her made me think so, but what if I was wrong? What if I wasn’t the kind of guy who settled down and I fucked it up for both of us?
“We should go into the bedroom,” she murmured sleepily. “It’s a lot more comfortable.”
“You go ahead,” I said gently.
“Stop being stubborn. I promise I won’t jump your bones and distract you from guarding me.” She slowly got to her feet and held out her hands to me.
Oh, hell, there was no way I could say no to an invitation like this. Sex or no sex, sleeping beside Shannon was going to happen.
I’d never seen anyone work as hard as Shannon worked on Saturday. She graded paper after paper after paper, until I had to pry the red pen from her fingers to make her eat and sleep. She graded everything, submitted her final exam documents to whomever had to print them for her, and created letters with detailed instructions for each exam. She was dedicated and efficient, far more concerned with her students’ success than her safety, though I had a feeling she was more nervous about the stalker situation than she let on.
Much to my surprise, we’d kept things platonic. With the way things had gone the other night at the Christmas market, I’d been wondering if she would make some kind of first move, but after our talk Friday afternoon, she seemed content to let me take the lead. We had such a strong bond, it left us battling conflicting emotions. The need to be together was at war with both her safety and the uncertainty of my future, things that were important in the long run.
At the same time, we’d already been apart for a decade. There had never actually been anything between us, but neither of us could deny we wanted there to be. If I could figure out why she had a stalker and what to do about it, I’d take a little time to explore what was in my heart when it came to her. And us. The one thing I’d discovered about myself as I’d gotten older was that it didn’t take me long to know what I did and didn’t want. I didn’t want to keep working for the CIA. I loved working for the royal family in Limaj. I was ready for something less dangerous and more permanent, and if I was ever going to get into a serious relationship, Shannon would be my first choice.
I didn’t need traditional courting rituals, like months and months of dating, to tell me what my heart already knew. The question was more about timing, safety, and whether or not she could live with a nomad like me. Even if I left the agency, I wouldn’t be happy in suburbia. If I was honest with myself, I had no idea what I wanted when my days as a spy were over. Less dangerous, absolutely. Completely safe and sedentary? Fuck no. And until I figured that out, it wasn’t fair to make Shannon part of the equation.
I spent all day Sunday with Chains at his hotel room. He’d gotten to town the day before but spent the time settling in and getting some rest. I left Shannon Sunday morning, sneaking out the back gate after assuring myself no one could get into her apartment short of blowing up her front door. We had the surveillance camera on so I could watch her while I was gone, and she promised she wouldn’t go anywhere or answer the door to anyone at all. She was still drowning in work and I wanted to get Chains up to speed. He’d brought along a new guy from his company that I didn’t know, a guy who went by the nickname Band-Aid. If Chains trusted him, that was good enough for me.
Darryl “Chains” Carruthers was tall and blond, with a distinct British accent and a lot of tattoos. He’d had dreadlocks when I’d first met him, but now he kept his hair cropped close to his head. He’d been badass back in the day, but he was happily married and settled down in Vegas now. I often wondered if he missed the spy game, and figured this was a good chance to ask him.
“You have something on your mind, mate?” Chains asked me as I checked on Shannon for what felt like the hundredth time.
I paused, trying to formulate questions without sounding as unsure of myself as I felt. “I guess I wonder how you like your life now. Does it get boring?”
He laughed. “We manage a fucking sex club—does that sound like my life is ever boring?”
I chuckled. “Well, no, but I mean…men like us, we have special skills, and you have to get off on the rush you get from the danger. Without the danger, how do you survive?”
He scratched his chin. “It’s about the choices you make. Emilie isn’t just my wife—she’s my other half. Our life is fantastic. Busy and exciting and sometimes overwhelming, but every day when I wake up, I thank my blessings that it’s her I’m sharing it with. The key is to find the person who complements you. At least it was for me. Em is tough as hell, but also maternal and smart and has a sassy side that gets me hard just thinking about it. That’s the kind of woman who makes up for the loss of adrenaline rush.” He paused. “But the truth? It never goes away completely. That’s why when she started managing the club, I took over as head of security. I get to bust a few heads now and then, and when Joe put Westfield Security up for sale, I bought it from him because I do get off on the rush. I enjoy the occasional jaunt into this world, and Em understands that. Westfield & Carruthers helps people, while also giving me the occasional excuse to use my skills, and that’s enough for me. I’m not twenty-five anymore, you know? And kids…well, that changes everything.”
I considered what he’d said. “But did you know that going in?”
“No, but I knew not having her in my life would be unacceptable. That was all the convincing I needed. She was the one who told me to buy Westfield—because she knows me better than I know myself.”
“Important trait in a mate.”
He met my gaze curiously. “This is about Shannon?”
“Yeah.” I wasn’t going to lie. Chains had been through this, so he understood better than I’d been expecting.
“And this started from one date a decade ago?”
“Yup. One evening of drinking and dancing, and one kiss that ruined me for all other women.” I shook my head. “And believe me when I say I know how ridiculous that sounds.”
Chains smiled. “Mate, when I met Em, she was getting ready to turn herself into the police for a crime she didn’t even commit. That girl turned my head inside out within minutes, so I knew she was the one for me within a couple of days. It doesn’t sound ridiculous to me at all.”
“So, uh, you think starting something with her is, uh, a good idea?” Why did I feel so uncomfortable talking about this?
“Looks to me like you already have.”
He had no idea how right he was.
Chapter Fourteen
Shannon
The CMA Primadonna was a big beautiful boat. As Ace and I approached the dock, I was momentarily mesmerized by it. It wasn’t the size of a cruise ship, not even close, but it was long and elegant, with several levels, lots of windows and an upper deck that was probably amazing in the summer. Two men rushed forward to greet us and take our suitcases, and as we walked across the short gangway onto the deck, sliding glass doors opened into a beautifully decorated reception area.
There was a huge Christmas tree on the left, a stairway on the right, and another set of sliding glass doors on the other side of the boat. We were immediately welcomed, shown around, and given our room keys, which doubled as access to getting on and off the boat.
We were pretending to be a couple on the cruise, which was fine with me, because every time he held my hand or put his arm around me, my skin literally tingled from his touch. Plus, we’d already expressed interest in each other s
o it didn’t feel like we were pretending. Everything was so damn easy for us, I wondered if it was like this for all couples. Probably not, because it definitely hadn’t been this way when I met Douglas.
“This is beautiful,” I told Ace under my breath as we took the stairs down to our room.
“Are you glad you came?”
“I guess we’ll find out in the next day or so.”
We unpacked a few things in our room and I looked at the two twin beds curiously.
“Aren’t we registered as a couple?” I asked him.
“Erik told me it’s a European thing. There was no option available with one bed. The deluxe suites are all booked.”
“Boo.” I stuck my tongue out and he laughed.
“We can push them together if you get frisky.”
“If?”
“You planning to attack me when we turn out the lights?”
“I might.” I loved pretending I was confident about my abilities to seduce him. It was the furthest thing from the truth, but fun nonetheless.
“I’m looking forward to it.” He grabbed me and lightly kissed me. “But we should take a walk around, learn where everything is. The spy in me can’t help myself. I need to have an escape route planned if necessary.”
“Okay, but I’m thinking the main escape route is jumping in the water. Luckily, the shore isn’t very far.”
“True, but it’s probably cold as fuck this time of year.”
We wandered back upstairs and found ourselves in what was called the lounge. It was a large room, with windows on both sides, filled with couches, chairs, bar stools and tables. It appeared to be a place meant for cruisers to gather and/or relax, and we were immediately approached by a smiling waitress, asking if she could get us a glass of champagne, a cappuccino or something else.
“I’d love a hot chocolate,” I told her.
“Two,” Ace added.